Real talk time

How many of you would ACTUALLY an entire Vaporeon? I know the meme has been going strong for years, but I'm genuinely curious;

If a non-anthro, non-furrified Vaporeon was right in front of you, and consented somehow (maybe through psychic type communication bullshit, IDFC), would you? Could you? With this fox/dog/fish?

Let's even take this a step further. Imagine you didn't have access to psychic type telepathy bullshit, and had to rely on good ol' intuition to determine if the Vaporeon in question even wanted it. Could you still do it? Could you rely on your social aptitude and judgement in your quest for Vaporeon booty? Could you live with the consequences of what may or may not be rape, never knowing whether or not the act was consensual, nevermind the fact that it would be an abomination against Arceus?

Well, /vp/?

Would you actually bang a Vaporeon?

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  1. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    no thanks eevees overrated

  2. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    No, gross. One of favorite Eeveelutions got ruined to just a sex joke. It's not even funny either.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Still weird that it happened to Vaporeon when Syvlein’s right there? Or is it like a Lovander situation were Sylveon be to “obvious”

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >mentioning L*vander on /vp/
        whew

        that aside, I think the guy who posted the original copypasta just had a major fetish for wet women and or squirters, in addition to some other, more obvious fetishes.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          >/vp/ makes fun of Mistah Merriku for being cajoled into being a mouthpiece for Gamefreak for years
          >/vp/ mods and jannies kneel to Gamefreak threatening people who talk about Palworld instantly
          Fricking kek

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            What do you expect? All pokegays are simpering bootlickers. I can’t wait for Pokemon Day’s monumental embarassment. Palworld isn’t even that good, but this year’s obligatory kusoge will look like a joke in comparison.

  3. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I would never cheat on my Garchomp wife.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >pelvic integrity

  4. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Yes. Although I think Eevees are overrated and there are better mons to frick.

  5. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    If Vaporeon was the only Pokémon to exist, then yes I would. She would take my first kiss and virginity and I would love her until the day she dies.
    If other Pokémon exist, no, because my heart belongs to another.

  6. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Is it JUST Vaporeon or have I been teleported to a world where Pokemon exist? If it's literally just Vaporeon, in the real world, real world physics apply, yeah I go for it. If I'm in the Pokemon world, no, I do not go anywhere near a monster than can conjure magic torrents of water.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Reminder that, in the Pokemon world, humans have absurd durability a la Monster Hunter.

      For examples, see literally every time Pikachu uses an electric type move on a human. I'm pretty sure the amperage on those attacks is well above 1 amp.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Anime isn’t canon

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Kukui takes attacks regularly to do research, and is perfectly healthy. He's not crippled, scarred, or maimed.
          Lance's Dragonite hyper beamed a guy, who was still alive and kicking afterwards

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Alive, yes. Kicking, ehhhh...

            Agree on these points, though. Human superdurability is not just exclusive to the anime.

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Play PLA. You can only take so many jolts from a shinx before blacking out.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Reminder that Vaporeon's level up movepool is dogshit, it probably couldn't realistically hurt you, let alone present a threat to your life.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >goes to the Vaporeon movelist to post some random bullshit move that would feasibly kill someone
        >realize that the best STAB special attack available to Vaporeon before level 40 is fricking water pulse
        LMAO

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Yup
          It's the curse of Pokemon XD.
          You get Vaporeon, thinking it will be great, only to realize that with no Surf HM, Vaporeon has no moves.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        you've never seen a Vaporeon Hydro Pump in battle

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          You haven't either

  7. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >and consented somehow
    Aren't pokemon more or less sentient, and fluent in their trainer's language?
    Like they dont just respond to battle commands, you can have a full on conversation with them, its just that most of them can't speak back to you because of morphology.
    You could literally just ask the Vaporeon if it was dtf and it could nod.
    Also, screwing a sentient fox-dog-fish is barely any different than something like an Asari or a Vulcan or whatever other sentient non-human things people are dtf.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yes, but I'd rather have my (consensual) way with my Decidueye wife. Or Latias. Or Hisuian Typhlosion. Or Delphox...
      Vaporeon isn't even in the top 10

      >If a non-anthro, non-furrified Vaporeon was right in front of you, and consented somehow (maybe through psychic type communication bullshit, IDFC), would you? Could you? With this fox/dog/fish?
      probably not unless there was a significant prior emotional connection or i was horny out of my mind
      your second question doesn't make sense, frankly. they are definitely capable of making their wishes clear.

      /thread

      Based

      [...]

      >one of the few cases where poke on poke shit works on me because I played Eevee in PMD
      >TFW my PMD pairing doesn't fricking exist in art

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        What's your pairing, anon?

