>essay is just a bunch of stuff found on Wikipedia and things that everybody knows about >the criticism and opinions feel like the ones made by a teen writting an essay about a book, and in a hurry >gets +1million views
I was watching a video today of a dude heralded as some sort of genius, talking about taxi driver. Not vidya, but in general im just so tired of these guys, he just falls into all of these stereotypes. I should start a channel, just pics, clips, and my voice. I lose nothing. Something causal, nothing serious.
[...]
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The padding is getting out of hand, great background noise for working out but it's getting to be history channel tier
>great background noise for working out
Sitcoms with laughtrack tier
>just pics, clips, and my voice
this guy became a big name for doing literally that 34 years ago, and it fricking boggles my mind that people think facecam is an improvement over a formula that won 15 Emmies, 2 Grammy awards, and got nominated for the Oscars twice.
>essay is just a +15 hour summary
This. This is what I hate. I love longform content, but it has to be more than just a summary. There has to be some input from the author. Critique, theorising, or explanation of more difficult to understand story concepts are a minimum.
>lust provoking thumbnail >one hour of fat white guy staring into the camera with breath of the wild landscapes in the background
>essay is just a +15 hour summary with the conclusion being "it's not bad or good just mediocre"
>half the video is a history of the entire company for some fricking reason >cut to black screen followed by an overexaggerated sigh >video leaves in bloopers and multiple takes for jokes >apologies for pronouncing this name wrong/ I just know I'm going to butcher this! >literally reading the wikipedia verbatim >talking....like...............this >4 hours long
The padding is getting out of hand, great background noise for working out but it's getting to be history channel tier
>thinking man >listens to video “essays” about some moronic product for consoomption >thinking man
I wouldn’t throw stones from a glass house anon.
>followed by black screen and a sigh before continuing
it's so fricking specific but I know exactly what you mean
>This game has changed my life
How paper thin of a person do you have to be that a videogame changes you in any major way
>HOW _______ SUBVERTS EXPECTATIONS >HOW _______ IS GETS AWAY WITH BEING BAD >WHY _______ IS IMPORTANT >_______ ICEBERG
>20 video essay about a subject/level/moment/secret in an iconic popular game >moron spends 10 minutes explaining what Mario/Minecraft/Sonic/Tetris/Pokemon is and starts giving us the life stories of the lead developers as if the people clicking the video weren't already familiar with these things >only 5 minutes of the video is actually dedicated to what the fricking title of the video is about >last 5 minutes is some moronic "motivational"/"introspective"/"inspiring" speech about nostalgia or some gay shit about how video games shaped our lives
lmao it’s all bullshit eh. Every time I gave one of those videos a chance I couldn’t bear to finish them. Guess it’s the proce oaid when you give everyone a computer and some video editing software.
Anyone who claims they were shocked to see a playable female characters in a video game in the 90s and it was such an affirming and uplifting moment is completely full of shit.
It's like this crap going on today about how it's about time we had female action heroes. That's been common since the fricking 70s. That was half a century ago. The fact that most of them are forgotten because their movies sucked doesn't actually erase their existence completely.
Shit like that is just someone outing themselves as narcissistic. Most of those puff pieces are always some grandstanding morons preaching to their choirs and are generally nothing worth reading about anyways.
It’s when they start going off on some weird moral tangent for me. I saw some zoomer one who was ok for 5 minutes but then went on weird and very preachy lecture about not sending death threats. Like I don’t need to be lectured by some kid on how to not be an autistic psycho. I never get recommended this shit anymore anyway, I hit “don’t recommend channel too many times.”
Dude I’ve been lifting for NINE YEARS
and music never gets me amped
There’s no a single artist aside from Rob Bailey who makes “gym music”
Everything else is just trash
Infinitely better than the ten minute long videos about anime lore where the person talking manages to say the same two statements in five different ways.
sure but the title was pretty misleading >history of rule 34 >ok so there is no history of rule 34 so..... im just going to talk about the history of smut parodies instead.
>half the video is a history of the entire company for some fricking reason >cut to black screen followed by an overexaggerated sigh >video leaves in bloopers and multiple takes for jokes >apologies for pronouncing this name wrong/ I just know I'm going to butcher this! >literally reading the wikipedia verbatim >talking....like...............this >4 hours long
>picrelated >it's some random dude who made a fake chink twitter account to make a post and then screenshot it seconds later in an effort to be funny
I hate this fricking image so much, have a nice day for posting it. I didn't even read what you said or who you're replying to, and I don't care; just have a nice day.
>half the video is a history of the entire company for some fricking reason
Good >cut to black screen followed by an overexaggerated sigh >video leaves in bloopers and multiple takes for jokes >apologies for pronouncing this name wrong/ I just know I'm going to butcher this! >literally reading the wikipedia verbatim >talking....like...............this >4 hours long
bad
Not vidya but I watched this godawful video essay about how Ghibli portrays nature and something like half the video is just the guy listing and explaining the five sense
>The Best [GENRE] Game You've Never Played (2:14:57) >How [GAME] Broke Me (3:48:22) >You Don't Understand [GAME] (1:05:30) >The [GAME] Iceberg (6:37:13) >[GAME]: A Quick Retrospective (47:58:29)
Iceberg charts were so cool back when they were made by genuine autists with encyclopedic knowledge of a subject. Now all the videos are full of jokes and shit the narrator doesn’t know about because they don’t care about the subject.
>>[GAME]: A Quick Retrospective (47:58:29)
I'm a huge sucker for these. Last year I started listening to the skyrim retrospectives while shoveling snow and now they're my go to pseudo-podcasts for manual labor. I've got the 8 hour Starfield Quick Retrospective lined up for the next time I need to shovel snow.
>video game essay >It's actually about slot machines >It's goes highly in depth about how slot machines work, why people are addicted to them and why they enjoy it >Insight is steadily increasing and the horrors won't go away.
That one was genuinely really good. >Some problem gamblers actually get upset when they win because it takes them out of the game. It breaks the rhythm, people will look at them. This is not what they want. They just want to drown in the world of the machine. To forget everything else and just pull on the lever forever and ever.
Casinos are genuinely evil.
>visit my brother's place >we decide watch some videos >he actually watches shit at 1x speed
How the frick do people still do this? They way youtubers purposefully make videos so drawn out these days with all the unnecessarily long pauses and shit. Talking slow as frick. I can't, man.
your fricking ahdh addled zoomer speedbrain literally cannot parse information if it isn't being rapidly spat at you in the seconds when your attention is held before you inevitably quit the video for another one to watch for a few seconds
i would hate to see how you would attempt to read a book, fricking jesus
Zoomer attention spans are fricked. Eventually they're gonna have panic attacks from people talking at normal speed. ADD/HD diagnoses are gonna skyrocket. They're so desperate to be efficient they're gonna fry their brains.
>Video starts after 3 15 second ads >Guy starts the first 10 minutes describing some other game >Shows random clips of the game you wanted to hear about >Title was just clickbait and now you're just getting a "What I would do if I had all the decision making power" video where he compares 2 completely different games
How do we stop content creators from regurgitating the plot of game and providing nothing of value besides flashy visuals? I clicked to hear interesting takes or thoughts, not plot recap.
>I clicked to have interesting takes and thoughts fed to me, so I don't need to formulate my own
You shouldn't be mocking anyone on what is and isn't good content
No video essay about bing bing wahoos needs to be longer than 30 minutes, and I'm being generous. If it's longer than that then I absolutely guarantee the moron is doing at least one of the following: >reading wikipedia history for no reason >explaining the plot in detail for no reason >going on a tangent about something unrelated >taking wayyyyyyyyyy too long to explain a concept (hint: no concept in a game needs 10 examples and detailed breakdown to explain. You are either bad or explaining or padding)
Recc me some good essays.
I did a bunch of summoningsalt’s mario kart speedrun ones, doom myhouse, and hobbit speedrun history.
I don’t want game reviews/summaries.
yeah sounds like a bit haha >Ganker is filled with the dregs of the internet >thousands of posts dedicated to degenerate pornography >advertisements for pedophilic discord servers >targeted stalking and harassment campaigns >and a video game board with near constant twitter screen cap threads
Haunting Ground is literally the fetishization of a sexualized woman, so it's taking it all out of context- >J.K. Rowling tweet
Isn't this just a joke?
>try listening to someone new, topic seems interesting, give it a chance >less than a minute into the video they make their political affiliation and their views on trannies clear
WHY
>1 hour plot summary >Has regular melties where they whisper scream about minor plot developments they disliked followed by black screen and a sigh before continuing
>I just used it as background noise
You're still a homosexual anon. Background noise is cope. You're just a homosexual that enjoys listening to other men tell you the plot of a videogame. A plot you already know but you need another man to telly you it because you lust for wiener.
>Why do they do this?
A lot of these people were once drama students with dreams of becoming famous actors and shit like that. All these reviews and crap are as much about them putting on their performance as it is the actual review.
Anyone who claims they were shocked to see a playable female characters in a video game in the 90s and it was such an affirming and uplifting moment is completely full of shit.
It's like this crap going on today about how it's about time we had female action heroes. That's been common since the fricking 70s. That was half a century ago. The fact that most of them are forgotten because their movies sucked doesn't actually erase their existence completely.
I'm creeped out by people that have had their lives changed by any type of fiction or celebrities. I strictly view those things as entertainment. I can't fathom how people put them in the same pot as first hand experiences or academic studies when it comes to making serious, leave along life-altering decisions.
>video game "essay" >author makes up his own term and spends half the video defining it which is really just himself jerking off over what a intellectual he fancies himself to be
>Find mildly interesting video topic >Watch it for several minutes until they mention their birth year >younger than me >close video immediately despite being interested in the topic
>Author spends several hours of his already unreasonably long video complaining about a single writer because he didn't get the job he wanted >Author reads the Silent Hill 2 letter and cries >Author makes constant references to how much of a gay troony he is
All of these have happened.
Leadhead made some half decent stuff but then started to go wayyy downhill.
Then when he became a troony the whole channel became shit and now everything is about how much of a troony he is.
>Female talking >close video
I don't associate with incels, I'm married and have a kid but I just can't listen to women on youtube. Most of the time there's someone else who made a way better version of the same video that isn't a woman
>20 video essay about a subject/level/moment/secret in an iconic popular game >moron spends 10 minutes explaining what Mario/Minecraft/Sonic/Tetris/Pokemon is and starts giving us the life stories of the lead developers as if the people clicking the video weren't already familiar with these things >only 5 minutes of the video is actually dedicated to what the fricking title of the video is about >last 5 minutes is some moronic "motivational"/"introspective"/"inspiring" speech about nostalgia or some gay shit about how video games shaped our lives
I find it bizarre when you watch a video with millions of views because it's about something you like, and then when you watch it, it contains factually wrong information. Millions and millions of people now wrongfully informed. I think there's a guy called KingK or something like that, it was his Pikmin video. There were several factually wrong parts in it, but what made me turn it off was when, about Pikmin 2, he said something like 'for some reason the Dolphin can talk now'.
It used to be that when I clicked a video with an unusually high amount of views-something in the millions- it would always be of exceptional quality. Now the higher the views the more moronic the video will be. Zoomer humour and entertainment is such dumbed down, safe and sanitised dogshit.
>Author is Russian and compares several things in the game to the poor social and economic conditions on his country when he was young and still persist today >Author mentions that he was detained by the FSB for his videosl
>video creator is russian >its pretty obvious he is a liberal >somehow his fanbase is flyover chuds from the midwest based on his comments >he clearly doesnt interact with them or read the comments >explicitly mentions he is a liberal as an aside in one of his videos >chud fanbase instantly turns on him, calls him a homosexual, has a stroke explaining how putin is going to save the west and try to dox him to get him conscripted
Always disable comment eastern eurobros. Always.
> video creator is an autistic Russian nationalist who proposes blasting Siberian methane reserves to accelerate global warming tenfold and make everyone except Russia boil, makes videos about what Russian nationalists should learn from Morrowind > falls out with the Russian nationalist fandom due to being autistic > does a 180 and starts posting videos in English about how America's antifa should go harder and stronger, blames "rightoids" for being stupid > only people watching him are other Russian nationalists going "ah good shit my friend, when are you returning to making videos for us though, we miss you man" same guy btw
There's a dude on youtube that makes videos like >Do npcs in [game] do arbitrary real life thing? >Is the carpentry/welding in [game] good?
My guilty pleasure, it's just so outlandish
Does anyone have that DK run where it’s like “can you beat without getting X (collectible that isn’t even in the game)” and spends the entire run just talking about basic shit?
If that's the one I'm thinking of it's a really well done satire video that really made me laugh. Really takes the piss, right down to the nervously performed, completely safe and unfunny jokes. It's the same guy who made the Kong documentary.
