>missed out on the friend making shit in HS because I was a moron
>cant find teammates for squads and buddies in multiplayer games
>tried finding friends in games and social media
>appearently everyone is just in absolute slience and only talking with their irl buddies on discord and refuse to interact with anyone else now
How the frick are you even supposed to make friends nowadays? Everyone is just so reserved to their own friends and isolating other people
You need to talk to people and be interested in them but without so much interest that you want to have sex with them
If the other person reciprocates the above, congratulations you have a friend.
>and be interested in them
this is the hardest part
It's really not unless you view yourself above everyone else
>studied hard
>Had a shit office job but make good money
>Have a son with wife at 25
>He is sever autist (you can't detect severe autism during pregnacy)
>He is 9yo
>Can't talk only makes weird noises
>Only play with baby toys
>He have to wear diapers because somedays he refuses to go to the bath
>Some days he becomes agresive and destroys the house
>He only sleeps 3-4h
>No sex with wife (sex drive goes to 0 when you don't sleep a full night for years)
>Only fun thing of my life is playing some vidya in the bus to work
>Regret not being a comfy happy neet.
*yawns at your post*
You dont have sex, your wife sure does tho
Christ. You should either get rid of him (I know this sounds cruel, but know this - as a severe autist he's not much different from a wild animal, you both will waste your time, health and money but you can't help him - he was born with his neural connections completely fricked) or get a divorce, preferably settled before the Court decides (and it will suck).
There's no way it's going to work out. I understand it's a difficult decision to make, but you need to understand there's no virtue nor glory in wasting your life on a hopeless cause. It's a thankless and pointless job.
At least his symptoms when ill are mildly lessened, worthy trade-off if you ask me.
>people still unironically respond to the "sever autist" copypasta
>fell for the marriage and kids meme
Fake but gay. But it is god punishment for giving people kids with autism because their parents were most probably bullies and lived in sin. They deserve to have children with autism.
serious question, does he have a condition that could've been diagnosed with ultrasounds/screening during pregancy? because if that was the case I dont feel sympathy for you
>All these (you)s over copy paste
ah. Its summer.
why do i keep seeing this shit
is it a new meme manga
It's demon slayer
i have made several 'friends' in mmos/multi player games.
But after a while they'll push me to tell more about myself and i always, like fricking five times now admit to an extent being a clinically depressed fricking loser and then i can't talk to them anymore because they'll get 'nicer' like they fricking pity me, how can you be friends with someone you don't respect?
Am i moronic for this?
I'm not, right?
What happened to toxic masculinity?
Two of them were women but three were fricking men.
I don't have 'ugly thoughts'.
people have pushed me to share and when i give a single hint it's over and i get treated like a moron.
I'm nothing but nice to others and all i get back is pity.
And it's so bad i'm fricking venting on Ganker now.
Because you're moronic. You can only share this kind of intimacy with really close friends and even then only in the right mood and context but you have done it with casual friends and people you don't fully trust. Obviously these people don't know how to react. They neither know you enough, nor do they care enough to take you fully serious. Not to mention this kind of topic should be talked about in a one on one and not in a group.
They just want to have a good time with other people and that's it. Of course things get awkward when an autist shares something heavy in a lighthearted room. They don't know how to treat you afterwards, you probably also have done nothing to make clear how you want to be treated either because you're autistic. I just see people that were nice enough to at least take you seriously and react in some way. You blame them but you don't know to react as well, you only expect other people to understand and take proper action, but you yourself don't do anything to elevate the situation or understand other people. I hate autists so much it's unreal.
Wild projecting on your part, man.
I don't go out of my way to share anything.
And it was never in groups or lighthearted conversations ir people i just fricking met.
I'm talking about five different people that i talked to daily for months that in private conversations about their lives/views/opinions keep pushing me through several conversations yo share more about myself while i try to avoid it untill i eventually let slip a fricking fragment of how i actually feel or my actual condition which causes them to completely switch gears, lose all respect for me and throw a pity party, never reacting the way they used to untill i'm forced to cut all contact.
You hate autism?
look in a mirror.
I'm glad you can understand this shit, man.
It's awful to lose contact with people like that, they can get emotional and personal and it's all good but the moment you share anything they never treat you the same.
Overcoming that would be on them.
You can't make them change their view on you or make them treat you normally.
Your responsibility is to respect them,if they can't respect you, it's over.
