alright... which one of you frickers has all the playdates

alright... which one of you frickers has all the playdates

It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14

Yakub: World's Greatest Dad Shirt $21.68

It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14

  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I pirated them

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >$400,000 worth
    >of this piece of shit
    So they got away with 100,000 of them?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >So they got away with 100,000 of them?
      Try 2,000. This piece of crap is being sold for $200. I think it opens a conspiracy, really. Are they in it for the insurance money? $200 for this? A crank, some buttons, an LED screen with no back lighting, people have to make their own games. Like there's no way it's NOT money laundering or an insurance fraud scheme, right?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >people have to make their own games
        huh

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          have to make their own games
          They supplied like 2 games or something and the rest are fan made

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            you some kind of moron or what

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          speaking out of his ass, but the thing is built mostly for people that develop and distribute smaller games or games of relatively simple complexity. indie dev's coffee-table item, which is also what it's marketed as

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            so it is a laundering scheme

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              no

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              shut up moron it's not a bad thing that they created an easy to use dev environment for free that you can use to make games with

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                or you could make actual games on godot and sell them on steam

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                you can sell them on playdate
                https://panic-inc.typeform.com/catalog

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Gamemaker, Godot, GDevelop, Clickteam are a thing

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Can i ask you, are you familiar with such engines or game maker things btw. are you a hobby dev?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Can you pls respond?

                there are literal millions of people who have used gamemaker, why do you care about what an anon on a zimbabwean pottery forum think?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I thought you might have more experience with things like this in general about game development. I was probably mistaken.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Got some experience with Gamemaker. Might come back to it.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                If you want to know anything. Unity and some other game engines can export directly to the Playdate. What the anon mentioned outside Godot cannot export to Playdate. Playdate also released a web UI thing to make a top down game for their system, all you need to do is label the game as Playdate on itch.io and people who have it can buy it directly on their console. The problem it is very limited and you need Unity to code anything worthwhile.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Can you pls respond?

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              i wish you guys would learn what money laundering means.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        i think there was one handheld console made in japan or italy made by organised crime synducates to launder money

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          if you are thinking of gizmondo that was swedish

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Yeah, and Chris Roberts (creator of Star Citizen now) was involved, but he's so clever that he got away with it at the last minute. Chris Roberts was the only person I know who:
          >robbed Microsoft and got away with it
          >robbed Hollywood israelites and got away with it
          >participated in a mafia scheme in Europe and got away with it

          Chris Roberts is like a moron who nobody takes seriously, but who in reality is a criminal genius.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        probably, pretty big brain of them until somone (you) mentions insurance fraud

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Pretty sure any insurance company is already aware of insurance fraud

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >200 burgers for this dinky little piece of shit
        Wew lad

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        why does it not seem like a legitimate console to you?
        call it overpriced and stupid, not a laundering scheme, the PS5 and Xbox One look more like laundering schemes than this

        >people have to make their own games
        huh

        and yet it has about 100x the exclusives of a modern console

        Lucas Pope's new game is really cute even though it's more of a silly digital toy than some big serious project. He made it to amuse his kids

        i was not even aware that it is finished, thanks anon

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Nah man. It's really suspicious.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >why does it not seem like a legitimate console to you?
            Because it has similar specs to a Gameboy. The old black and white one. And they're charging the same price for it. Difference is the GB was groundbreaking at the time whereas this is not. Stay mad about your console lmao
            >and yet it has about 100x the exclusives of a modern console
            And Flash has 1,000,000x the exclusives. You can't compare "lol I made a game XD" to console games and call it "exclusive". Your top seller is a rhythm game with no music.

            >Because it has similar specs to a Gameboy. The old black and white one. And they're charging the same price for it.
            american economy.
            the PS5 is twice the prize and has less games.
            >And Flash has 1,000,000x the exclusives. You can't compare "lol I made a game XD" to console games and call it "exclusive".
            why not

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You just can't okay?

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              The PS5 is not comparable.
              >american economy
              Non sequitur.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >shit that cost 50 cents in america 20 years ago now costs 10 dollars
                >a slight upgrade from a console that cost 200 dollars in america 20 years ago now costs the same
                where's the non sequitur?

