Who becomes a klingon doctor?

Who becomes a klingon doctor?

  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The ones who heal faster from their own injuries since the others assume he's doing something about it.

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It’s like being a troll for the entire society
    >man passes out from blood loss on the battlefield think he’s on his way to Sto'Vo'Kor
    >he wakes up a week later in a bed
    >you’ve amputated both of his legs and replaced them with a dinky prosthetic
    Not only did you deny him an honorable death but now he’s just a worse version of himself than he was before.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >dinky prosthetic
      >Klingon doctor in the OP has the diminished ridges of the movie-era
      Nah, you'd have a replacement part cloned from your own meat.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >not puting a blaster in one leg so he can keep fighting and a explosive reactor on the next so he can die with honor
      NGMI

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    He who wishes to DO BATTLE with disease. Ea

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      just punch the sick out of weak cunts

      To become a doctor is to take up arms in in a war against the oldest and most implacable of foes.

      In the Star Trek: Enterprise episode "The Augments" a Klingon doctor and medical researcher finds a cure for a bioweapon that is being used dishonorably by his superior. He considers himself being executed for delivering the cure to be equivalent to a warrior sacrificing himself to win a great battle. The idea seems to make him very happy.

      In one episode of DS9 we heard a snippet of a Klingon science vessel's log where the captain spoke of winning battles against ignorance, and bringing home vast spoils in the form of new knowledge.

      To build on this, the various cannon lore books as well as the various RPG supplements mention Klingons having fairly advanced medicine, which makes sense for a warrior culture. Don't expect a lot of anesthetic or bedside manner, but damn if they won't get you back in the fighting shape.

      Interesting point of fact though, in the TNG episode s5ep16 "Ethics", Crusher notes that the Klingon medical division's records don't include a lot of neurological injury treatment, letting the patient die honorably rather than live with brain damage.

      It brings to mind some of the designs of works from the LOTR movies, designed by weta workshop: tons of scars, lots of stitches and staples. It's crude, but orc medicine is second only to the elves.

      Pick related, as you know martok could easily have had a replacement eye installed, but most likely kept the scars as a badge of honor.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        "War is the only proper school of the surgeon"
        - Hippocrates.

        It's entirely possible that the Klingons had better medicine in a lot of areas until tech made up for lack of practical experience. I remember someone saying that for a long while Ireland had the absolute best knee surgeons; because the troubles and the practice of kneecapping meant they had massive amounts of practice with very difficult rebuilding operations.

        In one episode of DS9 we heard a snippet of a Klingon science vessel's log where the captain spoke of winning battles against ignorance, and bringing home vast spoils in the form of new knowledge.

        I like to imagine Klingon accountancy grew entirely out of military logistics. And that a Klingon CPA has to be versed in hand to hand combat because you do not question a Klingon's expense receipts submitted for reimbursement without being ready to throw down.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >I like to imagine Klingon accountancy grew entirely out of military logistics
          He used...MONEY!

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous
          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Klingon Accountants would probably be highly sought after; at least for auditing roles.

            "Honorless Dog! You used straight line depreciation on capital assets that are infrequently used and for which per unit depreciation calculations are available, and changed inventory valuation from FIFO to LIFO during an inflationary period? Your ancestors turn their heads from your shame!"

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              You say this in jest, but remember how much "forensic accounting" Quark had to do and uncover D'Ghors plot in 'House of Quark'

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            ...*Human* accountancy did.

            Well, at least the Exchequer did- "the table with the checkerboard tablecloth we tally the warchest on".

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Klinger sports medicine should be the best in the quadrant

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    just punch the sick out of weak cunts

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    To become a doctor is to take up arms in in a war against the oldest and most implacable of foes.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Anon, That's Mercur's staff.

      You know, the god of thiefs and merchants.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Private healthcare.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous
      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        it's Ningishzida's staff, probably by misattribution during various periods of syncretism in antiquity, since his father Ninazu was the divine healer

        always name your files sensibly, kids, they won't make any sense at all to you in a couple of years otherwise

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    In the Star Trek: Enterprise episode "The Augments" a Klingon doctor and medical researcher finds a cure for a bioweapon that is being used dishonorably by his superior. He considers himself being executed for delivering the cure to be equivalent to a warrior sacrificing himself to win a great battle. The idea seems to make him very happy.

