ITT: lolrandom players and your interactions with them
>Be me
>Set up Barb/Fighter for campaign
>Other players roll a rogue and another fighter (we weren't allowed to know what the other players were until it was time to start)
>DM is running a tournament which has groups of 3 go up against various monsters, our characters get "randomly" partnered together, thus introducing us to each other
>My character wants to know what the other's abilities are so we can communicate with each other and utilize strengths and come up with strategies
>Other characters are both like: "lol no, I don't know you"
>Try to rationalize saying we have a better chance of survival and victory if we know what we are all capable of, I share my abilities as a barb/fighter
>"lol, you're weird, that's weird. Why are you oversharing? We didn't ask"
>I ask if the characters have any interest in winning?
>"Nah bruh"
>I ask why are they here
>"IDK lulz"
>My character resigns their fate and expects to die
>Fight ends in victory with my character losing most of the HP
>Other characters fought just as well without losing any HP but only because of bad rolls from the DM
>MFW
Tell me about your frustrations with lolrandom players so I don't feel alone, please.
A party member always plays the same charter
>Dumbass who always spills when there is a social conversation
>Our party met a group of travelers who were worried about a hill giant who decided to go hunting in the area.
>I ask the travelers how much it would it would be worth to them if we dealt with the giant (My charter could speak to giants).
>The travelers offer some silver coin and a amulet
>when the party is in the middle of talking terms the bumbling snake sorcerer casts suggestion on the leader of the travelers, in full view of the other travelers
>leader beats dc and then asks us to leave
next quest the snake sorcerer finds and puts on a ring of mundanity (cursed ring that makes you look like a average commoner)
For this quest the party had to get a wand of polymorph from a wizard who turned his old master into a sheep.
>This time the party decides to be diplomatic and sneaky to get into a wizard tower to steal a wand.
>We decided we could get a private audience with the wizard if we blackmail him with threats of revealing his secret that he polymorphed his master.
>We get barred in the entry way by the guards with the wizard questioning us on top of his tower.
>all going to plan
>because of the sorcerer having high charisma he decides to speak for us
>The only thing he does is ask to be let in, for no reason
>He does this throughout the entire conversation
>Cut to me -1 charisma orc having to do the diplomacy for the party
>Wizard seeing the sheep says he is willing to do a trade
>Sorcerer asks for lots of money
>Constantly interrupts the dm to ask for money or to be let in
And this was just all in a side campaign for the new player
RIP
I can give a pass to players relying more on rolls than actually being charismatic, but he already knew the fricking plan. Recite that to the DM and roll.
>join 5e game hosted by friends I usually don't game with solely because I want to hang out with them
>they ignore any quest hooks given to them and hyperfocus on a guard's statement that zombie scalps are a schilling reward apiece
>we do nothing but hunt zombies out in the haunted woods for 4 hours
>every time a hook comes across us they want to fight it, rob it, or frick it
>get back to town
>turn in a moronic amount of zombie scalps and sell the belongings of murderhobo'd travelers
>alright so what can we buy? they ask the gm, and he tells them whatever from the phb
>we buy a few basic healing potions since there's nothing else to buy in 5e when you don't have a character that wants full plate
>Everyone is lol so randumb and the DM show's heavy favoritism towards such actions
>Constantly punishes players for thinking smart and who actually try to RP instead of making stupid jokes
>Leave figuring that he just wants lol so randumb morons at the table
>Find out later he rage quit mid game and never came back because people were being too lol so randumb
>Come back 5 years later with a new DM but was a part of the same old group
>It's once again repeating from point 1
I don't get what the frick was this guys problem
I'm DMing for some of my 4th grade class. They're all LOL RANDOM but they're kids and I've decided to just embrace that energy, as long as they're having fun and whacking bad guys it's fine with me
>I'm DMing for some of my 4th grade class
I shudder at the prospect of trying to get my 4th grade self to sit down and shut up long enough to play D&D. Then again, I assume nobody's making your non ADHD kids take Adderall..
I started playing D&D in second grade... And while we definitely did have a lot of "Lolrandumb" bullshit back then, we also managed to sit our asses down and just calmly play some AD&D and FuZion RPG
try throwing less complicated hooks at them. they dont care about lord whothefrickever's missing document case containing the result of triad regional crime statistic studies.
they might care about the location of a handsome rogue who's been pillaging the countryside. play into it with a lot of overdramatic characters talking about their dresses and pantaloons being stolen. play to your audience.