                >the PS5 is twice the prize and has less games
                The ps5 also has colour. And music. And gameplay. And actual units sold LMAO
                >Why not
                Calling some kids bedroom project a game just distils the meaning of it. My YouTube videos I made as a teen are games. You can play them. You can pause them. That interaction as well as watching is gameplay. YouTube is the biggest console ever conceived.

                >ps5
                >gameplay
                heh
                >Calling some kids bedroom project a game
                that is exactly what games are. it is the corporate product that views art as a commodity that spits on the name of games.
                >My YouTube videos I made as a teen are games. You can play them. You can pause them.
                you have to be 18+ to post here, you are embarassing yourself. come back when you are a little more educated on the world of video games, and hear of genres like clicker games, farming sims, and visual novels. just because you do not like it, does not mean it is not a video game. and youtube videos can be absolutely played like games if there is a goal to be reached.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                lol get mad homosexual

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                why would i be mad? i was pointing out your error

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                That's not even me you stupid Black person hahahaha. >just because you do not like it, does not mean it is not a video game
                Just like you with youtube videos being my video games. Sorry they're not triple A multi-million dollar project like Snoy and Nintendo
                lmao

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                idk what you are talking about, but i really have no intention to get mad or argue.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                don't be a Black person, do you really think a glorified gameboy is worth half as much as any modern console? would you pay 200 bucks for an OG gameboy?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >do you really think
                i think it worth much more, because it actually has games, with originality and artistic intent
                meanwhile, the PS5 has:

                >don't be a Black person
                it is the Black person that wants a big flashy console to flex, like he does with everything. what Black person owns a playdate? you are the Black person.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >the PS5 is twice the prize and has less games
              The ps5 also has colour. And music. And gameplay. And actual units sold LMAO
              >Why not
              Calling some kids bedroom project a game just distils the meaning of it. My YouTube videos I made as a teen are games. You can play them. You can pause them. That interaction as well as watching is gameplay. YouTube is the biggest console ever conceived.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >why does it not seem like a legitimate console to you?
          Because it has similar specs to a Gameboy. The old black and white one. And they're charging the same price for it. Difference is the GB was groundbreaking at the time whereas this is not. Stay mad about your console lmao
          >and yet it has about 100x the exclusives of a modern console
          And Flash has 1,000,000x the exclusives. You can't compare "lol I made a game XD" to console games and call it "exclusive". Your top seller is a rhythm game with no music.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Your top seller is a rhythm game with no music
            What game are you referring to?

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous
              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Oh yeah that game looks like shit, I hated omaze which was made by the same dev. Omaze is one of the 24 games that comes bundled with the console. Even sweet baby's game was better

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        > Are they in it for the insurance money?
        They simply never existed, those two pallets missing are a made up story, whoops sorry your order got stolen and uhh we won't refund you because we're bankrupt, please ignore the huge house I just bought and the 8m I will get away with after 2 years or less of prison

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        don't they sell these for 400 dollars in US prisons?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        "Worth" is a stupid word. The asking price isn't what something is "worth". Until sold at that price it's only worth what it would cost to replace, which for these things is probably $20 tops.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They sell it at 200 dollars. It's basically aimed at hipsters, but the best thing they did was connect it right to Ich.io, so there is no regulation to new games people can install.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's not connected to itch in any official capacity, that's just a convenient place to share projects. Panic let's you install whatever you want from wherever you want. Furthermore if your game is officially published on-device you're still allowed to sell your game elsewhere without breach of contract, and people generally choose itch as a storefront

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Did this ever get a fishing game?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      yeah but it's not what you're imagining
      https://toadleyundercontrol.itch.io/reelisticfishing
      no dev has yet made a (good) fishing game where you crank to reel without any gimmicks. But there's at least one dev making such a game, I saw a prototype where you use the playdate's gyro sensor to "throw" the lure then use the crank to reel

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Since you seem to understand the subject, what "strategy" do you expect in a more or less realistic fishing game? Do you just spin the crank until the fish comes close? Or are there different speeds you need to use depending on the situation or something?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Sega Bass Fishing/Sonic Adventure are pretty solid fishing games. Usually it's just a matter of letting the line slack when the fish is pulling hard (not that anon)

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >$8 USD
        >(Or More)

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    woah two whole pallets that's crazy

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm pretty sure those two pallets were dumped in a landfill.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That means we're witnessing the beginning of another gaming crash

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I never had playdates because my mom didn't let me hangout with other kids until I was a teenager. Probably why I was such a hellraiser, no playdates.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You missed out, senpai.

