>joke character is also the most powerful by far. >true neutral alignment

>joke character is also the most powerful by far
>true neutral alignment

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    ALL self inserts should be killed

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >ALL FEMALE self inserts should be killed
      FTFY

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Luke absolutely feels like wish fulfilment

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Luke is the every-man, not so plain to be a self-insert, but just naive and immature enough that his journey feels like the archetypal hero's journey and evolution into adulthood.
          Rey is bland as frick and never develops at all, or has interesting character interactions. Huge difference.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I'm not defending Rey, I'm saying Like is absolutely a self insert. Both for the audience and the author, who's last name just so happens to be LUCAS

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Think about it. Spielberg? israelite. Lucas? israelite. Kyle? israelite. Coincidence?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                George's a Methodist

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I was quoting a South Park episode. George literally follows up with "I'm not a israelite!" then quickly backtracks.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          This, I want to kiss my sister so badly.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Go back to your thread, Andy

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Let me hit you with some hard truths.

            1. Incest is deeply ingrained as wrong in our DNA. Regardless of culture, incest is always seen as taboo. That's why it's fetishized so much in some cultures, but that just drives home how wrong it is.
            2. People get super horny around when they fall asleep/wake up. Hormones go crazy at that time.
            3. Because of 2, people often do things at night that they regret the next day. I can speak from personal experience.
            4. If you want to do anything sexual with your sister, you'd better do it at night, and you'd better work up to it. She'll freak out if you randomly kiss her out of nowhere, but she can probably be coaxed into you sleeping with your arm around her. It's just a slow matter of time before she's ready for more.
            5. Incest is fricked up, man. Don't do it.

            I hope this guide was helpful.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              I'm getting mixed messages from this post

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I try to be helpful and disincentivizing at the same time. It makes things complicated.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Thats how you know its genuine and not something made for memes or to validate your opinion.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Or just not a copypasta.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        'unexplained power level' should be checked for anikin anyway because of how silly midichlorians are

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Midichlorians are an explanation. Just a bad one that they didn't need to give. In the same sense, declaring Rey to be Palpatine's granddaughter also counts as an explanation and this image must have been made before that movie was released.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Palpatine's granddaughter also counts as an explanation
            does it though, palpatine still needed to train and study forbidden sith text to get his power.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Midichlorians are an explanation. Just a bad one that they didn't need to give. In the same sense, declaring Rey to be Palpatine's granddaughter also counts as an explanation and this image must have been made before that movie was released.

              rey being palps offspring doesnt mean shit, palp wasnt as strong or stronger than anakin, anakin was the strongest.
              they went full moron with new series and made entire franchise history obsolete
              she was more powerful than most jedi with 0 training, and no explanation given

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          they aren't really silly they just had to make it legally distinct from Dune and so ripped out 50% of the explanation

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            It was still stupid to take something that was explicitly spiritual in the original trilogy and try to give it a hard scientific explanation. Why does Arthur pull the sword from the stone? Is it because he's the chosen one, or because the stone is actually a non-Newtonian fluid that has greater resistance the more force is applied to it, and only the strongest knights in the kingdom had tried to extricate it before Arthur? The second explanation might be a good deconstruction, but only the first gives the character narrative significance. Frick off with your "um ackshually he had the best genes" shit. A fantasy story about space wizards shouldn't be reduced to eugenics.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >A fantasy story about space wizards shouldn't be reduced to eugenics.
              it's in-line with the political focus of the prequel trilogy that is constantly undermined. I imagine the midicholorians or whatever were just a holdover from the drawing board phase when every movie was as dark as RotS

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                That's entirely what makes the prequels feel like a completely different series than the original trilogy. I've never really been a Star Wars fan in the first place, but purely from a writing perspective, the two trilogies don't mesh at all. It's cool if you want to do space politics and weird genetic supremacy stuff, but it's not what people know as "Star Wars".

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I think it is entirely okay for him to want to go with a different "vibe" or whatever because he was ultimately depicting a different era with different characters. The OG trilogy has a band of ragtags doing funny band of bastards type things, whereas in the prequels you are dealing with hyper-important figures in the presiding galactic society. Going for the same (almost completely nebulous) feeling would pretty much ruin what little merit those movies ever had, which is proven by the fact that they are almost completely shit because it is a totally different type of story bogged down by le funny hijinks because someone choked at the though of them trying to be different than the OG.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Luke has a personality and experiences the best growth in the trilogy
        He goes from whiny kid, to wannabe heroic hothead to wise master
        Meanwhile, Leia mostly stays the same and Han's development is all in the first film

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Luke
        >perfectly good
        He gets tempted towards the dark side several times and acts upon his anger in Empire Strikes Back. Saying that he has no personality compared to Anakin is absolutely hilarious and makes this pretty much bait.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >everybody hates Rey's guts
        >i know what we need! an origin movie for her!!
        Jesus christ disney....

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Tom Bombadill isn't Tolkien's self-insert, he's just there to give the story some scale and establish that there are things older and bigger than Sauron and Middle Earth

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        his point is to say that the story is pointless in the grand scheme of things?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Every story doesn't need universe ending stakes. I see far too much of that from Hollywood. It all feels so meaningless now

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          How is it pointless? Bombadil's an anomaly who basically exists in his own little corner of the world where he and the rest of Middle Earth don't really interact. The Ring has no effect on him at all but he also can't be trusted to guard it as he'll either lose it as he's extremely flighty and will forget about it or Sauron would eventually track it down and bring the might of his entire force down on Tom's little patch of forest and Gandalf thought that not even Tom could stand up against that for long.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          How to say "I'm a Marvel-slop loving moron" without actually saying it.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Apparently Tom was Tolkien’s toy, so he put the character in there for his son. Also, you can tell from the first part of the first book that it was probably intended on being a more child-friendly book like the Hobbit, but then Tolkien changed it at about the time the hobbits meet up with Aragorn. The part with Tom and the narrow-wights or whatever felt really different from the rest of the book.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >tolkien’s toy
          I meant Tolkien’s son’s toy.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          barrow wights

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Yeah, auto correct is fricking my shit up.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Fellowship of the Ring also takes about half of the fricking book before the hobbits get out of the Shire. I really think Tolkien just wanted to linger on that part of the world as long as he could. It's also my understanding that the three books were initially intended to be a single book, but his publisher told him he was a psychopath and forced him to split it into three.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Or more likely, it wasn't going to be quite the grand scale adventure it turned out to be

