I need some ideas for wacky potions for my ominous potion seller NPC.

I need some ideas for wacky potions for my ominous potion seller NPC.
The plan is that when he leaves in a hurry, he leaves a small suitcase of flasks behind that the PCs can either return to him to get one powerful potion as a reward, or open it to gain three random unidentified potions.

So far my ideas are
>potion that makes you spit fire for thirty seconds
>potion that transforms you into a rabid werewolf for five minutes
>potion that kills you instantly, but you wake up a day later with your wounds healed
>potion that makes plants grow super fast when poured on them
>poison
>potion that lets you transform into any person for an hour (you need to add a drop of their blood)
>booze
>health potion
>potion that heightens your awareness but reduces your reaction time for an hour
>potion that gives you magic vision for an hour, allowing you to analyze magic structures
>potion that makes you levitate but halves your movement speed for an hour

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  1. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Potion that grants the character non-concentration vampiric touch until next sunrise, but they count as undead (so can't be healed by most spells)

  2. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Potion that gives a full head of luscious hair. It falls out after a week
    Potions that each enhance a different sense but to the point where it's very easy to be overstimulated
    Potion that cures hangovers
    Potion of laxatives
    Potion of sleeplessness

  3. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    "Counterspell" potion: undoes any other effects of other potions.

    "Not-a-potion": all wisdom checks, and even magical identification id it as water, a critical fail identifies it as Immortality or some such bs

    Dragon Dildo lube: what it says on the tin.

    Genies Bottle: a small genie lives in this bottle. He doesn't grant wishes, he just lives there.

    Mountain Dew: it's just dew collected from a mountain.

    Pill bottle: a bottomless bag of holding that only holds sugar pills; "Maximize that Placebo"

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Dragon Dildo lube
      I think it should be more general, especially in a world that conceivably has more dragon dicks than dildos

      • 7 months ago
        Anonymous

        I think you underestimate the historical availability of dildos

        • 7 months ago
          Anonymous

          I know they had dildos but I meant dragon dildos specifically

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Dragon Dildo lube allows the user to fit objects of any size or shape in any orifice without discomfort or injury
      >popular off-label use as a cheaper, somewhat temporary bag of holding

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Genies Bottle: a small genie lives in this bottle. He doesn't grant wishes, he just lives there.
      kek

  4. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Dragonkiller - it would kill a dragon, but also a man should he happen to drink it

  5. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    >potion that turns you into a pickle for 24 hours
    >causes unstoppable laughter while any look upon you

  6. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    potion that grants xray vision, only works in the dark, it does not enhance night vision

  7. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    > potion of remembrance: potion with a stored memory of the creator, (make it funny, dark, evil, or embarrassing.)
    > potion of invisibility (flawed): the users skin becomes invisible, but the muscle, bones and other internal organs DO NOT. also because their eyelids become invisible, sleep is very difficult. (for researchers studying the mortal body)
    > potion of crab strength: sets Strength to 2 for 1 hour. (practicing for other creatures)
    > potion of air breating. (aquatic experiments)
    > Oil of sharpness in a potion bottle: poisons the target for the duration, but give them a +3 to perception for 1 hr. (CHAOS)
    >potion of insect friendship: insects are attracted to you for 1 hr.(always that one player that doesn't like bugs)
    >potion of growth (flawed): gives you reduce instead

    just simple potions that can be annoying, yet doesn't overtly harm the party, the occasional emotional scarring builds character though.

  8. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Faulty potion of thorns, it makes healing magic apply to the caster too.
    >Totipotent potion, once primed it acquires the properties of a random potion nearby.
    >A withering potion that only withers flowering plants.

  9. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    >potion of fleshweave

    The player partially melts into another player, or an npc if it makes more sense given the situation. They become like siamese twins for a day or two.

    >elixir of the great stink

    Drops effective charisma or whatever the social stat is to the lowest possible. Makes neutral NPC's avoid the character like a plague and enemies that close in have a tremendous urge to vomit. Lasts for an hour.

    >spoiled potion of luck

    Chance to crit or get a critical miss triples for 10 minutes.

  10. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    A potion that slowly degrades the molecular structure of the consumer, gradually turning them into a gelatinous blob/slime creature.

