Peasant Thread

Do you think this random peasant could take you in a fight? Also Peasant Thread.

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Probably not.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      But he spends all his time farming the land and doing manual labour. Surely he would kick your ass.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        I read 'do you think you could take this random peasant in a fight,' because my brain was installed sideways.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        I have grown up eating nutrients and am 6'5". That man is 5 heads tall. He must be around 4'8".

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Your "nutrients" are microplastics and shitty processed food. This man will casually turn you into fertilizer

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            >he doesn’t know
            Malnourished farmers have shit nutrition. There’s a reason why our average height is only just now recovering to pre-agriculture levels.

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              Which is why it's all the more humorous you'd still get your ass beat by a manlet, even on his fast day.

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              In a legit streetfight with a medieval Peasant and a Redditor, my money is on the peasant over the Redditor. However, they'd lose against just about anyone else.

  2. 1 year ago
    Smaugchad

    Well consisting every pitchfork I've ever seen is like 5 or 6 feet long at the longest, he might be a halfling. Certainly a manlet.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Guess it's a Shrek length pitchfork lol

      • 1 year ago
        Smaugchad

        They were taller in the middle ages.

        >tfw the pitchfork scale reveals Shrek is only like 6'1"
        >Common people are 5 foot manlets
        >Farquaad is a 3 foot tall circus freak

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      They were taller in the middle ages.

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    With or without the chad length pitchfork?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Does that change the outcome?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        I would consider myself less likely to win if he had the prong stick than if he didn't.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Even without it, he's probably pretty strong from working the land doing manual labour everyday.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            It is true. I work behind a desk all day, he likely is much physically stronger than I am. Frankly if I had to bed I would put my money on the shit farmer. Despite that, with no pitchfork it would at least be a fair fight. Might not be favored but at least I'm in with a shot. With the pitchfork I think I'm out.

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              If he gets the pitchfork I get a pistol. Only fair that we get to use readily available weapons of our time period, right?

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Pitchfork is primarily a tool, not a weapon, so you too get era-appropriate tool of choice. I'd recommend forklift.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                Roll up in my combine harvester and see how he fairs.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                I'm not sure about this. There is only a finite amount of people in the past that had less advanced weapons then I have today, but a potential infinite amount of time in the future where there are people with more advanced weapons.
                If we are doing time-travel cage fights then I would prefer tech stays out of it, or there is a very good chance the next guy in the ring has a nuclear ray pistol or some shit like that.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                And in that case we’re fricked. We don’t have to win every fight, but we do get to win this one.

              • 1 year ago
                Anonymous

                I mean is it a fight to the death or do we just need to rough some guy up?
                Personally I would rather not have to run over a medieval peasant with a combine harvester if that was avoidable.

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    He's got the high ground. He's already won.

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    That's either tiny dude or a fricking gigantic pitchfork.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Forget the pichfork, what about those houses? If you look at the scale of the field (blades of grass by his feet as large as flowers right next to the house) he can't be more than dozen yards from them so it can't be trick of perspective.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        the house is in a dip and he's on a rise - notice the grass seems to cut off suddenly right behind him and then again a short distance back
        the perspective is a little fricky but he's definitely closer to the "camera" than he initially seems

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    go frick yourself puck

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Say what you want about puckee21 at least he commissions art from actual artists and doesn’t post so shit

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    he probably could, I'm kinda fat, but I have no quarrel with this man
    not sure if a blacksmith always counts as a peasant in RPG terms, since he's probably a guildsman of some kind in many societies but I can't be fricked to scroll through my entire folder looking for peasants

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    No. He is stunted, physically and mentally.

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Give me a pitchfork and i'll probably win unless he's master Lingen who served in the Italian Wars as a lent sword and only retired to this peaceful village to farm in tranquillity or something

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      > Pitchfork duel
      > I CUT MY OWN PATH
      > YOU FOLLOWED YOUR WRATH
      > BUT MAYBE WE'RE BOTH THE SAMMMEEEEE

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Maybe, probably not, I'm in passable shape, decently tall and broad but I'm neither an experienced fist-fighter or a HEMA gay so he could always beat me.

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous.

    Probably.
    >Hard farmer motherfricker who wrastled with his brothers when they were young and has steel corded muscles vs me who trains to fight and who's entire skeletal muscle system is now fast twich for maximum speed and explosiveness.
    Pitchfork is scary, but if I can get passed it, it's tying him up more then me.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      If weapons are allowed just shoot him. Trying to beat the shit out of someone who's carrying a polearm is basically asking to be stabbed.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >I'll win because my speed is superior

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Fast twitch muscles are a real thing. Literally every martial art will have you train for explosiveness. It’s the difference between a sprinter and a long-distance runner.

        The reason why
        >I’m sure to win because my speed is superior
        Is a meme, is because more muscles = more speed = more power (generally). Though, being a gigaroided powershitter is not a great physique for fighting, as you’ll gas out in about 30 seconds (not to mention flexibility). Lean and muscular is the best.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      You realize if you can “get past it” you have to actually then beat him in hand to hand? moron

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  18. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    With pitchfork? yeah hed frick me up
    Without? That pitchfork is either longer than modern normal and we are closer in height, or i am taller than him, I work warehouse and I practice boxing and judo, he won't do too well. I am probably more nourished than him as well

  19. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    North Korean fight scene about a Korean Bandit who rose up an army to defeat multiple armies in battle.