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Maybe, but Tolkien was a pretty meticulous writer who planned out way more than he needed to, hence the creation of four fictional Elvish languages and all the supplementary stuff he wrote that ended up in The Silmarillion/Unfinished Tales/etc. I doubt he ever thought Fellowship was just going to be The Hobbit pt. 2.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >hence the creation of four fictional Elvish languages and all the supplementary stuff he wrote that ended up in The Silmarillion/Unfinished Tales/etc.
                Tolkien actually made up the languages first and the stories later.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Well, yeah, he was a linguist. But he was planning stuff for LotR during WW1. My point is that he had all the ideas before he actually started writing.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              not really, it is more like the entirety of RotK in the way of the hobbits hinges on their attachment to the Shire. the ending wouldn't be nearly as poignant and the initial safety of the Fellowship wouldn't feel nearly as earned without the beginning of FotR

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            His publisher wanted to split the series into three parts. Originally it was just going to be the first and third book. It's why no one even knows for sure which of the various towers the "Two Towers" even are supposed to be.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              That makes some sense, but there's too much in The Two Towers that isn't incidental for it to just have been a publisher mandate, unless you mean that part of it was originally in FotR and the other part was in RotK. But that still leaves two books that would be over 600-700 pages each.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I watched an in-depth video about this exact thing and if I recall it was specifically because printing at the time these were supposed to be published was prohibitively expensive and the publisher basically told him that the cost to print a frick huge like 1k page+ book when sales weren't even guaranteed was ridiculous, so TK reluctantly agreed to split the book into 3 to cut costs on production/stagger the releases or something. I believe the channel is In Deep Geek, can't really recall.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I haven't seen that video, but I totally buy that story. I thought it was originally just one book, but that still pretty much jives with what I remember reading years ago.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                It might have just been one book, it might have been two. Again, I don't really remember. I do know that three was definitely something that TK didn't want initially which is why the pacing and titling of the second book is off.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I mean, his publisher was right. The books are long as shit even split into three. But I can definitely see the pacing being better if it was just two.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                This is the video. I got it backwards, TK actually wanted it to be in 6 parts, so it was cut down to 3.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Damn, I guess I've had it wrong for the better part of two decades.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I always thought the two towers were Barad Dur and Orthanc

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Wait it's not?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                That video gives like three different explanations from tolkien of which towers it could be. The marketing for the jackson movies implied it was orthanc and barad dur. The artwork from tolkien for the book makes it seem like its minas morgul and orthanc.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I googled and it's apparently a whole thing
                https://www.birmingham.gov.uk/info/50166/j_r_r_tolkien/1588/the_two_towers
                Tolkien said in different times that it's orthanc and minas morgul or orthanc and cirith ungol
                It's definitely not minas tirith, that much we know

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                It also just doesn't matter. It's an arbitrary title. Don't get hung up on it.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                in letters to his editor he literally flip flopped on which towers it was supposed to be referring to, at first he said it was supposed to be ambiguous and liked the title, then he said it was specifically referring to two towers, and then later wrote that he hated the title because it wasnt explicitly clear enough

                Interesting, I used to think it was pretty cut and dried. I'm just going to go with my <headcanon>

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                not unlike what happened to Book of the New Sun I guess

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Are you taking the piss? Surely it's Isengard and Barad-dur, since the majority of the books 3 and 4 are about the axis of evil between Saruman and Sauron? (before Saruman gets too wienery and btfo)

              I get that it could be Minas Tirith or Cirith Ungol, but they really don't have much presence until books 5 and 6

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                in letters to his editor he literally flip flopped on which towers it was supposed to be referring to, at first he said it was supposed to be ambiguous and liked the title, then he said it was specifically referring to two towers, and then later wrote that he hated the title because it wasnt explicitly clear enough

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >It's why no one even knows for sure which of the various towers the "Two Towers" even are supposed to be

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >knows nothing about the source material he is a fan of
                terrible

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Anon, nobody else thinks its anything but the two towers occupied by the two major antagonists of the books.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                except for the author of the books

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                You can be the author and still have a complete disconnect from what other people are able to gauge through simple common sense unless you think they're an infallible mouthpiece, devoid of criticism.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          A Long Expected Party is very much supposed to be lighthearted and fun due to the nature of hobbits. Chapter 2 is when things take a turn diving into the history. I don't think he intended it to be like a children's book but honestly Tolkien takes everything lightheartedly in his books so I think it just comes of as child friendly

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I think a big part of it is we very rarely see people die in the books. When Boromir died, iirc they simply found his body. He doesn't like to dwell on the heroics of one's last moments before death because that notion was bled out of him in the trenches.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        tom bombadill is basically the fricking ghost of christmas present. I got insane tonal whiplash when I read that for the first time.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Tom never really comes across as a self-insert outside of the perfect little happy marriage he has with his wife Goldberry. He's more just a representation of nature itself.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        por favor não, pai do milho

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The Hobbits were Tolkien's self-insert not Tom.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The hobbits were just his countrymen.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Tom bombadil
      >self insert
      Wrong, bucko

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Honest question here, who's that?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The Beyonder, or Kami Tenchi equivalent of the Tolkien universe.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Tom Bombadil

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      My main man Tommy B

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      file from the jpg series.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      me 🙂

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        post pics of your wife's feet plz

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      tombadil merryello bombadil dellyo

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Thomas Bombardier

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Melkor.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Melkor was so mindbroken by being overthrown by his subordinate that he became a whimsical fairy man living in the woods
        That would be pretty funny, honestly.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Pico from Boku no Pico

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      He never shuts up and makes every audio book kill you by cringe, he is the bomb da'ill kill you

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Old Tom Bombadil was a merry fellow;
      bright blue his jacket was and his boots were yellow,
      green were his girdle and his breeches all of leather;
      he wore in his tall hat a swan-wing feather.
      He lived up under Hill, where the Withywindle
      ran from a grassy well down into the dingle.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      a comment

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      My homie puddleglum

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    But would Bombadil truly be the most powerful if he was outside of his forest?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Tom Bombadil existed before there were any trees

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      that forest is his waifu's he'd be fine outside of it