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    In one episode of DS9 we heard a snippet of a Klingon science vessel's log where the captain spoke of winning battles against ignorance, and bringing home vast spoils in the form of new knowledge.

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Someone gets beat up
    >Heal him
    >You're part of the reason he's still alive and kicking ass in the future
    >From now on you get a small sliver of the cred(and honor) for every fight he wins
    Easy

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Brings Bat’lith and a disruptor to their Thesis defense.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Go rewatch season 4 of Enterprise. What we learn of Klingon science, that is almost canon.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        YOUR HYPOTHESIS IS COWARDLY AND DISRESPECTS THE PUBLISHED STUDIES OF MY GRANDSIRE MRO’TOK! I CHALLENGE YOU TO COMBAT IN THE NAME OF THE HOUSE OF TOK!

        FOOLISH GRANDSPAWN THIS WARRIORS PROPOSALS INTRIGUE ME, AND BUILD UPON FOUNDATIONS I LAID IN WAYS WE DID NOT EXPECT! YOU DISHONOR ME BY YOUR PRESUMPTIONS BUT I AM HONORED BY HOW YOU WOULD SPEED TO OUR HOUSE’S DEFENSE; BUT SHOULD I FIND THE REST OF THEIR PAPER LACKING IT WILL BE I WHO TAKES HIS HEAD AND HEART TO SATISFY HONOR!

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >"Sir, my spine has been crushed by a hollow plastic barrel and therefore I have NO HONOR. I wish for you to pulp me in order to restore it"

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      he broke his back picking up a peanut

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    the small ones

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Cornelius, Cerimon, Caius and Butts

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    A lot of people don't realize just how metal a lot of medicine actually is. Klingons would have some real maverick doctors, the kinds doing batshit experiments just to see if something will work.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Hey kid, wanna help me perform medical experiments for honour?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I see disabled or elderly Klingons who are too much of a liability in battle being given the option of being guinea pigs for medical experiments as a way into Sto’Vo’kor.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          BATTLING IGNORANCE IS A NOBLE PURSUIT, AND DYING IN PURSUIT OF VICTORY OVER IGNORANCE IS VERY HONORABLE.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Klingon doctors are the equivalent of Starfleet engineers?

      >Hey so I sewed an extra arm onto you from Bolian that didn't need it anymore. Now you can hold an extra weapon in combat. Cool right?

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    a klingon med student

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Klingons in general have to do a lot of rationalizing. They're a warrior culture, in which everyone wants to be a warrior and die a warrior's death, but for big chunks of time they're basically at peace. Certainly they aren't in open war with the Federation, Dominion, or the Romulan Star Empire for most of the 24th century. They have little skirmishes with little spacefaring nations and short civil wars here and there, but that's it. So they all scramble to get aboard a starship and fly out someplace where someone might plausibly fire a phaser at them so they can say they're a warrior culture.

    Presumably all of the klingon construction workers, starship mechanics, doctors, logistics workers, communications officers, sewage workers, truck drivers, lacquer manufacturers, bookbinders, and hairdressers have developed some of the same rationalizations as the Tokugawa-era Samurai, where their craft somehow fuels the unmoving war machine or preserves the unused warrior ethos or something. One imagines that's a lot more difficult than when Starfleet personnel have to rationalize that they are still scientists, diplomats and explorers while shooting the newest hostile life form they've encountered.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      It's all tiered. Live with honor. That brings honor to your family. Which in turn brings honor to your House. Which brings honor to the Empire. And that honors Kahless.
      So even a farmer or a clerk can get honor.

      But then why try to become a soldier and die in battle?
      Because they offer the chance to get large amounts of honor, more then you could get in a lifetime otherwise. Enough honor to move yourself into a higher position. Or to get your family enough honor to beat a rival family with. Or to get your House more lands, resources or titles.

      During peacetime the different houses will, to prevent internal fighting, either fight other houses or try to expand into new territories in search of honor. That's why they're all so happy when a war breaks out, tons of easy honor to be had, and a chance to break some status quos.
      And in the end, the Empire grows stronger, larger and richer. It all works out. The system works.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      It’s all a partial game of pretend, like nobility and the honor code. Nobody behaves like the chivalric (or well, klingon stoic warmonger) ideal 100% of the time, they just pretend that their ancestors did to gain creed while actually having to maintain a society made of living people.