>Wild projecting on your part, man
This response is prompting for an argument. I don't care about a rough tone but indicating that you want to argue shows that you're not responsive. I can be wrong on multiple accounts but my job was never to analyze your situation correctly and yours was never to question my analyze. I was merely prompting you to rethink the situation and reflect on it, but you have done the worst thing and seen it as an attack. You probably usually react like this and become unresponsive. The common reaction for someone with low social intelligence.
Calling you out on false assumptions is not hostile nor do i think you're 'attacking me'.
You made some weird assumptions and now you're getting defensive about getting called out.
Yeah you don't owe me shit but then just don't reply to my whining.
Relax.
Even if I was angry, this is completely irrelevant and calling me out on it is a bad habit you have picked up on Ganker and indicates that you are in a fighting mode. Clearing up "false assumptions" is also completely irrelevant because you don't have to care about your standing and defending yourself is a pointless task not leveraging the advantages of being anonymous.
This is not about owing me or not and I never indicated as much. I just see a very common pattern that you are demanding your environment to change on its own to your advantage which is literally the most illogical act known to men. You can only change your own behavior which as a result will change your environment. And except for some cases in where you want to leverage coping mechanism, there is never an advantage to seeing the problem in others instead of yourself, because only by seeing the problem in yourself you can start taking action and changing outcomes to your advantage. Talking about accountability and looking at who is more wrong is completely pointless in reality and brings zero change and only stagnation.
All your assumptioms have been false, you clearly have no idea about the situation i'm in and you're still on your high horse pretending to know anything.
You type like an autist and think like an autist so once again Mr. 'i hate autists' Look in a mirror.
Yes, I was wrong on all accounts. But why do you care about being right or wrong, you should only care about learning. I learned from our exchange and for that I thank you and I genuinely feel that way. Have a nice day, king.
Everyone wants to be right, that's normal, but good of you to finally see reason.
'Learning' from random online conversations and from your own assumptions is a recipe for disaster however.
But hey, you too man, enjoy your day.
You guys should be friends.
What if I'm ugly, which caused people around me to treat me like shit, which caused me to develop ugly thoughts, since we're not all born as suddhist monks and people treating a kid bad will naturally lead the kid to feel bad?
Doesn't matter. Life is unfair and you get nothing in return for your disadvantages. Well at least if you're bitter about it and demand the unfairness to be repaid in some form.
Oh yeah I already learned as a kid that no one is entitled to happiness or fairness and made peace with my lot in life. I just find very self-serving and lacking in empathy for people to think that "oh you're ugly, that means you're a bad person, I look good because I'm a good person".
This is not a conscious thought like you put it. People are just going to subconsciously like attractive people more than ugly ones on average. It's called the halo effect.
Also on Ganker ugliness tends to be generalized with sexual unattractiveness which is simply wrong. Just because no women showed interest in you doesn't mean you're ugly, in the sense that people would like you less for just your looks.
>Just because no women showed interest in you doesn't mean you're ugly, in the sense that people would like you less for just your looks.
This is very much true. I have a lot of male friends who aren't ugly and they don't get any attention from women. It's certainly harder to make friends if your unattractive for obvious reasons but being able to attract women != ability to get male friends (which are your only true friends anyway)
>This is not a conscious thought like you put it.
Most people, yeah. But the guy who made the book I was originally replying to, and people posting that page from it *are* putting it in a conscious thought.
Ok but what is your point?
Self-reflection for the people posting and reading that, to not take the image at face value and maybe consider the scenario from an opposite perspective.
I would not even call it a different perspective. It's just the book is optimistic with cause and effect because with the book's version you can stop being bitter and people will like you more while with your negative version there was never any hope to begin with because cause and effect are in an endless cycle.
>It's just the book is optimistic
Optimistic if you're reading it as an ugly person. If you're a good looking person, it just reinforces the idea that ugly people are bad people and you're a good person for being good looking.
And there is a way out of the bitter hell of ugliness, even without gaslighting yourself but I'm not here to hold a TED talk.
Reading the point you presented from that perspective has zero to do with your attractiveness, you already have to be a huge butthole to think like that to begin with. You seem to be bitter towards attractive people if you genuinely think like that.
>you already have to be a huge butthole to think like that to begin with.
But that's literally what the book is saying and you already described the halo effect (and its counter, the horn effect) which is exactly that? I'm just making impartial observations, ignore that I'm ugly for a second. (It's hard, I know, saying I'm ugly already makes you want to discard my point.)
The book is simply stating that the reason people don't like you is because you're an butthole and not because you're ugly because insecure people always blame their insecurities instead of taking the more objective stance that they are bitter butthole regardless of the reason.