While I agree your table is full of homosexuals, and from a narrative standpoint your character really has no motive to stick with them after winning, isn't the point of the barbarian to tank the damage? You probably got the best outcome from the whole trainwreck.
For how things went down, yes it was probably the best outcome. But it could have gone a lot better had I known that the rogue is a reborn who can talk to ghosts (which could give us insight into what monsters to expect), and the other fighter is some kind of eldritch abomination with levels in sorcerer (who didn't take advantage of their own skills, preferring to punch things to death)
I had this guy who was playing an edgy Ronin-type character
>Talks about how honorable he is moments before tripping a guy who lost his leg aiding him in battle against assassins hired to kill him
>Talks about how he doesn't take enjoyment in taking lives the same session he tortured a captured enemy for his own amusement
>Talks about how money isn't everything moments before criticizing the party for accepting a task from a group that didn't have much to offer, but worked towards working the slaves in a city the campaign was centered around
>Said stuff like "I don't know what we're doing here" and "I never wanted to come here" during a story arc involving the party traveling to his character's homeland and liberating it from bandit rule, something he wanted to do for months
I don't think he was as much a lol random guy, but rather he was very stupid and kept saying things he thought sounded cool at the moment without much thought for his character's consistency
The other players noticed his behavior too and nicknamed him The Schizo Ronin, which was funny
I think shizo ronin would be a cool character concept if the person was more self aware and leaned more into it, only to say something that truly mattered to him and nobody taking it seriously having to prove it through action instead.
>Said stuff like "I don't know what we're doing here" and "I never wanted to come here" during a story arc involving the party traveling to his character's homeland and liberating it from bandit rule, something he wanted to do for months
Isn't lolrandom but that reminded me of a player who had a cursed sword and at one point during the campaign we were transported to another plane with an entire small arc that led up to a big boss fight with a being directly connected to his whole thing, wanting to take the sword. And when I realized I'd get the killing blow I did my best to set it up for the player during my turn instead and as everyone went quiet waiting for him to finish the boss... he suddenly says that his character goes and checks on something, because he paid so little attention that he thought the fight was already over, completely deflating the entire moment (and it wouldn't be the last time).
At that point you guys should have beat him up.
I'll post an idea I have yet to try but posted before: make a clown NPC play practical jokes about rape in the most random fashion possible.
>My character is WHACKY!
>I do WHACKY things
>I want to smash the guy over the head with a vase!
>"Okay, that would probably destroy the vase and make him hostile. You smash him with the vase?"
>Oh, no, I need that vase. I guess I'll treaty with him and reach an equitable resolution.
>???
Why is this a thing?
>Only ever normally play OSR, slow-paced play-by-post games over Email or forum, or Solo games by myself
>See an ad for a local D&D group. Decide to stop being a fuddy-duddy hermit and go join them
>It's 5e. I played back when 5e came out, but didn't really enjoy it
>roll up a basic Dwarven Fighter. Mercenary past backstory. Make him as straightforward as possible and easy for the DM to slip into the game
>Game starts, the players are fiddling with a boat on a beach
>They keep awkwardly RPing about stupid things they are doing in the boat, and keep trying to outdo each other with dumb quirky things like, "I stand in the boat and move the oars... Does it move in the sand?"
>They have their characters smack each other like it's an anime, and they do this autistic thing where they turn their head towards the person their talking to, yet glance around at everyone to see if they're laughing at how funny they are
>This goes on for a very long time
>I ask, "So, where do I enter the scene?"
>DM says, "You'll be here in a second, you're walking from the next town over."
>When they finally do decide to do anything serious with the boat, the DM makes them roll for every tiny interaction.
>Stepping in and out of the boat requires rolling a dexterity check
>When someone fails, the entire table erupts in laughter... And I sit silently. Not trying to be an butthole, but I'm looking at a clock hanging on the wall and realizing 40 minutes of my life just got wasted listening to these people do imaginary slapstick with an imaginary boat
>DM eventually says I come along a path
>Party is immediately hostile towards me, but like... trying to be comically so?
