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Everyday people in the Pokemon world
ITT We are everyday people in Pokemon doing whatever.
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Why the frick do I need a licence to catch a Ralts while snotty kids abandoned by their parents are running around carrying around literal folk deities? Wtf, Elite Four? Fix your laws ffs
they know what you want to do to it
>Case in point
Just got my ENTIRE TEAM(2 pokemon) swept by a ten year old and his green cat AGAIN. What am I doing wrong?
some douchebag kid with a robot tyranitar just came and hyper beamed my tournament-winning venomoth, wat do?
i took it to a pokemon centre but it's still not doing anything, does anybody know what berry fixes this weird status effect? picrel btw
>10 year old kid walks into my house
>talks everyone there
>just leaves
life before you damn kids had your tiktok and your game boys !
Just move to Paldea. No one would be able to enter your house there.
Lmao just traded this homosexual little kid a haunter with an everstone
Roleplaying is agaisnt the rules
>caring about 1 thread
no one cares about you anon, your mother doesn't love you.
nobody cares
Are you one of those blue haired Unovans? Don't you guys eat like… fried Bouffalant nuts? Take the genitals outta your own mouth first before you accuse somebody else of sucking dick bro
shut up homosexual bootlicker, I bet you’re one of those losers with a Jenny Lives Matter sticker on the back of his truck
So are genwars, discord raids, nsfw threads, etc. yet those are spammed and stay up. I think a little rp is fine on this shitty ass board
That's a rule specifically about avatargayging you moronic zoomer.
i just checked the League's rulebook and there is no rule or clause that suggests Role Play is an illegal move
Why? I asked once and got told "it's sad and pathetic" or something like that, but there are anon in equestria threads on /mlp/.
You’ll never get a real answer, these gays unironically prefer genwar shitposting and thinly veiled porn threads
just finished whacking it to porn (human)
Fricking disgusting, I bet you have a grown woman fetish too you sick bastard.
I miss 420chan so much. This picture has me in my feels.
>420chan was sold
>it only cost $4,200
What the frick. I want to own a chan. I bet I would do a way better job than this. Those stoners literally can't figure out how to get it back up and running until 2025 for some reason? What an embarrassment.
A 10 year old kid defeated all my pokemon and I now am stuck defenseless in the middle of a forest.
somebody help me
Got up at 12pm and just fricked around on PC.
We've all done that.
My Absol is tweaking out and trying to write a message in the dirt. It looks a little like “this thread will be deleted. see you in the dozen discordgay unova bait threads spammed in the catalog tomorrow.” It’s probably nothing tho.
Why can't pokeballs work on people?
Beautiful
Sinnoh has a southern border with Johto, Mt. Mortar and Mt. Coronet are part of the same mountain chain. Did they not teach you about Sinjoh Ruins in school? Fricking Unovans and their geographic moronation.
Johto and Sinnoh cant be that close when all of the official artwork shows Sinnoh as an island.
>be galarcuck
>shitty pokemon (half the good pokemon are banned from their country LEL)
>shitty food (unovan food is unhealthy but it at least tastes good)
>don’t even have a reliable power supply cause muh giant glass space dragon will come in 1000 years
>conquered half the world and created a huge empire, now irrelevant shithole with a pathetic economy (can’t even afford doors in their capital city LMAO)
>champion uses KANTOOOO pokemon (thus admitting kantonian supremacy)
>best gym leader is a hoennianCHAD
imagine being the grotesque ogre that typed this all out
>grotesque ogre
Like your “women”, galarvae? Everyone knows galar slags are ugly as shit lmao
at this point, youre not even talking about pokemon anymore, youre just using the fact that pokemon regions correspond to real life locations as an excuse to make low effort Ganker tier shitposts.
do everyone a favor and get the frick out of this thread you annoying homosexual.
t. salty Spikemuf FC supporter
Didn't Galar literally retcon Charizard as being native to there?
Preety sure so did Kalos and Paldea.
No they didn't.
Wrong.
