Had an absolutely cancerous day. I've just cracked open a bottle of Arberlor 12 and got the radiohead playlist on. It's fricking Joever.
How you holding up?
Had an absolutely cancerous day. I've just cracked open a bottle of Arberlor 12 and got the radiohead playlist on. It's fricking Joever.
DUUUUUUUUUUDE AL GUL!!!!
Frick off Measure Head.
Try a different genre than the ones you're used to?
Ah shit man, no chance of patching things?
Good shit anon
Thank you Anon
eh. watching a stream of ff16. visiting my parents in a week, so juts waiting for that moment. Need something comfy to play, but dunno what
Pretty bad but I just remembered the hide function exists so I feel a lot better now.
bye.
me and my girl broke, i was a complete loser with an empty soul before her, i cant tell if i really want to go back yet or go back to being a loser that plays videogames 100 hours per week
Bro, everything that happened doesn't go with her. You learn and make mistakes, take what you got and leave behind what's too heavy to drag around. You'll get up and you'll keep walking.
Close to a month of no fap/porn, feel more energetic overall. I am holding up good I suppose.
your perceived boost in energy is a psychosomatic illusion you’re bringing upon yourself as a fake biological reward for your decision to drop porn, which is already coming from a predetermined conclusion that you came to without any evidence. please stop talking about nofap on Ganker, as it is cognitively harmful to the minds of young adults who have not yet reached a plateau of emotional security to be exposed to your religiously-sponsored pseudoscience
What? I am not even religious. I just didn't like how much time I wasted on it and the feeling of addiction
>It's all in your mind bro
yawn. Where else would it be? Spoken like a true novice in the arena of chastity.
Porn is literally harmful to your body. See below:
https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/ru/relevant-research-and-articles-about-the-studies/
nobody gives a frick what the mormons have to say about it lmao, they run the biggest grift on the planet after the vatican
doesn't the fact that we even have people linking mormon-written news articles about porn being bad prove my point, though?
>yourbrainonporn.com
The founder of this site Gary Wilson claims there's a relationship between porn use and lower erectile functioning, even though the study he cites states that lower erectile functioning predicted *problematic* porn use and not the reverse
Seems like it's misrepresenting research, no?
There is 0 conclusive evidence that porn is worse for you than any other vice. Guys who are compulsive masturbators have issues that are related to problems with impulse control or have no other way at to deal with their high sex-drives.
Nobody can cite a single personal advantage to removing porn from their lives entirely. No one who quit watching porn magically became a better person because of it. Unless you have a good reason to avoid it, blaming your problems on it is literally just avoiding personal agency for your lack of discipline.
also porn isn’t a vice
it has no negative effects and neither does masturbation, unless you’re playing your dick like a Guitar Hero controller 10x a day
t. porn addicts
Keep us posted.
>porn addicts
I don’t have an insatiable sex drive and the only time I end up jerking off in excess is when I am stressed the frick out and procrastinating. Most porn is very boring to me and only arouses me enough to get me off quickly. I usually use masturbation as a way to help relax if I’m having trouble sleeping. Since I don’t have a gf, porn is a pretty reliable tool for making sure I can get myself off and get on with my life.
Do what you want. But porn/coom culture and the way people rattle off their fetishes like a job history is moronic and disgusting.
maybe re-align your buck teeth and drain the hydrocephalic water from your head and you’ll stop being so stupid
It is what it is. Sexuality is a part of being a human being. Only shameless morons boast about their depravity to anyone other than the people they’re sharing those activities with.
You are on Ganker you fricking ape
>the way people rattle off their fetishes like a job history
are you basing this off /trash/ threads or what lol, i don't know a single person who is like this
Having fetishes, partializing the human body, stockpiling deviancies and favorite porn stars and studios is moronic and an aberration of sexuality.
Shamelessly indulging in your biological imperatives makes you an animal. Honestly, this kind of rhetoric always seems to come from people who lack the discernment - and/or the strength - to say No.
This.