      So yes, lots of pretending, but there are klingon medics with klingon families waiting them home who just want to get sleep after a tedious day of work, and right theyre they couldn’t care less about honor or fighting death and disease.

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Step 1: Do harm.

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Who becomes a klingon tailor?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Fashion is a vicious battleground

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I'm imagining a bunch of houses sending they're most impressive models to somehow overpower the outfits of the competition before one of those judges with the spikeball gavel.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Fashion is a vicious battleground

      Fashion is a war where everybody can be slain most honourably.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        But they all dress in black and brown leather with spikes...

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous
    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >who else but the Obsidian Order to put the Fash in Fashion!

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The hot one.

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Honor comes in many forms.
    Most will seek a glorious death in honorable combat with a worthy foe, but every person can serve the Empire in their own way and bring honor to their name and House.
    And doctors? Doctors can pull a dying Klingon out of an honorless death to try again. Or stop an cowardly spy from killing themselves or poisoning others.
    They can make it so a bedridden Klingon finds the strength to lift a bat'leth again. Or counter an enemy disease or bioweapon.
    But even the simple acts, like helping the farmer or builder work harder by curing their ails ends up helping the Empire. Many small acts of honor do add up.

    And really, when you think about it, what could be more honourable then to fight an undefeatable foe? Kahless killed the Klingon Gods. Others have fought Time, or even destiny.
    Doctors choose to fight against Death itself. Qapla' Qel!

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Who becomes a Klingon Doctor?
    Klingons, I should imagine.

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    how is a discussion of star trek the most interesting, collaborative and intelligent content on this board rn. why do discussions of fantasy and other sci fi not reach this quality. God damn.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Because I really, really, really hate elves/Rey Skywalker/those assholes at wotc, and I need everyone to hear about it for the 900th time!

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Me too

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I always headcanoned that the society was set up like Sparta where everyone worth a damn was a warrior and everyone else was just slaves, and even doctors and scientists were still just slaves to the warriors, though maybe elderly warriors also engaged in intellectual pursuits and were held in higher regard.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      The ENT episode with Archer's trial touched upon this little: Other pursuits than the warrior life quickly fell out of fashion and actually caused problems for Klingon society.
      The Augment virus episodes kinda play into this too. We get the Klingon doctor who talks about why he became a healer and at another point, about his view on honor.
      So basically the truth seems to be somewhere between your headcanon and the way this thread went.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      The ENT episode with Archer's trial touched upon this little: Other pursuits than the warrior life quickly fell out of fashion and actually caused problems for Klingon society.
      The Augment virus episodes kinda play into this too. We get the Klingon doctor who talks about why he became a healer and at another point, about his view on honor.
      So basically the truth seems to be somewhere between your headcanon and the way this thread went.

      yeah it's really building on Ezri's commentary to Worf in the last season of DS9: that the Klingon Empire is in long-term decline, you can see that's already happening as early as first contact with Earth through Enterprise, but it's evident in The Undiscovered Country too - the Federation views the loss of a single energy production facility as disastrous for the entire empire

      it's not hugely surprising given the focus on expensive and disastrous wars and the constant antagonizing of other states like the Federation - makes trade hard and forces internal food, production and energy security, but even if we assume the problem began around 2100, then by 150 years in it's really fucked them bad enough that they're having to share tech with the Romulans just to stay relevant as the Federation and presumably others expand around them

      internal security is also pretty hard when you have constant internal wars as well, and by Gowron's time as chancellor it's obvious that the economy must be fucked - the leader of the empire hasn't got the first clue about economics and dismisses it all as "money!"; he's aware of its importance, but he can't understand it; post-Dominion War the empire has been solidly at war for like four years, and even though Klingons mature quickly - Alexander was only 1 when he looked about 6 on the Enterprise - those kinds of losses are hard to replace, never mind the economic damage

      by the end of the Dominion War it's clear that the Klingons are leaning heavily into the alliance, regularly letting Federation engineers work on their ships - this is not normal behavior in any government that values its technology secrets and has been at war with those same engineers within a few years, particularly as the arrangement isn't reciprocal with Klingons working on Federation ships

      but the ends of empires don't usually wipe away the people or their culture, they just become successor states which slowly morph into new forms

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Does the economy even matter in a post-scarcity economy? If you are post-scarcity, you don't need to economize. The only source scarcity is energy sources to materialize whatever you need.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Just because you're rich enough to not care about grocery bills doesn't mean you're rich enough to drop space fleets like a wizard drops shotguns.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Does the economy even matter in a post-scarcity economy?