>some regions look a little like my speculative alternate universe superkanto region so that’s just how the world looks
Another Pokemaniac off his meds. Next you’ll tell me you found a legendary Pokémon under a truck. Do yourself a favor and buy an S.S. Ticket. Travel the world instead of buying into schizo shit.
tbh I miss the beta design that was just poke Japan until they said frick it and brought back entire countries as regions starting in gen 8.
isnt aloha closest to kanto tho
Damn, they raided another Ditto prostitutehouse
Toxic the Hypnos
Daily reminder that the Hypnocaust never happened. Think about it
>registeel comes to power and promises to deal with the probopass problem
>registeel supposedly uses poison gas to kill 6 million probopass
>yfw you realize poison gas doesn’t affect steel types
Suspicious that Regice was completely absent during the whole debacle and that Regirock - a known affiliate of the Probopass diaspora - was completely fine
Redpill me on regirock. Why are people always saying i shouldn’t trust him?
Who works nonstop for the Probopass, even on their holidays? Who loyally obeys every command they give without question? Who defends them from persecution by non-Probopass hostiles?
And yet, who did nothing during their darkest hour, when Registeel vowed to exterminate every last one? Who watched as the Golurks came and enslaved them decades prior, ransacking their humble towns? Who pays the media to keep quiet about such events, now that Registeel is AWOL like the others?
Indeed, Regirock plays both sides so that he always comes out on top. Registeel at least kept to his promises, and Regice couldn't break his promises as he never made any to begin with - Regirock is an ekans in disguise, a lycanroc in mareep's clothing, and always substitutes one promise for another.
Releasing your Pokemon is an act of love and acceptance of their true selves. It's not hard to be a decent human being! Imagine not being rooted in compassion.
plasma glowies gonna glow
To release a Pokémon that most likely grew attached to you, breaking its heart, and even brag about it, is not compassion, it's virtue signaling rooted in narcissism.
This map triggers my autism so bad cause that's not how the Pokémon world is. The Pokémon world is literary our word but a bit different. So Gen 1 to 4 is Japan, Gen 5 is New York, Gen 6 France, Gen 7 Hawaii, Gen 8 UK, Gen 9 Spain.
unova is genuinely embarrassing to look at on a map holy kek
Do i have to get Regice to beat you again, you lump of Rocks!
Did anyone find out what happened to Cynthia? They discovered a shoe belonging to her and her necklace torn off her jacket in some forest in sinnoh and a track of disturbed earth, but nothing else at all
Still not as bad as that time some homosexual unovan youtuber found a dead body in viridian forest
I heard Viridian forest has become the "suicide forest" of Kanto.
Nope, that would be Rock Tunnel.
Oh, you mean Rape Tunnel? I hear the pokemaniacs have been dragging cubones and slowpokes there to have their way with them (just a rumor of course)
Have you heard the rumors of there being a spiritomb worshiping death cult on the lowest floor? Is that where all the pokemaniacs are going?
I bet she was fricking the Sinnoh top coordinator Dawn Hikari on a hiking trip.
Remember when the photos of Cynthia and Dawn hanging out at Cynthia's Undella town villa got leaked?
You're telling me that was real, and not just a Mr. Mime in a pink dress?
I even saw it on an Ashnime-politan magazine cover
shartnova is threatening to sanction sinnoh and kanto if they don't accept more Scrafty into their regions
Well yeah, have you seen how many Ludicolos (Ludicoli?) and Lombres have been crossing the border lately? We've already got enough on our plate domestically, doesn't help that billions of our Pokedollars are going to the Probopass region while we're left with crumbs
Those pants-sagging thugs NEED to go. Preferably off to some third-world region with Jynx and other Ghettomon that habitually toss Torchic bones on the sidewalk
>Go to Kalos for vacation a few months ago
>Try out one of their "famous" restaurants while in Lumiose
>Order some food, it's actually pretty good
>All of a sudden some homosexual walks in with his Tyranitar
>Sand starts pouring through the doors and cracks
>It's fricking everywhere
>Rest of my food is ruined
>Leave without paying
>Eventually return to my home in Sinnoh
>Hungry, decide to take a trip to that restaurant near Lake Valor
>Open doors, see that same c**t from before with that same Tyranitar
>mfw more sand
>Try to teach the frickers a lesson
>Yell at the kid that his dumb pokemon is getting sand everywhere
>Kid insists it's not a big issue and that every rock type owner has to put up with this, Tyranitar starting to get grumpy and growls every time I get close to its trainer
>Decide I've had enough and discipline the big bastard with a good spanking when it nearly slices my face off
>Mfw I accidentally strike a vital organ (nobody told me the blue part was a sensitive weak point, I just thought that was its belly)
>Mfw the Tyranitar buckles over and falls onto the kid
>Mfw both are in critical condition
>Mfw I'm having charges pressed against me by the kid's family
Goddammit i think that spank counted as a fighting type move, that’s why it was super weak to it
That’s just Brendan (from the Pokemon Trainer trainer class)
oh so brendan is just another rich kid that got access to special genes. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised since gym leader norman recently moved in nearby heard he had a son. and he has special genes too
Actually Brendan is the son of prof. Birch.