>there's writing in the thunbnail which the title is a continuation of
this isn't wise, it is not future proofed. like all the videos with endings telling you to 'click here' where annotations used to be.
this reminded me of that guy who made video tutorials for animal crossing new horizons (and other games but those aren't relevant) and started his videos with >what's up nookers
shit make me laugh my ass off
Not technically a video essayist. >Mod author is in the Russian army reserves >To this day, still hasn't been recalled to active service
I don't know how Scroup is still alive.
Pedo Dan will face: zero consequences from this.
I can't wait for him to return GDQ so he can let's play that autistic girl moviegame so he can go "umm yikes" again
>jakeysnakey or whatever his name is does the “man in front of green screen thing” >is a musician >Manley Reviews does the same thing >is also a musician >Honest Content does it too >is also a musician
Why is this common? I mean it’s not super common, but three times with identical jokes and personalities is weird
>Video is about/vaguely alludes to a nationality or something enjoyed primarily by a certain nationality, usually made by an American >"AS AN x I find this y
Australians do this shit all the time
>people beat dark souls at level 1 / 1 hp / broken straight sword blindfolded on a dancepad while reciting indian poetry >ok but CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITH WHIP ONLY >CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITH BOW ONLY? >CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITHOUT SUMMONING? >CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITHOUT SUCKING A VEINY wiener? (FAILED CHALLENGE BUT WE'LL JUST KEEP THE RUN GOING WITH A SEMEN COUNTER)
>Creators older videos >Speaks like a normal human being, isn't afraid to swear >New one >Zoomer/Black person slang everywhere, OH GOLLY GEE WILLICKERS NOT MY SPONSORS CAN'T SAY THAT
>video essay >has the format of a HS level paper >also the guy uses no synonyms or anything so he will repeat the same two words four times in a 30 second segment
for example >the thing about [Item X] is that [Item X] is very powerful, but [Item X] comes at a price. The game starts with player obtaining [Item X], and here I will recite the plot because people only watch these as background noise
>eating with nothing to watch >sure, I'll give a pokemon essay a watch, it's 10 minutes, it must be concise unlike those other padded essays >Why Speedrunners Avoid Master Balls in Pokemon Emerald >ruby saphire and emerald start by being stuffed in the back of a moving van >saving the professor >getting your starter >meeting wally, your father and the evil villains of the game >these villains will be completely different between ruby and sapphire >bla bla bla
what the frick does any of this shit have to do with the master ball? I couldn't believe it, its been 3 days and I'm still mad
Challenge videos that are prefaced with the entire playthrough to that point despite being irrelevant to whatever challenge it is are quickly rising up in shit I despise the most on youtube.
Sadly, 90% of the people who watch video essays are actually just watching it for storytime. They're not there for any sort of analysis, they just want something interesting explained to them
>hear youtubeman say some bullshit >scroll down, surely people will call him out >people basically just admitting they watch these as background noise while they do other shit and jerking off each other on how they all do it
It’s like they literally didn’t go to school lol. Referring back to something earlier in your sentence with a different word or phrase to avoid repetition is such a basic skill.
but right before we start, 93% of you aren't subscribed and it would weeealllyy help my liddle channel if you guys did, I really appreciate it. kay, now on with the vi-
I knew a coworker that rocked Raycons. He was a smarmy homosexual that got uppity about our snack habits, he wanted to institute eating from the cafe only. Immediately ridiculed because we're all adults that know our responsibilities.
It's not even close. The only thing world of tanks has over it is better music and event gamemodes (which are only better because the core of world of tanks sucks)
World of warships has: >Balanced premiums on par with other ships in their tier. >Tiers aren't dominated by a couple cancer super OP FOMO premiums >Ways of obtaining premiums for free. >Better free player experience in general. >Less RNG based design. More consistency. >Ships with many different playstyles including carriers and submarine who play completely differently from the 3 standard ship types. >High tier games are actually fun and not frustrating cancer.
Warships doesn have worse lowtier games on average.
yeah its always weird when i end up seeing a sponsor when i watching youtube on the crapper, its literally the only time i remember these things exist.
>video is actually edited to be watched and not just listened to >video provides meaningful anecdotes >video makes relevant comparisons and insightful use of extracurricular material >video is exactly as long as it needs to be — no more, no less >no plea for likes or subs >no sponsors ever >no cuts to twitter Ganker memes
What’s her name, Ganker? Does it exist?
If someone is bringing in something outside of the topic I want it to be relevant and potentially introduce me to something else I may like. Found out about many great games and manga this way.
>unleashes the death threat boogeyman to mark the internet meanies *crossing* the line
never understood why anyone is supposed to be scared of some fat british kid saying he's gonna kill them when they're halfway across the globe. any random moron can just say "yo ill kill u"
>youtubers have cartoons of themselves that change frames as they talk. Like thinking you're sexy and attractive enough that need to be recreated into a cartoon >fake british accent >they have a giant mic directly in his faces, my mom say why all those men speak to "black dildos" >they are older that my dad >they put annoying sounds: the "Whoosh", MGS alert sound,etc >They want donations in Patreon or youtube, dude, you are a 45-years-old adult, get a job
>they put annoying sounds: the "Whoosh", MGS alert sound,etc
I fricking hate all the fricking sound effects these days. Constant whooshing and dinging and whacking and popping and it’s all the same stock noises.
I hate the overuse of screams and other popular sound bytes >Keemstar scream >Tyler1 scream >The loud 'uuhhhh' sound byte >The guy screaming from a porno, you know the one >'OHHHH MY GOD' >'Bruh' >Anime 'WOW'
I like them but only IF the video maker uses them tastefully
i.e. waiting 20 minutes to suddenly drop a soundbite on you during the climactic section
Nobody ever complained about the Wilhelm scream
I have a normal job and enjoy how i dont need plan, shoot and edit videos every two days. Too bad zoomers think youtube is a career when a real job is more interesting and we are always hiring.
What kind of video essays do you guys want? I too, am sick of YouTube slop and I'm at the point where I feel like I need to start making the content I want to see. I don't want clickbait, I want information related to my interests that is entertaining but not annoying. I am a grown man, I want some substance in the media I consume.
Something with some meat in it. Actual analysis or relation to the real world.
Basically just go watch Steak Bentley's videos. Not even the MGS4 one that everyone likes either because that one has so much summary in it, even if it's still good. The dude is just very good at picking apart whatever he plays/watches.
I hate when they say "More information in the description". Youtube hide videos descriptions after two lines of text and most descriptions are useless, with sponsors and donations. Embed your shitty video in a forum or wordpress post, with step by step instructions and pictures.
The Patreon thing used to bother me much more, but I get trying to make money. But like, maybe just leave it in a pinned comment or something? Don’t waste my time talking about it, especially not every video. I’ll 100% leave. I may just be one person, but I can’t stand that shit.
I hate these formats the most: >The ____ _____ of [game] >[game]: a review >[game]: a retrospective
Just the use of ‘a’ really fricks with me for some reason. Like when a restaurant calls itself an “eatery” or a cupcake place a “cupcakery” got it made me sick just typing that fricking shit
Shame all speedrun youtubers are the same dude other than the rixler, all being nitendo kiddies coveringh the same like 5 games over and over again.
Retro randomly came back recently though, so that's cool
The Patreon thing used to bother me much more, but I get trying to make money. But like, maybe just leave it in a pinned comment or something? Don’t waste my time talking about it, especially not every video. I’ll 100% leave. I may just be one person, but I can’t stand that shit.
I hate these formats the most: >The ____ _____ of [game] >[game]: a review >[game]: a retrospective
Just the use of ‘a’ really fricks with me for some reason. Like when a restaurant calls itself an “eatery” or a cupcake place a “cupcakery” got it made me sick just typing that fricking shit
For me its >Can you do [basic thing] in [really easy game] >can you beat [game] with [the most op strategy in the game] >can you do [literally who fricking cares] in [the only game the youtuber actually likes at all] >i got world record in [game with 0 recorded records]
I also instantly close tab on literally any video where people show their faces or try to do skits. I don't care. Frick off. Could be a 10/10 model. Frick off. Show me the gameplay, talk about why its cool.
>BILLY MITCHELL IS A LIAR
Does anyone actually give a frick about that guy? Why does Karl Jobst insist on getting sued a gorillion times over something literally nobody cares about?
>BILLY MITCHELL IS A LIAR
Does anyone actually give a frick about that guy? Why does Karl Jobst insist on getting sued a gorillion times over something literally nobody cares about?
>Cheaters and liars are mad that they can't live in a world where nobody calls out their shit
That's Karl's fault for provoking Billy by falsely accusing him for being responsible for Apollo Legend's suicide. He basically brought that on himself. Everything he posts online is admissible in a court of law which Billy can and will use against him to defame his character for his defamation suit.
I would not be surprised if Billy pounds him into the dirt in court. Billy's a scumbag, but so is Karl for milking the situation for years.
Why has no one posted about the homosexual youtuber "trend" where everyone copies nakeyjakey, does 'candid' videos on green screens holding a mic and basically copying egoraptor's entire sense of humor circa 2013? I literally see this fricking everywhere now, it's utterly deranged how people are capable of copying directly like this
>egoraptor child humor
game grumps moreso. that shit was a paradigm shift for youtube and made reddit even more shit. funny cause jon and arin shat on lets plays back in the day
>Makes a roaring return to form through Sequelitis where he just goes ballistic on a game for a half-hour >Immediately burns himself out on Megaman and Zelda
so amazing how he had a truly original and popular series that everyone loved and then he stopped making those videos because he would rather make let's play videos
Sequelitis has yet to be topped too. I have not seen video game analyses as funny or entertaining and it's been a decade since the last one. And yet he only made like 4 of those videos. Lazy scumbag he is
yeah watching him play through zelda on game grumps made me think he didn't really feel that strongly towards OOT, but needed to justify a wacky 'take down' of the game and then defend his takes later when people pointed out that he sucked at the game
What I see the most copied is Sseth, annoying since I blocked that channel years ago and don't really want people doing his humour, editing and voice except slightly less edgy
>videogame essay >they have *that* accent
I don't even need to describe it and I think everyone knows what I'm talking about
Fat guy voice?
Eyepatch droll?
'Can't tell gender' voice?
Strong italian, spanish, etc accent, making them borderline uninteligable?
Failed ''''female'''''' voice?
Sounds depressed and apathetic?
Could be tons of shit
>sseth reviews god hand >one of my favorite games >maybe this will attract more attention to it >doesn't at all >there are more videos reacting to his review than reviewing/talking about god hand
>Videogame essay >Its just reiterating the last 15000 videos on a random nintendo game, with fat guy voice or eyepatch wolf style overly dramatic emo voice >They do this for like 3 nintendo games, then remember they don't actually play games and just wanted to be validated for liking toys as a kid, then move on to something else
As someone who makes video essays i kinda hate how people just don't have the patience for introductions nowadays. You HAVE to start the video talking about the main topic, because even a 30 second long introduction will be enough to exhaust the patience of a large part of your audience. I feel like it compromises the structure and just feels really sloppy, but you kinda have to do it
Blame other creators for poisoning the well
With no reason to do a proper introduction that actually outlines their thesis, people do moronic shit instead, and I don't want to sit through moronic shit to get to what your video was purporting it would show me
I don't mean to sound cold there, I just got no reason to take a chance every time I want to watch such a video, I get burned enough as it is
>start of the video cuts to a scene in the game just before a major turning point in the story or on the verge of the climax with no context >explaining the situation in a deliberately confusing manner and purposely not including certain details as to not spoil anything, just attempting to grab your attention and tease the peaks to comes >cuts to a black >"But I'm/we're getting ahead of ourselves." >cuts back to the start of the game
Frick off, instantly close that shit
I legitimately don't know what separates a popular video essay from an unpopular one. I have watched so many excellent video essays with very few views, and so many bad ones with millions. Writing quality, audio quality, editing, it almost always feels interchangeable between the sucessful and unsucessful ones. I guess it's all about choosing a popular topic.
Choosing a popular topic.
Simply being lucky enough for the algorithm to promote you once. Once you're succesful people will click your video simply because other people did and so on.
Having a good voice.
Looking good. Not talking about women. People are more likely to pay attention to attractive people even off the same gender, or at least people putting in effort.
Good sense of humour; if you don't have that just copy someone else.
Having someone like Penguin00 react to one of your videos and effectively send thousands of his underaged fans to click on it.
There was a good series of videos about Jak that got basically everything right except the chick who made them was borderline whispering everything which made them by far the least viewed reviews on youtube, seem to be deleted now though. Literally just had to talk clear and would have seen success.
Which video led to your hiding sseth? For me, it was eventide..evernicle...evincle...
None. I just don't find his brand of humour to be very amusing and he kept covering games I already played (CDDA, Elona, QuD, Amazing Cult Sim) so he'd keep popping up. Not really worth hatred when its like 2 clicks to permanently remove the guy from my screen.