It’s kinda sad to see anons who can’t tell the difference between reality and the shit on Ganker. They’re like sheltered children whose only concept of reality is based on the accounts of absolute degenerates.
this is just neopuritan 101
it’s “you doing it is wrong because it just is”. he knows it’s a completely shitpants statement but doesn’t care because he’s in it to jerk off his own grudge towards porn and try to ignite similar irrational feelings in you so he can make you insecure and feed off your discomfort
just tell him to kill himself as violently and unempathetically as you can. you can’t get these people to change, just bully them and completely overkill them with anger to scald them into shame
The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom, as they say. It's the penitent sinner who understands his sin, not the peddlers of that sin like you.
is this what playing disco elysium does to people? they start inventing shitty aphorisms to express their moronic ideas? who the frick is "they"??
>inventing shitty aphorisms
It's a Blake quote. Just stay in your lane and go draw more furry breasts.
being able to process flowery speech influenced by classic literature doesn’t make you intelligent
Actually, it does; that’s literally what intelligence is intended to be good for, anon. If you disagree with him then at least try to explain why.
It inherently counts as a vice because it is hedonistic. A vice and a sin are two different things, anon.
>sin
how’s that shit taste
>"man" defending depraved smut has no concept of sexual purity
I see.
anon, i’m gonna get real with you and stop trying to be funny for a second because i genuinely feel bad for you
let go of your religious upbringing and de-internalize your abuse
your personality is genetic and you have a natural set of likes and dislikes and things that make you happy, and every day you live with this imposed morality in your system is a day you will never get back
not jerking off about all this Christian sexual purity shit doesn’t mean you have to be a child molestor, just calm the frick down and let yourself indulge for once because you’re not going to develop the self-control you clearly lack if you keep living like this
You are not as smart as you think you are.
Stop cooming and you’ll get prostate cancer. Man evolved to rape and coom constantly and you’re spitting in the face of natural law.
>Man evolved to rape
pls rember that wen u feel scare or frigten
never forget ttimes wen u feeled happy
wen day is dark alway rember happy day
Was sober today, so just cleaned the house and wept for the piece of shit abusive monster I become when I drink and the Harry doldrums hit me. I hope you all make it.
First step of fixing your shit is admitting you have shit to fix anon.
Used to drink and smoke and watch the last dream with Dora in my cold, empty apartment at like 2 am constantly. I don't know why I'm telling you this. We're all gonna make it.
Shit man, it's good to vent. You're right man, we will all make it in our own way.
Bless all of you. I hope you find the love and belonging Harry never did (if you get the "bad" ending, jesus christ it's brutal: all his friends abandon him in disgust and he just fricks off to some shack to drink himself to death.)
How do I level up Volition irl?
By not being a slave to Electrochem, i.e. leveling up your self-respect
>shitsco shitlesium
An hero already
Glad corpos actually fricking mindbroke the hack fricks who wrote this shitty vn
Human connection is the most important thing one needs to be able to crawl out of the pit
It really is about Love. We need each other.
>completely drop online "friend" who goes out of their way to be shitty about absolutely everything I like but cries to the moon the second I act the same way
>social circle becomes significantly wider and I'm usually in a better mood
>workload doubled in a way that I can basically do frick all and not be expected to actually work hard
Even managed to find a beer I'm able to tolerate instead of just doing mixed spirits all of the time
Alcohol is extremely difficult to get off of, just knowing where you frick up is really useful
>femanon
Quit drinkin.
Men can have terrible social circles as well
Genuine connections are unfortunately extremely rare online and I hope that eventually there will be an improvement
People can do things without a religious reason, trying to throw someone attempting some sort of self improvement under the bus for something you created in your head just harms you
The prepwork isn't all that bad for a lot of dishes, and this is someone who usually just makes really simple meals
>problem friend they had difficulty leaving
>talking about a 'social circle'
>has more potential work to do, doesn't actually have to do it due to lack of responsibilities and expectations
>can't tolerate beer
Yeah, it's a femanon.