Gym leader Norman tried to set the boy up with his daughter May but the boy clearly refused and went out to search for some backward tribe of dragon tamers who still live in caves.
Gotta get that Unga Bunda if you get what i'm saying.
Last i heard Gym leader Norman's children are traveling with some second year tryhard from Kanto and one of their gym leaders.
Norman's kids aren't even challenging the gyms.
Pretty smart of that Brendan kid to go independent and work doing research with his old man.
Guy caught dozens of Treeko on his own (for the their family breeding business, seriously starter lines are expensive as hell) and got a Totodile from his old man as a reward too.
I pity the Gym leaders/Ace trainer circuit.
They are basically up against a 12 yo genious who already has a stacked team with only 3 pokemon on it.
Last i heard he captured a Bagon and Altaria too.
hey guys bug catcher greg here. anyone see this weird trainer blast through petalburg woods with their combusken? i’ve never seen whatever trainer type they were before and I wanted to report him to the police.
I thought the government only allowed certain types of “npc clones” to exist or whatever that means. all I know is that whoever he was was definitely not normal. even bug catcher doug agrees with me. any ideas?
I think we all know what the worst region is. Imagine being Kanto and having NO dark types yet still being a crime infested shithole
>Home region to an outbreak of sentient purple diarrhea piles borne from the poorly-maintained sewage system, public health hazards aplenty
>Fake Jihadist Pokeballs regularly escape power plants and roam free in the wild, where children unsupervised by their parents freely roam
>Literal fricking child effortlessly brought an end to the region's biggest crime syndicate that the highest branches of government have been struggling to deal with, crime lord fricked off to some impoverished island region and hasn't been seen since
To be fair Dark types are perfectly suited to fighting crime as police pokemon.
>Mean look to prevent escape.
>Sucker punch as a perfect counterattacking move reliably defebdable in court as aggression response.
>Family structures that lend them to blend well with human society after recieving a barebones discipline training.
>The apparent ability to see in the dark and sense danger.
>Darl type powers perfect for guarding an area from Ghost type scouts/saboteurs, Psychic infiltrators/escapees/mindreaders and defenses against darl types trained by criminals.
The only job they are more suited for is ranger work.
If you want to argue a "criminal" type then Poison types are more common in any criminal organisation.
How type energy affects trainers is also not a well adressed study toppic.
Ghost type specialists basically have to be on calming drugs 24/7 because of how their minds are being affected.
>Ghost type specialists basically have to be on calming drugs 24/7 because of how their minds are being affected
You just KNOW Morty is on something.
Yes but he uses perscriptions.
You don't get to be a publicly employed Channeler/Gym leader/E4 member if you do abuse drugs.
You can ocassionally hear him lamenting on not being permitted to dump the role on someone else so he can become a Fire type specialist instead.
Anyway back to the topic of type e ergy.
Apparently Humans had a comon ancestor with the Medicham line and thus have 2 energy reserves that can fill with random type energy, some inherited some gajned through deliberately training as a type specialist.
Essentially humans gain a type but with heavy side effects to their mental state and physical health.
Ghost type specialists are often sleep deprived due to their senses going haywire via Ghost type energy and are fond of pranks.