His reviews were always over stating very simple mechanics to hype up things that are in actuality very simple and repetitive and make them sound more amazing than they are while constantly doing /misc/ jokes but I'm not american so I don't really care about anything he was saying
Good for amusing bandwagoners who care more about being part of [popular thing] than actual gamers
Seethe is a joke reviewer, nothing he says is serious, except the shit about his dad's yellow fever. If you play a game on his recommendation, you fell for a joke, like wimp low.
>How X broke me >Why X is terrible >X needs to stop >X did the unthinkable >X shouldn't exist >X made me upset >Don't play X >This is your last chance to play X
>video essay is two hours long in 3 parts >video is full of well thought out arguments that focus on the game and no history of the series unless relevant to the topic at hand >comparisons with older entries and why they worked better to show that there is a decline in quality and not just pure subjective complaining >shares thoughts on how they could work better if changed in specific way >shows major plot holes with lots of evidence as to why while making fun of the writers in a humorous way
>third worlders or recent immigrants doing english-language videos in their dogshit accent
I'd read your fricking articles or whatever, just please STOP TALKING
That guy that does those "Aesthetics of X" videos pisses me off
he also puts a period at the end of his titles
why
thats fricking stupid, its just a title, not an actual fricking sentence
Maybe thats just autism fricking with me
Stupid accent too
>youtubers have cartoons of themselves that change frames as they talk. Like thinking you're sexy and attractive enough that need to be recreated into a cartoon
fricking hate this so much
It's bad enough he probably commissioned some gay to draw several different frames with le hecking funny expressions
but i also have to picture him editing his video and copypasting all these cartoons of himself into his editing timeline and somehow not feel an ounce of shame
These are miss or miss harder >Miss
It looks like you'd imagine the dude talking to look (this is never the case) >Miss harder
Furry >Miss harderer
Furry twink (its a deep voiced black man talking) >Miss hardererer
Anime teen girl (its a grown ass man talking, doesn't even try to sound like a girl) >Miss harderererer
Anime teen furry girl (male) and its a male trying to sound female behind the mic >Miss harderererererest
You can't even tell what its supposed to be because they drew it themselves in MS paint and its not even got that MS paint soul
a true sign of times, back in my days fricking everyone used anime girls as their pfps or custom models in gmod and stuff, let alone the vrchat wave. no troon accusations or anything, everybody openly accepted that behind that anime girl with huge breasts is a 20+ guy. if somebody is bothered by this then i label him as a zoomer and thus his opinion is irrelevant
>but i also have to picture him editing his video and copypasting all these cartoons of himself into his editing timeline and somehow not feel an ounce of shame
If you're making youtube videos for the world staring yourself you're probably at least somewhat of a narcissist and narcissists don't really feel shame.
These are miss or miss harder >Miss
It looks like you'd imagine the dude talking to look (this is never the case) >Miss harder
Furry >Miss harderer
Furry twink (its a deep voiced black man talking) >Miss hardererer
Anime teen girl (its a grown ass man talking, doesn't even try to sound like a girl) >Miss harderererer
Anime teen furry girl (male) and its a male trying to sound female behind the mic >Miss harderererererest
You can't even tell what its supposed to be because they drew it themselves in MS paint and its not even got that MS paint soul
It's so odd how common that is, using a female avatar with no attempts to match with voice.
The first one I remember doing this was Rebel Taxi, he was doing it since 2010.
are there any good essayists that actually provide something with their videos? only Jacob Geller comes to mind but he does topics outside games as well
>analysis about why hunger in minecraft is bad >opens with 'hunger is an interoceptive feeling human beings experience when they don't consume food for a prolonged period of time'
really feels like the scripts are written by chatgpt. you cannot be a real human being and think that these things need to be explained.
very popular in ai-voiced shorts or those pseudo-documents with tons of stock videos.
>YouTube video >speaker Uses Unnecessarily Hard Annunciation, Stopping Between Each Word, Separating Every Syllable Like They've Never Spoken, Before >also a smug "wise" tone
The only one who can do video essays right is EmpLemon, and that's because he doesn't pad his videos out with filler, and he edits his videos himself giving them his own unique flair, everyone else just pays a video editor, which is why it all feels so samey.
>20 minute video on a game I like that not many talk about >check it out >the guy has a lisp >mentions every instance no matter how tiny of "politically incorrect" obviously humorous moment just to show what a great guy he is and how glad he is that we have progressed >close video >downvote >blacklist channel
>the guy has a lisp
Greek Critique. I donsht shee how shomeone cansht shpeak likesh thish for sheveral hoursh at a time wishout runningsh ousht of shpit in their bodiesh.
As much as those do in fact feel repulsive, I somehow enjoy full-on spergs about the entirety of content regarding live action kid/teen comedy shows from disney channel, nickelodeon and stuff like that, and those include explaining behind the scenes stuff like writer/director dramas or obscure brand collabs.
>criticisms expressed about a game in the video aren't even actual critiques or arguments, but are instead just the homosexual describing what is literally happening in a sarcastic fake drunk voice with forced stuttering
This hack shit is absolutely everywhere.
>watch guy do video essays >normal videos >suddenly 8 hour long video essay >extremely modified voice >essay is about how gay roman mafia controls us >deletes channel a week later and vanishes off youtube
I listen to this slip when I'm going to sleep. As long as they have a soothing voice and aren't annoying I don't need high quality content. I just like hearing about games while resting.
Recently I've been listening to those long DYKGaming clip compilations.
Can we share some channels we actually enjoy before the thread dies?
Cody's Lab (chemistry stuff)
JoergSprave (weapon stuff, also known as Slingshot Channel)
Scott's Thoughts (pokemon autism)
Solidrev (gaming from a very normen perspective, but I like the guy)
Summoning Salt (speedrunning history)
ymfah (the only actual good channel of "can you beat X with only Y?")
>guy makes decent videos in a niche area >notice in a video hes got painted nails >know immediately where this is going and stop watching >check in after a few months to see >dude in full make up with long hair, looks terrible >can't even enjoy the video since a good chunk of it is him looking directly at the camera
>decide not to judge book by its cover when the dude's nails are painted black >fast-forward three hours >dude figures it's deep enough into the video that statistically he can just say whatever he wants now and it won't affect views or the algorithm much >starts complaining about men writing and drawing women in the 90s, and about gamers having the gall to push back against a pozzed company for adding trannies and a Gamergate reference to a 15yo game
I hope someone rapes you with a chainsaw, Grimbeard
>Grimbeard
you know he's fricking trash when moldman does a better video on a niche game and he fricking sucks when it comes to gameplay
just compare their videos on Daemonica, Ross actually says something of value on that game which made me interested in playing it, while Grimhomosexual said nothing interesting about it to make me check out the game
If you want to see someone fall off the crazy horse on video you should watch Shammy's Outer Wilds review. It's not good or anything, just interesting that someone would be so unhinged to release a video like that and not think everyone believes it to be a suicide note.
>video essay/review is just filled with "funny" shots/clips/voiceclips from unrelated nintendo games, TV show/marvel movie twitter memes, or entry-level dubbed shounen anime
The only purpose of videogame essays is putting me to sleep, hearing some moron rambling about a game I don't care about works better than any melotonin or benzos ever did.
I'm going to leave the domain of videogames for a second and confess that I am a sucker for some of the more clickbaity real life horror and true crime interrogation youtubers.
Why do they all insist on writing like a high-schooler trying hard to score an A in english class? The verbosity, poor metaphor and ham-fisted descriptions never fail to cringe me sideways. The cop-out answer would be that they write like they're on that level, but I feel like there's something more to it. Something purposeful for algorithmic manipulation.
I think it comes of as especially jarring because for the most part the writing in these videos are paraphrasing or direct quotation of case facts and statements which are mostly bereft of any creative embellishment. When they then reach parts with the oppurtunity to speak freely and personally about the subject they force their "brand" at every cost in order to justify the video content as their own creation and not just a narration of the work from journalists/authors/historians set to footage from photographers.
Nexpo comes immidately to mind when thinking of examples of poor interjections like these.
>Something purposeful for algorithmic manipulation
I think you're overthinking it and that it could be explained by a form of survivor bias. Only the lowest common denominator channels will rise to the top, unintentionally
>The horror of videogame >just retells the entire plot of the game while pointing out random things that were eerie (but mostly the devs didn't have time to fix)
>video essay from a Black person putting on stilted white man voice/affect >still real enough to approach the subject matter from a homie perspective
He aight.
Honestly just lift everything from Running Shine. He seems to have his head on his shoulders when it comes to critiquing how everything in a game comes together, like menus in YIIK or the pacing of Klonoa 2. Don't forget to do shit you like and draw from your own experience playing video games. Just write and consider your public speaking skills at the same time.
Either have a good voice or hire a voice actor or get a good AI voice actor. Production values matter for normies which is where most of your clicks will come from, so a good video editor is also important. Having a good, insightful opinion to share is a distant third.
two big ones: >don't facecam
facecam is for self-aggrandizing homosexuals and prostitutes >get a good mic and check your recording to make sure your voice sounds good
self-explanatory
Open with grainy, VHS-era effects and some appropriately low-key music while the credits roll. Then at exactly 22 seconds in, you begin to speak. >For whom it may concern, consider the following:
Read this first so you don't like a bumbling moron like most youtubers. Very few people are naturally gifted at making a point, but at least in the past they recognised this and learned how to do it
Don't bother unless you're a native English speaker with a nice voice.
It's the great filter of online content creation. No matter how good your ideas are it doesn't matter when you're hard to understand or unpleasant to listen too.
>ADS is a bad mechanic for FPS games and you're wrong if you think otherwise >Also Quake 3, CounterStrike and Titanfall2 are outdated and bad games that don't take much skill >Fortnite is actually ok though >anyway let me rant about how Halo 3 is the greatest FPS ever made and how Bungie are geniuses
>all the whinging itt about sponsor reads
What's the problem? You can literally just skip it, moron. Are you upset they're making money doing something fun while you wageslave for pennies? You homosexuals project too hard. You're unwell!
Sometimes my hands are busy and to skip it takes like 20 seconds and now that mind poison has entered my system. Happened to me today and it was quite annoying.
>Installed Sponsorskip >Works flawlessly >Every skip is almost unnoticeable due to pretty much all sponsors being spliced into videos after the fact
It's insane how even the sponsor segments that are "integrated" into the video skip so well that the only reason I even notice the skip is a slight cut out in audio.
I hate how youtube has turned into the ministry of information.
You can't even type the name of a continent or nation anymore in the comments or YT autodeletes it for potentially being problematic.
>video essay >large portion of the screen is taken up by a furry avatar who makes smug faces and had more effort put into its animations than the script
It's gotten to the point that if such an avatar pops up, I instantly close the video and never watch anything from that channel again.
>channel with over 2million subscribers >doesnt use thumbnails >no clickbait, still titles videos [video series] episode:x >doesnt have a patreon or sponsors >never begs for likes and subscriptions >does youtube as a hobby and disinterested in making it a career >keeps real life completely separate from online presence, no one even knows what he looks like >been making the same content for over a decade
It's like finding a unicorn these days but content creators like this still exist
The YTer behind the 10+ hours TES videos makes some of the worst content out there. Literally just hours of reading the wiki, with the occasional personal opinion and a mini essay on why it's objectively true (it just is, okay?!).
Yeah I don't know why the dude has so many views
It's the most dull shit possible most of the time. There is some good stuff in there occasionally, but most of the time it's the wiki.
>Yeah I don't know why the dude has so many views
Bots and or algorithm frickery. Most people don't know just how cheap botting is.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/jaymcgregor/2016/12/14/how-we-bought-reddit-for-200/
>nasally nerd voice >gay lisp >literally just explains his playthrough step by step as a review, becomes obvious he's bad at it and moronic but is supremely confident the game is wrong
To be fair, the amount of times I've argued on Ganker with someone only for them to drop a "I never played but I watched [homosexual]'s playthrough" like 5 posts in is distressingly frequent as well
Yeah, Tim Rogers is the best. People should really watch his video on Doom or something first though, his style is very different from everyone else so going in on a game that you have played before will make it less jarring
They're the best part of his videos, and his Doom review is when they first showed up meaningfully. His videos keep doing it from that point on, and I thought it was done best in his CP2077 video when he was talking about crunch. His Bokunatsu review is basically at that level for the entire time though, it's my favorite video on Youtube now. The entire video is just a leadup to that section, really getting into it in the back half of part 4.
>CP2077 video
He just went and made a bunch of unlisted videos you had to click on a playlist in the first video's description to find, weird move but I guess it culled idiots from seeing them
I wonder what he's making next, I think he said something about Final Fantasy IV?
His next video is LA Noire, he said so in one of his videos. We don't know the order of the videos after that, but it's going to include FF4 and Earthbound.
He made the CP2077 video like that because Youtube wouldn't let him upload the full ~11 hour video for some reason and he didn't want half the videos on his channel to be the CP2077 review.
5 months ago
Anonymous
Any idea when any of this is happening?
5 months ago
Anonymous
Nope. I check in on his streams every so often and he hasn't said anything about it that I've seen. Based on how he made his old videos he makes them somewhat concurrently, so the new ones must be pretty substantial. For example, he was in Kansas doing the Bokunatsu review a month before the CP2077 review was released.
