What VTM clan do you think you'd be in real life?

What VTM clan do you think you'd be in real life?

  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    FUCK VAMPIRES

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Vampire Hunter
      can't wait to join the catholic church and kill all of them and free the wrold from Living AIDS.

      TOTAL VAMPIRE DEATH
      also the vampire hunters are the Ganker faction against the reddit vampires

      Le smug contrarians get the rope

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >AIDSfag

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      If they look like VV? Gladly.

  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Vampire Hunter
    can't wait to join the catholic church and kill all of them and free the wrold from Living AIDS.

    TOTAL VAMPIRE DEATH
    also the vampire hunters are the Ganker faction against the reddit vampires

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >anti social and cantankerous dickhead
    >rarely shave
    >dress like a deranged homeless man

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Nosferatu or Gangrel, ultimate NEET clans

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Are gangrel NEETs? Seems like they would work some shitty job like as an overnight truck driver or something.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Innawoods furries in denial.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          City gangrel aren't innawoods though.
          Some kind of solitary job like security guard or whatever.

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    i am not here

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'm an artfag so Toreador.

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    MALK GANG

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Basement dwelling nerd who has a horrible sense of humor and hates being around people
    Probably Nosferatu.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Nosferatu typically embrace attractive people as a joke.

      It’s rare to be unironically embraced cause you vibe with them.

      Most of us would be Bruha, Gangnal and Trimere, or Malk

      Very few would be Venture even fewer would be nos

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Trimere
        Ganker and Ganker would be.
        We would be whatever is the most pants on head retarded.
        Probably caitiff in the Sabbat.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Okay, so probably Tremere since I'm also a self righteous book worm who hates sunlight

  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The lore for vtm is retarded, how do they explain any of this?
    >why aren't all vamps really wealthy like ventrue? Just put your money into savings accounts and pay off a house and you will be totally exorbitantly wealthy in a century of interest.
    >how does being biologically "frozen" work? If I shave one eyebrow and then get turned, do I wake up every night with one eyebrowshaved? Can I never lose weight? Put on muscle?
    >are brujah rebellious because they were picked for being life rebels? Or does some straight laced bro become James Dean overnight if a brujah bites you?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >why aren't all vamps really wealthy like ventrue? Just put your money into savings accounts and pay off a house and you will be totally exorbitantly wealthy in a century of interest.
      Because not everyone is smart, has the drive or lasts long enough to do that retard. Theres various ways your unlife could be cut short along with networks and territories carved out centuries before you enter the scene that exist simply to keep any power consolidated in the hands of the few
      >how does being biologically "frozen" work? If I shave one eyebrow and then get turned, do I wake up every night with one eyebrowshaved? Can I never lose weight? Put on muscle?
      Your a walking talking corpse that sustains itself via drinking blood, your body stops doing most normal things and stays the way it is, if your bothered by not having a pair eyebrows I feel like it woulnt be relatively too much of a feat to get them back when compared to things like lost limbs.
      >are brujah rebellious because they were picked for being life rebels? Or does some straight laced bro become James Dean overnight if a brujah bites you?
      The different bloodlines have their quirks like Malkavian insanity but overall your not going to turn into an artsy socialite just because a Toreador bit you.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Because not everyone is smart, has the drive or lasts long enough to do that retard.
        >hands of the few
        My brother in christ, it's literally a bank account. Put your savings in it and get night shifts. After a few decades you should have 6 figures. Put it in high interest savings and stocks. Kick back.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Pretty sure you can take points in wealth in the 5e tabletop actually. It just depends on your character. You can be a Gangrel who made his money hunting or capturing exotic animals or a Toreador art thief. You can even be a poor Ventrue, Ventrue can have goals in leadership besides acquire wealth

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Cool!

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >>why aren't all vamps really wealthy like ventrue? Just put your money into savings accounts and pay off a house and you will be totally exorbitantly wealthy in a century of interest.
      like most people vampire are dumb, also having property comes with the hassle of having to change your identity every 70 years or so, most vampire own nothing (and are happy)
      >how does being biologically "frozen" work? If I shave one eyebrow and then get turned, do I wake up every night with one eyebrowshaved? Can I never lose weight? Put on muscle?
      Your eyebrow, nails and hair keeps growing like a fresh corpse, but you can't lose weight or put on muscle, you are pertertually frozen with the general physic you had at the moment of your embrace (but maybe you can manipulate this using protean and vicissitude)
      >are brujah rebellious because they were picked for being life rebels? Or does some straight laced bro become James Dean overnight if a brujah bites you?
      The first option it's just clan culture. You could point out that culture changes over time but when you have a literal demigod controling your clan with his freaking mind changes are only superficial.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Your eyebrow, nails and hair keeps growing like a fresh corpse
        They don't grow after death. They just look longer because your flesh starts receding.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          okay, I just googled it and I was wrong: vampire hair resets every night to the length it was at their embrace and it is absolutely retarded...