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Does it matter if he gives exactly zero fricks?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      No. It's explicitly mentioned that Tom would be the last force of good in the world to fall before Sauron, but he in the end would fall too when alone.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Never got into tolkino untill recently.
    Started with reading the hobbit on a whim after someone left it behind in the entrance hall of my studio appartement.
    Are the other middle-earth stuff just as good or was this the peak?
    No preference on reading or watching.
    Mainly watched the movies, because a coworker who was major fan recommended it and a friend wanted to watch it together.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      the lotr is really good too. the silmarillion is all ancient history for the hobbit and a slog to read so you should only bother if you want the lore dump

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I forgot to mention that it was the peter jackson trilogy I watched and not the hobbit trilogy.
        I honestly can't imagine how they squeezed 3 movies out of that one book.[spoiler]
        So basically I watched read all the good stuff and the rest is just consuming more for the sake of consuming more?
        I am a new fan, but I can't imagine the new Amazon being anything else than a cashgrab to get people to spend more on an old IP.
        [/spoiler]

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Amazon series is basically raping Tolkien's corpse, pretend it doesn't exist.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            fun fact he put in hi will that none of his works were to be ever adapated by disney because he fear this

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Too bad his grandson doesn't give a flying shit about what his grandfather wanted or didn't want and is only using the IP to cash in now, possibly out of spite.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I got into Hobbit/LotR back in grade school in the 90s and read up on Tolkien when I got the internet back in the late 90s. I remember thinking he wouldn't have been too happy with the Hollywoodization of his works in the Jackson movies and definitely would have objected to the rereleases of his books that plastered the movies' actors all over the front and back of them (think some editions even had inserts with even more pictures from the movies in them too). He definitely would have pissed over the Hobbit trilogy as it fricked with his original story to stretch it out to three films by adding bits he never wrote, and he would have never have let the Mordor games or the Amazon series to happen due to the same thing of outright changing his lore and story events.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                even Chris hated the Jackson movies and he was much less anal than Tolkien Sr.
                I definitely think they are marvels of filmmaking, but there are parts of the books that are just destroyed because someone couldn't help themselves. I feel better off thinking of them as two entities.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Yeah, taken by themselves they're fine but I start to get annoyed when I see somebody say you only need to see the movies and to just ignore the original works as they're "boring".
                That only applies to the LotR movies though, I have a straight loathing for The Hobbit movies as it just had to meddle way too fricking much with the original work as if to say it couldn't stand on it's own merits.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Have you watched the Tolkien Edit of The Hobbit? I downloaded it years ago but have yet to watch it. It supposedly cuts out all the original or extra-narrative stuff and trims the entire trilogy down to ~4.5 hours.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                The third hobbit movie was just a big ass cg warcraft cutscene and legolas doing nothing personnel anime bullshit

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Everyone in the theater audibly sighed at that moment
                Some guy next to let a "bullshit" out

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I knew the Hobbit movies were gonna be bad when the first released screengrabs showed Thorin, Fili and Kili looking more like short humans instead of Tolkien inspired dwarves with the makeup, heads and beards.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I'm still pissed off that they cut out virtually all the events of Mirkwood to shoehorn a stupid love triangle

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                purease understand leading man must be hot

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Bilbos the leading man though.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          The lotr books are worth reading for sure. The Silmarillion is also more than just background lore, it has a few really strong stories like feanor's and the story of Beren and Luthien

          ALL self inserts should be killed

          Tolkien's self insert would most likely be Beren, considering he has the character's name carved on his gravestone. Beren and Luthien is such a sweet story about a human risking his life to earn the blessing of Thingol, father of the elf maiden, Luthien. Some of his best, most personal writing, easily peak middle earth. Don't listen to anons saying silmarillion is 100% lore, although there is a whole lot of that.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >The lotr books are worth reading for sure
            Nah. The movies, yeah. But the books, no way.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Peter Jackson's "The Two Towers" is a crime against humanity. Nobody should ever watch it, fans of the books or otherwise. The Fellowship of the Ring is the only film that was legitimately better than the book, but even that's debatable, considering how much needed to be cut.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I like the movies, but honestly gollum ruins them for me. I don’t have to fricking look at him in the books.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              The books rock. They start incredibly slow, but thats part of the joy of it. They are peak, long, winding, comfy fireside stories. You need to start them by just enjoying the ritual of reading it. Brew a cup of tea, sit next to the window on a sunny day. Enjoying the act of reading itself is essential to get through the first half of fellowship as it is incredibly slow paced. Once I got to the first chapter in mordor, the intense contrast hit me like a ton of bricks. He spends pages describing how agonizing it is just to be there and how the only thing keeping frodo and sam alive is memories of those first chapters in hobbiton that seemed so boring at the time. And all of that is happening while the world is basically ending in minas tirith. The slow pacing on the front end sets up this theme of not taking peaceful times for granted really well. Such a masterpiece.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I thought the LOTR films were good fun but couldn't stomach the books. I just don't care about troop movements, genealogies of tangential characters, and bad poetry/songs that make zero sense in the context of the story. I give a ton of credit to Tolkien for all the effort he put in, but his actual writing is dry as the Sahara. When I read fantasy, I want a rouse adventure. If I want a history book, I'll read a history book

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            That's a whole lot of slop. Don't tell me you actually read everything listed here?

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              I did

              I don't have a meme image of a disgusted dog or other animal that would suffice for my utter hatred of you and your bait at this point in time.