      Even on 'play dates' I still got pussy.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >tfw autist so having a real play date was a rare event
      >sister had friends over all the time
      >they would either lock me out of the toy room or just be really mean and laugh at me

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What? I thought they were fresh dates! What the frick am I supposed to do with all this garbage?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      you've never had a date in your life, lying incel.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >you've never had a date in your life, lying incel.
        But date bars! They're delicious!
        https://www.ambitiouskitchen.com/ooey-gooey-dark-chocolate-espresso-date-oat-bars/

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    That's as many as 40,000 tens

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >how can we make our handheld relevant again?
    I don't think anyone will miss them if the story is true.

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    FOUR HUNDRED THOUSAND FRICKING PLAYDATES

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous
      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        i love this picture so much because its so stupid. the hat is fine though

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      backwards man I'm the backwards man, backwards man I'm the backwards man, I can walk backwards as fast as you can.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      FOUR HUNDRED THOUSAND FRICKING PLAYDATES, BOB

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why did they make $400,000 worth of playdates in the first place?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      70,000 playdates have been sold

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      To commit insurance fraud with.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      anon learns the hard way that people are buying them, niche as they are

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    South American gangs

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Worse
      NAZIS

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    So they lost a single pallet of Playdate consoles in a warehouse somewhere. Why is this even news?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'm assuming because it's at least a half of all produced Playdates.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      To keep these things in the public conscious

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Imply those things
      1. exist
      2. people care enough about them to steal them
      Starfield did it too

  14. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >"Missing"

  15. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What the frick is a Playdate? You all running homosexual shit up in here?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      basically OUYA crank

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Lol. It looks like parody but it's probably real.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >it's probably real
          https://www.kotaku.com.au/2019/05/video-games-should-be-weirder/

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            sincerely hope kotaku's staff get burned alive

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              What amazes me most is that someone at wikipedia thought this information was relevant enough to put on the page.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You mean the writer published the article then when to add a link to it on wikipedia.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >white males cause us suffering by creating trash like "playdate"
            >we need to rid to them
            i understand where they are coming from and fully support it

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        wtf I love the playdate now

  16. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Is this a tax write off?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Insurance bro. Covers their frick up.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Its an insurance fraud.

  17. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I will find and kill the playdate poacher

  18. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I have them, I put them next to all my ouyas

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >ouya
      yeah that happened

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Based Ouya rememberer.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I still remember how they made Ouya-tan so endearingly sad that they had to put "PLEASE DO NOT ACTUALLY BUY AN OUYA" on art of her

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          she cute

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          she cute

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            We need a playdate tan

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              https://consoletan.booru.org/index.php?page=post&s=list&tags=playdate
              only 19, looks like this design seems to be popular (for being drawn well)

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Looks all wrong. She should look like a skeezy-looking hipster b***h in her late 30s.

  19. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Lucas Pope's new game is really cute even though it's more of a silly digital toy than some big serious project. He made it to amuse his kids

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Oh it actually has buttons like a game boy
      Only start and select are missing
      I was always under the impression that if only has a crank and that's the only input method

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >He made it to amuse his kids
      >The one game being shilled is a kids game
      P-playdate bros...

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's always been advertised as a glorified thing you have at your desk and use for a few minutes on your break, so the games are simple casual ones you can pick up and play.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Most are free
      They're literally lying to your face. If this isn't hard shilling, I don't know what is

      This gimmick handheld is made by a bunch of Californians with all the worst things about them, it's the epitome of pozzed shit. I would rather buy a chink handheld that can emulate everything than this trash.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Californians
        why do playdate haters get the most basic facts wrong

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >"buuuuh achkutally they're not based in california!!!!"
          sure thing Black person, all they do is emulate everything californians do from the pronouns to their politics to even getting diversity consultants, they're californians in everything but name.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >He made it to amuse his kids
      Another dev whose games I now can no longer enjoying after discovering they're sexhavers.