>The rogue is immediately trying to steal my things
>The barbarian is threatening me for literally no reason despite me being dressed like a common mercenary... Y'know, the sort of person that helps adventurers
>Continue until the end of the session then tell the DM I'm not interested in the sort of game he's running
You have a lot of patience, by the time they were hostile to my character I would probably just get up to leave. Say I got a phonecall and I need to go, even if I never touched my phone.
I was GM for a group with a lolrandom "it's what my character would do" player.
>lolrandom & party has mission to bring letter to a lord, warned to not to break the realm's tyrannical laws
>In tavern, lolrandom player keeps flirting with waitress long after failing miserably.
>Lolrandom threatens staring patrons, eventually stabbing a patron who talks back with a concealed blade
>Barkeep tells everyone to calm down, lolrandom stabs defenseless barkeep.
>Guards drawn to the commotion arrest lolrandom
>lolrandom spends night intimidating a fellow prisoner instead of planning for escape/tomorrow's trial
>At trial, lolrandom immediately lunged on the judge to an immediate death sentence
No character-logic triggered lolrandom's actions. At least he was a good sport about the consequences.
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Frustrations with morons?
No, I put those behind me after I left my railroading DM and started working on my own games.
It's much better to make and play what you want, than to hinge on a scripted campaign using a broken non-game.
I have better things to do when spending time with friends, I don't need to involve them in my tabletop games, and they certainly don't need to involve me in their BDSM dungeons. Friends can do different things together and have different interests and still enjoy each other's company.
if I wanted to play a totally lolrandom shenanigans game, I'ld play MAID.
Just played that two evenings ago. The story was about the maids taking care of the young master and running after him when he tried to escape the mansion to attend the new skate park inauguration and have a bit of free time outside. The story evolved into the maids invoking the spirit of Tony Hawk and performing sick tricks to impress the teenagers who were bullying the young master. Good times.
Great, now I'm wondering if there's a mod for THPS1+2 that adds maids... ...but eh, thanks for that vivid imagination of a story.
Guessing ye follow Suzushiro on TW.
Bye yeah, good to know MAID can be a game to have fun.
>playing a post apocalyptic setting where the major currency is books
>one guy is playing a snarky book hunter
>breaks off from the party at every opportunity
>likely a high functioning moron because he keeps doing odd things as if he cant read the room
>tries to play it off with a lolrandum act
>example: the party is trying to escape the authorities and get cornered on the end of a dock
>another player maintains that his character has a mortal fear of water for backstory reasons
>lolrandom player says "sounds like a you problem" and dives in to swim off
>eventually the group breaks apart due to some related drama and irreconcilable scheduling problems
I am the table lolrandom player.
>Dungeon of the Mad Mage.
>Everyone else is making practical, optimal characters, meanwhile I just roll 1d20 down the line, and make a Dex Bard that's a Drow.
>Get tired of everyone being super-practical and debating things. Frequently wander off down dungeons by myself to set things off, find other places, or generally move the game along.
>Constantly suggest splitting the party. My advice did get a PC killed at one point, but the player played him like a moron ('run 30ft to chase a backpeddling hobgoblin with a bow, moving at 30ft away. Didn't dash because he didn't want to lose his chance to swing', grade moron.).
>Actively endangers himself and brings moderate heat to party. Never enough to kill them, but enough that they need to barricade things.
>Get into a fight with three Bugbears, fifteen goblins, and then later on, two Ettin. My character, who's a level below everyone, in light armour (the only person not a full spellcaster not in platemail iirc), and is a Bard, just Leroy Jenkins'd his way into charging into the fray first, often alone.
>Everyone else spends gold critically, on weapons, armour, magic items of use. My PC didn't buy a +2 longsword with finesse because "he uses a rapier", and blew all his gold on a staff that transforms into a python he can't even control, because I thought I could use that gimmick at some point.
I'm not a lolrandumb player. I don't hog the spotlight, my pc isn't OP, I don't ruin the table mood or hijack the story. I'm just the guy at the table with more experience about how to have a good game.
How well do the players tolerate your shenanigans? If its all in good fun and you are genuinely entertaining then its cool. If someone has approached you and asked you to tone it down, then its too much.
>Tolerate shenanigans.