              It's not bait it's really how I feel

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I don't have a meme image of a disgusted dog or other animal that would suffice for my utter hatred of you and your bait at this point in time.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >history book
            You should read the silmarilian. That shit puts me sound asleep when I listen to it on audiobook. And yeah, I appreciate the effort, but I don’t care to read all the fricking songs he writes.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            The only valid complaint here is the poetry, Tolkien barely describes the battles and the genealogies are in the appendix. You sure you didn't try reading the Sillmarilion?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >If I want a history book, I'll read a history book
            I don't disagree. I'm writing my own pseudo-fantasy novel, and one of the things I've been extremely conscious of is not going on long tirades about the world, the politics, etc. except when absolutely necessary. LotR just holds a special place in my heart because I grew up with it.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              i dont think its bad to have lore and a world existting outside of the story,
              but show don't tell.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Jesus christ anon

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >hasn't even read the best Star Wars series, X-Wing
            Absolutely exposed

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >S+: A wienery diplomat with a black belt in sarcasm. A sociopath scientist with a fondness for shooting her bunkmates. A smart-ass techwiz with the galaxy’s biggest chip on his shoulder. An alien warrior with anger management issues. A tomboy pilot who’s totally not into him, in case you were wondering
            lol

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              The Aurora Cycle is my favorite book series ever. Don't knock it till you try it.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                embarrassing.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Holy midwit. They never should have taught you to read.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Try the Blood of Kerensky trilogy. It's battletech, it's great, and it's by Stackpole who also wrote part of the X-Wing series.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Thrawn series is good but Heir to the Empire is bad
            Fricking what c**t?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            you are the literal definition of a pseud
            I bet you get angry and argue about and compare marvelslop and starshit

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              I don't argue or get angry I just enjoy the stuff

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                And mcu

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            My favorite book of all time is needful things by Stephen King. I've only read it once, many many years ago but it was the first book that completely captured me and nothing will beat that one reading.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >all that Star Wars and Halo slop in the top tiers

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            insane tier list aside:

            >i just dont care about troop movements

            are you a LIAR sir?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Supreme bait, look at all those (You)s, not bad. Shame that half of them think you're being completely serious, really says something about the state of Ganker.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            you would've been killed in the middle ages

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Bubonic Plague would have gotten him, 'cause only rats have taste that bad.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            You'd probably enjoy Jack Vance. He's kind of the opposite of Tolkien when it comes to worldbuilding. His stories move at a brisk pace.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Very interesting to keep a list of books you've read and share with people. I'd do the same but I haven't read that many books.

            So many people don't like the Kilo Five trilogy, tbh for a long time I didn't get it, but overtime i've started to dislike some of it. I'd personally rank Glasslands a B, Mortal Dictata a C+, and the Thursday war either a D or C-.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >bane trilogy
            >halo
            >fricking phasma
            >S+ tier
            >bane trilogy above thrawn
            >any SW books higher than hobbit and soiaf

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        it took me 20 years to have the willpower to read the silmarillion
        its actually fantastic
        but its quite a harsh tone shift into the mythical if you've come from hobbit and lotr

        its extraordinary that the tolkmeister wanted to have the silmarillion included with the OG release of the LOTR.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The LOTR books are the peak.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Read the books before the movies so you can notice all the shit they changed/ruined to add more "kino" as you kids call it.

        I just watched it, but I'll put the books on my backlog.

        Amazon series is basically raping Tolkien's corpse, pretend it doesn't exist.

        Yeah thought as much.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Read the books before the movies so you can notice all the shit they changed/ruined to add more "kino" as you kids call it.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Read "Turin Turambar" if you can find it. It's the bleakest thing Tolkien ever wrote and is pure, unadulterated kino.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I'll put it in my backlog as well.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Turin Turambar
        Are you talking about Children of Hurin?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          That's the larger story, yeah. I might be mistaken, but Turin Turambar was what was in Unfinished Tales and focuses specifically on his character.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Yeah I'll have to see if there's anymore, that book was absolute kino like you said. Really messed up, surprised it was even from Tolkien.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          That's the larger story, yeah. I might be mistaken, but Turin Turambar was what was in Unfinished Tales and focuses specifically on his character.

          Do I read Turin turambar or the children of hurin?
          Or is it part of the same book?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I just read Children of Hurin which is a self contained story from what I understand, earlier on in Middle Earth history. Other poster will probably know more.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I recommend the audiobooks as an option because the reader really has a soulful voice singing the songs.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >audiobooks
        Never did any of those. Wich one should i get?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >anon was visited by the Unavoidable Tolkien Fairy after avoiding his books for decades
      many such cases

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Personally, I do think Hobbit was the peak.
      But LOTR is great too.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      LOTR is something beyond measure.
      The Hobbit is good, but it just doesn't compare.
      The Silmarillon is Tolkien's internal lore libraries curated by Tolkien Jr. into an anthology. It simply isn't as good because it was never intended for publication.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Then just enjoy lotr and ignore the rest.
        Why care about any of the new stuff coming out if you didn't even enjoy everything the man himself written?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          ironic illiterate anon reply

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I'm ESL, should I read LotR now or get used to more "lower level" literature before it? I've read mostly non-fiction or YA shit or Harlan Ellison's short stories

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Give it a try, but I would say most of the vocabulary you might learn from it will be pretty useless. For example, Tolkien uses the FRICK out of the world tumult. But try it out and see how it goes, they’re really great books.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        As a fellow writer, "tumult" (and, by extension, "tumultuous") is a good word. Don't discourage people from expanding their vocabularies.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >tumultuous
          Is that really such an odd word? I've seen it here and there in books

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            It's not an odd word at all. That's my point.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              It’s not odd, but I was telling an ESL that there are a shit ton of vocabulary in those books that he won’t find useful. I was reading the count of montecristo in Japanese and every other word my wife was telling me “that’s stupid, nobody uses that word.” I’m just letting him know that as an ESL he should be careful about the vocab he prioritizes.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Totally fair. There's a pretty big difference between literary language and conversational language.

                [...]
                Do I read Turin turambar or the children of hurin?
                Or is it part of the same book?

                Same thing. I think Children of Hurin has a bit more to it, but I might be wrong. Turin is the important character in any case. It's a completely separate story from LotR, taking place before Sauron and the One Ring are a thing. It's absurdly dark for Tolkien. If you like tragedies, it's genuinely one of the best I've ever read.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The Hobbit is a children's book and pretty readable especially if you've played any fantasy games on English. Harry Potter is also a good standard series for second languages.

      ?si=jWwC2PpT1THSVakg

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Isn't there a translated version in whatever the frick you speak?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Why would you read a translation when you could read the work in its original language?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >wanting to read a fanfic instead of the actual text
        I get it. I've written a fanfic. But it's a different experience.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Movies > books simply because they completly ignored this character.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      But it's the best character

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I’ve always agreed with that. The movies would have to tone Tom the frick down to fit with the story. He really is jarring and out of place. Then of course everyone who didn’t read the books would be asking “why the frick didn’t Tom just carry the ring?”