  20. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Insurance fraud
    Panic Inc should be panicking once the feds get involved.

  21. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They likely got destroyed when somebody stacked a ton of shit on top of them and now they'll end up in a dumpster on the northside.

  22. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Probably on that cargo ship that crashed into that bridge.

  23. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    couldn't have happened to more deserving people.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Deserving because... let me guess, they disagreed with you on twitter.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        no, I just don't like them. They haven't done anything particularly wrong except for selling an overpriced handheld. I just genuinely don't respect them.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          playdate has made good on all of it's promises and didn't have to resort to shitty kickstarter grifts. they made a good product that people like and have cultivated a whole dev community to makes games for it. you lost, playdate won

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >all of it's promises
            they promised to launch it for way cheaper than they did.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >oy vey 20 whole dollars

              they even kept the old price if you preordered earlier so you have no leg to stand on

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                What price did they promise? Initial preorders were $179 (how much I spent) and later on they raised the price to $200

                i recall them promising sub 150 at a time.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                also if that didn't happen then it's a mandela effect, so don't bother trying to argue for your side. muting. any response is just gonna be talking to a wall, so don't bother.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >mandela effect

                redditor

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >if that didn't happen then it's a mandela effect
                I'm stealing this

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              What price did they promise? Initial preorders were $179 (how much I spent) and later on they raised the price to $200

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Playdate has fallen and the devs are being hunted and killed as we speak.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >they made a good product
            No, they made a useless gadget for soi drinking hipsters.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I drink onions, but not a hipster.
              I just have the money to collect vidya shit.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            still not buying your shitty device. cope and seethe homosexual

  24. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    people are really buying this thing? lol

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      buy my thinly veiled fishing game emulator
      what's wrong don't you like gaming
      time to reel em in pardner and giddy up
      over a few games all based on really reel (tm) fishing line technology to provide haptic feedback to make you really feel like fisherman jones when he lands the big one no matter where you are.

      Look at how strong his zeal for life is
      the fish not the fisherman
      his remaining life fleeting like a flickering flame

      If only he played more playdate video games his exit from this wretched mortal coil may have been forestalled long enough to make it another week to get two (2) (II) two more games per week for the rest of his weak on the final wind of his coil.

      Don't let his life be in vain.

  25. 3 weeks ago
    sagent

    not buying your shitty toy, frick off

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The playdate is made from the same plastic that plastic straws are made from. If you don't buy my playdate with really reel technology you're directly responsible for producing more plastic straws which means people will litter more plastic straws into the ocean and kill more turtles.

      buy it or there's turtle blood on your hands (it's not even good for soup)

      or just buy the turtle instead

  26. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    And nothing of value has been lost.

  27. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Sounds like a way to worm out of having to actually launch this garbage.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      it sold out on launch

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >launch product
        >"buy out" your product
        >run news articles claiming it sold out
        >perceived value increases
        >consumer buy product for high price

  28. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    YES I DID IT! I DID IT! I TOOK THE PLAYDATES THEY'RE HERE! UNDER THE CATALOG

  29. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    LumpyTouch is working on PlayDate Adventure games.

  30. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    damn those stealing motherfrickers are going to be extremely disappointed when they open their prize

  31. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    your teenage sister and I have quite a few playdates coming up...

  32. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Ever heard of insurance fraud?
    Yeh sure someone totally stole that shit. It's all in the trustworthy gaming news so fork over the insurance money

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Is theft not a thing like arson or murder, where insurance companies will try 15x as hard to frick you out of money on it? I know most house insurance won't pay for arson at all

  33. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    BA-NA-NA

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      how hard would it be really for russia to do that? i know they can't do lithography as belgium or some other european country has a monopoly on that entire process but they could surely import a ton of chinese longsoon or mobile chips and optimize the hell out of them in terms of software which the russians are very good at

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >how hard would it be really for russia to do that?
        What making a console? So easy even a fricking Black person can do that. Any moron can pay china to slap some parts together and call it a console.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Lmao completly forgot about this

          Atomic Heart was better optimized than every other AAA title.

          ssshhh anon we're supposed to pretend it isn't actually russian

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >optimize
        >Nigeria with snow
        >optimize
        Only thing they optimize is embezzlement