I normally drink significantly harder than the 5% in beer. I was born with a penis and I'm comfortable with it
Modern job hunting is absolute dogshit and goes out of it's way to make it terrible for the average person
>attempting some sort of self improvement
stopped reading there
nofap is not self-improvement, and it should be obvious to anyone without ASD that gaslighting young men with that rhetoric is extremely psychologically hazardous and can lead to very real problems that work against self-improvement
you’re just furthering a psychological control mechanism perpetuated by puritanical zealots, and obviously even if masturbation was capable of having a negative effect on you, banning yourself from fapping wouldn’t nearly be as helpful as just learning basic self-control
pussy
>anyone mentions they want to jerk off less
>porn shills come out of the woodwork
You're way too upset about someone not wanting to consume porn for it to be healthy on your end
nahhhh
you’re a piece of shit for finding any kind of moral or emotional valor in poisoning socially awkward nerds with fratboy anti-porn propaganda
you’re not gonna make me insecure or feel guilty about my own actions - i fully acknowledge that everyone has a sexual appetite that can be overfed with pleasure, but what you’re doing is calling someone a food addict because they’re concerned that they’re overeating and saying that food is unhealthy for you
suck my fat porn artist nuts, and i hope you learn your fricking lesson about bringing this ass-backward garbage onto my anime sex website
>suck my fat porn artist nuts
There it is.
>ohhhh bro i named the israelite hehrhehe guess i win another debate
hang the rope
I don't care about the culture war. You might as well by a Tyson shareholder trying to dunk on vegans. I see through you.
Stop being so upset that some random internet person doesn't want to jerk off
Man you are so filled with hate. Why?
because i've lived through internet culture long enough to see everything good about it not only tactically stripped from our current living condition but see it tactically stripped from the minds of the stragglers who made it out of the internet's death in one piece
you newbies wanna talk for 14,000 shitty threads about reddit and posers and troony discord psyops and then when i call out how your supposed brothers are being mentally abused with psychologically degenerative anti-masturbation rhetoric you wanna be a little pink pansy and whine about me being full of hate?
this shit is EXACTLY what is raping board culture. anons who have the entire toolkit and years and years of experience online under their belt having their worldview and emotions fricked into the dirt and suffering a complete breakdown of character because of these frickers getting into their brains and you sit there and say nothing about it.
fricking shameful. don't cry to me when you wanna have a nice day because everything you care about on this site is dead and you realize all too late that this place was the last vestige of hope in this fricking world and you let it be murdered
If you want a decent imageboard experience, you should have left Ganker after 2016
you're probably right
pre-2016 Ganker was so much more relaxing and fun than now. even 2014 was so much better
leave and never return
You either have nostalgia goggles or are a paedophile
>everyone is newbies
People are just offering advice to each other.
lol and what the frick are you gonna do about anything other than squeal and tug your stinky little wiener all day? no dignity, no spine. you've reduced your existence to a shrieking b***h of a woman, it's pathetic.
if only you put this much effort into getting a girlfriend
sad life but hey you're used to your hand by now
>the REAL chastity is moderation
It isn't. We all watched that episode of South Park, dude.
WHERE
THE
FRICK
IS
STU?
Get rid of that troonyElysium pic.
doing ok. cant wait to see my bf
homosexual
Recovering after an 18 hour work day yesterday. Used the extra money earned to buy kitchenware that I'm breaking in by making lasagna for the first time. I will now never make lasagna again because jesus christ the work is not worth the food.
>video games?
eh just alright. Gonna start a part time job that'll last two months in a store I already worked in. Manager likes me so he calls me when he needs people. Hope it becomes a full time job but I might be too optimistic. Job searching is soul crushing
Looking for a job has all the downsides of a bad job without the positive reinforcement of a paycheck at the end of the week.
Went to my in-laws. Ate good food. Came back. Played Battlebit. Got annoyed, quit. Played MechWarrior 3 instead, had fun. Got a blowjob. Did some facefricking for the first time. Very satisfying. Watched Beef for a couple episodes with woman. Mediocre. Currently shitposting while woman is attempting to make her Windows 10 installation look like '98. Bored.
Good day though.