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Then of course everyone who didn’t read the books would be asking “why the frick didn’t Tom just carry the ring?”
        It's funny how the books set that up and then right away at Rivendell cut off the people who ask that question saying "yeah Tom uh...doesn't think like people do. He'd probably just lose the thing and then we'd be back to square one"

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >everyone who didn’t read the books would be asking “why the frick didn’t Tom just carry the ring?”
        bombadil only has time to frolick in the woods, talk shit at the trees, and frick goldberry
        that's why

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    ahti

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    movies-only gays begone
    this is a books-enjoyer thread

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      He could never do that because not giving a frick is the source of his power.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Reminder that Gandalf is literally forbidden from trying to solve the problem himself because the last time the gods let the Maiar be completely unfettered they fricking devastated a continent, so they want to make sure that never happens again.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Bore of the Rings

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Also a question.
    Does the books ever go into detail what the one ring does?
    Boromir kept mentioning how they could use it against Sauron and other characters kept mentioning it would give them unlimited power, but all frodo and bilbo realy do with it is turn invisible.
    Also is fate an actual thing in the world?
    Was it fate that the ring fell into the hands of the ome dude that is seemingly resistant to it's addictiveness?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Does the books ever go into detail what the one ring does?
      It allows one to impose their will over others through the strength of Sauron's malice. But eventually you'll be corrupted by it.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yes, it’s revealed when Sam wears the ring to safe Frodo. Frodo is timid and friendly, so it turns him invisible; he’s a hobbit. But when sam uses it, it turns him into a fearless monster. The will of the user determines what it does.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It turned Sam invisible, too. That's how he was able to follow the orcs (carrying Frodo's body) into Mordor without them noticing.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It only gives Sauron power. The only thing the ring does to other people is tempting them into putting it on, which is why it gives small perks like invisibility so people can say it can give them power.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Most of Sauron's power is in the ring as he foolishly decided to imbue it with such when he created it as it amplified his abilities far beyond what he was capable of naturally as in his hubris he never thought he could actually lose it.
      It's most basic low level ability is to turn people invisible (as it's actually pulling them into an in-between space between the normal world and the spirit world) as most people who handled it have no idea of it's true power or how to access it (or want to after it's true nature is discovered). The ring is also semi-sentient and tries to return to it's true owner by manipulating people into either fighting over it or trying to lay claim to it so it will eventually end up back in Sauron's proximity where he would reclaim it. It's chance to escape the dead end of being stuck with Gollum unfortunately ended up with it in the hands of Bilbo Baggins and the Hobbits who are not only naturally resilient (but not immune) to it's corruption but Bilbo, Frodo and especially Samwise in particular don't have any lofty ambitions or desire to lord over others that the ring can corrupt and tempt with.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The possessive form of "it" is "its", no apostrophe.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Sure thing Poindexter.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Don't shoot the messenger. I can't force you to learn.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              You're getting a swirly after class nerd.

        • 1 month ago
          fags are gay

          and jmmediately kill youre self in an excruciatingly painful and slow manner irregardlessly

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Shit's all answered explicitly in the books, my man. Gandalf tells Frodo that the ring could be used as a weapon but Frodo didn't have the will to do so and never tried. Besides which it also did more than just turn them invisible. Bilbo lived far longer than he otherwise would have, Frodo was able to perceive spirits, Sam was able to understand orc language.

      Fate is explicitly also real in the setting, yes. As everything is intended by the creator god, which is basically God. It's possible that the events of The Lord of the Rings were intended specifically by the Valar and that's why they had the wizards sent to Middle Earth, but that isn't specifically stated.

      And yes.

      Yes, it’s revealed when Sam wears the ring to safe Frodo. Frodo is timid and friendly, so it turns him invisible; he’s a hobbit. But when sam uses it, it turns him into a fearless monster. The will of the user determines what it does.

      No, it makes Sam appear like a scary warrior to an orc. And he only acts so bravely out of love for Frodo.

      It only gives Sauron power. The only thing the ring does to other people is tempting them into putting it on, which is why it gives small perks like invisibility so people can say it can give them power.

      No, anyone can use its power. Although it would take a very strong will to actually utilize it without being overcome by it.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >No, it makes Sam appear like a scary warrior to an orc
        In that scene from Sam’s perspective he feels giant and unstoppable, and he terrifies the orcs. There’s nothing in the text to suggest it’s only an illusion. The ring is a weapon.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >His will was too weak and slow to restrain his hand. It dragged at the chain and clutched the Ring. But Sam did not put it on; for even as he clasped it to his breast, an orc came clattering down. Leaping out of a dark opening at the right, it ran towards him. It was no more than six paces from him when, lifting its head, it saw him; and Sam could hear its gasping breath and see the glare in its bloodshot eyes. It stopped short aghast. For what it saw was not a small frightened hobbit trying to hold a steady sword: it saw a great silent shape, cloaked in a grey shadow, looming against the wavering light behind; in one hand it held a sword, the very light of which was a bitter pain, the other was clutched at its breast, but held concealed some nameless menace of power and doom.
          That's just your headcanon.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The powers granted are a reflection of the user's current mental state. Frodo is meek, so it usually makes him invisible. It gives Sam an intimidation illusion at one point, because he's desperate to protect Frodo from orcs at that moment. At Amon Hen, Frodo gets a farsight ability when wearing the ring to escape boromir and can see troops preparing for war at different locations, miles away in every direction. It gave Bilbo supernatural youth for decades.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >people on both sides of it saying the movies are nothing like the books
    Nah, they are, the movies just have more action in them. Go read Dune and realize why people called it unfilmable for so long, because no film has really adapted what it's like.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      this is the only thing the dune film ever got right

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Still thought the Dune movie was better than it had a right to be. I liked how they portrayed THE VOICE and the choreography they used to show how shields work was cool.