It does suck that it's taking this long though, we're on 15 months here when at one point he was making them in 2-3. I'm sure that making a video like the Bokunatsu one is ungodly difficult though, there is no way I could make something like that.
5 months ago
Anonymous
Yeah, from how he described it he works the same kinds of hours as the Rockstar code monkeys did making those games lol
5 months ago
Anonymous
Yeah. There is a good shot that this next video taking longer to come out is because he doesn't want to work 80+ hours a week making them anymore.
>CAN YOU BEAT [game] WITHOUT COLLECTING ANY [game's main collectible]??? >Gets to a point where it's impossible to continue >"buuuuuuut we're gonna ignore that and keep going anyway"
for me it's how over-dramatic every single fricker is nowadays >it's unsettling that [thing that is not fricking unsettling at all] >the fact that [overly reaching point] happens is terrifying
the trend to over dramatize things by labelling them as creepy or scary makes me mad to no end.
I watched a guy review all the armored core games and he was so incredibly chill throughout all of it, I loved it. The guy treated it like if you were explaining the missions and story and gameplay and whatnot concisely to a friend instead of trying to hook the interest of an ADHD child
>video game essay >"but to understand [game], we need to go back to where it all started" >tells the entire fricking history of the company
Fricking hate this shit, useless padding
Daily reminder that this video essay trend is happening because clickbait on YT has gotten so bad, that YT now pays for watch time, no longer just for clicks. If YT were to change their ad revenue policy again, all these vapid essays would stop getting made immediately.
>It is bad that people get paid for making videos audiences actually want to watch instead of clickbaiting us
Don't even defend yourself please. Just move on from this moronic opinion.
so..are there any good youtube channels? I just want videos that are no more than 30 minutes that actually have something interesting to say and aren't just mindless background noise
I liked this guys glitch videos, sadly he only made like 4 before getting cancelled. They're very concise and actually answer the questions asked at the beginning
>dude makes semi-decent analytical videos about Kingdom Hearts >dude makes one for birth by sleep >watch it >video dude quotes an interview with Nomura making an off-hand comment about how Sora's soul was originally bonded with Ventus before birth, but they changed that to be just after his birth to better fit with western conceptions of soul and life before/after death >"WOAH, I CAN'T BELIEVE WESTERNER CHUDS ARE SO SMALL MINDED AND BIGOTED THEY HAD TO CHANGE THEIR STORY. GUESS WE HAVE A LOT OF GROWING UP TO DO, HUH?!" >immediately close the video, unsub and click "never recommend videos from this channel"
>click on video >ESL with euro accent >turn off video before they even finish the first sentence
I know it's fricked up but it's the truth. The only ones who get away with this are Swedes because they are so Americanised it's hard to even tell they're ESL most of the time
Same.
t. Euro
There's also one specific kind of American accent that sounds like the person speaking has multiple golf balls in their mouth, that I absolutely hate. Americans probably know which one I'm talking about.
>essay is just a +15 mins summary with brief "opinions" inserted here and there
>essay is just a +15 hour summary with the conclusion being "it's not bad or good just mediocre"
>essay is just a bunch of stuff found on Wikipedia and things that everybody knows about
>the criticism and opinions feel like the ones made by a teen writting an essay about a book, and in a hurry
>gets +1million views
I was watching a video today of a dude heralded as some sort of genius, talking about taxi driver. Not vidya, but in general im just so tired of these guys, he just falls into all of these stereotypes. I should start a channel, just pics, clips, and my voice. I lose nothing. Something causal, nothing serious.
>great background noise for working out
Sitcoms with laughtrack tier
>just pics, clips, and my voice
this guy became a big name for doing literally that 34 years ago, and it fricking boggles my mind that people think facecam is an improvement over a formula that won 15 Emmies, 2 Grammy awards, and got nominated for the Oscars twice.
Limitations produce creativity
>video game review
>"is this game worth it? ultimately it will come down to your preferences"
Hbomberguy's video on Deus Ex. I vowed not to watch overlong video essays but i genuinely like this one. Watched it twice actually. Very comfy.
He doesn't just summarise. He very clearly critiques aspects of the game.
>essay is just a +15 hour summary
This. This is what I hate. I love longform content, but it has to be more than just a summary. There has to be some input from the author. Critique, theorising, or explanation of more difficult to understand story concepts are a minimum.
The padding is getting out of hand, great background noise for working out but it's getting to be history channel tier
How the frick are you listening to anything else but the most energetic frickhard music while working out?
It's called the thinking man's workout.
>thinking man
>listens to video “essays” about some moronic product for consoomption
>thinking man
I wouldn’t throw stones from a glass house anon.
lmao it’s all bullshit eh. Every time I gave one of those videos a chance I couldn’t bear to finish them. Guess it’s the proce oaid when you give everyone a computer and some video editing software.
Shit like that is just someone outing themselves as narcissistic. Most of those puff pieces are always some grandstanding morons preaching to their choirs and are generally nothing worth reading about anyways.
>I wouldn’t throw stones from a glass house anon.
Just because you're low IQ doesn't mean we all are
>calls others low IQ while listening to moronic essay videos
Very rich
It’s when they start going off on some weird moral tangent for me. I saw some zoomer one who was ok for 5 minutes but then went on weird and very preachy lecture about not sending death threats. Like I don’t need to be lectured by some kid on how to not be an autistic psycho. I never get recommended this shit anymore anyway, I hit “don’t recommend channel too many times.”
Dude I’ve been lifting for NINE YEARS
and music never gets me amped
There’s no a single artist aside from Rob Bailey who makes “gym music”
Everything else is just trash
Play the max anarchy soundtrack
I listen to Vault Archives at the gym
Listen to Kingdom Hearts music
Infinitely better than the ten minute long videos about anime lore where the person talking manages to say the same two statements in five different ways.
>lust provoking thumbnail
>one hour of fat white guy staring into the camera with breath of the wild landscapes in the background
Thank you for saving me the ten seconds I would’ve spent clicking on and then immediately off that video.
This is a terrible example it’s actually a good relatively well paced video about a fairly novel topic
sure but the title was pretty misleading
>history of rule 34
>ok so there is no history of rule 34 so..... im just going to talk about the history of smut parodies instead.
that video was actually interesting, as a coomer
>half the video is a history of the entire company for some fricking reason
>cut to black screen followed by an overexaggerated sigh
>video leaves in bloopers and multiple takes for jokes
>apologies for pronouncing this name wrong/ I just know I'm going to butcher this!
>literally reading the wikipedia verbatim
>talking....like...............this
>4 hours long
....like...............this
God I fricking hate this
>set the video to x2
>sounds like a normal human
>picrelated
>it's some random dude who made a fake chink twitter account to make a post and then screenshot it seconds later in an effort to be funny
I hate this fricking image so much, have a nice day for posting it. I didn't even read what you said or who you're replying to, and I don't care; just have a nice day.
>"Don't... forget to...... like........ and subscribe........ Remember to............ ring............ the bell............... Please consider....... supporting....... me....... on Patreon..............
>half the video is a history of the entire company for some fricking reason
Good
>cut to black screen followed by an overexaggerated sigh
>video leaves in bloopers and multiple takes for jokes
>apologies for pronouncing this name wrong/ I just know I'm going to butcher this!
>literally reading the wikipedia verbatim
>talking....like...............this
>4 hours long
bad
....like...............this
I fricking hate how Nexpo does this shit, so damn... annoying
>high view count
>low subscriber count
>gay video title
>moronic video length
AVOID.
>talking....like...............this
Supereyepatchwolfbros, how will we ever... recover....... from this?
Holy frick i hate the
> im sorry for butchering the names XDd
I don't mind it if it's sincere. I take it over being ignorant and proud of it.
Not vidya but I watched this godawful video essay about how Ghibli portrays nature and something like half the video is just the guy listing and explaining the five sense
?si=C15l-L1bsH0VjWXi
God I hate video essayist
>The Best [GENRE] Game You've Never Played (2:14:57)
>How [GAME] Broke Me (3:48:22)
>You Don't Understand [GAME] (1:05:30)
>The [GAME] Iceberg (6:37:13)
>[GAME]: A Quick Retrospective (47:58:29)
Iceberg charts were so cool back when they were made by genuine autists with encyclopedic knowledge of a subject. Now all the videos are full of jokes and shit the narrator doesn’t know about because they don’t care about the subject.
>>[GAME]: A Quick Retrospective (47:58:29)
I'm a huge sucker for these. Last year I started listening to the skyrim retrospectives while shoveling snow and now they're my go to pseudo-podcasts for manual labor. I've got the 8 hour Starfield Quick Retrospective lined up for the next time I need to shovel snow.
if you like those you should listen to the research streams he did
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL8DlBi8nE56zESRp2ETC3AwgQo5_FceHG
I'm not watching your dead stream you uncharismatic frick.
>NOBODY understands x
This is the worst. THE WORST.
>Video game "Essay"
>Hyper consumerist that buys every new installment and cosmetic blames capitalism for the world
>video game essay
>It's actually about slot machines
>It's goes highly in depth about how slot machines work, why people are addicted to them and why they enjoy it
>Insight is steadily increasing and the horrors won't go away.
fine, I'll watch it, link me up
https://yt.cdaut.de/watch?v=jQIHqkudgNY
post a normal fricking link, jesus
it was quite fricking funny to me when this guy started malding over Super Mario Odyssey in order to shill shoot-em-ups
>first 30 seconds of opening
holy kino. Please tell me this video is as good as the intro
i know which guy you're talking about, that guy is kino
I liked his AI video a lot, it's unnerving how prolific those slop machines are becoming.
That one was genuinely really good.
>Some problem gamblers actually get upset when they win because it takes them out of the game. It breaks the rhythm, people will look at them. This is not what they want. They just want to drown in the world of the machine. To forget everything else and just pull on the lever forever and ever.
Casinos are genuinely evil.
One more time, let's gamburu
>8 hours long
>part 1
>video reviewer splits 10 hour “essay” into parts
>the pretentious frick actually names them shit like part 1: a new beginning
>video game essay
i only listen to pic related when i'm cooking, the rest is complete trash
>visit my brother's place
>we decide watch some videos
>he actually watches shit at 1x speed
How the frick do people still do this? They way youtubers purposefully make videos so drawn out these days with all the unnecessarily long pauses and shit. Talking slow as frick. I can't, man.
There is literally no point in watching videos at normal speed when there's so much intentional padding.
There's no point in watching a padded video in the first place other than for some advertising company to sell your info to amazon.
your fricking ahdh addled zoomer speedbrain literally cannot parse information if it isn't being rapidly spat at you in the seconds when your attention is held before you inevitably quit the video for another one to watch for a few seconds
i would hate to see how you would attempt to read a book, fricking jesus
>reading books when you can just listen to them
at 2.5x speed, i assume
No, normal. Books, movies, shows and actual creative stories are for watching at normal speed. Info dump padded youtube videos are for 2x speed.
why watch the "padded" videos at all if you literally cannot stand watching them
Watching at a higher speed gets through the unnecessary fluff quicker and to the point. "most replayed" is also a very useful feature.
i don't, I click on a video, immediately pause it and read comments to see if its padded shit, its not fool proof but it helps.
>comment section is full of bots spamming scam links
Grim
>Listening to books…
You unironically did not read the book. Your opinion on it means nothing since you were barely paying attention to half of it.
Wouldn't an actual speedbrain prefer books since you can read a sentence way faster than it takes to listen to it?
My youtube recommendations are just animals doing dumb shit so I can't really relate.
All my youtube shorts recommendations are about whales, they always put me in a good mood
Zoomer attention spans are fricked. Eventually they're gonna have panic attacks from people talking at normal speed. ADD/HD diagnoses are gonna skyrocket. They're so desperate to be efficient they're gonna fry their brains.
>>he actually watches shit at 1x speed
The only thing I watch accelerated now is Ninjala episodes.
nailed it 100%
glad he included the random quote bit, it drives me insane kek
?t=120
>Video starts after 3 15 second ads
>Guy starts the first 10 minutes describing some other game
>Shows random clips of the game you wanted to hear about
>Title was just clickbait and now you're just getting a "What I would do if I had all the decision making power" video where he compares 2 completely different games
>HOW _____ BROKE ME
>HOW _____ IS A MASTERPIECE
>HOW _____ SCARES US
God I hate video essayist
>video game "essay" is couple of hours long
How do we stop content creators from regurgitating the plot of game and providing nothing of value besides flashy visuals? I clicked to hear interesting takes or thoughts, not plot recap.