I dreamt my friend came back from ignoring me for some months now
I check his steam profile every so often
Encyclopedia [Medium: Success] - It's a collection of games you wouldn't play on your own.
I got issues man. I'm a nice guy but when somebody pushes the wrong button I can get really nasty. It's not a good thing, I'm mentally ill and deeply insecure and I've built up this defense protocol which activates when I feel attacked or threatened. I'm not really impressive or imposing looking, I look like a man but that's about it, but when that mode activates I seem like I could be capable of anything. People actually get scared of me sometimes, and I like it. It makes me feel good, I feel this rush.
I fell for the compsci programmer meme. didn't learn a thing my first semester and I don't care enough to practice in my downtime. I'll just wait it out and get some cushy IT job. just two more years.
Feeling alright, stuck in limbo waiting to hear back from my job applications, drank a few ciders Thatchers Orange. If i'm feeling cute tommorow, I might get shitfaced on whiskey.
Ayy nice man, what whisky?
Hope the job apps go well.
Thanks man, Glenmorangie 10year is my go to.
Good taste my man
see pic related
bros i....... i think i'm gonna have to sleep on my chair or something
the smell is slowly creeping up my shirt jesus christ have mercy on my soul
Take a shower and open up your windows moron
i don't want to stand up anon
this shit literally will run down my pants onto the carpet if i do
Then get vinegar, some dish soap, mix it with water then have it sit on the shit for 10 minutes and then wipe it up. I truly understand depression can cause bullshit like this, but you need to take a fricking shower
>sleep on my chair
did you shit yourself in your fricking bed? go shower, wash any soiled material, open a window and vow to never do anything this pathetic to yourself again
i had a 12 pack of mountain dew so i guess that' where this whole ordeal started at
if i waddle into the shower i'm gonna spread shit everywhere frick
>if i waddle into the shower i'm gonna spread shit everywhere frick
better than stewing in it
get off the damn computer
I've recently been shifted to a new job involving safeguarding vulnerable adults. I can't talk about any details to anyone, but suffice it to say the psychic damage is adding up.
Christ.
Self-neglect is a kind of abusive behaviour anon.
update
i rushed to the bathroom with shit dripping onto the floor
took a sniff off of my chair and almost threw up
clean undies now but i'm gonna throw the chair out the window into the neighbors yard
Dont fricking throw it into their yard, anyone will be able to tell it was you and then you'd have to sit and explain what you did
nah they won't their backyard is full of garbage they won't bother
there is the slight problem of shit stains on the carpet though
I already told you how to fix that part
just dispose of the chair when garbage collection rolls around, throwing your shitchair into the neighbor's yard is a surefire way to get landed in deeper shit
Fricking what? Do you want to get your windows smashed in by a brick or your car(if you even have one) keyed?
dont do that, cops will dna test the poo puddles
GO TO THE BATHROOM! YOU'RE SHITTING YOURSELF!!
How do you stomach more than one thatchers blood orange that stuff is so sickly. I can barely tolerate thatchers haze. I want to try that thatchers vintage stuff one day though
>stuck in limbo waiting to hear back from my job applications,
i fricking hate this.