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Look up the credits to any game you like and try to find one without at least one slavic sounding name.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >David... Clearly anglicized Dimitri! This is a russian game!
            You vatniks are so pathetic.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Atomic Heart was better optimized than every other AAA title.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            It's doom, sergey

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >i know they can't do lithography as belgium or some other european country has a monopoly on that entire process
        Russia has chip factories, yes, they're still on massive nodes but they're able to print some chips, and they got several cpu design companies, the problem I find with this is that no one outside russia will release any games for it, so it would be a very expensive paperweight.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Frick me I want this to be real for how silly it is.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      do redditors really see articles like this and believe them?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Harkonnen and the spice

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >putin reintroduces soviet union
      >just to make a game console
      Clown World timeline is paying off.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      A Russian game Console would probably get banned in the USA right away but it would most likely be a gaming PC with a sketchy OS, I would like to see them do it

  34. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Fake game consoles

  35. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >400k worth
    According to who?

  36. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They finished digging the burn pit already?

  37. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    at least ouya buyers actually got the thing

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I have a playdate THOUGH

  38. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >sales are so good you have to resort to insurance fraud

  39. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    does anyone else find the name "playdate" fricking repulsive or is it just me

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'm sure it sounds great to someone who'd pay 200$ for one.

  40. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No one bought that shit so they destroyed it and try to scam their insurance company

  41. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Insurance fraud?

  42. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It was John

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      THE BAPTIST?!?!!?!?!??!?!?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        John, son of Saint John.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      John the fisherman?

  43. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I tried to order one but the import and shipping fees were quite high. I still wanted to get it though but you need a credit card to buy one, many countries don't actually use credit cards all that much and so I couldn't buy it.

  44. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >400,000 worth
    No one believes this shit lmao

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      would only be 2000 at their price of $200
      you could probably fit a crate of 2000 of these things in a minivan

  45. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    probably the people who loaned them the money

  46. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    This is literally the first time I've heard about this "console". Why would anyone buy this? What's the appeal?

  47. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    were the games for the playdate free or did you still have to buy them separately?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      most are free, some cost 1-8 dollars

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Most are free
        They're literally lying to your face. If this isn't hard shilling, I don't know what is

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          https://itch.io/search?q=playdate

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I have a playdate and this isn't true. You get 24 free games with purchase but those two free Catalog games are the only two free games available, other than the ones you can find on itch.io (or elsewhere). There are a sizable amount of good free games but the majority are for sale on the catalog/itch

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >most games are free
          >this isn't true, you only get 24 free games + 2 games on main site + dozens of itch games
          i don't understand what you were trying to say. what other console has more free games? if you want to complain, talk about the fact that the games that DO cost money are usually 5 bucks for a 5 minute game, not that there are no free games when free games are half the catalogue.

          At what time do you predict the playdate will exit the market?

          why would it "exit"? it has a niche it appeals to

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >what other console has more free games
            Steam Deck

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Relax. It's not factual to say that most games are free because there are lots and lots of paid itch & catalog games. I'm not saying it's a bad deal or anything.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >what other console has more free games?
            Any pc, and I'm not talking about pirating. Epic gives away free games every week. So does amazon and gog.
            There are also free to play games in every other console.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >a pc is a console
              Ganker is more moronic than usual today

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                pedantic frick

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You can be pedantic about it, but they're both just computers that play games.

  48. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They are hidden in my ass.

  49. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I still think it's funny how much seethe a console specifically made for a specific niche audience generates on Ganker.

  50. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They dumped them all in a landfill in rural Nevada in the middle of the night and are now claiming they were stolen so they can write them off on their taxes. Because nobody was buying them, so the company decided to cut their losses and try and recoup as much as they could before the firesale of their valuable assets.

  51. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    *raises paw*

  52. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Somebody out there is doing a whole lot of cranking.

  53. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Oh n-

  54. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I still don't understand the appeal of this thing

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's for hobby devs to make and sell weird little experimental games on. It was never advertised as something for general audiences.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Now this is cope

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          How is stating the literal intent of the project cope?