Fire type specialists... Male ones go bald and sterile without proper guidance and women run the risk of spontanuosly combusting during childbirth without the same specialized training.
They also tend to emmit heat and bursts of fire while being particularly emotional hence it's deemed the most dangerous type specialty.
Flying type specialists like Lance (lol) tend to be extremely precise but develop OCD and an extremely competitive nature (perfect for a bureaucrat/cop).
Water type specialists tend to develop great looks, athletic ability and some form of healing abilities but are constantly moody.
Beware of dating a female water type specialist tho.
They are on a constantly hormonal state that tends to drive them to want to give birth to more children.
Psychological counseling is advised.
Dark type specialists are... Well edgy and constantly brooding while trying to styme their violent impulses.
They are disciplined tho and as stated above tend to make great cops and social workers.
Ground type specialists are greedy fricks hence why you fon't see many leagues allowing them to run gyms or for e4 members.
The only ones currently permitted are also Steel and Water type specialists.
If you study Poketaxonomy you'll even notice that Medicham, Ralts, Gothitelle and Hariyama - and, by proxy, we fellow humans - all share a common ancestor, there's a lot we have in common both socially and biologically! These four pokemon are our closest living relatives and branched off fairly recently on an evolutionary time scale, and despite appearing radically different on a surface level from each other, they share typings and have many similar physical traits!
>…Why are there people in my PC asking if you can breed with them?
To be fair we Humans branched off in our own sepparate egg group after loosing our inborn type e ergy and the ability to lay eggs.
We do essentially have a permanently active move with Helping Hand tho.
It connects a humans energy reserve to a pokemon thus making them stronger and letting them grow much faster than if they were wild thus the initiative wild pokemon take to find a trainer.
The only ones who used to be able to use it actively were tribal leaders and chieftains (from whom the local Gyms and training traditions originate from) but pokeballs made it possible for more ordinary people to connect.
Another point indicating Medicham as our closest related species is that Fughting and Psychic type specialists have an easier time developing pokemon-like abilities and the ability to use moves.
Both only face minor behavioral changes too with Fighting type specialists becoming more sportslike (healthy in group competition selction) and Psychic type specialists becoming heavily intelectually active.
Prof. Birch of the Hoenn region is said to specialize both and is a perfectly normal man aside from his habit of playfighting scores of wild pokemon.
Seriously the amount of interns that quit over him "playfighting" whole packs of Mightyena is quite ammusing.
>Ralts
>anywhere near the pokehomosexual sapiens genus
Ah yes, this freak with silk for skin and crystals for organs is definitely a close relative of "guy with lips and pants", "guy with big fists and pants" and "guy with lips and dress". You're little better than the boomers who say Jynx is a pokehominid just because it has fat breasts and they fricked one at a brothel in kanto.
Go read a biology textbook that's not 50 years out of date.
Notice the head protuberances and the pseudo-dress shared with Gothitelle, there is no way that is purely convergent and evolutionarily unrelated
*Don't forget the psychic abilities, spatial distortion and the intense fixation on emotions both species share, especially that of their trainers'
Not to mention how Gallade occupies the same fighting-type niche shared by the other aforementioned mons
>dress
Gothitelle's dress is made of repeating, layered segments along the whole length of the torso, while the Ralts line's dresses are single layer, beginning at the hips. Also, the Gothitelle line's dresses are an analogous structure to the Medicham line and Hariyama's pants(though not to Makuhita's) while the Ralts line's dress is, as
pointed out, a reduced symbiote.
>head protuberances
Gothitelle's bows are purely sensory organs, numerous across the body, and are derived sections of its dress. If you were talking about the "ear" protuberances instead, those are derived dermis too - and they're actually analogous to those little head tassles on Medicham.
The Ralts line's crystals, while having a similar placement to Gothitelle's bows, are externalized energy circulation organs(although they serve a sensory role as well). They're also derived from bone tissue. There's typically only two of them across the whole body.
The "dress" is a symbiotic pokemon that got reduced to an organ.
Given the innate skilks the Ralts line has with Grass and Ghost type moves we belive it was originally a Ghosst/Grass type pokemon that liked to be worn as a cloak to protect others from ghost types while being fed scraps.