>19
>useless
>worthless
>lonely
>without energy
>only games bring joy in life
I already know that as soon as I finish school and move out of my parents I will go hikikomori and start smoking cigs to shorten my life span, at least I will be able to enjoy some games while rotting away,
>my only hope is a female soulmate that I would live for and I have none as for now so
>and start smoking cigs to shorten my life span
if that's your goal just do drugs
I just feel like smoking cigs has more soul than doing drugs, I would also add getting drunk every now and then to the list just to feel the peaceful melancholy
I'm not good with words. But 19 is too young to feel like that, even though I was the exact same way at your age. It didn't help that I kept getting my life shaken up and couldn't settle and keep a friend group. But one thing I'll say is that, if you don't push yourself way outside your comfort zone socially and in other ways, many aspects of yourself will remain unchanged for years. Like, you'd be surprised and horrified. Yea, I've changed and grown maybe a little bit, but in so many ways I've stayed the same. Here I am 10 years later, 29, and the shame you get from those aspects of yourself at 19 is nothing compared to this. Painful hollowness. I'm pretty sure I'm going to chop sueycide. Another thing I wish I had done was get diagnosed, I'm pretty sure I have at least adhd and ocd, if not also autismo. I know you can make things better
I haven't fully given up yet, I still have fraction of hope that is killing me from the inside, I am not unable to make social conversations or meet new people I just don't feel the need or desire to, even with my current friends it feels like obligation rather than my own wish, personally I prefer solitude over socializing I probably should get diagonsed but it wouldn't change much as I wouldn't take meds anyway because I am
>LE BASED'O
>even with my current friends
you are a normalgay trying to feel special
Oh yes I forgot
>have friends = normalgay
I love you Black person
yes that makes you a normalgay
>waaa but i don't WANT to make an effort bawwww
Black person. i don't have that choice
fix your life before it's too late. soon you'll be 29 or 32 feeling the same thing.
>schizo derails the thread with /misc/ shitposting
Many such cases
Im fine, graduated with a useless degree and looking to get into a semi-comfy office job and live comfortably alone until I either lose my mind or a gril falls into my lap
Traditional games feel more fun than vidya nowadays for me, I just wish I had a more consistent group to play with
In the same position Anon. Started working out recently. Gotta make sure if she falls in my lap she won't want to get out.
i just shat myself and instead of showering i sat on my ass full of liquid steaming shit for 8+h for grind diablo4
i am scared of standing up
you're better than this, man
you can do better for yourself
Get better taste in video games bro
I was hoping for some happening in Moscow but orc back down at the last second and now I am bummed out that I won't see the morons killing each other.
i'm about to graduate college and i've never been more anxious about my future
but i'm okay i suppose
Hope you feel better bro, whatevers going on, I'm sure it is some temporary bullshit. Hang in there!
I'm at a house party with six, count em, SIX cats. Living the dream
>I'm at a house party
>posts on Ganker
Not that great of a party eh? Also four cats would be the end of me, having allergies and that
>mfw started Disco Elysium last night
Got any suggestions for a starter build, anons? What little I’ve read online seems to say that Inland Empire is the best skill to make your signature, but I’ve been thinking about putting it into Electrochemistry since that’d be closer to what I’m like IRL. For a 4/4/2/2 build what would the wise anons of Ganker think to be best?
HAS ANYONE ITT PLAYED THIS FRICKING GAME??
PLS RESPOND
It depends on what you want. I went for the Empathic archetype, forgot the name. You can mix and match but I think the preset builds offer the most focused playstyles depending on what you want. I wanted the sad, poignant shit so I went for a Feeler. If you want the lore autism go for Thinker.
I went thinker and tried to play a serious cop and had a good time
I think you're overthinking it a bit. "What stat is the best signature" is kinda the wrong way to look at it. If you want to make a custom build based on what stats you think are interesting or relatable, that's fine. Picking any of the 3 base builds is good, too. 4 is fine but I like having one category at 5, I prefer having some stats that I'm very proficient at rather than being more well rounded. But even that's kinda overthinking it. I wouldn't really strategize with disco elysium, just pick something and relax, slow down, and let the experience wash over you
Being too well-rounded is something I’d like, but I know that’s a double-edged sword in games like this. Is going with 3/3/3/3 just a bad idea in general for a first play through? Seems like the game is heavily geared towards being proficient at one of the 3 main traits with “Motorics” being support.
>Is going with 3/3/3/3 just a bad idea in general for a first play through?
Yea I wouldn't. Passing and failing checks in this game isn't all that serious or dire. It sounds corny but failure is a natural part of the game, so it's fine to be good at some things and suck at others. Failing passive checks that happen mid-conversation is just one of the things that kinda breathes life into the game and adds to it. Your failures are often as interesting as your successes, and usually funnier. So don't save scum either
Alright, fair enough. I gonna see if I can do an emotional/physical build. That sounds like it oughtta lead to some good times. I’ll concern myself with the lore later.
just b urself
What funny voices do you want to hear from the most?