  11. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Potion of (Subjective) Beauty: magically sculpts the drinker's face to look like a Bogdanof

    Potion of Thirst: Drinking this potion makes you thristy (it's just nonmagical saltwater)

    Oil of Tactile Explosions: Coating a weapon with this oil causes it to generate a small explosion (Fireball spell if DnD) when it hits. Good for arrows, risky for melee weapons

  12. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    potion of logorrhea
    >for the duration you are unable to shut up about every thought that crosses your mind long enough to last past the sentence you're already saying
    potion of haste (discount version)
    >for an hour you feel like you have to do everything as fast as possible, from eating to lovemaking
    potion of parkour
    >bestows incredible climbing skills and the compulsion to use them until you reach the top of a "challenging" building (or similar structure, manmad or otherwise). both effects then end.
    potion of gonorrhea
    >cures any STD
    potion of memory
    >makes you remember things perfectly and vividly for one hour, can be dangerous for characters with amnesia
    potion of slaying
    >makes your outfit sharp as frick no matter what you're wearing
    potion of attraction
    >makes you magnetic

  13. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    It makes you immune to fire, then sets you on fire for 12 hours.
    You start seeing in the ultraviolet and infrared spectrums. You will miss seeing all these new colors for the rest of your life.
    Instant full heal, no questions asked. Come on, some of the potions have to be useful.
    It's just a really, really, really strong energy drink that makes you tweak out for the next three hours.

  14. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Potion that turns a person into a scorpion man.

  15. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    a potion that makes you want to buy more potions

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      So saltwater, got it.

  16. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Poison of Growth
    >if your character drinks it, roll a d20
    >the result times 5 determines how much % of your max HP your characters loses
    >if he survives, he gains a hefty chunk of exp (or the setting-equivalent of exp)

  17. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Potion that turns you into a woman. People always love that one

  18. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    a potion that makes you emit spores from your body that will transform things and living beings around you.
    What they transform into is random or depends on their stats, fears and other things like that

  19. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    flask with potion of transformation - transforms the drinker into a 1 use potion of transformation flask

  20. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    paired potions A and B. when drunk by different people, it swaps their positions (regardless of distance). doesn't have to be drunk concurrently, the teleport happens when the 2nd person drinks (no limit to this delay either). if the same guy drinks both he's torn apart by a spacial anomaly and vanishes.

    potion blocks your mind's perception of yourself i.e. you cant see your body nor see it in any reflective surfaces, cameras, photos etc, you're invisible to yourself, and can see things blocked by your own body. other people can see you and images of you just fine.

    a weaker potion: must be drunk specifically by knights, it empowers them to not die in battle

  21. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    potion that makes you levitate- unfortunately you just keep getting higher and higher

  22. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    potion of euphoria
    >causes a state of euhoria and dishinibition, but the following day one wakes with a headache and feeling bad
    potion of cleaning
    >similar to the potion of euphoria, it disinfects wounds and surfaces and prevents various health debuffs, but it stings
    potion of silence
    >used on metal parts makes them run smoothly and without sounds
    potion of nourishment
    >a white liquid extracted from various female animals, rich in fats and proteins can hydrate and nourish
    potion of purging
    >cause one to have potent bowel movements some time after ingesting it

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      There really are a lot of uses for semen, eh?

      • 7 months ago
        Anonymous

        that's the potion of pregnancy

  23. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    I hope you're going to post a compilation PDF of all the stuff that people have contributed itt, OP.

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      Can't you just, you know, read the thread?

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      Sure, why not. Currently only have some shitty phone since my PC died on me, and I hate doing this stuff on phine, but doing a PDF should be fine.

  24. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Have a Rifts potion list.

  25. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    potion of color
    the drinker becomes the color of the potion, inside and out, for a week. Tastes terrible, but not actually poisonous.
    Nonliving, nonmagical. materials are dyed permanently, instead, permeating deeply, even into metal and stone, without affecting any other attribute of the material.

  26. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    >potion of priapism

    Gives you solid chub and sexual stamina for two shots on goal, If you are fricking for love.
    A man prostitute will get priapism after his shots, Then a purple dick and impotence for 3 days after which all symptoms clear

  27. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    a crummy pail of water

  28. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    >potion of potion
    >Contains liquid glass. When poured onto a surface, reforms into a glass bottle. If any part of this bottle is cut off, both halves reform into two smaller bottles, ad infinitum.

  29. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    One last bump, but I think that's it pretty much.

    I'll make a pdf later on when the thread is dead and post it in another thread one of those days.

  30. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    Potion that makes you a cuck.

    • 7 months ago
      Anonymous

      OP stop, you've had enough!

  31. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    potion that forces you to take an even number of steps when moving (basically can only move by even units of movements)

  32. 7 months ago
    Anonymous

    >A potion that turns one of your limbs into a dog-sized leech. You can control how it moves but not what it eats, if something goes into its mouth.
    >A potion that transforms your eye into an invisible star-like prosthetic. Returns to normal upon looking at a moonless night sky.
    >A potion that explodes upon contact with oxygen. If shaken first, explosion will be unable to harm living bodies.
    >A potion that turns leather its poured onto into green-tinted articles of pristine clothing. Very dangerous if applied to a sunburn.

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