We mock them
>I clicked to have interesting takes and thoughts fed to me, so I don't need to formulate my own
You shouldn't be mocking anyone on what is and isn't good content
>can't even say frick in the first 5 minutes
>"guys I have really interesting takes and thoughts"
have a nice day homosexual ass israelitetuber
>Essayist seems to be some weird religious freak who says words like “heck” and “darn”
>I clicked to hear interesting takes or thoughts
this is where you fricked up
>pretentious pseud thread
booooh, same pic that was used on the gog thread
>Black personmaxxing
cringe
No video essay about bing bing wahoos needs to be longer than 30 minutes, and I'm being generous. If it's longer than that then I absolutely guarantee the moron is doing at least one of the following:
>reading wikipedia history for no reason
>explaining the plot in detail for no reason
>going on a tangent about something unrelated
>taking wayyyyyyyyyy too long to explain a concept (hint: no concept in a game needs 10 examples and detailed breakdown to explain. You are either bad or explaining or padding)
>reading pretentious bullshit about videogames instead of playing them.
this is the cancer killing your hobby, Ganker.
I just watch SummoningSalt and Ahoy.
Based John Lennon coming back to life to become a tech YouTuber.
Recc me some good essays.
I did a bunch of summoningsalt’s mario kart speedrun ones, doom myhouse, and hobbit speedrun history.
I don’t want game reviews/summaries.
>doom myhouse
Jacob Geller makes good stuff sometimes
>rape is literally on the same level as a jk rowling post
mama mia how do these people function
Reads like a funny joke if you ask me
yeah sounds like a bit haha
>Ganker is filled with the dregs of the internet
>thousands of posts dedicated to degenerate pornography
>advertisements for pedophilic discord servers
>targeted stalking and harassment campaigns
>and a video game board with near constant twitter screen cap threads
Check ' um
>a jk rowling tweet
there's no way this isn't ironic
>tweet
Would you say that the spoiler warning is stupit?
It's a one-hour video, I don't know why anyone would waste their time watching it rather than play the game for the first time.
I had to look twice because I glanced at first and didn’t notice.
Christ.
>a J.K Rowling Tweet
Haunting Ground is literally the fetishization of a sexualized woman, so it's taking it all out of context-
>J.K. Rowling tweet
Isn't this just a joke?
It's actually a good boy dog simulator
>Haunting Ground is literally the fetishization of a sexualized woman
That is a coomer's surface level interpretation of the game.
Contrary to popular belief the game isn't "all about rape". It's mostly about a bunch of people being envious of women's ability to create life.
>Rape
>A J.K Rowling tweet
Wow
>try listening to someone new, topic seems interesting, give it a chance
>less than a minute into the video they make their political affiliation and their views on trannies clear
WHY
we're talking about video game youtube essays not video game board threads
>video game "essay"
>1 hour plot summary
>Has regular melties where they whisper scream about minor plot developments they disliked followed by black screen and a sigh before continuing
>followed by black screen and a sigh before continuing
it's so fricking specific but I know exactly what you mean
Does the reviewer also have an villain character that is played by the reviewer that appears during the video? This is important.
I forget the specific channel I'm referring to as I just used it as background noise but no, there was no alter ego
Though it sounds familiar
>I just used it as background noise
You're still a homosexual anon. Background noise is cope. You're just a homosexual that enjoys listening to other men tell you the plot of a videogame. A plot you already know but you need another man to telly you it because you lust for wiener.
Why do they do this? Who told them that was entertaining? Was that ever funny?
I think it was a Nostalgia Critic bit like 13 years ago that unfunny people still use.
>Why do they do this?
A lot of these people were once drama students with dreams of becoming famous actors and shit like that. All these reviews and crap are as much about them putting on their performance as it is the actual review.
if they're old enough to have watched channel awesome and tgwtg "talents" when they were still around, that's probably the inspiration.
>whisper screaming
>always someone with a shitty mic
>This game has changed my life
How paper thin of a person do you have to be that a videogame changes you in any major way
Anyone who claims they were shocked to see a playable female characters in a video game in the 90s and it was such an affirming and uplifting moment is completely full of shit.
It's like this crap going on today about how it's about time we had female action heroes. That's been common since the fricking 70s. That was half a century ago. The fact that most of them are forgotten because their movies sucked doesn't actually erase their existence completely.
How is it any different from a book or a movie changing you?
book good
movie good
video game bad
I'm creeped out by people that have had their lives changed by any type of fiction or celebrities. I strictly view those things as entertainment. I can't fathom how people put them in the same pot as first hand experiences or academic studies when it comes to making serious, leave along life-altering decisions.
>HOW _______ SUBVERTS EXPECTATIONS
>HOW _______ IS GETS AWAY WITH BEING BAD
>WHY _______ IS IMPORTANT
>_______ ICEBERG
>Video is an hour long
>Would be under 15 minutes if the guy spoke like a normal person
This......is why I CAAAAaaan't.....WAtchhhhh....YouTubersssss...
...and that's why that character is greedy and shameless... I don't approve of anything like that... and now let's talk about this video's sponsor 🙂
>video game "essay"
>author makes up his own term and spends half the video defining it which is really just himself jerking off over what a intellectual he fancies himself to be
I can't stand that Eyepatch Wolf guy's voice
He unironically sounds like a onions enjoyer.
Filtered
Stopped watching him when he started making overly preachy thinly-veiled breadtube slop. I'm calling it now, this gay is going to troon out.
>thumbnail has a wojak
>Find mildly interesting video topic
>Watch it for several minutes until they mention their birth year
>younger than me
>close video immediately despite being interested in the topic
>"Why is <video game> so...UNNERVING?!
>Author spends several hours of his already unreasonably long video complaining about a single writer because he didn't get the job he wanted
>Author reads the Silent Hill 2 letter and cries
>Author makes constant references to how much of a gay troony he is
All of these have happened.
Leadhead made some half decent stuff but then started to go wayyy downhill.
Then when he became a troony the whole channel became shit and now everything is about how much of a troony he is.
>Female talking
>close video
I don't associate with incels, I'm married and have a kid but I just can't listen to women on youtube. Most of the time there's someone else who made a way better version of the same video that isn't a woman
>20 video essay about a subject/level/moment/secret in an iconic popular game
>moron spends 10 minutes explaining what Mario/Minecraft/Sonic/Tetris/Pokemon is and starts giving us the life stories of the lead developers as if the people clicking the video weren't already familiar with these things
>only 5 minutes of the video is actually dedicated to what the fricking title of the video is about
>last 5 minutes is some moronic "motivational"/"introspective"/"inspiring" speech about nostalgia or some gay shit about how video games shaped our lives
20 minute**
SWANKY BOX
>Essay about a fricking childre's game is 15 hours long, making it no longer an Essay
I find it bizarre when you watch a video with millions of views because it's about something you like, and then when you watch it, it contains factually wrong information. Millions and millions of people now wrongfully informed. I think there's a guy called KingK or something like that, it was his Pikmin video. There were several factually wrong parts in it, but what made me turn it off was when, about Pikmin 2, he said something like 'for some reason the Dolphin can talk now'.
Patriciantv
you have to love it when they spend hours making a long video and its like they haven't even played it
Wait
guys I think I figured it out, the plot summaries aren't padding. these are just imaginary lets plays
It used to be that when I clicked a video with an unusually high amount of views-something in the millions- it would always be of exceptional quality. Now the higher the views the more moronic the video will be. Zoomer humour and entertainment is such dumbed down, safe and sanitised dogshit.
>Author is Russian and compares several things in the game to the poor social and economic conditions on his country when he was young and still persist today
>Author mentions that he was detained by the FSB for his videosl
>video creator is russian
>its pretty obvious he is a liberal
>somehow his fanbase is flyover chuds from the midwest based on his comments
>he clearly doesnt interact with them or read the comments
>explicitly mentions he is a liberal as an aside in one of his videos
>chud fanbase instantly turns on him, calls him a homosexual, has a stroke explaining how putin is going to save the west and try to dox him to get him conscripted
Always disable comment eastern eurobros. Always.
>try to dox him to get him conscripted
This part is based just cause it's funny.
Warlockracy?
> video creator is an autistic Russian nationalist who proposes blasting Siberian methane reserves to accelerate global warming tenfold and make everyone except Russia boil, makes videos about what Russian nationalists should learn from Morrowind
> falls out with the Russian nationalist fandom due to being autistic
> does a 180 and starts posting videos in English about how America's antifa should go harder and stronger, blames "rightoids" for being stupid
> only people watching him are other Russian nationalists going "ah good shit my friend, when are you returning to making videos for us though, we miss you man"
same guy btw
wtf
>author begins the video with some useless random tidbit like "we all love fighting anime; they have power ups, sick battles and stakes"
There's a dude on youtube that makes videos like
>Do npcs in [game] do arbitrary real life thing?
>Is the carpentry/welding in [game] good?
My guilty pleasure, it's just so outlandish
Does anyone have that DK run where it’s like “can you beat without getting X (collectible that isn’t even in the game)” and spends the entire run just talking about basic shit?
If that's the one I'm thinking of it's a really well done satire video that really made me laugh. Really takes the piss, right down to the nervously performed, completely safe and unfunny jokes. It's the same guy who made the Kong documentary.
Found it
Yeah that's it lol. Anyone who reads this and hasn't seen his kong documentary, watch it now.
>there's writing in the thunbnail which the title is a continuation of
this isn't wise, it is not future proofed. like all the videos with endings telling you to 'click here' where annotations used to be.
>where annotations used to be.
GOD
>watching
Who even does that anymore? Unless I'm watching a trailer I'm just listening while doing something else.
this reminded me of that guy who made video tutorials for animal crossing new horizons (and other games but those aren't relevant) and started his videos with
>what's up nookers
shit make me laugh my ass off
I just ran out of beer.
>retrospective
>it's a lets play as a single video and where every action is narrated
>forced radio host voice
Not technically a video essayist.
>Mod author is in the Russian army reserves
>To this day, still hasn't been recalled to active service
I don't know how Scroup is still alive.
When is this guy's Palworld manifesto about to drop
He'd be the type to seethe about it
no one tell him about endermen
This guy had C P, so he could framed 8c. Worse yet, he's not funny and bald.
Pedo Dan will face: zero consequences from this.
I can't wait for him to return GDQ so he can let's play that autistic girl moviegame so he can go "umm yikes" again
hey what is UP youtube, h-
>jakeysnakey or whatever his name is does the “man in front of green screen thing”
>is a musician
>Manley Reviews does the same thing
>is also a musician
>Honest Content does it too
>is also a musician
Why is this common? I mean it’s not super common, but three times with identical jokes and personalities is weird
>Scroll down to comments
>'The fact that..."
>'The fact that..."
>'The fact that..."
>'The fact that..."
>'The fact that..."
>'The fact that..."
>comment is deliberately spaced out to force you to click see more
>Video is about/vaguely alludes to a nationality or something enjoyed primarily by a certain nationality, usually made by an American
>"AS AN x I find this y
Australians do this shit all the time
whenever i read a comment like this i always wonder if the author is just a mutt who wants to be called anything but a mutt
okay, but can we take a minute to appreciate *thing people already appreciate and understand* because like ???? they slayed!!
Zoomer humour is fricking moronic
>I loved when the Black person began to Black persondishing everything
>mans woke up and chose violence
>can we just appreciate...
70% of YT comments are bots, you cannot convince me otherwise.
I have a channel where I talk about video games at length but it’s not in video-essay format. ‘aking ‘ideos is a lot of fun tbqh
Kys
I will never under any circumstances kms. I will outlive you, outwit you, outlast you. I will dance in your grave.
/qa/ lost
Nah I don’t think you will bro
It’ll be the easiest thing I’ve literally ever done lol
>people beat dark souls at level 1 / 1 hp / broken straight sword blindfolded on a dancepad while reciting indian poetry
>ok but CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITH WHIP ONLY
>CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITH BOW ONLY?
>CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITHOUT SUMMONING?
>CAN YOU BEAT DARK SOULS WITHOUT SUCKING A VEINY wiener? (FAILED CHALLENGE BUT WE'LL JUST KEEP THE RUN GOING WITH A SEMEN COUNTER)
i hate when things are described as "peak"
I hate it when things are described as... everything.
this post is ... everything
Coom ass and suck balls
>Creators older videos
>Speaks like a normal human being, isn't afraid to swear
>New one
>Zoomer/Black person slang everywhere, OH GOLLY GEE WILLICKERS NOT MY SPONSORS CAN'T SAY THAT
I leave/unsub from anyone who even does this once
>bro thought X
>lil bro thought X
>real plumber plays mario for the first time
>Makes exaggerated reaction to everything
>”Oh my god if you jumped in a pipe for real in my line of work you’d get fired on the spot!”
perchance
>install sponsorblock
>80% of video is skipped
heh
>12 views
>Let's Play Game Part 54
>Got it, we won't recommend this channel anymore.