Level the skills associated with them.
Or just attempt to make what you imagine your real life stat spread is, that's always fun too.
I keep thinking about how incapable I am at making friends and how meaningless my day to day life is and I don't know how to get out of this negative headspace
I honestly can’t even begin to imagine what it’s like not to have friends. I’m sorry, anon. I hope you can figure it out because tbh I haven’t made any new friends since the end of high school and frankly I couldn’t give a frick either way.
Finally moving out of my parent's house. It feels good to be free but I'm afraid of failing.
Made fried chicken sandwiches now im drinking ice cold water. Life is good.
Alright.
I really miss S, but she's likely going through a lot right now.
I'll be ready to help her when she needs it.
>did an abstinence run as my first playthrough
did I frick up?
>all these sad people on a saturday
Being sad here is a requirement
I just learned that my uncle died from a heart attack a few days ago. I feel like shit and don’t even have the drive to play video games.
Disco Elysium was really enjoyable, I dislike my current trajectory, How did anons complete the Church mission?
Been going to AA for three weeks now. Still lying about taking antabuse so I can drink in secret.
Could stay sober for 2 weeks but realized my life hadn't gotten better at all and there was no reason for me to stay sober.
Why did you go in the first place if you didn’t have anything you hoped to achieve with sobriety?
My family saw the state I was in so I went for their sake, thinking things might improve. I did have a desire to quit for the first couple of days even though withdrawal was nasty, but that desire to quit faded away rather quickly.
I still get fricked up on occasion (with nothing but regret to show for it) but I quit drinking entirely for about a year during the lockdown after I discovered that I was at risk of making everyone I care about hate me due to the way I become when I drink in excess. As long as I have access to adderall I have literally 0 desire to drink, but without it I have a tendency to think drinking wouldn’t be such a bad idea (even though it almost always is).
The cognitive dissonance associated with alcohol consumption that I experience is so dumb. The drug is fricking worthless and serves no purpose aside from making my life worse, and yet I am compelled to consume it when I think I can get away with it.
That's called an addiction. You either conquer it or it conquers you. There's no bargaining.
It's tough. Some have the willpower to quit, but if you had willpower you wouldn't be addicted to begin with.
I just don't know what to do, honestly. I always told myself that once I got a girl I loved I'd stop drinking. Next thing I know that girl leaves me because of my drinking. And the one after that. And the one after that. And so on.
Now I'm just laying in my bed, rotting away. I'm just so tired of a life of mediocrity and knowing the fact that I'll never accomplish anything of worth.
>I always told myself that once I got a girl I loved I'd stop drinking. Next thing I know that girl leaves me because of my drinking. And the one after that. And the one after that. And so on.
Chronic booze consumption and successful relationships definitely don’t mix under most normal conditions, and most relationships end up becoming stressors eventually no matter what. For people like you and me, anon, finding a substitute for booze that won’t make people run for the hills seems to be the best option. Total sobriety is out of the question unless you can manage to find something that doesn’t get you high to fill the void and keep you mentally on track. For me, there is no such thing except low doses of amps. A girlfriend would be nice, but I don’t think she’ll be enough to rid me of this curse.
To add on to
, my psychiatry clinic has suggested using Wellbutrin as a way to get my shit together. It’s a drug that I’ve had success with in the past, but it takes a long time to start working and requires total abstinence for the effects to be fully noticeable. Since it seems to cancel out the effectiveness of adderall I haven’t been using it as consistently as I’d like, but I’m quite certain that avoiding all drugs and sticking to the Wellbutrin for a month will most likely put me where I need to be in order to function normally without the desire to escape reality via recreational drugs. I plan on attempting to engage in this hellish journey soon since I’ve got basically nothing going on these days. Hopefully it works out and I start focusing on doing hard mental work without feeling like I can’t succeed while sober.
not great.