  55. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    never heard about this thing. The name alone is ass, sounds like something tumblr would've loved
    The whole selling point is a crank or what?
    I would be interested if it used something novel like paper ink display
    or had strict restrictions like pico8

  56. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    they never existed. it was a grift.

  57. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    insurance fraud, they threw their trash handhelds in a fricking creek somewhere to try to make back some of their money certainly no one thought they were worth stealing

    • 3 weeks ago
      sage

      assuming this wasnt made up for publicity that is. sage in all fields Black folk

  58. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    damn, that's like 12 playdates

  59. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    this is absolutely a scam lmao. Nobody would steal this piece of shit, there is ZERO demand for it

  60. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >playdate
    this is literally an Arduino, or a Raspberry Pi, inside a 3d printed resin Ganker case isnt it?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      it actually is not, it's its own bespoke hardware

  61. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Obvious insurance scam since nobody bought this hipster trash.

  62. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >troony Twitter devs with craft brewery mustaches really thought this was going to be the next big thing
    >only people who bought one were some Youtubers who just wanted to make of fun of it

    kek

  63. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm using them as a backstop for my rifle range

  64. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    WTF is this thing even meant to be, a handheld console for 4th world failed states that some hipsters started buying ironicly for a 100x markup price?

  65. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Sounds like insurance fraud.

  66. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    they stole their own because they don't have any.

  67. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    This has to be the dumbest hipster homosexual soi gimmicky """""console""""" out there. I hope this thing fails as bad as the ouya, it deserves it.

  68. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why do so many people itt think the playdate literally doesn't exist

  69. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    they're scamming insurance imo

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yup. They can't sell them to customers so they're trying to sell them to an insurance firm.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        70,000 playdates have been sold

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Past sales are not future sales.

  70. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >make a soi gimmick device thinking it will be revolutionary and will sell out just like the miniSNES or miniNES
    >price it at $200
    >try to dupe hipsters into buying it
    >even they don't want it
    >have to resort to insurance fraud to make money on it
    kek. At least the ouya didn't try to pull an exit scam like this. Also, the worst thing about shitty devices like this is that some redditors will be in denial about how shitty it is and will pretend they enjoy using it. Same thing happened with the ouya.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      At what time do you predict the playdate will exit the market?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I give it a few months tops.

  71. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I have had fun with mine.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      me too

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >he paid $200 to play a shitty barebones city builder on a black & white low pixel screen that even that the Gameboy color could mog.
        lol that looks like trash. please an hero immediately

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I have had fun with mine.

        If it was notably cheaper and had a few good system sellers, I'd totally get one
        Even the Lucas Pope game doesn't look like it'll be that interesting though

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Even the Lucas Pope game doesn't look like it'll be that interesting though
          It's not worth buying the system for. It's extremely well made but not much of an actual game

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          As another owner of one (mainly for the appeal of programming for it), the lack of killer apps is my main problem with it. All of the games are similar in scope to flash games and there are no games that actually feel like proper experiences. Lucas Pope's game is super stylish and fun for what it is but it's still much less memorable than Obra Dinn and Papers Please. It desperately needs something that isn't a puzzle or arcade game based around one central gimmick.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I agree with this post. My hope is that devs will get better at making games as the SDK matures, kind of like how gameboy games became more technically impressive over time as the devs became more familiar with the hardware. Personally I don't care about games with huge scope, I just want polish

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Serious question: How were you able to afford one? I didn't think you'd have money left over from your hormone replacement therapy to be able to dish out $200 for a device like this.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Thanks to bathtub hormones, duh.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >trannies appropriating trap art
                Grim.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous
              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >The found troony ball hair from brazil in one of these

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >It desperately needs something that isn't a puzzle or arcade game based around one central gimmick.
            >buys a gimmick device
            >suprised that all games are based on that 1 gimmick
            imagine being this moronic

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >As another owner of one (mainly for the appeal of programming for it),
            You know that you can program games for pretty much any other device right? You don't need to buy a scam $200 piece of shit to be able to program games. Hell you probably would've been better off buying a graphing calculator and programming for that.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              yeah but those devices don't have a crank

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You live in an age where we have full 3D VR, and advanced motion controls yet you're obsessing over a shitty aliexpress-tier crank? you're hopeless. If you had more than 2 working neurons you could also just design your own using a pico or some other pi-based pcb

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                can you show me where on aliexpress I can buy a hall effect crank

                how do you know?

                of course
                https://playdate-wiki.com/wiki/PlayDOOM

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >or arcade game based around one central gimmick.
            Good luck with that when the whole device is based around one central gimmick.