      Didn't capture the weirdness of the internal monologues and the interplay, but frick, what could.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Dune is the bext. The latest movie felt like an empty shell of sorts, they got the story moments but left almost everything unexplained. A full film is probably impossile for Dune, perhaps they could've made it a long series instead

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      what? are you insinuating there's something wrong with the Lynch version?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >shadman

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Saw the new movie and thought it was boring capeshit slop with babby's first political conflict, actually fell asleep on it twice. Not sure what the franchises's fans thought of it but it seemed more like a fricking discovery channel montage of sand than anything coherent.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I didn't like it that much. The best part was the Sardaukar's planet and some of the costume designs were awesome. Ending on the duel with Jamis was so stupid. Jamis is only in the movie for like fifteen minutes. The second movie is gonna start with Paul rolling up to the fremen camp and immediately getting rizzed up by the widow of a guy that was barely in the last movie. It will be so confusing for non book readers and I can't imagine them adding a flashback to prevent that without shattering the already dogshit pacing. Mommy Jessica was great though

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      why is the god emperor of dune cover just a giant black wiener? I read the first one. it was fine. glad I never kept going.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        why do Americans only ever think about black penis this much
        it's scary

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Hey dol! Merry dol!
    Upon these lands you'll pay no toll!
    So go on! Rest! Relax!
    For on Tom's land there is no Tax!

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The idea of extremely powerful people who don't use their powers unless someone fricks with them, basically just doing there own thing and wanting to be left alone is kino as frick.

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Best vidya for a LOTR 'feel'?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >let's take a big fat steaming shit over the original work: the video game

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        they fricked up so bad with this. I was super hyped for it too.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          At LEAST we can say the original is good and the gameplay and graphics have aged well

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The legacy of this game is gatekeeping the rest of the industry from it's cool nemesis mechanic

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >reminder
          FRICK, I JUST WANT MORE GAMES WITH THE NEMESIS SYSTEM

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Its a pretty mind blowing feature. Supposedly the wonder woman game will have it, but I would like to see it in an original capeshit ip like infamous or something. Would be cool to have a endless, procedurally generated rogues gallery of goofy masked dorks that shit talk you everytime you frick up. I just don't see that working with wonder woman. If it goes even half as hard as the lotr games people will start screeching about violence against women.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Supposedly the wonder woman game will have it
            Will it ever be in a game that people play, though?

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              If they can't make a Superman game, no fricking way they can make a WW one

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Wind Waker was a great game.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Was it? Was it really anon? Or did you got so distracted by the sailing saying that you overlooked its flaws?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >did you got
                I want to dismiss your post for this error alone, but then you said...
                >you overlooked its flaws?
                ...using the correct form of "its". I can rightfully assume that you simply neglected to hit the apostrophe and didn't even know what you were typing was correct, but I want to give the benefit of the doubt. To answer your question, yes, it's mostly nostalgia, but I still think it's a good game.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                No need to overthinking it, it was just a shitpost that I thought about quickly and then changed halfway, it was gonna be
                >Or did you spend so much time sailing
                Before becoming "were you so distracted" or something to that effect
                I've never even played Wind Waker, everyone I knew had a PS2

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Regardless, you got a basic schooling in English grammar. If you learned something from that, it wasn't a post wasted.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                But I already know all the englishes

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous
              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >But I already know all the englishes
                gollum gollum

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I always figured a WW game would be easier because alot of her gimmicks and weaknesses could be better suited for a game. Shes Greek and uses weapons so people could immediately toss in some familiarity with God of War (not Nu Gow), She can be hurt by bullets so she needs to deflect them.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Nah, WW is the least defined of the Big Three but she's been in the major league for some time, she's as durable and strong as Superman depending on the story, she's invulnerable to bullets and most weapon and lacks an obvious explorative weakness

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Shes had a weakness to piercing weaponry for years you meme spouting secondary.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >weakness to piercing weaponry for years
                That doesn't make any sense, at fast enough speeds, blunt force becomes piercing
                Also, how many years?
                >you meme spouting secondary.
                That's true though, I've never read a solo WW comic

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >lacks an obvious explorative weakness
                Doesn't she lose all her powers if she gets tied with a rope because the original author had a bondage fetish?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I don't think you understand how capeshit works. The powers of the relevant characters are directly related to the writer's fetishes.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                That's been gone for years

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Behead an Orc
            >he comes back with neck stitching and wearing an iron collar
            I forgot how much I loved this shit

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              It's great in concept but it was frustrating at times me because of how the combat worked
              Some types coupled with some resistances were unbearable

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >reminder
          FRICK, I JUST WANT MORE GAMES WITH THE NEMESIS SYSTEM

          Can I get a qrd?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            They patented a system where minibosses can come back with dialogue and change depending on your actions = recruit, shame and kill. they can also betray you if you picked the first onje and each thing that happens can increase or lower their level.
            >captha: vKKKnr

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              That's a fricking terrible explanation.

              [...]
              Can I get a qrd?

              The enemy faction in the game has a dynamic hierarchy of lieutenants. A big part of the game is weakening their power structure by assassinating them (usually by sneaking or not into their warcamps, culminating in a boss fight mid-fracas when the main dude spots you).

              But those fights can end in different ways either by choice or dynamically (like the guy turning tail and escaping you rather than being killed).
              They might then have a grudge and hunt you later, even muscling in on a fight you're having with another boss. But now they're tougher, in also dynamic ways: a guy you tried to poison to death is now resistant to poison, etc.

              Some of them might come back repeatedly and turn into a genuine nemesis for the player, but it's always unpredictable and usually throws you when it happens.
              Even killing em ain't for certain; an ork might show up with his head sewn back on and really pissed off later.

              It's a cool idea and could have been adapted for a lot of games, so people are pissed they tried to patent it.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >was wuz gondorians n shieeeeeeeeet

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Pretty sure the black guy is literally from Rhun/Harad so at least its internally consistent, unlike the rest of it and Rings of Pooer

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            The scene where he tells Talion this is actually pretty funny
            He's sitting there talking and then goes
            >I'm not originally from Gondor
            And Talion just looks at him with a clear "no shit" expression
            Regardless, I used to be cool with the "minority is here but his presence is explained" thing, but Black person fatigue got me so bad not even those examples I can stand anymore

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Oh yeah, we're still on Ganker
        This game sucked. Too bloated and combat felt worse than the first entrance (which was already a lore rape tbh)
        I actually never finished it because in that part of the the story where you lose all of our fortress so you have to take them all back, I got so fricking sick of the grind and repetition I quit
        I later read somewhere that the game had micro transactions, and it was that grindy to force tou to buy things, but backlash was so huge they removed it
        Anyway, it sucked