Such a creature probably still exists in full through Sawk and Throh, who fashion such plant matter into crude garb - which begs the question whether they too are related to the Pokehominid family, especially given how marketable they are to children. A vestigial psychological remnant of some long-forgotten behavior, perhaps?
You will notice that most poke-hominids fashion clothes due to lack of furr.
Meditite beat seaweed into strands of fabric to fashion the "pants" they hand to their young.
Those eventually become body parts of Medicham as they evolve.
Please note that i will have to digress into another topic but it seems that most plants used for this behaviour have strands of ghost type particles in them or are adapted to dark type energy.
The reason why i mention Ghost type particles is because they aren't well understood by most.
Amorphous pokemon(mostly ghost types) are in truth fungal based organisms that adapted for a particular type of energy and most of their kind exist ina spore like state that under the right conditions flourishes into a pokemon.
For most ghost types that means areas of high decay like swamps and graveyards, hence they spawn there.
They sometimes digest fragments of psychic energy from nearby corpses and mistake them as their past lives so cases like Yamask have spread quite the bit of superstition.
Suppet/Bannete seem to be the human equivalent of a symbiotic ghost type but due to the danger they pose most humans shunn them.
Their habit of feasting on dead human skinn cells has led to too much injury in the last.
Animalistic ghost types are a different matter entirely as they adapted to prey on the fungi based ghosts instead.
In fact Alolan Marrowhack being Fire/Ghost types is probably an adaptation meant to enhance their ability to prey on ghost types.
The recently rediscovered variation in Thyplosion along with Anihialape support this theory of their origin.
I dunno, I met an Inkaystagram influencer once who owns a Gholdengo and the only thing off about him was how jittery and sniffly he was, how his pupils were as big as Bronzors, and how he'd spontaneously bleed from the nose now and then. He kept asking if I "do snow", but I didn't have any ice type pokemon on me at the time. I guess he likes skiing!
I caught his Gholdengo counting a HUGE stack of Pokedollars once after handing some visitors a package, have no clue what that was about either.
He must really like smart pokemon who know tricks too, I guess!
The Paldean authorities would like to know that particular influencer.
Care to share a link?
>Can sense impending disasters
>Justified ability makes it stronger when hit by dark attacks such as theif or beat up, moves likely to be used by nefarious individuals
>Immune to the prankster ability
>Knock off to recover stolen property
>mean look to prevent escape
>taunt to stop any sneaky strategies they may employ
>zen headbutt, night slash and play rough to handle poison, ghost and dark types
>Thunder wave and false swipe to bring in criminals alive
Absol would be an MVP for law enforcement
Adding to all that, I’m surprised there isn’t a global initiative to breed working Absol and put one onto every single Ranger’s team. It is literally the perfect Pokemon for their line of work. Versatile, long-lived, thrives in multiple extreme climates, and serves as a mobile high-powered barometer.
Stupid b***h of a mother is thinking about catching a Skwovet and giving it to me for my birthday. I don't want a common normal type shitmon as my first pokemon! I want a first partner pokemon like Charmander or Froakie! How do I convince her to change her mind, bros?
>charmander
>froakie
normalBlack person detected, get off my fricking board, this is a place for connoisseurs of underrated pokemon like stantler and lunatone
I bet you only want a charmander cause you saw leon use one on tv too, homosexual
Frick you, Charizard and Greninja are the best pokemon to own right now and I want to go pro league. What am I going to do with a fricking Lunatone? '
Thanks, I'll try telling mom about this. Hopefully, I can get her to contact a pokemon professor to ship a partner pokemon to me.
Skwovets love to gnaw on furniture and try to escape, and Greedents are health hazards due to the decaying food in their fur, not to mention a massive pain on their owners' wallets
Just feed it some Rattata poison from under the sink and watch as it froths at the mouth and blows its bowels out of both ends, problem solved
If she wants to give you a pokemon then ask her openly on what you can afford.
Skvovet/Greedent eat too much so you can strike them from the list pretty easily.
If you want a good starting fire type that you can afford then Torkoal is a good choice.
Otherwise stick to Growlith.