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You can use the crank for anything. That's like saying traditional controllers lead to stick-based gimmicks. What they're really criticizing is scope, as playdate games are usually very small

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Does this even have sound?
        If so how many extra cranks do you have to do for sound?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Does this even have sound?
          of course it does
          >If so how many extra cranks do you have to do for sound?
          what do you mean

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The only sounds you'll hear when playing this thing is your wife and tyrone getting it on in the other room.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous
    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Some people have fun doing all kinds of degenerate shit, like literally eating dogshit or giving each other HIV. It doesn't make it right or logical.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >having fun with a toy is LITERALLY THE SAME THING AS EATING LITERAL SHIT
        god i fricking hate morons

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >doesn't the capacity to understand analogies
          No wonder you gave away $200 to a fraudulent company.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Where's the fraud?

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              the fraud is that you overpaid for a shitty device that's worth $50 at most.You got conned b***h.

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                That's not fraud that's just overpricing

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      me too

      Shit taste detected. Off yerselves.

  72. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  73. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >americans will pay 199 american dollars + tip to own this

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >brick game
      My childhood. I used to have one but my dad snapped it in half in drunken fit because I wasn't paying attention

  74. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The correct one is 400.000 with a point, stupid Anglos

  75. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    this is the most soi thing to ever exist. it would be nintendo labo but at least that's aimed at actual children, not manchildren

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      the most soi thing to exist is the guy obsessively replying with his cuck fantasies to every second post in the thread

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Literally no one is doing that here, you seething troony. You're just mad no one but a few trannies like this shitty thing

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          there are 43 posts in this thread attributed to your ip address

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            how do you know?

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              He doesn't, he's just a shitty low-effort troll

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I definitely haven't posted 43 times in this thread. Also, what is that supposed to prove? That I posted in this thread? We kinda know that already don't we?

  76. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Sounds like insurance fraud

  77. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Can it run DOOM?

  78. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    so is that like all of them? hopefully. good ridance

  79. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    snoys and tendies on suicide watch

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      that looks really shitty.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      is something supposed to be happening here
      I can't tell if it's even functioning
      amazing what people will waste money on

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >that very noticeable delay on the crank input
      this alone kills it entirely

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        there's no delay on crank input unless the dev is bad

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >the average playdate hipster is too weak from consuming nothing but soi to even be able to hold it up
      >has to create a holder for it instead
      kek, you can't make this shit up

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      What's the point in having the crank gimmick if you're just gonna use it like a button?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You're right. Some games use the crank to great effect (such as flying games where the angle of the crank determines direction), but others use it in a way that brings to mind the data of Wii waggle where inputs that should have been a button force you to shake instead. I think some games bind buttons to the crank simply because there are so few buttons

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Whats even going on there? I thought he was tapping morse for coordinates or something, but then he pressed A and it still moved.
      Anyway I think I already played this on NES years ago

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Even if I tried explaining it to you, you still wouldn't understand. This game is too high IQ for you brainlet.

  80. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Gimmick seems fun but it's more like $50 fun not $200.

  81. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I've never seen a more blatant instance of insurance fraud

  82. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >be soi-drinking hipster gay
    >pay $200 to preorder a dogshit game """console""" with no games
    >fast forward a few years
    >sorry goy, we uh "lost" the merchandise.
    >company goes bankrupt & dissolves
    >sorry goy, no refunds!
    You deserve this if you actually gave these people your money

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Preorders have already shipped

  83. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    A FRICKING CRANK

  84. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >done scamming players
    >time to start scamming their insurance company
    Well these guys stick to their path, I guess.

  85. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >dude muh hipsters

    I will take a thousand millennial hipsters over one troony broccoli haired zoomer. oh no they like beer and mustaches oh nooooo

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I will take a thousand millennial hipsters over one troony broccoli haired zoomer
      >he thinks these two groups are mutually exclusive

  86. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Every entertainment device can only be successful if they answer the following question: Can it play Undertale?