Ironically you're doing the exact same thing the entire time even though it would be impossible for your looks to matter in this environment and you know it. It's merely your insecurities and bitterness speaking, which the book is warning you about.
By the way, this is not about being right or wrong if you want to insist another time on your opinion. I'm merely stating what the book is trying to say.
>The book is simply stating that the reason people don't like you is because you're an butthole
The book is making a much broader statement, that ugly people are the result of ugly thoughts. That's the point I'm debating, the rest of your post is simply attacking a strawman with made-up arguments.
>By the way, this is not about being right or wrong if you want to insist another time on your opinion. I'm merely stating what the book is trying to say.
You claiming I'm bitter towards attractive people is the opinion which I disputed as right or wrong, it wasn't aimed at the book.
This exchange turned into a waste of time for both of us, I already said my piece in the first reply, if anyone wants to think further on the subject than what the book is preaching, that's up to them. You can have the last word if it makes you feel better or "right".
It's just a matter of perspective. You're pulling an extremist case just to invalidate the point of the book which is ok but it doesn't make you correct. You cannot deny being bitter, that post where you generalized attractive people to take the worst case opinion out of that perspective just proves it.
>You can have the last word if it makes you feel better or "right"
Lmaoing at people still using that "y-you can have the last word" as a protective measure for their ego like fricking 10 year olds that learned their rhetoric from 11 year olds.
Frick off you pussy b***h ass Black person.
Cringe
I keep to the rule of in-game stuff only.
Nothing good comes from bringing real life into MMOs. Real world item trading brought gold farmers and bots. Scam artists are getting so refined that they play you for weeks just to rob you as a part of their paycheck, business as usual.
The era of a sociable world was dead when the wild west was killed.
Rope
I've had to cut people off because I've gotten drunk and admitted to this shit, you just gotta keep finding new people until you lose em again.
Because you're a pussy. Overcoming shit like this is what creates real friends but where is opportunity you see only a dead end and break it off.
>i admit to an extent being a clinically depressed fricking loser
>how can you be friends with someone you don't respect?
Do you not see the downward spiral loop here?
Men on average don't care if their friends are losers. But no one wants to babysit their friends.
What?
And men don't want to be babied either.
Just call eachother a loser, laugh it off and back to normal.
>muh respect
You're being a paranoid woman about it, a bit of forced empathy isn't going to kill you, BUT, the way you talk about being a depressed frick after "inevitably getting pushed" is probably making them think you need to be pitied and babied for putting on a brave face.
I don't know you, but I'm assuming this is more or less how you carry yourself in general, which would not shock me if that was the case. This sounds like someone you couldn't be harsh with because they'll retreat into their I'm fine" hole after a round of bants.
troony
I get where you're coming from but i swear i'm not being a b***h about it.
If anything i want more bants and less emotional stuff.
It's just that over time people WANT to get personal and emotional and i'm not going to tell people to frick off fir wanting a deep conversation, i just don't like going into deep personal shit about myself since i'm a NEET.
When i talk about being pushed i'm seriously talking about getting pushed into it through multiple conversations.
Bro you're just insecure because you're a loser. I promise if you were not such a loser you would not care even 10% the amount you do now. Insecurity is truly the most awful trait and the true reason losers are insufferable and not because they are losers.
>Bro you're just insecure because you're a loser.
this
If i wasn't a loser i would have no reason to be insecure.
But i don't talk about being a loser nor do i want to talk about being a loser with friends.
What bothers me is that after hearing someone else's issues the moment i show any weakness i'm stuck in the role of "insecure loser" to them.
>you are an insecure loser
>yup
>You reveal yourself as a loser to your friends
>yeah
>you don't want to talk about being a loser but when asked about what's going on you make being a loser the topic
>sounds right to me
>so your friends start seeing you as who you are
>no this is awful of them
Hey, i'm also a loser NEET and just thought of something, what if you start conversation with "Hey, i'm a loser NEET and spend all my time on [insert game]. You ?" would this work to essentially weed out pity parties/be a shortcut to find whatever the frick is fine with hanging out with a loser NEET ?
Genuinely asking.
I'm like the other guy except i'm a master at not bringing up IRL shit so no one ever knows before i suddenly vanish.
Yeah that would be funny and likable, at least if you did not stutter like an autist while saying it.
>i'm a master at not bringing up IRL shit.
Fricking how though?
People want to talk about irl stuff and their issues and views after a while.
Also, if you say you're a loser instantly, isn't that just inviting pity?