For water types is where it becomes tricky as the starter lines are pretty much the only reliable amphibious water types (frick training a Psyduck).
In that particular case i suggest Lotad as they can move on land while being fairly obedient and reliable.
Just had to move to Paldea for business reasons and although I'm enjoying the wide open space, man this place feels too laid back for it's own good. I want to hit up that Area Zero place but they won't let normal people go there without some sort of clearance or something. I don't know maybe I'm just homesick.
They also wouldn't let my Nidoking through customs, the frick is that about?
You think that's bad? I went to Galar to visit family, and customs deadass took my Chesnaught off of me, confiscated the Pokeball and gave me a fat fricking fine
Man I've heard nightmares about Galar, never been personally though if I went it would stick to the islands, I've heard they're better.
Your mom is trying her best for you anon, don't be a little shit. Whereever you're situated right now I'm sure there's a pokemon in your area that you'd actually like as a starter.
>he isn't from Galar
Reminder that Unovans are only legally allowed to go on Pokemon adventures when they are 14 LOL
Trainer licensing isn't well regulated to begin with.
>Indigo
was never good at keeping their own laws or maintainging cohesive families so their average trainer age is 8.
>Hoenn
permits kids under 12 to be trainers while under adult (legally 16) supervision so you tend to see most of them on beaches with their parents or older siblings.
>Sinnoh
The legal age is 15 but they have a scolarship exception for as early as 10.
Same as Hoenn little kids are allowed to train under adult (18) supervision.
>Unova
Legal age is 16, scholarship exception like Sinnoh at age 10.
But they similarly aren't that good at enforcing their laws sk they have 8 year olds roaming the routes.
>Kalos
Legal age is 15, adult (18) supervision from age 10 also permitted.
>Alola
Legal age is 10 and for some reason they are actually able to enforce their laws (suck on that Indigo).
>Galar
Legal age is 16, adult (16) supervision frkm age 10 also permitted.
>Paldea
has a whole national education programme starting as early as 3 year old (based around when the kids pass the enrollement examn) with starters and curiculum deliberately tailored for all ages.
Part of why they have no crime gangs, everyone too buisy enjoying food, being outside or studying.
>Be me
>12 years old
>Live in the Unova region
>Have a Houndour as a family pet
>Let him out to use the bathroom
>Decide to play fetch with him while we're out
>Ball goes too far into road
>Suddenly some gay from Paldea comes barreling down the street on a Revaroom with a chassi attached to it
>Hits my houndour
>He obviously dies
>Fricker also drives off
>Have to explain to my family how a Pokemon and trainer from another region did this
>they believe me but the guy is never found. They think turning a revaroom into a functional vehicle is impossible
I've never been the same since
Why are they like this?
>Paldeans using the sheer power of their shitty music to cause me permanent hearing damage
So has there been any updates on the allegation cases against Xavier the student? The amount of missing student cases haven't decreased.
Don't refer to him by name, your family might be next. Please refer to the specimen as
>Xatu: Renegade Angel
Are there updates on Xatu now or not?
Last seen harassing the drought-stricken populace in Rural Hoenn, results disastrous and presently being covered up by the Elite Four
Man.
Steven is stuck collecting rocks in the boonies as usual.
Just call that kid Birch to solve it.
I checked his accreditations of the web site of his dads laboratory.
He already has several university diplomas at 12.
What's Nigel feeding his family?
I want some of that too.
Wow, you guys seem to have it bad, guess being a Johtobro in the modern era is good.
>Be me
>Live in Johto
>There is no strife, war or crime after Team Rocket got chased away by a kid
>Nobody gives a shit about us
>Wake up in beautiful Goldenrod City every day
>Take my Absol and Sylveon on a walk around National Park
>Bug catching contest is on
>Take part in it because, why not, frick it
>Catch this massive Scyther
>Win the contest
>Get a metal coat
>It's now a Scizor and he's a really chill dude
>Get some takeout and eat it on a bench with my mons
>Beautiful sunset
>Life is great
You guys should move here.
I'm breaking the rules of the thread because your post brought back long buried feelings of wanting to Balamb Garden myself to Johto. I think I'm gonna boot up Soulsliver again.