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    I say "pseudo-fantasy" because it takes place on a proto-industrial world with none of the typical high-fantasy races, like Elves and Dwarves. Low-fantasy almost fits, but it's borderline sci-fi at times, so I really don't have a good way to classify it.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It's still fricking fantasy lad, the same way A Song of Ice and Fire is fantasy and the same way Dune is fantasy that swerves in and out with sci-fi

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, it's fantasy that relies on real-world history and science. Just calling it "fantasy" because it has "magic" is reductive and misses the point.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >uhh no, you see MY novel is based on real-life rules and history
          And? You think you're the only one to do that? It's fantasy. Get back to writing and stop shitposting on Ganker

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I never said that. I said that it doesn't cleanly fit under the label of "fantasy". There's a reason there are a dozen different classifications of fantasy (high fantasy, low fantasy, urban fantasy, contemporary fantasy, surreal fantasy, etc.). Not being sure how to categorize it has actually been a huge pain, because I don't know how to describe it in simple terms. If I just called it a fantasy novel, people would think, "Oh, like Lord of the Rings or Game of Thrones".

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I never said that. I said that it doesn't cleanly fit under the label of "fantasy". There's a reason there are a dozen different classifications of fantasy (high fantasy, low fantasy, urban fantasy, contemporary fantasy, surreal fantasy, etc.). Not being sure how to categorize it has actually been a huge pain, because I don't know how to describe it in simple terms. If I just called it a fantasy novel, people would think, "Oh, like Lord of the Rings or Game of Thrones".

            I was thinking about it, and the label I've used to describe it in the past is "science fantasy" or "hard fantasy". That still leaves a lot to be desired, but it's better than just generic "fantasy". It doesn't even come close to the agony I went through trying to categorize an anthology I published last year, though. That ranged from fantasy to sci-fi to supernatural fiction to literary fiction. I cannot for the life of me write pure genre fiction.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Dune is bretty frickin sci-fi when you look at the big picture, it just deals with psychic shit like the thu'um since Herbert wrote out any possibility for robot shit with the butlerian jihad. Soft sci-fi, to be sure, but Arrakis has a pretty well thought out, semi-scientifically plausible ecosystem.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Okay, it's a fantastical supernatural sci-fi character drama. Happy?

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Fair. 'The river was a raging mulch, like a farmer driving over a giant pile of cow shit and wood chips -- just, like, mulch everywhere. "Frick that," Dresdon said. "I'm not getting in that mulch." Dresdon hated mulch.'

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    how is he the most powerful character? if sauron got the ring back he would have subjugated tom just like everyone else. sure he is powerful but saying he's the most powerful is moronic and basically a reddit meme.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      1) Sauron is the ring
      2) the ring can't influence Tom B
      3) therefore Tom B is more powerful than Sauron

      additionally:
      >The origin and nature of Tom Bombadil are unknown; however, he claimed already existed before the Dark Lord came to Arda, signifying he may have been alive even before the coming of the Valar. (It is unclear whether he refers to Melkor's first or second entry into the world.) In any case, Tom is insinuated to have been the first living creature to inhabit Arda.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      he's not, he's simply an incorruptible forest spirit, while the ring would remain with him the ring would remain in limbo.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        that doesn't solve the problem it just kicks the can down the road. destroy the ring and sauron fricks off forever. arda benefitted immensely from sauron fricking off.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The problem is that the ring won't remain with him. Tom will eventually forget it is something important and either misplace it or might even simply give it away if an undercover agent of Sauron asks nicely for it as Tom Bombadil is on a different wavelength than the rest of the universe and simply can't make himself care about things like the Ring's importance. There's also the issue that Sauron might somehow still discover the Ring's location and decide to just drop any attempts at subtlety and go all out on taking it by force and that's probably a calamity n the making for everybody and thing caught in the middle

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          As I recall, Gandalf says that Tom would keep it for all of a week before throwing it out, not remembering or caring about its importance. It would just start its journey back to Sauron at that point.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Even Shelob is more powerful than Sauron.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        That's a bold claim. Without the ring, Sauron isn't particularly powerful, but he still commands extensive influence. The orcs specifically try not to frick with Shelob, but Sauron has the wraiths under his control. Even one ringwraith could frick Shelob up.

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Give it a try, but I would say most of the vocabulary you might learn from it will be pretty useless. For example, Tolkien uses the FRICK out of the world tumult. But try it out and see how it goes, they’re really great books.

    >used 8 times in a fricking 1,200 page book
    It's not that bad

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      It's not really a usage thing. I just think the word tumult itself is corny asf, along with the concept it's describing.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        frfr no cap, dat wurd be corny as a mf. ain't nevah in mah live seent sumin lyke dat.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          This discussion is getting mulchuous.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            lamo I get the reference

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          The more I think about it, the goofier tumult sounds. Like if a word could be reddit, out of every word in the english language, it would be tumult.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I think it would be either loquacious or pedantic

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              Lugubrious.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            reject tumult, accept tohuvabohu

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            tumult? more like tumut

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Nothingburger is the peak reddit word

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Gets one shotted, no diff, by Madara. Not even edo tensei, rinne rebirth or jyuubi Madara. I'm talkin skipping stones at the river with Hashirama, little kid Madara.

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i always thought it was neat how gandalf explains how tom wouldnt be a good candidate to keep the ring safe because despite being so powerful he's basically immune to its influence, the ring would be of so little consequence that he'd just misplace it somewhere

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    so why didn't they give the ring to him if he was so powerful?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Gandalf explicitly explained it at the Council of Elrond that Tom is too careless and would wind up losing the ring.

  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    this guys channel has some really good LOTR lore synopses

  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If he's do great, then why didnt he destroy the ring?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      he doesn't care
      too busy fricking his waifu

  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Reminder that WB is going to redo the books either as a Prime show or as new movies.

  27. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Any actual Tolkien connoiseurs in here can tell me how different Sindarin and Quenya are?