I met each of the five people i whined about in mmos and each was pretty much just one group activity followed by the other initiating more conversation afterwards, leading to talking daily.
Hell, maybe that's the issue.
I'm way too fricking dumb for fighting games so i envy you for that, man.
>each was pretty much just one group activity followed by the other initiating more conversation afterwards, leading to talking daily
Might be it. My only real "mmo" experiences were a handful of those 2000s anime looking, hub based beat em up and hack n slash type games. Asking people for grinding parties seemed quick and to the point as opposed to all those big open world wow clones. Could never get into them.
>I'm way too fricking dumb for fighting games
I am not much better. I just find them fun and they're the perfect amount of socializing for me with vidya.
>You reveal yourself as a loser to your friends.
When pushed to reveal personal information multiple times, yeah.
>you don't want to talk about being a loser but when asked about what's going on you make being a loser the topic.
Nah, mostly just say i'm good an change the topic.
I'm saying i admitted to being depressed or a loser eventually one time each, five seperate times, and they instantly treat me differently, which is messed up.
i'm not going around going "boohoo look at me i'm sad, please ask me but also don't ask me".
I mean outside this thread, i normally don't vent and whine like a b***h, just now.
Why do you bring up frequency? If you reveal one time that you are a cuck then people will forever treat your like that in mind. If you didn't want to be seen as a loser then you should have never revealed it. Now you have to rock that role, you can't just make them forget.
But why though?
I don't pity others for their shit, i don't treat them like weak babies.
Why not just accept everyone has issues and move on?
Other people aren’t as quick to forgive as you anon.
I guess i'm just too fricking cool and zen to have friends then.
Yeah, that's it, thanks anon.
No but literally that’s probably closer to the reality than you’re joking about.
That's extremely flattering and thanks but not everyone is incapable of accepting and respecting friends, right?
You'd have to be a pretty bad friend for that.
It’s hard to find good people honestly. It’s easy to find okay people, but okay people tend to stay just okay people in my experience, really because of what you’re saying. An instinct inside lets me know that this particular person will take this particular thing and try to hurt me with it later. I don’t know if any of this helps, but maybe it’s understandable at least.
Helps understanding.
But you don't need an instinct for that, that's just every woman and girly men.
lmao.
Seriously though this is fricking depressing to read because i feel like i'll always just be an okay person.
Because humans don't even act remotely logical and we have all different experiences and associations that will ultimately shape our behavior. Like one person in your friend group could have a brother that ruined the family for being a filthy NEET loser and that experience will forever negatively color your relationship after you made your reveal.
Yeah sure, that's why you just move on and call it a loss.
But five times in a row?
each time after the other person shared arguably worse shit?
Makes me feel like a crazy person.
My only solution is find boomer groups. A group of older people are more likely to understand that we're here for a good time over using this as a replacement family like younger gamers tend to. At least in my experience.
Yes he is, and and can barely hide it at that.
Maybe, i just never organically made friends with a boomer, feel like they'd talk less.
>feel like they'd talk less
In general yeah, but repetition breeds familiarity at some point with everyone. It's just slower going because most of the time they have other shit to do before getting back to a game. Almost nobody's gonna swap handles the first time you meet unless you both click, but if you recognize a name after a few times, might as well actually introduce yourself.
I don't know what you play, but in my case fighting games usually end up with me having boomer friends because they're quick and force us to interact. Unless you're a chimp who gets mad at losing all the time, it's easy to make some light conversation in between waiting for your turn.
I haven't left the house in nearly three years now and started playing WoW again because of SoD. Met a lot of "nice" people but its all surface level, never going to achieve the deep meaningful relationships you can achieve in person. I've started playing games with some of them outside of WoW too but our discussions always revolve around vidya, which is fine buy me.
Lie.
Do NOT discuss your problems, they don't and will not care. View the internet as a means for entertainment, that includes interactions with others. If someone is ruining my/their buzz they will cut you out fast.
Depressing.
Why does a what I assume is a manga about high school boys use にて instead of で?
dunno, bro, just became frins of friends of friends
if you don't have that, you can try discord, but that seems to be a slippery slope, maybe try teamspeak to avoid all the grooming
Making friends is easy as frick, even if you're autistic. What's difficult is maintaining them.
>Making friends is easy as frick,
where
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Enter GODJIMA
Who
REPEATING DIGITS
I REPEAT
REPEATING DIGITS
I REPEAT
REPEATING DIGITS
>making friends online
What are you, a groomer?
I just play with my teenage sister and the friends she brings along
You sound like you always were desperate to make friends and that's the thing that makes you off-putting. You have no respect for yourself, so you can hardly expect anyone to have any for you.