          If you can't keep the replicators running, you may as well be banging rocks together to make fire.

          It's not just the lost of a single energy production. Praxis caused serious damage and contaminated the Klingon homeworld, Qo'noS
          , threatening the depletion of the oxygen in that planet's atmosphere within approximately fifty Earth years. A devasting blow for sure, but I don't get why they state that the Klingon Empire has only fifty years of life left when it only affects their homeworld.

          I can see them having to take the bitter pill of either abandoning the Qo'noS or having to divert resource to clean it up but I don't see how this would be that crippling to an interstellar empire and one that it a lot older than the Federation.

          I guess either they'd become heavily centralized in terms of power production - however that works out - or maybe just the internal politics of the empire were expected to rip it apart; given the warring houses stuff pre-Discovery (and pre-that, and post, thanks to the house of Duras) it's not surprising the Federation would want to sue for peace and shore up the ancien regime instead of letting it play out

          kind of surprising Kirk, who obviously lived through years of Klingon conflict, wasn't more behind shoring them up if the alternative was war, but maybe given his age he just thought it would be some other captain's problem

          either way I think Ezri's assessment of an empire in decline is pretty accurate even in Kirk's time, since even the loss of a homeworld wouldn't really matter long-term to a truly unified and stable interstellar empire

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        It's not just the lost of a single energy production. Praxis caused serious damage and contaminated the Klingon homeworld, Qo'noS
        , threatening the depletion of the oxygen in that planet's atmosphere within approximately fifty Earth years. A devasting blow for sure, but I don't get why they state that the Klingon Empire has only fifty years of life left when it only affects their homeworld.

        I can see them having to take the bitter pill of either abandoning the Qo'noS or having to divert resource to clean it up but I don't see how this would be that crippling to an interstellar empire and one that it a lot older than the Federation.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          To be fair, any nation would be crippled if you turned its' heartland from a productive core of power and industry into a seeping wound that demands either abandonment or a tremendous influx of resources.

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Someone that wants to make bank healing all the wounded Klingons beating the shit out of each other every day

  24. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Worth noting, there's a TOS episode where a Klingon diplomat is trying to secure dilithium rights from a primitive culture, and the Feds are trying to get it too. He says something like "what do the earth men offer you, powders and liquids for the sick? We Klingons believe as you do, the sick should die, only the strong should live".

    Some interesting points here. Prime directive seems to be out the window for the feds, probably because the Klingons already tainted the primitive tribal society. Klingons also are a little out of character, why not just take the minerals by force? I guess because the area was disputed with the Feds. The Klingon's appeal seems to show that in this era, medicine was not held in high regard. But it could also be BS the klingon was using to appeal to a tribal warrior culture.

    Note that this is likely irrelevant in the face of modern Klingon canon but interesting nonetheless.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Klingons always seemed to waffle between pragmatism and strict dogma of honor.

      My impression of Klingons were that being a warrior race really was just blustering and a way to keep themselves hyped up and honor is just a convenient "rule" to keep them in line when they go too far. Also their excessive aggression toward Feds and other races are just them being salty that they aren't the ones calling the shots.

      I think Klingons didn't mug the primitives because they actually aren't that evil as they like to pretend that they are. They always pick fights at the dime of a hat, but they almost never pull an unprompted sneak attack.

  25. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Klingon Academy shows quite a bit of backstory leading up to the Undiscovered Country and gives a LOT of character to General Chang. It's a videogame, so not canon, but there's so much in it.

  26. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  27. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You may see a few Klingons but I see a doctor, an engineer and a scientist

  28. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Are Klingon prostitutes a thing then? How much for your back door honor?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous
    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Klingon Civil War arc of TNG, when Gowron notices a Duras Heir has been scrounged up, he openly speculates which harlot's domicile they found him in.

  29. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Klingon Chiropractors (the ones that actually do the medical thing instead of pretending to cure cancer, autism, and AIDs by aligning your spine) probably get half confused for Klingon erotic massage parlors.

  30. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Klingon baristas.

  31. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Klingon bards

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous
    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You've truly not experienced Shakespeare until you've heard it in the original Klingon!

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