I really just have a shenanigan an evening, and while it generally makes the table scream "NOOOOO!", it's never anything truly objectionable, inappropriate, or game risking/ruining.
The regular DM, a bona-fide Grognard, retired, with a wife, kids, and who's played since DnD existed (who probably posts here) has told me multiple times that I'm an incredibly valuable player at the table, and invites me to a lot of his own games he runs at home with his select friend group.
To clarify; this is a new LGS in a small town, a lot of the table can change in between sessions, a lot of players are mild problem players (young kids with little in the way of game etiquette in their capacity, that quite enthusiastically side-track if an idea pops up, teenagers with super-serious 'snowflake' characters that get sulky if their minmaxed PC doesn't take the spotlight, and normie 'cool guy' young adults who treat it like CR, a social event for wisecracks, or actually go full lulzrandumb).
I basically co-DM honestly. He's a Vet, I'm a Vet, most everyone else is (relative to us) new, so most problems above are pretty 'light'.
He DM's, I bump the players and deal with problem players/PC's for him, we get through games.
Yeah I'm sure everybody else is real appreciative of you deliberately causing problems all the time. I bet you're one of those people whose only personality trait is "smug shitposter"
Apologies, posted without updating.
Refer to
, but all I really do is bump the plot in manageable amounts, interact with otherwise ignored PC's, and encourage players to be a bit less afraid to be daring (it's 5e, not OW), while being the one who'll die first.
Frankly, this is more interesting to me these days than trying to play only for myself if the table/game isn't good quality for a truly compelling story (and this is an open table in an LGS).
It's just a fact man, though I should have clarified.
I'm playing in an LGS with mostly new players, and I've played in several different systems, in various different groups of different (and often extreme) outlooks on crunch, lethality, and subject limits, all reflected in their games.
I don't overshadow anyone, I just provide nudges for the players, chances for the DM to implement things, and help the DM (who's an absolute quality Grog, but who doesn't run anything truly dangerous) to run a session the rest of the table will find immersive.
>I'm just the guy at the table with more experience about how to have a good game
You are so cringe man
I guess I have two stories
A kenku player that just repeated stupid stuff all the time, gave away our location twice by crowing loudly
At least he rolled well in his bullshit all the way till he got impaled on a trap, can't complain since it didn't last long and the next character was more normal
Someone roleplaying Krieg from Borderlands in a mecha fantasy setting, it wasn't as grating as one would expect but maybe I'm biased because a guy riding a not Eva screaming about poetry for pigs, the president loins being on fire or wiener stealing ghosts did have some decent moments and the guy playing this c**t was actually a total bro outside of the game, I couldn't stay mad at the guy
I really don't have a horror story to share, just two "eh it could be better" situations
I once tried to DM for my younger brother and his friends. Once.
Before this, they had attempted to run D&D amongst themselves. I only ever heard stories, but the one thing I remember sticking out was the time their DM decided that it began to rain Wish Blades.
They expected more of that kind of bullshit. I made them fight rats in a basement. They nearly TPK'd and the weeby edgelord rogue died.
His tears were sweet.
>Anon has a table primed for all kinds of fantastical weeby, campy shit and unashamed edge, but no skill enough to run a good game for themselves.
>Wastes it by running a "rat in basement" encounter, unironically, and has the PC's so underpowered they nearly TPK.
What a waste.
Don't give out 90% dark Cacao artisan chocolate to kids anon. Save it for the adults, give them something sweet and fun.
>new player
>edgelord character in a lighthearted campaign
>other character decides to try to tame a random rat
>succeeds
>picks up the rat
>"I shoot the rat out of her hands"
>silently groan at his idea of comedy
>party proceeds through the dungeon
>find the cultists they'd been hunting
>they're busy evacuating through a portal
>party diplo-intimidates them into standing down and staying put
>one of the Barbarians picks up a cultist by the neck and intimidates him into spilling the beans
>cultist is just some regular student, besides himself with fear, starts a stuttering explanation of what's going on
>"lol I shoot him out of his hands"
>ask him why in frick's name he wants to do this
>"I just thought it was funny because I also did it with the rat"
And of course this fricker gets irate every time his own character got knocked down a peg. He b***hed and moaned about receiving 1 point of damage a few sessions earlier.
>DM
Have you tried not playing D&D?