Why would you be put off by someone wanting to be your friend?
They're not a computer virus.
Like I predicted before, you're completely unaware why. You remind me of that one guy who lived in the US but had Ukrainian parents. He was similar to you in his obliviousness, but I took a liking to him.
You what mate?
Are you high?
OP Didn't give much of an indication of being desperate or needy, just said people are quiet and don't want new friends.
Can't just assume he's unhinged, and now the other dude is spouting some wild shit about a ukrainian guy he knows like anyone knows what he's talking about.
>subhuman reminds someone of subhuman
absolutely shocking
They are probably talking about coming off as desperate and needy instead of letting the relationship develop organically due to being naturally compatible.
ever since matchmaking became a thing I stopped talking to people. I still have friends from playing half-life mods and stuff but we've all grown older and play different games now
ACTUAL friends require time and work. You need to put in your fair share of commitment over years through good and bad times. Most people don't know the difference between a friend and an acquaintance.
>see my HS friends once a month max because they all work blue collar jobs and are usually too tired or busy to ever do anything on a weekend
>didn't make friends at all in university because of covid and also because I was a commuter and missed out on the university experience
I feel like I seriously fricked up.
Is it possible to make new friends in your early 20s? It seems like everyone already has an established friend group and no one ever wants to expand their circle
Your last good option is finding a workplace with people your age, and preferably your interests. For me it was getting hired as a programmer to a big company. Small companies usually only hire already experienced people or seniors since they focus on quality over quantity, but big companies hire juniors in batches and train them together (since it's more efficient) and that's how I made 2 friends that I still talk to even after leaving the job.
Haven't found any good places to make friends after that now that I'm in my 30's, every new job afterwards was filled with boomers who already have families and want to keep workplace as work and nothing more. Conventions didn't work for me because they're one-time things and most people go there in groups and you need to be charisma man to weasel your way into one.
I literally don’t know how to make online friends without starting shit with them and then 1v1ing them, and then after we’re on each other’s friends list we’re both like, hey. Wanna play PUBG?
Dudes are weird
Why would you want to be friends with a dude throwing b***hfits in a game?
Every time someone wants to 1v1 i just call them a moron waste of oxygen.
This was back in my teens lol. Pickings were slim apparently.
The answer is you were just ugly, as with most people here. That's the unfortunate truth.
I bet you’re right. I bet a decent amount of people here have Henry Cavill syndrome too, fat as a boy, handsome and socially moronic as an adult.
>handsome
Average Gankeredditor is either a fat 400 lbs basement dwelling moron which mental illness can be seen for miles or a scrawny little cuck barely different from a woman. No wonder either get ignored
>play random game with voice chat
>have a great time and some good laughs
>play til the early hours of the morning
>I gotta go to bed now but it’s been fun, let’s play again at some point
>______ has added you to their friends list
>accept
>never respond to their messages
>never play the game ever again
Is there a name for this kind of autism?
it's called "a moron"
That’s what my therapist said too
Fear of starting. You're probably subconsciously worried about everything that could go wrong or afraid of the responsibility in starting a new relationship.
fear of rejection
Maybe you’re afraid of letting people in because they would be disappointed in what they find? Maybe you’re scared your ego will be hurt to find that was the peak moment of that group, and you’ll never be able to achieve that feeling again without dealing with inner turmoil?
You don't, people don't have friends anymore.
>apparently everyone is now only talking with buddies on discord
You gotta get out of that mindset. The simple reality is that, nowadays, when people are playing a game, they really just wanna focus on playing the game. People being more sociable in the past was because being able to connect and play with other people at all was a novelty. Now, online interactions are the norm, so now what matters is the raw gameplay experience, and if you join,then there's a common understanding that that's what we're all there for.
Nobody's really being distracted, it's just that you don't really stand out anymore unless you're notably charismatic, helpful, competent, impressive, or what have you. The positive is that you don't actually need much in any one of those regards to stand out, and that people usually aren't distracted, but it also means you need to be aware of when people just aren't going to take interest and when you'd be overbearing.
The only big exception is so-called "twitch bait games." Ones that are all about wacky interactions between players, where gameplay matters but more focus than usual is actually placed on the individuals in your lobbies. As much as people like to say those are just for streamers or established groups of friends, you can find plenty of randos that are down to clown, and the nature of those games means that finding buddies is easier.
A man generally has to keep his shit together and deal with it internally. That's just how things are, and all efforts otherwise eventually fail.