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            imagine those poor 70's and 80's vamps stuck with mall hair, mullets, and perms forever
            Truly a fate worse than death.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Vampires work like a pyramid skeem. Most vampires are shitbirds barely better than thinbloods who do the dirty work and supporting the next level who support the next level until you get your clan elders with low humanity and half senile trying not to get diablerized.
      As for their appearance, it resets every night. If you shaved your hair off, it would grow back the next day to where it was. Battle damage takes longer to heal, but it will heal.
      You can use flesh crafting to make yourself look different, but the folks who do that are turning things into living furniture and abominations unto god.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Better lose the Christmas pounds before some brujah dang rapes you I suppose.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Pretty much. I'd hate to be doughy as fuck for eternity.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            If the Vampire is cool about it they pressure you subtlety in life to look good/prepare you before the bite.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Or go the other direction and go full pic related.

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                What pic anon?

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Phone posting from work. Forgot pic.

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I think the interesting part about turning into a vampire is that you dont get to choose who embraces you.
    It could be for any given reason, maybe some Nosferatu thinks your video game opinions are shit and you should look like a burn victim, maybe you just happened to chat up a Brujah while sperging about the ailments of society and the wish to do something, maybe a Toreador just thought you were neat and in a moment of fleeting interest turns you.
    I like it to be more related to circumstance rather than a clan member filling out a questionary in the bushes before deciding if you can join the club and jumps out to suck your neck.

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'll probably end up as a Malk, having to contend with the hivemind sounds like the most awful thing to firsthand experience on a daily basis. Lasombra would be cool

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    we'd all be nossies.
    I would like tzimisce or tremere.

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The insane ones or the ones that live in the sewers and eat rats.

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I would be a True Faith Rank 10 Vampire Hunter.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Same brother, but not in the way you're thinking

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I'd like to be a Salubri or Lasombra or Tremere.

  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Brujah
    How many protests have you participated in?
    >Gangrel
    How many animals have you hunted?
    >Malkavian
    How many voices do you hear (in your mind)?
    >Nosferatu
    How many houses have you sneaked into?
    >Toreador
    How many people have you fucked (literally)?
    >Tremere
    How many people have you fucked (figuratevely)?
    >Ventrue
    How much money do you have?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >How many voices do you hear (in your mind)?
      I used to see shadow people and was convinced my blood was poisoned by the devil and almost died trying to get the devil out of me. Can I join Malkavian now?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >How many people have you fucked (figuratevely
      Quite a lot

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Welcome to Tremere, now drink this some of this to guarantee you don't fuck US.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Tzimisce
      How many people have you tortured?

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    weakblood

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If I had a choice? Probably gangrel or Tremere.

    More than likely I would be turned by a Ventrue since people in charge seem to like me or a Toreador since I have some Toreodor friends.

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Vampire Hunter so I can kill gays.

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Schizo Malkavian like a true Ganker poster. I even talk to myself sometimes when I'm alone.

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I've tried a few of those dumb quizzes and I always get ventrue or gangrel, the discrepancy shows how accurate that shit is. Ignoring the thinblood issue, I'd probably actually end up as some minor clan with reclusive tendencies.

  22. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Tremere.

  23. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Brujah. Half of this place is filled with top tier Brujah candidiates

  24. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I thought the vampire personalities were as a result of being bitten, not being bitten because you have that personality

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's a bit of both tbh. You're embraced because maybe a vampire falls in love with you or because you have a certain skill set which impresses them, sometimes they embrace people out of spite or necessity like mass embracing a bunch of scrubs for some kind of Sabbat suicide rais

  25. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Anyone in here thinking that they wouldn’t just be sabbat shovel heads is making me lol

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      A random Toreador can just look at your having some kind of ambiguous trait of yours which inspired their "muse" and embrace you. It really doesn't take that much

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Being embraced by a toeradore will at best make you ugly hot

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It will also make me an immortal creature with the ability to use Presence where I can mind enslave people to get naked so I can paint them and then drink their blood.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            As a former artfag you don't need vampire powers to paint naked bitches. Just find a freshman art hoe and blow smoke up her ass about how you're deconstructing still life.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You think I have the social skills for that? Get out of here

  26. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I hope I'd be a Salubri, I like to think I'd maintain my humanity and still be good even after being turned into a monster

  27. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Malkavian, I am an unironic schizo.

  28. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Dominate
    >Rape
    Would this gain or lose you humanity?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yes based on motive

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Sex!

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Meant
        for

        Yes based on motive

  29. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Tremere, I would jump at the chance to be a wizard.

  30. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    probably tremere, because i'm a manipulative fuckwit.

  31. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Nosferatu of course.

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