Doing well for the most part. Had a girlfriend for a while now. Working on art stuff. Still not very good at making friends irl but trying to get better. I just don't know how to properly interface with most people. Even my girlfriend has acknowledged that I suck at it. I don't want to talk about perfunctory nothings, I want to talk about cool interesting things. Even if that means the other person telling me all about something they're passionate about and I know nothing about, isn't that better than just talking bland inanities all day? I don't understand it. I made some friends this year in college but they both moved away since they graduated. I make a point of not deriving all of my happiness from one place or person but I can't deny that if I didn't have my gf I'd probably be pretty depressed about the whole thing. The internet is just getting worse and worse and I don't know where I can talk to people about the things I like anymore.
I'm waiting for Sifu to go on sale since someone said it was like God Hand and I love that game. Might restart my The Void playthrough until then since I botched my first one real bad, as is known to happen in that game.
I just want all this to be over
Go and walk to the first Café you see tomorrow anon.
Just wander around for a bit until you find one, maybe with outdoor seating if the weather's nice where you are.
Buy yourself a hot chocolate. Maybe say frick it and get cream and marshmallows too.
Just sit there and listen to people talk, traffic and the world going by.
You've come this far and it's not easy, everyone knows that. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't be proud you have.
If anon is american he probably doesn't have a cafe, or anything else, within walking distance
I just dont want to work a dead-end job anymore. I want to be able to move out, have a career, and meet a girl before I hit 30. Im about to go back to school because I cant get hired with my current degree - and its in STEM.
Thank you anon
I had plans of doing the same by the time I hit 30, but being an undisciplined wretch kinda threw a wrench in the whole thing. Dropped out of pharmacy school at 28 to start studying computer science, discovered it’s a lot harder than medicine, and am now about to turn 32 with a year of classes left. New goal is to be a functional, eligible bachelor by 35 at the latest.
I regret nothing, tbh. Everything I did made sense at the time and has taught me a lot. I’m just glad I didn’t collapse under the weight of the failures.
>Dropped out of pharmacy school at 28 to start studying computer science, discovered it’s a lot harder than medicine,
Hah; my CS program was piss poor. They had me learning HTML in Notepad for a year and a half doing piss all. Same professor taught OOP and just assumed you already knew how to do everything in what was an Introductory course. Thankfully he retired and the rest of the department was decent, but man was it infuriating.
>Everything I did made sense at the time and has taught me a lot.
Despite my misery this is how I go about my life. I learn a new lesson every day, and every choice I made was either out of my control at the time or seemed like the best option.
>Are you applying for new jobs at the moment?
I've sent out at least 5 to 10 applications nearly every week for the past two years. My company doesnt want me to leave our warehouse despite my degree so I completely gave up on it. Im in talks for an internship somewhere nearby, so Im hoping that goes through. A lot of recruiters just ghost me out of nowhere it feels like, and I always make sure to follow up with them.
>Hah; my CS program was piss poor.
Mine was pretty good up until we got past the basics. The professors for the ‘introduction to data structures and algorithms’ course did frickall and basically had us using pic related to teach ourselves. This is fine and all, except zyBooks is filled to the brim with so much fricking information that it quickly becomes overwhelmingly difficult to have any idea how much of it is relevant or useful (which was not unlike pharmacy school, as it turns out). I had to repeat the class several times until I felt like I was actually learning anything, and even then I couldn’t have succeeded at our final project without help from ChatGPT.
I’ve decided not to worry so much about absorbing all the information and just try to plow my way through this degree ASAP. Trying to understand every detail behind the abstraction of efficient code isn’t something I imagine I’m gonna learn anytime soon.
Are you applying for new jobs at the moment?
I hated the feeling of being trapped in a job that's just gonna go nowhere too Anon, so I just had to put together some kind of plan to get myself the frick out of it.
It wasn't easy, my (ex) girlfriend even mocked me for it because she didn't think I was being serious at the time, but I did it in the end. It only really bought me time, because I'm essentially back at square one now, but at least I know I can do it again.
I can't say much for meeting a girl, I'm not amazing at talking to strangers but it's definitely a skill you can improve with effort - just means you've gotta roll with the failures. I know I'm a huge hypocrite for that, but good things always take time.