  28. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >previous game antagonist comes back as a saturday morning cartoon comedic relief """villain"""
    Is there anything more humillating for an otherwise strong foe?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >saturday morning cartoon
      why do you think that?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Honestly what was Saruman's end goal here? Did he just want to start a pipeweed cabal? Was this his "frick you" to the hobbits for taking Isengard from him?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Was this his "frick you" to the hobbits for taking Isengard from him?
        basically, its not like he really had much options either.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          He couldve gone and lived with the Hill Tribes and scratched a living off rocks

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            it wasn't his nature to do that though

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I think its more to contrast with Gandalf and Galadriel. Theres a few passages on the way back to Hobbiton before they part with the hobbits where those two are described as being sort of somber about the victory over Sauron, like they're happy middle earth is safe, but they're age is still coming to an end and their powers are waning, but they gracefully accept it. There's one bit where one of the hobbits catches Gandalf and Galadriel quietly discussing the future of the world during the return trip to the shire and it describes them as being like statues from a soon to be forgotten era or something like that. Meanwhile, you have Saruman who gracelessly clings to whatever meager power he can find.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          So what happens to Saruman's Maiar form when it respawns in the Halls of Mandos/Valinor? The Valar are notoriously inept at punished wrongdoers.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >this butthole almost ruined the whole world
            >well, let's just banish him there
            They really fricked up with Melkor. Maybe they learned their lesson.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            He rejected reformation twice now, if anything his spirit is like alot of the other evil characters, wailing and doing nothing of general importance to anybody now for all eternity.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              I like that Radagast is explicitly one of those "he fricked up and failed miserably" characters. He just lives in the woods and does nothing important forever. Such is the fate of all hippies.

  29. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    so what was he actually? a vala or maia? some sort of nature spirit? a being created before Melkor introduced discord? the physical embodiment of ainulindale?

  30. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >joke character is also the most powerful by far
    >true neutral alignment

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Canonically weaker than Jyggalag. He would also get mogged by Sithis

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        So this does not have a will, it's not a conscious being

  31. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Before him were the bones of a mighty man. He had been clad in mail, and still his harness lay there whole; for the cavern’s air was as dry as dust, and his hauberk was gilded. His belt was of gold and garnets, and rich with gold was the helm upon his bony head face downward on the floor. He had fallen near the far wall of the cave, as now could be seen, and before him stood a stony door closed fast: his finger-bones were still clawing at the cracks. A notched and broken sword lay by him, as if he had hewn at the rock in his last despair.

  32. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Saruman loses himself to pride and abandons his duty
    >gives up the White Wizard role
    >rebrands himself as "Saruman the Many-Coloured", complete with a rainbow robe
    Tolkien was ahead of his time.

  33. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >joke character is the strongest
    >fricking hates the player's guts
    >even gets a boss fight

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >hates the player specifically, not the player character
      >despite having meta-awareness, still sucks ass as a boss fight

  34. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    brandon sanderson is reddit
    tolkien is wikipedia
    GRRM is discord
    gene wolfe is Ganker

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Gene Wolfe shares it with Dan Simmons and his cyborg fairy daughter wife

  35. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I keep confusing cirith ungol with minas ithil / minas morgul

  36. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    You gotta be powerful to be a true fencesitter. SMT already proved this by making the Neutral Endings the one where you slaughterfrick all sides.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Don't most SMT games canonically end with either Law or Chaos winning?

  37. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Is LOTR just doomed as an IP? The Estate doesn't care, The Hobbit movies were prequel tier, the new games suck more dick than OP, the new media is being made by a corporate fricker who wants Galadriel to be a capeshit hero and black dwarves and so on.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Only 20 years until it's in the public domain (already is in new zealand). Doesn't matter much at this point.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Is LOTR just doomed as an IP?
      People just need to let IPs die.
      The man has been dead for nearly half a decade how much new shit do you want to squeeze out of it anyway?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, Disney and it's constant bribes fricking turned the thing into a farce
        It used to be 28 years, and Congress turned into 70 or 120 depending on the work
        It should be author's death+30 years at most, it's a safeguard to his children, not a perpetual cow for unknown relatives to milk forever

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I am not talking about companies, but consumers.
          Yeah ofcourse it's shitty that companies are running ips into the ground, but it really stops being a problem if you just stop engaging with the new shit it puts out.
          They might make quadrillion sequels, but why would I give a shit if I never plan to read them especislly when the original author has no hand in it

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Nobody wants to let franchises and the identities and memories associated with those franchises go. Even Ganker is like this, if this entire site somehow went down, despite all the years of misery and stupidity, people would be lost. They have devoted too much time and memories to things like anime, Star Wars, capeshit, memes, Tiktok. The issue just boils down to human identity and tribalism, unless that somehow got rewritten its never gonna change.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              I understand and I am also guilty of it, but for myself I just started to learn to let shit go and I am happier for it and I would urge others to do the same.
              Though I am sounding pretty dramatic by saying I am happier for it, but you get the gist.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Yeah, I don't understand consoomer mentality either.
            It's fine when you're young and stupid, but I don't understand having a slavish devotion to a franchise, a brand. Specially when it's getting deturpated and plundered.
            I'm happy that I have some things which aren't popular enough to have a film or series adaption or even a wiki, not because I dislike popularity itself but because popularity brings with it the common denominator

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >I'm happy that I have some things which aren't popular enough to have a film or series adaption or even a wiki, not because I dislike popularity itself but because popularity brings with it the common denominator
              I don't even care about that.
              I like avatar tla for example, but I enjoyed nothing that they made with the ip since it ended so I'll just keep occassionally enjoy the original series and keep it at that while basicallly ignoring korra, the comics or whatever.
              Don't care either how people engage with it beyond that.

  38. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Did it filter you, Ganker?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Yes. I couldn't get even far from 50% of the book. I get why maybe someone could like it, but it's not for me.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        No idea which audiobook he is talking about, but Robert Inglis as narrator is the most popular one I believe.

        Some of the poetry gets a bit much, especially the elven ones, but it was a bit much in the books too.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I searched for lotr audiobook in my favourite russian store and that's the only one i found. I will listen to him to improve my english hearing

  39. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Since I know the only people in this thread are fantasy nerds, my anthology is free this week. I'd appreciate it if you read it and left a really scathing review.
    https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CM929YVT

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I know, you're going to tell me to buy an ad. As if you homosexuals ever fall for those.

      I'm not promoting this book to make money. I've lost several hundred dollars on it already. I certainly don't make money when people download it for free. But I don't care. I write stories hoping they'll connect with someone, not hoping they'll sell. I think there are buttholes in this thread who would really enjoy what I've written, so this is targeted at them, hoping they're not so contrarian that they'll refuse a free download.

      That's all.

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