>video essay
>isn't even in essay format
>video essay
>has the format of a HS level paper
>also the guy uses no synonyms or anything so he will repeat the same two words four times in a 30 second segment
for example
>the thing about [Item X] is that [Item X] is very powerful, but [Item X] comes at a price. The game starts with player obtaining [Item X], and here I will recite the plot because people only watch these as background noise
>recite the plot
When I hear that shit I tun it off, I'm here for analysis not zoomer "storytime"
>eating with nothing to watch
>sure, I'll give a pokemon essay a watch, it's 10 minutes, it must be concise unlike those other padded essays
>Why Speedrunners Avoid Master Balls in Pokemon Emerald
>ruby saphire and emerald start by being stuffed in the back of a moving van
>saving the professor
>getting your starter
>meeting wally, your father and the evil villains of the game
>these villains will be completely different between ruby and sapphire
>bla bla bla
what the frick does any of this shit have to do with the master ball? I couldn't believe it, its been 3 days and I'm still mad
>too busy laughing at the t-rex hands to notice that hes using a 49% keyboard
jej
Challenge videos that are prefaced with the entire playthrough to that point despite being irrelevant to whatever challenge it is are quickly rising up in shit I despise the most on youtube.
Sadly, 90% of the people who watch video essays are actually just watching it for storytime. They're not there for any sort of analysis, they just want something interesting explained to them
>hear youtubeman say some bullshit
>scroll down, surely people will call him out
>people basically just admitting they watch these as background noise while they do other shit and jerking off each other on how they all do it
It’s like they literally didn’t go to school lol. Referring back to something earlier in your sentence with a different word or phrase to avoid repetition is such a basic skill.
>video game essay about Vietnam
>It Ain't Me starts playing
>sponsorblock to skip the filler
>DeArrow to remove the clickbait title and thumbnail
simple as
I’m going to start a channel with just gratuitous misinformation. It’s not like I have to source that shit. It’s not a real essay
>Starts with 30 minutes of history of said game
>But first here's our sponsor. Raid Shadow Legends.
Sponsors are dead.
but right before we start, 93% of you aren't subscribed and it would weeealllyy help my liddle channel if you guys did, I really appreciate it. kay, now on with the vi-
DON’T RECOMMEND CHANNEL
>early history
it's creepy how youtube sponsors are limited to only four companies:
>Raid
>streaming service with "educational" videos. (They are old videos of History Channel and The Learning Channel)
>website builder where you cant write HTML directly, only templates. If you want to own your website hire a web-developer or learn to do it yourself.
>VPN, that only allow ipv4, and yours IPs are blacklisted in lots of spam filters
You forgot about pube trimming products
those are based though
>pube trimming
>based
more like cringe
i'll be honest man, my untrimmed groin is pretty hard to look at sometimes
For me its the homosexual ear pods or premade lunches for fat c**ts,
> Sponsored by Nebula
You forgot Raycon earbuds
I knew a coworker that rocked Raycons. He was a smarmy homosexual that got uppity about our snack habits, he wanted to institute eating from the cafe only. Immediately ridiculed because we're all adults that know our responsibilities.
Wallets, Warthunder, World of Tanks, those shitty metal plates, and energy drinks with breasts on them.
I played world of tanks for an afternoon 10 years ago, it was meh
World of Warships is the WAY better game.
It's not even close. The only thing world of tanks has over it is better music and event gamemodes (which are only better because the core of world of tanks sucks)
World of warships has:
>Balanced premiums on par with other ships in their tier.
>Tiers aren't dominated by a couple cancer super OP FOMO premiums
>Ways of obtaining premiums for free.
>Better free player experience in general.
>Less RNG based design. More consistency.
>Ships with many different playstyles including carriers and submarine who play completely differently from the 3 standard ship types.
>High tier games are actually fun and not frustrating cancer.
Warships doesn have worse lowtier games on average.
>quotes carl jung randomly
>"If you kill your enemies, they win"
>-Sun Tzu - "Art of War"
Crazy to think how much time this saved. Imagine if this existed just a few years earlier.
yeah its always weird when i end up seeing a sponsor when i watching youtube on the crapper, its literally the only time i remember these things exist.
Revanced extended has sponsorblock built in.
>Today's subject is XYZ
>But before we get into it like and subscribe
How about I watch the video first and then decide if I like homosexual
>video is actually edited to be watched and not just listened to
>video provides meaningful anecdotes
>video makes relevant comparisons and insightful use of extracurricular material
>video is exactly as long as it needs to be — no more, no less
>no plea for likes or subs
>no sponsors ever
>no cuts to twitter Ganker memes
What’s her name, Ganker? Does it exist?
makes relevant comparisons and insightful use of extracurricular material
Why would you want this?
If someone is bringing in something outside of the topic I want it to be relevant and potentially introduce me to something else I may like. Found out about many great games and manga this way.
Then make a fricking recommendation video.
I don't want reviews to be shitted up with "This is like that one time in that really good anime that you should definitely watch..." crap.
literally only matthew matosis, joseph anderson comes close but he has occasional but firm moronation spew out his mouth from time to time
>video essay about a game developer and how internet meanies have bullied him
>unleashes the death threat boogeyman to mark the internet meanies *crossing* the line
never understood why anyone is supposed to be scared of some fat british kid saying he's gonna kill them when they're halfway across the globe. any random moron can just say "yo ill kill u"
>youtubers have cartoons of themselves that change frames as they talk. Like thinking you're sexy and attractive enough that need to be recreated into a cartoon
>fake british accent
>they have a giant mic directly in his faces, my mom say why all those men speak to "black dildos"
>they are older that my dad
>they put annoying sounds: the "Whoosh", MGS alert sound,etc
>They want donations in Patreon or youtube, dude, you are a 45-years-old adult, get a job
>they put annoying sounds: the "Whoosh", MGS alert sound,etc
I fricking hate all the fricking sound effects these days. Constant whooshing and dinging and whacking and popping and it’s all the same stock noises.
It's just like those annoying radio sounds, things never change
>Try to find a video of a character roasting someone else
>have to dig bizarrely deep to not find the scene with vine booms after every beat
I hate the overuse of screams and other popular sound bytes
>Keemstar scream
>Tyler1 scream
>The loud 'uuhhhh' sound byte
>The guy screaming from a porno, you know the one
>'OHHHH MY GOD'
>'Bruh'
>Anime 'WOW'
>hello darkness my old friend~
>sad piano and violin.mp3
I like them but only IF the video maker uses them tastefully
i.e. waiting 20 minutes to suddenly drop a soundbite on you during the climactic section
Nobody ever complained about the Wilhelm scream
>>They want donations in Patreon or youtube, dude, you are a 45-years-old adult, get a job
Why would they do that? Paypigs pay better than most jobs
>open video
>
*Home - Resonance plays*
>ads on the video
>sponsor in the video
>subscribe to my Patreon
Getting tired of this.
Damn, this guy needs to make money, so arduous
My time is more valuable than your life. I would see you dead for just seconds more on the clock. You are only useful in your capacity to indulge me.
Holy shit, go easy on him, anon… please… for me? He didn’t know… please be merciful!
No,,,,
>He says watching a multi-hour video about Pokemon
Morrowind. The only valid point made was that Todd, who wrote the Imperial Guard quest line, is incredibly subpar as a writer.
I have a normal job and enjoy how i dont need plan, shoot and edit videos every two days. Too bad zoomers think youtube is a career when a real job is more interesting and we are always hiring.
Not who you replied to, but I have a job and a YouTube channel. It’s very doable.
Duh, zoomers b***h about how hard it is to edit a video because they don't know what honest work is
>I am le edgelord, i am le tough guy who knocks your shit up heheheh
You wouldn't dare to speak to anyone like that irl, pussy, lmao
There are who have "creative" ideas of bypass SponsorBlock, screaming the name of the sponsor every five seconds
I am the sole owner of an incredibly popular channel. AMA.
how many minors did you dm
What kind of video essays do you guys want? I too, am sick of YouTube slop and I'm at the point where I feel like I need to start making the content I want to see. I don't want clickbait, I want information related to my interests that is entertaining but not annoying. I am a grown man, I want some substance in the media I consume.
Something with some meat in it. Actual analysis or relation to the real world.
Basically just go watch Steak Bentley's videos. Not even the MGS4 one that everyone likes either because that one has so much summary in it, even if it's still good. The dude is just very good at picking apart whatever he plays/watches.
I hate when they say "More information in the description". Youtube hide videos descriptions after two lines of text and most descriptions are useless, with sponsors and donations. Embed your shitty video in a forum or wordpress post, with step by step instructions and pictures.
>pinned comment is just the sponsor link from the video
Peak small hat behavior
>youtuber has a sponsor in the video
>they include timestamps so you can skip it
The Patreon thing used to bother me much more, but I get trying to make money. But like, maybe just leave it in a pinned comment or something? Don’t waste my time talking about it, especially not every video. I’ll 100% leave. I may just be one person, but I can’t stand that shit.
I hate these formats the most:
>The ____ _____ of [game]
>[game]: a review
>[game]: a retrospective
Just the use of ‘a’ really fricks with me for some reason. Like when a restaurant calls itself an “eatery” or a cupcake place a “cupcakery” got it made me sick just typing that fricking shit
>”HELLO you ABSOLUTE LEGENDS!!!!”
i missed his speedrun vidyas. They were relatively straight to the point.
And now he’s a dramatuber with a god complex
Shame all speedrun youtubers are the same dude other than the rixler, all being nitendo kiddies coveringh the same like 5 games over and over again.
Retro randomly came back recently though, so that's cool
For me its
>Can you do [basic thing] in [really easy game]
>can you beat [game] with [the most op strategy in the game]
>can you do [literally who fricking cares] in [the only game the youtuber actually likes at all]
>i got world record in [game with 0 recorded records]
I also instantly close tab on literally any video where people show their faces or try to do skits. I don't care. Frick off. Could be a 10/10 model. Frick off. Show me the gameplay, talk about why its cool.
>skits
I can't believe people still do this shit. This garbage should have stayed in the 2010s.
What do you mean you're tired of Dark Youtuber interrupting the flow of the video to posture at you and the host, calling you stinky?
What were they thinking!?
I show my face in my videos and I’m at least 50% ugly.
>BILLY MITCHELL IS A LIAR
Does anyone actually give a frick about that guy? Why does Karl Jobst insist on getting sued a gorillion times over something literally nobody cares about?
Karl Jobst is an opportunistic grifter. He doesn't care so long as he gets money.
>Cheaters and liars are mad that they can't live in a world where nobody calls out their shit
That's Karl's fault for provoking Billy by falsely accusing him for being responsible for Apollo Legend's suicide. He basically brought that on himself. Everything he posts online is admissible in a court of law which Billy can and will use against him to defame his character for his defamation suit.
I would not be surprised if Billy pounds him into the dirt in court. Billy's a scumbag, but so is Karl for milking the situation for years.
Karl lives in Australia where defamation law is very in favour of the perpetrator.
Ganker: The Darkest Place On The Internet
How did we get to the point where everyone watches hundreds of 15 second TikTok videos meanwhile YouTube videos are like 4 hours long?
they're both the same side of a single coin
the other side is
Why has no one posted about the homosexual youtuber "trend" where everyone copies nakeyjakey, does 'candid' videos on green screens holding a mic and basically copying egoraptor's entire sense of humor circa 2013? I literally see this fricking everywhere now, it's utterly deranged how people are capable of copying directly like this
They are copying filth frank
good point, filthy frank style of video with egoraptor child humor. Watch sequelitis you'll see what i mean
>egoraptor child humor
game grumps moreso. that shit was a paradigm shift for youtube and made reddit even more shit. funny cause jon and arin shat on lets plays back in the day
So did oneyng
Because we don't intentionally watch bad videos that are ripoffs of bad videos. Lemme guess, you watched Irate Gamer back in the day LMAO!
>Lemme guess, you watched Irate Gamer back in the day LMAO!
His ghost hunting videos were great entertainment.
I think you might like this obscure guy called mister beast, right up your whatever
Those old egoraptor videos were so fricking kino. The Castlevania 2 and 4 ones were dynamite
>Makes a roaring return to form through Sequelitis where he just goes ballistic on a game for a half-hour
>Immediately burns himself out on Megaman and Zelda
so amazing how he had a truly original and popular series that everyone loved and then he stopped making those videos because he would rather make let's play videos
Sequelitis has yet to be topped too. I have not seen video game analyses as funny or entertaining and it's been a decade since the last one. And yet he only made like 4 of those videos. Lazy scumbag he is
yeah watching him play through zelda on game grumps made me think he didn't really feel that strongly towards OOT, but needed to justify a wacky 'take down' of the game and then defend his takes later when people pointed out that he sucked at the game
What I see the most copied is Sseth, annoying since I blocked that channel years ago and don't really want people doing his humour, editing and voice except slightly less edgy
Fat guy voice?
Eyepatch droll?
'Can't tell gender' voice?
Strong italian, spanish, etc accent, making them borderline uninteligable?
Failed ''''female'''''' voice?
Sounds depressed and apathetic?
Could be tons of shit
Which video led to your hiding sseth? For me, it was eventide..evernicle...evincle...