  20. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Good people, things will never go well so long as goods be not in common, and so long as there be peasants and gentlemen. By what right are they whom we call lords greater folk than we? On what grounds have they deserved it? Why do they hold us in sergaye? If we all were made by the same gods, how can they say or prove that they are better than we, if it be not that they make us gain for them by our toil what they spend in their pride? They are clothed in velvet and warm in their furs and their ermines, while we are covered with rags. They have wine and spices and fir bread; and we oat-cake and straw, and water to drink. They have leisure and fine houses; we have pain and labour, the rain and the wind in the fields. And yet it is of us and of our toil that these men hold their state.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Dumb frick, these have served us for generations. Would you rather take some oligarchs who has no ties or tradition related to you? Who would displace for the sake of profit? We all have part to play: we farm gods greens and they farm men for the good of all.

  21. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Barehanded? frick no peasants are strong as hell

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      If peasants are strong as hell, why do they serve the nobles and bow to them when they walk by?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Nobles were also strong as hell spending their days training, in tournies or hunting.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          They were also trained

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        In addition to what the other guy said, not only is the nobility probably better fed, they are better armed, and trained to fight, and kill, as individuals, and in groups, to consider logistics, and to anticipate the strategic plays of an enemy.

        A small body of armed, trained people, has always been able to dominate a larger body of unarmed, untrained people.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          > Local Lord finally meets his match, some farmer dude

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Exactly, peasants were strong because of manual labour, nobles are strong and specifically trained to fight, The daily life of a regular knight was insanely intense physically. Those dudes must have been the equivalent of modern special ops soldiers in terms of phyisical condition and fighting ability.

  22. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >glass window
    >metal pitchfork
    >no colors on clothes
    not only is this an insanely wealthy peasant but he is humble too!
    Admirable!

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >>no colors on clothes
      you mean besides the blue jeans?

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      The painting is of a 21t century man who rejects colored clothing and using machine tools for religious reasons.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      He just works there. Groundskeeper for a wealthy family of minor gentry or something.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      The painting is of a 21t century man who rejects colored clothing and using machine tools for religious reasons.

      So he's just Amish then?

  23. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    We'd be pretty even, I think.

  24. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Do I get to keep my shit? Like my clothes, or purse? Does the shotgun on my back come? If it doesn't and I have my purse then the pistol I keep in there should do me nice.
    If it's any sort of melee I use.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      If you're wearing a purse, I doubt you can do much in a fight.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        I know you are moronic but a gun hurts the same no matter who pulls the trigger.

        Do I get to keep my shit? Like my clothes, or purse? Does the shotgun on my back come? If it doesn't and I have my purse then the pistol I keep in there should do me nice.
        If it's any sort of melee I use.

        >If it's any sort of melee I use.
        How did I type use instead of lose.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          Guns don't kill people. Bullets do. But it doesn't matter because by the time you finish digging through your beauty products and whatever other trinkes you keep in there the simple man with a simple tool will have aleady won the engagement.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            How big do you think a purse is anon. It's in it's own easy access pocket, I own the gun with the intent of self defense anon.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          >I know you are moronic but a gun hurts the same no matter who pulls the trigger.
          Wrong. I have Weapon Specialization (gun) which adds 2 to the damage roll.

  25. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Let's see here...
    >by the size of the pitchfork, the peasant is 4'8-4'10, maybe 120-130lb to my 5'8 220lb
    >he's a medieval farmer so he's probably wiry and can handle himself in a fight, and is almost certainly used to fighting bigger men
    >I'm an obese asthmatic myopic autist with a dull sense of pain and a poor temper, who hasn't been in a fight since high-school six years ago
    I can shoot a can off of a tree stump at 100 yards without a scope 9/10 times but that doesn't mean anything in hand-to-hand combat. Unless I can somehow grapple him with my weight "advantage" and gouge an eye or some shit in the first two minutes, he'll outlast me and knock me out. Might kick out my knee or crush my head with a rock. I'm not exactly a prime combatant but I hope to change that while I'm still young. Already lost 30lb changing my diet and am working out, but my lungs keep shutting down on me after a few minutes. Anytime people say they don't want gene-edited fetuses, it drives me wild. Most of my genes came out of a sewer. Crazy thing is my younger brother's an athletic chad quarterback with 130IQ and perfect eyesight. Same parents, same source, he just had a better roll of the dice. Don't resent him for it, is what it is. Peasant would probably kick my ass.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Medieval Pitchforks were just longer than regular pitchforks

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      You need more confidence anon

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      You just rolled up a more interesting character is all. Besides, at higher levels starting attributes don't matter as much. I believe in you anon!

  26. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    >Do you think this random peasant could take you in a fight?
    Sure why not.

  27. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  28. 1 year ago
    Anonymous
  29. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd give it a shot.

  30. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    He has a piercing reach weapon and I'm currently naked, so probably. My only hope would be aggressively hip thrusting at him to cause him to avert his eyes.

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