>Be me
>Live in J*hto
>There is nothing to see or do besides counting the claims of Beheeyem abductions because this rural region has frickall going for it
>Wake up in Goldenrod City and still have the worst internet compared to every other region
>Have to fence my house off and put up barbed wire like a poorgay because Umbreons rummage through the trash at night and Furrets shit all over my roof during the day
>Swarm of Scythers suddenly plagues the region and lays waste to our only redeeming quality, our blossoming agricultural industry
>Stuck inside as events straight out of the Book of Arceus go down outside
>Scyther smashes through the windows and chases me around angrily
>Lock myself in my room while this beast probes and rummages through my pantry with its hideous crop-felling limbs
>Night begins to fall, decide it's safe to leave
>Motherfricker has shed and strewn bits of exoskeleton all over the floor, is now a Scizor sleeping in the splintered remains of my kitchen
>Awakens and springs up from its pile of pilfered food when it hears me stepping on a creaky floorboard
>This pillaging arthropod squatter chases me out of my own house, I run off into the sunset
>Life sucks
You guys should never move here.
Anon that was 30 years ago, the great Johto famine of '93 happened because those frickheads in Kanto imposed international sanctions on us. You gotta stop letting the past get to you, man.
Ah, you're right. Things change, I guess. Stupid fricking Scizor still lives in my old house though, motherfricker's done shacked up with some purty Leavanny last I saw. Is that even legal?
No law against pokemon marrying pokemon, whatever species they may be. Only against pokemon marrying humans
UNOVA IS THE GREAT GIRATINA OF THE WORLD
When are they gonna pay reparations?
How many fricking Corviknight taxi bombings is it gonna take to get the message across?
ooh ah
It seems like team rocket has had some rough times ever since that kid broke their shit in a couple decades ago. Did you hear about that leaked porno of Giovanni getting fricked by a machamp??
I'm more concerned about his money laundering startup in Alola with that Green-Haired Unovan Hippie and the other rich pompous frick from Kalos. Who's funding this? Didn't all three of these guys commit domestic terrorism at some point?
I am so fricking sick of my tax dollars going to pokeorphanages full of peoples abandoned smoochums.
Their Hitmon-daddies went out the door and never came back the moment the egg test came back positive. Then people wonder why so many of them end up trashing urban areas once they grow up into Jynxes. Nobody taught them not to set pokecenters on fire and twerk over the charred remains, get pimped out and suck dick both man and mon alike for $$$ and riot every time an Officer Jenny btfos a George Floatzel
When is the usual closing time for a gym? Asking for a friend?
They work 9am to 5pm.
Don't bother wandering onto their properties after or before that time.
They boosted up their security all around with new reforms:
>Honchkrow led murders patrolling the air and emitting random dark pulses disturbing any Teleportation allert ontop of being awake 24/7 and sounding the alarm when someone tries to get in above ground.
>Seizmic sensors so no digging in either.
>Psychic interrogators on speed dial to thoroughly question intruders.
>Multiple ace trainers under employment taking rotating shifts to patrol.
One good thing TR/Magma/Aqua/Galactic/Plasma/Flare did was to force the leagues to get their shit together.
the only people who draw maps like that are the morons that don't know that regions are based on real places
Some Rocket homosexual stole my TM 28 but I will be ready for the next one.
I thought Rocket was disbanded.
Must have been that weird foreign guy. Do you live near Cerulean city by any chance?
I moved from Kanto when I was 10. I live in Kalos now.
>Tfw the Weather will be 25 degrees in Sinnoh
I don't think i'm gonna make it lads. It's burning here, phew
off to trash with ye
moron
>I am mad that 1 single thread wants to have fun.
get over it.
The life with Pokemon threads were the best thing to happen to /vp/ and the quality of this dogshit schizo board dropped immediately when they were banned. You should be grateful this thread is here to elevate the state of the catalog for a little while you stupid shitposter Black person.