>sseth reviews god hand
>one of my favorite games
>maybe this will attract more attention to it
>doesn't at all
>there are more videos reacting to his review than reviewing/talking about god hand
>it's yet another 20+ minute video in why some forgotten janky/fan translated weeb game from PS1/PS2/PC ENGINE is actually le 7/10 hidden gem kino
>"did you know, [event anyone with eyes saw in the movie]?"
>Videogame essay
>Its just reiterating the last 15000 videos on a random nintendo game, with fat guy voice or eyepatch wolf style overly dramatic emo voice
>They do this for like 3 nintendo games, then remember they don't actually play games and just wanted to be validated for liking toys as a kid, then move on to something else
As someone who makes video essays i kinda hate how people just don't have the patience for introductions nowadays. You HAVE to start the video talking about the main topic, because even a 30 second long introduction will be enough to exhaust the patience of a large part of your audience. I feel like it compromises the structure and just feels really sloppy, but you kinda have to do it
You can do your long gay ass intro, I'm just going to skip and watch the main content.
Blame other creators for poisoning the well
With no reason to do a proper introduction that actually outlines their thesis, people do moronic shit instead, and I don't want to sit through moronic shit to get to what your video was purporting it would show me
I don't mean to sound cold there, I just got no reason to take a chance every time I want to watch such a video, I get burned enough as it is
An introduction is fine, but I completely skip videos that open with snippets from further down the video as their "intro".
>start of the video cuts to a scene in the game just before a major turning point in the story or on the verge of the climax with no context
>explaining the situation in a deliberately confusing manner and purposely not including certain details as to not spoil anything, just attempting to grab your attention and tease the peaks to comes
>cuts to a black
>"But I'm/we're getting ahead of ourselves."
>cuts back to the start of the game
Frick off, instantly close that shit
I don’t want to hear some gay introduction where you blog about how you love Mario so much cos you played it as a kid. No one cares.
>videogame essay
>they have *that* accent
I don't even need to describe it and I think everyone knows what I'm talking about
I legitimately don't know what separates a popular video essay from an unpopular one. I have watched so many excellent video essays with very few views, and so many bad ones with millions. Writing quality, audio quality, editing, it almost always feels interchangeable between the sucessful and unsucessful ones. I guess it's all about choosing a popular topic.
Choosing a popular topic.
Simply being lucky enough for the algorithm to promote you once. Once you're succesful people will click your video simply because other people did and so on.
Having a good voice.
Looking good. Not talking about women. People are more likely to pay attention to attractive people even off the same gender, or at least people putting in effort.
Good sense of humour; if you don't have that just copy someone else.
Having someone like Penguin00 react to one of your videos and effectively send thousands of his underaged fans to click on it.
There was a good series of videos about Jak that got basically everything right except the chick who made them was borderline whispering everything which made them by far the least viewed reviews on youtube, seem to be deleted now though. Literally just had to talk clear and would have seen success.
None. I just don't find his brand of humour to be very amusing and he kept covering games I already played (CDDA, Elona, QuD, Amazing Cult Sim) so he'd keep popping up. Not really worth hatred when its like 2 clicks to permanently remove the guy from my screen.
His reviews were always over stating very simple mechanics to hype up things that are in actuality very simple and repetitive and make them sound more amazing than they are while constantly doing /misc/ jokes but I'm not american so I don't really care about anything he was saying
Good for amusing bandwagoners who care more about being part of [popular thing] than actual gamers
Seethe is a joke reviewer, nothing he says is serious, except the shit about his dad's yellow fever. If you play a game on his recommendation, you fell for a joke, like wimp low.
>How X broke me
>Why X is terrible
>X needs to stop
>X did the unthinkable
>X shouldn't exist
>X made me upset
>Don't play X
>This is your last chance to play X
"How [scene] changed x FOREVER"
>blocks you’re path
Itt: good video essays
>white guy does video analysis on japanese game/anime
>starts talking about politics
>starts talking about gender shit
>starts talking about american race politics
we need something like this for dumb youtube essays
Already exists, called "dearrow"
>video essay is two hours long in 3 parts
>video is full of well thought out arguments that focus on the game and no history of the series unless relevant to the topic at hand
>comparisons with older entries and why they worked better to show that there is a decline in quality and not just pure subjective complaining
>shares thoughts on how they could work better if changed in specific way
>shows major plot holes with lots of evidence as to why while making fun of the writers in a humorous way
>it's an essay about freddi fish
>2 hours long in 3 parts
>Not 2 hours long in two parts (of 4 planned parts)
>Canadian shares their dog shit Indian opinion
Ugh.
>third worlders or recent immigrants doing english-language videos in their dogshit accent
I'd read your fricking articles or whatever, just please STOP TALKING
That guy that does those "Aesthetics of X" videos pisses me off
he also puts a period at the end of his titles
why
thats fricking stupid, its just a title, not an actual fricking sentence
Maybe thats just autism fricking with me
Stupid accent too
Face Full of Eyes
stupid name
He also has a fricking poem as his channel description that pretentious c**t
>youtubers have cartoons of themselves that change frames as they talk. Like thinking you're sexy and attractive enough that need to be recreated into a cartoon
fricking hate this so much
It's bad enough he probably commissioned some gay to draw several different frames with le hecking funny expressions
but i also have to picture him editing his video and copypasting all these cartoons of himself into his editing timeline and somehow not feel an ounce of shame
These are miss or miss harder
>Miss
It looks like you'd imagine the dude talking to look (this is never the case)
>Miss harder
Furry
>Miss harderer
Furry twink (its a deep voiced black man talking)
>Miss hardererer
Anime teen girl (its a grown ass man talking, doesn't even try to sound like a girl)
>Miss harderererer
Anime teen furry girl (male) and its a male trying to sound female behind the mic
>Miss harderererererest
You can't even tell what its supposed to be because they drew it themselves in MS paint and its not even got that MS paint soul
It's so odd how common that is, using a female avatar with no attempts to match with voice.
Nah, people like rev who have a chill voice and use a female avatar are appealing. Too bad he wastes it talking about stupid shit that does not matter
a true sign of times, back in my days fricking everyone used anime girls as their pfps or custom models in gmod and stuff, let alone the vrchat wave. no troon accusations or anything, everybody openly accepted that behind that anime girl with huge breasts is a 20+ guy. if somebody is bothered by this then i label him as a zoomer and thus his opinion is irrelevant
>but i also have to picture him editing his video and copypasting all these cartoons of himself into his editing timeline and somehow not feel an ounce of shame
If you're making youtube videos for the world staring yourself you're probably at least somewhat of a narcissist and narcissists don't really feel shame.
The first one I remember doing this was Rebel Taxi, he was doing it since 2010.
>Like thinking you're sexy and attractive enough that need to be recreated into a cartoon
This is some advanced schizo posting.
>Subtitles appear on a black screen as they speak for epic effect
>NOW. WHAT. HAPPENED. NEXT. CHANGED. EVERYTHING
Cringe as frick
are there any good essayists that actually provide something with their videos? only Jacob Geller comes to mind but he does topics outside games as well
>Video game plot is summarized via 'The Penguins of Madagascar Stop Racism'
>It is somehow accurately represents game events
>analysis about why hunger in minecraft is bad
>opens with 'hunger is an interoceptive feeling human beings experience when they don't consume food for a prolonged period of time'
really feels like the scripts are written by chatgpt. you cannot be a real human being and think that these things need to be explained.
very popular in ai-voiced shorts or those pseudo-documents with tons of stock videos.
At least it's not a tier list or iceberg video.
>YouTube video
>speaker Uses Unnecessarily Hard Annunciation, Stopping Between Each Word, Separating Every Syllable Like They've Never Spoken, Before
>also a smug "wise" tone
The only one who can do video essays right is EmpLemon, and that's because he doesn't pad his videos out with filler, and he edits his videos himself giving them his own unique flair, everyone else just pays a video editor, which is why it all feels so samey.
>Silent Hill 2 vid starts with non Dostoevsky quote
>video essay about Chris-chan
>narrator refers to him as "she" and "her"
>20 minute video on a game I like that not many talk about
>check it out
>the guy has a lisp
>mentions every instance no matter how tiny of "politically incorrect" obviously humorous moment just to show what a great guy he is and how glad he is that we have progressed
>close video
>downvote
>blacklist channel
>the guy has a lisp
Greek Critique. I donsht shee how shomeone cansht shpeak likesh thish for sheveral hoursh at a time wishout runningsh ousht of shpit in their bodiesh.
I hate fricking randomizers run videos. It's not cool, interesting, or unique to turn every fricking game into a regurgitated mess.
>the shockingly WEIRD way <children's show> ended
I would watch this video
they're actual videos made by Jordan Fringe
I already watched this video im such a homosexual
I laughed at this post then I clicked the link and decided to add it to my watch later. It was already there.
I never saw any videos on how the new Animaniacs ended. I had to learn about it on accident during a TV Tropes binge.
As much as those do in fact feel repulsive, I somehow enjoy full-on spergs about the entirety of content regarding live action kid/teen comedy shows from disney channel, nickelodeon and stuff like that, and those include explaining behind the scenes stuff like writer/director dramas or obscure brand collabs.
>click video
>british
>leave 1 star and close video
>click video
>british
>take a big swig from my pint of bitter and get comfy in my lazyboy chair
>star
>criticisms expressed about a game in the video aren't even actual critiques or arguments, but are instead just the homosexual describing what is literally happening in a sarcastic fake drunk voice with forced stuttering
This hack shit is absolutely everywhere.
>watch guy do video essays
>normal videos
>suddenly 8 hour long video essay
>extremely modified voice
>essay is about how gay roman mafia controls us
>deletes channel a week later and vanishes off youtube
The gay roman mafia got him.
I think most of Ganker probably wishes that had a channel. They would probably cave to the same tactics criticized in this thread too.
Obviously, they are all a bunch of uncreative fricks that coom everyday with dicky and will die alone in their own piss and shit
Hey! I resemble that remark!
I made a five hour long retrospective a couple years back and now I'm working on a new one
did people watch the first one
A thousand views. I would've made it even if it had 50, I had fun writing a script and especially editing the visuals
Because self-promoting is gay. It's a thread of talking about vidya essays, not shoving my OC donutsteel videos down anons' throats
Games?
Assassin's creed black flag. Don't know why this gay tried to hide it.
I listen to this slip when I'm going to sleep. As long as they have a soothing voice and aren't annoying I don't need high quality content. I just like hearing about games while resting.
Recently I've been listening to those long DYKGaming clip compilations.
>Can you beat x with/without THIS??
>They can't, but still play the rest of the game as if they had
RIP MittenSquad, he was the only good homie at this
Can we share some channels we actually enjoy before the thread dies?
Cody's Lab (chemistry stuff)
JoergSprave (weapon stuff, also known as Slingshot Channel)
Scott's Thoughts (pokemon autism)
Solidrev (gaming from a very normen perspective, but I like the guy)
Summoning Salt (speedrunning history)
ymfah (the only actual good channel of "can you beat X with only Y?")
(the only actual good channel of "can you beat X with only Y?")
>No actual commentary
>good
That's why it's the best
SsethTzeentach - Literally /ourguy/
Game Sack - A boomer reviews older games, it's great
>Capitalism And Problematic Media Consumption Media Literacy PoopooPeepee Broke Me
>not as good as you remember
>the problem with
>the death of
>the dark side of
>guy makes decent videos in a niche area
>notice in a video hes got painted nails
>know immediately where this is going and stop watching
>check in after a few months to see
>dude in full make up with long hair, looks terrible
>can't even enjoy the video since a good chunk of it is him looking directly at the camera
Hardcore metalhead?
Digibro
This happening to some autist I watch. Hella long hair and randomly apologizing for using a characters other name
Maybe he's just into black metal?
>decide not to judge book by its cover when the dude's nails are painted black
>fast-forward three hours
>dude figures it's deep enough into the video that statistically he can just say whatever he wants now and it won't affect views or the algorithm much
>starts complaining about men writing and drawing women in the 90s, and about gamers having the gall to push back against a pozzed company for adding trannies and a Gamergate reference to a 15yo game
I hope someone rapes you with a chainsaw, Grimbeard
>decide not to judge book by its cover
ever since I decided to judge the bookby its cover I've always been correct
i clicked on this gay Deus Ex review, the second I saw the painted nails, i closed the tab and clicked for YT to not recommend his channel
>Grimbeard
you know he's fricking trash when moldman does a better video on a niche game and he fricking sucks when it comes to gameplay
just compare their videos on Daemonica, Ross actually says something of value on that game which made me interested in playing it, while Grimhomosexual said nothing interesting about it to make me check out the game
I like his stuff, it's like a slow train wreck, every few months I get to see him decend a little further into hell
If you want to see someone fall off the crazy horse on video you should watch Shammy's Outer Wilds review. It's not good or anything, just interesting that someone would be so unhinged to release a video like that and not think everyone believes it to be a suicide note.