  87. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    man their arms are gonna fall off from spinning 200,000 cranks to charge them all

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The crank-to-charge unfortunately didn't make it to the final product.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Have you ever used a crank flashlight or radio? It sucks. I don't get why people want this feature. It would make the crank's action feel worse. It charges extremely quickly anyway

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Have you ever used a crank flashlight or radio?
          Yes, and I've had to use both this past year. I'll take a crank flashlight that'll always work even if it's a little dim, vs. being caught without batteries during a long blackout.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >In an emergency situation with no power
            >"Oh God I hope I can still charge my playdate"

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Playdate screen has no backlight, so you'd have to crank both the Playdate and the flashlight.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >why people want this feature
          >portable widget with no dependence on mains power
          it's a mystery
          >inb4 you have to spin it for 120 minutes
          whatever.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The crank-to-charge unfortunately didn't make it to the final product.

      Following this to the logical conclusion means developing a controller where the analog sticks and triggers charge the battery
      Actually brb gonna patent that real quick

  88. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Does this thing have a golf game?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There are two that I know of but I'm not partial to either of them. This one looks more promising but it's not out yet
      https://rokashi.itch.io/faraway-fairway

  89. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    A HECKIN' CRANK

  90. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'd rather opt for something worth a shit instead.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Did they ever fix the shoulder buttons being shit on those?

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Sadly not. I think I saw some custom mods somewhere with other buttons attached to it.

        I'd rather play new games than the same shitty retro games I've been playing for 30 years

        I will do that too. As soon as Retroid Pocket 5 Pro comes out.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I'd rather play new games than the same shitty retro games I've been playing for 30 years

  91. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >notoriously overpriced and underdeveloped hardware company
    I'd be surprised if the manufacturing cost even broke 40k

  92. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >been out for 2 years
    >gimmick is that is has a crank
    >no fishing game where you use the crank properly
    what the frick are these morons doing

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Every dev is waiting for every other dev to make it because everyone assumes everyone else is making the fishing game

  93. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They made 800000 playdates!
    For who?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I thought it was a genuinely good idea. Like Roblox meets GameMaker.

      But attaching it to a physical piece of hardware and charging $200 is moronic.

  94. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >$400,000 worth

    It's not worth anything until they actually sell.

  95. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I know what happened.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      pretty good

  96. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Wait, hang on... the crank is a gameplay element?
    I thought it's a little dynamo so you can recharge your battery.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Wait, hang on... the crank is a gameplay element?
      it's not just *a* gameplay element, it's *the* gameplay element. It doesn't charge the battery even though the conmen running the company said it would.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >the conmen running the company said it would.
        They never said this

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          They did. It was a planned feature and they backed away from it at launch, hoping people would forget.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            When and where did they say so?

  97. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >2 pallets
    >400k worth
    what the actual frick

  98. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Damn that’s like 100 of them

  99. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >check mercari to see if they’re selling the stolen ones yet
    >$475
    >$499
    >two previously sold for $150 and $200
    Jesus dude I’d pay $70 for that thing tops

  100. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    they got stolen guys we swear no tax fraud here

  101. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    what? what the frick? huh?

  102. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why does the playdate make Ganker so tsundere

  103. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >reminded of the crank
    Thanks op, day was rough but remembering this somehow existed gave me a chuckle

  104. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I sold mine.
    This honestly really feels off to me. The system sucks. Like, it fricking sucks. It's horrible to hold, it is not ergonomic at all, the crank is actually terrible, and you can't fricking SEE THE SCREEN. Even with light THE SCREEN HAS A HORRIBLE GLARE

    It's fricking insane it's selling at all.

  105. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    2000 dollars worth*. Just because they sell these things for 200 dollars doesn't mean they are worth more than 1 dollar to make. There were 2,000 zoomer bait devices in that pallet. That's it. 2000 dollars worth of eWaste.

  106. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Imagine being such a hipster redditor you spend 200 dollars on this instead of a Retroid Pocket 4 Pro which can play Nintendo Switch games in handheld mode. I just beat the new PoP on mine last night, at a locked 60FPS native handheld mode res the entire game.

  107. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    where's soldier boy

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