>go on a hike
>a Youngster challenges me to a battle
>my mon puts his mon to sleep and sets up agility and swords dance
>he sends in his next mon and I put it to sleep like the last
>The Youngster starts shitting his pants about some 'sleep clause' nonsense
>Laugh and have my mon baton pass
>Younster is actually frothing with anger
>have my mon use minimize
>Youngster has ascended to the next plane of seethe rambling incoherently about an 'evasion clause'
>baton pass into Farfetch'd and sweep his team
Underrated post.
I’m telling you guys you can’t knock slowpoke tail until you’ve tried it
reddit.com/r/pokemedia ass thread
Why the frick is my Wigglytuff weak to poison all of a sudden? Is she sick???
The Pokemon League microchemicals got to her, man. They've been spreading that shit around, putting it in water and food. They're trying to write it off as a new "Fairy Type" but NOBODY is buying that shit
Get her off her diet and get her some incense to detox
Next you’re gonna tell me they’re making the politoeds fairy type
You must be from the toxic hell of Indigo.
Enviromental polution has caused their Fairy types to lack the necessary type energy to properly manifest their energies.
The only place they thrive over there is a small stretch of land between Violet, Azela and Goldenrod.
>get told johto is some kawaii paradise and I should totally go
>get to johto via BOAT because there's no fricking airports
>no public transport EXCEPT for a train you need a pass THAT YOU CAN ONLY GET IN KANTO
>try my luck in the gym of the capital city
>get destroyed by a MILTANK
bros please I'm done take me back to Unova
Everyone says johto is le heckin epic trad country but honestly hoenn is infinitely better and more kino (and has better nature too). If you ever visit another region go to hoenn.
Frick Hoenn, when it's not plagued by infrastructure-damaging droughts and heatwaves it's deluged by torrential rains and swamping floods.
When it gets REALLY bad with earthquakes and tsunamis, some weird fricking Pokemon come outta nowhere and start b***hing and having sissy slap fights until some gay green thingy comes down from the sky, shouts "FUG" loud enough to shatter windows and damage more infrastructure, and forces everything to go back to "normal" - which by Hoenn standards, is I guess a brief period of trying to repair their fricking ramshackle slum region before the next chapter of the New Book of Arceus goes down.
>earthquakes and tsunamis
Black person, kanto johto and sinnoh have that too. We’re an island dumbass.
I feel like you’ve never even been to hoenn cause that “weird fricking pokemon” and “gay green thingy” stuff only happens about once every 1 million years
Don't forget that weird senile man claiming he saw an island in the middle of the sea
>gay green thing coming from the sky and shouting fug
KEK
are pawniard blades sanitary
>be me
>be picnic
>sandwich time of course
>trusty recipe hand down from ma to me
>hand down from me to pawniard
>salt the bread
>lettuce layer
>tomato, then smoked fillet
>adorn with avocado
>top bread, and cut in half
just wanted to know if it was safe to eat
If it washes its blades sure. If it’s been off stabbing random gross wild Pokemon, no it’s not fricking sanitary.
oh
adios
Feethomosexualry ruined this
What did he post
Seviper vore comic
I am new to this board and have never seen it. QRD please anon? Or care to share? What is so bad about it
Aldith btfos Cynthia (based) and feeds her to a Seviper
Anons here either like it or lie about not liking it
WHO THE FRICK IS "ALDITH"???
Its a European supermarket brand.
> Be 7 years old me
> Go to Aldi in South Kalos with parents
> Mom buy Crabominable Ice pops and Mangriff soda
> Go to the beach
Good times. It's a shame we lost my brother to a Palossand that day. c**t shouldn't have tried to steal my ice pop.
Little shit deserved it, nobody should do Crabom-sicles that dirty
>Angie
no one here tolerates your shitposting stupid voreBlack person
Got a pic of anything? I doubt it happened and you are lying you dog faced rat moron
Real?
homie you into vore?
#MaxieDidNothingWrong
Why did the Pokecenter nurse say my Gardevoir has "Ebola"? This isn't Pokerus, wtf? Is this a status effect transmitted by some nu-region shitmon?
Just got done having sex with my Ditto
Love that b***h so much
What happens when it inevitably craps out an egg? Will a baby you hatch from it?
licking her toes when I would eat her ass
what did you have it transform into?
My local gym leader, Roxanne