>gets in contact with breadtubers (Hbombergoy)
>troons out
crazy how that works
>Black dude with schizophrenia pretends to be 4-10 different video games/game franchises in a 5 minute long unfunny skit
>video essay/review is just filled with "funny" shots/clips/voiceclips from unrelated nintendo games, TV show/marvel movie twitter memes, or entry-level dubbed shounen anime
>series retrospective
>plot summary
>concludes with "it is older now. i like it."
Meg sex
>The PewDiePipeline: how edgy humor leads to violence
>The Normalization Of Heteronormativity and Why It Matters
>Sky High: Disney's Fascist Eugenics Movie
>Saying Black person Promotes Radical Uberneofascist Views. Here's Why.
mfw these are all real videos
>But remember, this is JUST my opinion. And if you disagree, that's okay!
The only purpose of videogame essays is putting me to sleep, hearing some moron rambling about a game I don't care about works better than any melotonin or benzos ever did.
This meanwhile is unironically a pure and simple review.
?si=lF42ztVXiewdzgUj
>But before I explain x I need to first explain y
You will grow to hate this generic line once you realize it .
I'm going to leave the domain of videogames for a second and confess that I am a sucker for some of the more clickbaity real life horror and true crime interrogation youtubers.
Why do they all insist on writing like a high-schooler trying hard to score an A in english class? The verbosity, poor metaphor and ham-fisted descriptions never fail to cringe me sideways. The cop-out answer would be that they write like they're on that level, but I feel like there's something more to it. Something purposeful for algorithmic manipulation.
I think it comes of as especially jarring because for the most part the writing in these videos are paraphrasing or direct quotation of case facts and statements which are mostly bereft of any creative embellishment. When they then reach parts with the oppurtunity to speak freely and personally about the subject they force their "brand" at every cost in order to justify the video content as their own creation and not just a narration of the work from journalists/authors/historians set to footage from photographers.
Nexpo comes immidately to mind when thinking of examples of poor interjections like these.
>Something purposeful for algorithmic manipulation
I think you're overthinking it and that it could be explained by a form of survivor bias. Only the lowest common denominator channels will rise to the top, unintentionally
>The horror of videogame
>just retells the entire plot of the game while pointing out random things that were eerie (but mostly the devs didn't have time to fix)
>millennial writing
Maybe it's that I don't consume crap media but I've never heard any of this dialogue ever.
Reading this makes me feel like im playing borderlands currently
>take Joss Whedon quips
>but make make them every line instead of only sparingly as punchlines
>add twitter/reddit moronisms
That's all gen-xers trying to sell shit to Millennials writing
> a brief analysis of x
> IT'S 8 HOURS LONG
HAHAHAHA OH GOODNESS WHAT FUN
>Star Wars, which came out in 1977
>video shows clip from Phantom Menace
That's the first in the series though?
>video essay from a Black person putting on stilted white man voice/affect
>still real enough to approach the subject matter from a homie perspective
He aight.
I want to make a video essay. How do I ensure its kino?
Honestly just lift everything from Running Shine. He seems to have his head on his shoulders when it comes to critiquing how everything in a game comes together, like menus in YIIK or the pacing of Klonoa 2. Don't forget to do shit you like and draw from your own experience playing video games. Just write and consider your public speaking skills at the same time.
Either have a good voice or hire a voice actor or get a good AI voice actor. Production values matter for normies which is where most of your clicks will come from, so a good video editor is also important. Having a good, insightful opinion to share is a distant third.
two big ones:
>don't facecam
facecam is for self-aggrandizing homosexuals and prostitutes
>get a good mic and check your recording to make sure your voice sounds good
self-explanatory
That explains why content quality drops after a face reveal?
remember to preemptively portray anyone who might disagree with your takes as soijaks and yourself as chad
Take every single trope in this thread and include them in your videos.
Open with grainy, VHS-era effects and some appropriately low-key music while the credits roll. Then at exactly 22 seconds in, you begin to speak.
>For whom it may concern, consider the following:
Actually know what the frick you're talking about and learn how to write an actual essay.
Read this first so you don't like a bumbling moron like most youtubers. Very few people are naturally gifted at making a point, but at least in the past they recognised this and learned how to do it
Don't bother unless you're a native English speaker with a nice voice.
It's the great filter of online content creation. No matter how good your ideas are it doesn't matter when you're hard to understand or unpleasant to listen too.
You don't need to talk english for video essays to get millions of views
>ADS is a bad mechanic for FPS games and you're wrong if you think otherwise
>Also Quake 3, CounterStrike and Titanfall2 are outdated and bad games that don't take much skill
>Fortnite is actually ok though
>anyway let me rant about how Halo 3 is the greatest FPS ever made and how Bungie are geniuses
I've watched like 5 video essays and I don't get the appeal. Am I finally getting too old to be with 'it'?
You're the morons who watch the shit. You've got a right to complain, but consumers drive the market. Remember that. Thanks for the monies, dummies!
They're called epigrams, chud
>all the whinging itt about sponsor reads
What's the problem? You can literally just skip it, moron. Are you upset they're making money doing something fun while you wageslave for pennies? You homosexuals project too hard. You're unwell!
Sometimes my hands are busy and to skip it takes like 20 seconds and now that mind poison has entered my system. Happened to me today and it was quite annoying.
>Installed Sponsorskip
>Works flawlessly
>Every skip is almost unnoticeable due to pretty much all sponsors being spliced into videos after the fact
It's insane how even the sponsor segments that are "integrated" into the video skip so well that the only reason I even notice the skip is a slight cut out in audio.
>iceberg video
>part 1 of 10
>first part is just the first two tiers
>first two tiers is all shit everyone knows
>Click video
>Bong accent
>Close
This doofus and emplemon are the fricking worst
I like supereyepatchwolf and emplemon
STUPID DOG
YOU MAKE LOOK BAD
OOOG BOOOGA BOOOGA
the only acceptable video essay series is this 13 part series about the history of bionicle
I hate how youtube has turned into the ministry of information.
You can't even type the name of a continent or nation anymore in the comments or YT autodeletes it for potentially being problematic.
I hate it too
Serious question: Why do you watch this crap?
What else am I supposed to do while procrastinating and not playing videogames?
>video essay
>large portion of the screen is taken up by a furry avatar who makes smug faces and had more effort put into its animations than the script
It's gotten to the point that if such an avatar pops up, I instantly close the video and never watch anything from that channel again.
Gotta love the folded arms pose when he's talking about something he disagrees with
>pokyimon
Why do zooms say "let's go" every few seconds?
Zooms love to emulate their Black person role models, so they say "LET'S GOOO" because that's what they howl playing Black personball.
Sounds like Hentaiwriter
>author
>channel with over 2million subscribers
>doesnt use thumbnails
>no clickbait, still titles videos [video series] episode:x
>doesnt have a patreon or sponsors
>never begs for likes and subscriptions
>does youtube as a hobby and disinterested in making it a career
>keeps real life completely separate from online presence, no one even knows what he looks like
>been making the same content for over a decade
It's like finding a unicorn these days but content creators like this still exist
The YTer behind the 10+ hours TES videos makes some of the worst content out there. Literally just hours of reading the wiki, with the occasional personal opinion and a mini essay on why it's objectively true (it just is, okay?!).
Yeah I don't know why the dude has so many views
It's the most dull shit possible most of the time. There is some good stuff in there occasionally, but most of the time it's the wiki.
>Yeah I don't know why the dude has so many views
Bots and or algorithm frickery. Most people don't know just how cheap botting is.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/jaymcgregor/2016/12/14/how-we-bought-reddit-for-200/
>nasally nerd voice
>gay lisp
>literally just explains his playthrough step by step as a review, becomes obvious he's bad at it and moronic but is supremely confident the game is wrong
>2 hour video about new entry to a franchise
>”I didn’t play the other ones..”
>close tab
To be fair, the amount of times I've argued on Ganker with someone only for them to drop a "I never played but I watched [homosexual]'s playthrough" like 5 posts in is distressingly frequent as well
>13 hour call of duty retrospective
>Skip to 4
>Calls the USMC Force Recon guys "US Army Rangers'
One fricking job.
>>It's not a bad game, it's just a bad [name of series] game
>listening to a video about a game
>the author just suddenly mentions gamergate despite the game being no where near that cringe.
At the end of the day, I just like obsessive weebs
Astroturf
I can't stand people who ironically dress bad.
Yeah, Tim Rogers is the best. People should really watch his video on Doom or something first though, his style is very different from everyone else so going in on a game that you have played before will make it less jarring
I rather enjoy his autobiographical tirades, especially in that Doom video.
They're the best part of his videos, and his Doom review is when they first showed up meaningfully. His videos keep doing it from that point on, and I thought it was done best in his CP2077 video when he was talking about crunch. His Bokunatsu review is basically at that level for the entire time though, it's my favorite video on Youtube now. The entire video is just a leadup to that section, really getting into it in the back half of part 4.
>CP2077 video
He just went and made a bunch of unlisted videos you had to click on a playlist in the first video's description to find, weird move but I guess it culled idiots from seeing them
I wonder what he's making next, I think he said something about Final Fantasy IV?
His next video is LA Noire, he said so in one of his videos. We don't know the order of the videos after that, but it's going to include FF4 and Earthbound.
He made the CP2077 video like that because Youtube wouldn't let him upload the full ~11 hour video for some reason and he didn't want half the videos on his channel to be the CP2077 review.
Any idea when any of this is happening?
Nope. I check in on his streams every so often and he hasn't said anything about it that I've seen. Based on how he made his old videos he makes them somewhat concurrently, so the new ones must be pretty substantial. For example, he was in Kansas doing the Bokunatsu review a month before the CP2077 review was released.
It does suck that it's taking this long though, we're on 15 months here when at one point he was making them in 2-3. I'm sure that making a video like the Bokunatsu one is ungodly difficult though, there is no way I could make something like that.
Yeah, from how he described it he works the same kinds of hours as the Rockstar code monkeys did making those games lol
Yeah. There is a good shot that this next video taking longer to come out is because he doesn't want to work 80+ hours a week making them anymore.
>CAN YOU BEAT [game] WITHOUT COLLECTING ANY [game's main collectible]???
>Gets to a point where it's impossible to continue
>"buuuuuuut we're gonna ignore that and keep going anyway"
necessitating regular uploads has been a disaster for youtube quality
for me it's how over-dramatic every single fricker is nowadays
>it's unsettling that [thing that is not fricking unsettling at all]
>the fact that [overly reaching point] happens is terrifying
the trend to over dramatize things by labelling them as creepy or scary makes me mad to no end.
I watched a guy review all the armored core games and he was so incredibly chill throughout all of it, I loved it. The guy treated it like if you were explaining the missions and story and gameplay and whatnot concisely to a friend instead of trying to hook the interest of an ADHD child
>Liminal Spaces
>video game essay
>"but to understand [game], we need to go back to where it all started"
>tells the entire fricking history of the company
Fricking hate this shit, useless padding
Daily reminder that this video essay trend is happening because clickbait on YT has gotten so bad, that YT now pays for watch time, no longer just for clicks. If YT were to change their ad revenue policy again, all these vapid essays would stop getting made immediately.
>It is bad that people get paid for making videos audiences actually want to watch instead of clickbaiting us
Don't even defend yourself please. Just move on from this moronic opinion.
>Reading Comprehension: 0
>Narrator is an ESL with a thick accent or speaks with a nasally voice
I'm sorry, the video might even be good, but I just can't stand this
so..are there any good youtube channels? I just want videos that are no more than 30 minutes that actually have something interesting to say and aren't just mindless background noise
Running Shire's Yiik review is 90 minutes of pure gold.
>no more than 30 minutes
Sorry, you're better off on tiktok
Never read a book before? If something is too long for you, break it up into sections. I never understand this complaint.
I liked this guys glitch videos, sadly he only made like 4 before getting cancelled. They're very concise and actually answer the questions asked at the beginning
>dude makes semi-decent analytical videos about Kingdom Hearts
>dude makes one for birth by sleep
>watch it
>video dude quotes an interview with Nomura making an off-hand comment about how Sora's soul was originally bonded with Ventus before birth, but they changed that to be just after his birth to better fit with western conceptions of soul and life before/after death
>"WOAH, I CAN'T BELIEVE WESTERNER CHUDS ARE SO SMALL MINDED AND BIGOTED THEY HAD TO CHANGE THEIR STORY. GUESS WE HAVE A LOT OF GROWING UP TO DO, HUH?!"
>immediately close the video, unsub and click "never recommend videos from this channel"
damn life is a lot easier when you don't force yourself to listen to talentless hacks on youtube for 8 hours a day
>click on video
>ESL with euro accent
>turn off video before they even finish the first sentence
I know it's fricked up but it's the truth. The only ones who get away with this are Swedes because they are so Americanised it's hard to even tell they're ESL most of the time
Same.
t. Euro
There's also one specific kind of American accent that sounds like the person speaking has multiple golf balls in their mouth, that I absolutely hate. Americans probably know which one I'm talking about.