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Torchic girl

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Nice. Is the eevee male or female?

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Oof, hard to find. Still, pretty cute duo.

  8. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Yes, and yes
    But it's not near the top of my bucket list

  9. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I 100% would. Pokemon are intelligent enough that they can give implied consent. Hell, Pokemon and people used to get married back in the day!

    But to be perfectly honest, I would rather turn Glaceon into a creamsicle instead.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah I’m thinking based
      I love my wife Glaceon

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah I’m thinking based
      I love my wife Glaceon

      Based

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    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah I’m thinking based
      I love my wife Glaceon

      Reminder that she's canonicly the VeePee mods' favourite onahole!

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Trips confirm best wienersleeve
        She’ll always be my favorite

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >successfully raping a being that has superpowers

      based

  10. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Gooey, sopping wet Vapussy just sounds really, really nice.
    Pokémon seem to be able to communicate their feelings just fine, and if they don't wanna do something they'd attack you.

  11. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Yeah

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Then I can't wait to be a gym leader's ace when I grow up

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Humans have max IVs
        >Pokemon born from humans + pokemon have max IVs
        Checks out.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Humans have max IVs
          Wow, our BST must be fricking terrible.

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            Of course, but the existence of psychics and martial artists who can fight pokemon implies that humans can not only have a typing but also earn EVs.

  12. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >If a non-anthro, non-furrified Vaporeon was right in front of you, and consented somehow (maybe through psychic type communication bullshit, IDFC), would you? Could you? With this fox/dog/fish?
    probably not unless there was a significant prior emotional connection or i was horny out of my mind
    your second question doesn't make sense, frankly. they are definitely capable of making their wishes clear.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      This, the only thing that makes pokemon ‘attractive’ is prior emotional connections

  13. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Cue the replies either denying it way to hard or going >consent.

    Anyway consensual sex with the slippery wet fishdog is a-okay.

    >an abomination against Arceus?
    Fool, have you not read the sinnoh texts? arceus ordaines it.

  14. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    What, right now, if she was right in front of me in real life? Probably, just because I'd know that I'd never get another chance to frick a pokemon. Don't think I'd be particularly into it though.

  15. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >it got deleted after reaching bump
    lol

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      lol

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        [...]
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        Is it just me or has Glaceon become /vp/‘s favorite vee in recent years? Makes me wonder if the dude at gamefreak who keeps making her ass fatter every gen browses this site

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Glaceon is also popular with r/eevee thanks to u/overdrive who kept posting lewd suggestive glaceon art

  16. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Only if I was also turned into a pokemon.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      You're telling me if your beloved Espeon sat next to you and telepathically said "Lets have puppies, master" you wouldn't be even slightly interested?

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        I go
        >wait, puppies? I thought you were a cat.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Then she replies
          >what the hell is a "cat" anon?
          >did you forget to take your meds again?

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            I WILL NOT TAKE MY MEDS YOU CAN'T MAKE ME

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Based

  17. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    i really don't like the eevees. give me something like scyther, though, and i absolutely would.

  18. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    No because those fine and frills are made with sharp spines. I absolutely would a Zoroark however.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      artist?

  19. 4 months ago
    Anonymous
    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Where do you think you are?

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >groomer board, chud.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Not even /vp/ beat down jokes to the ground as much to your average ironic zoophile.

  20. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I prefer other pokemon

  21. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Yes, i would, but why are you asking this op? Are you gonna publish this on a puritan moron subreddit to be all like "lol lookz at le degenerates xdd!!!"?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      No, because I don't have THAT much brain damage.

      I'm asking so I can gauge how many of you are thirsting for Vappy ironically vs unironically.

      Leddit puritans can take their self-righteousness and shove it up their asses. When the chips are down, they're not any less degenerate than we are.

  22. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    ^he molest kids in real life.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Yes, but that's unrelated

  23. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Sir
    It is a dog, if anyone actually fricked a dog on vp then I'd have to report it to police

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      It is a sapient fish-dog that can consent to sexual intercourse. If you're going to report an anon fricking that to the cops, then you'd have to report them to the police for having consensual sex with a human woman.

  24. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Depends. Just how fish-like would an actual vaporeon be, exactly? Like on a scale of zero to ten, mammal to fish, where does it sit?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      slimy and smelly probably

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      think dolphin

  25. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Maybe if its front half is behind a wall I guess, besides, I always like human girls

  26. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    i would rather a lucario, and as far as quadrupeds, i'd prefer one bigger than me, like arcanine so i feel less guilty (i'd feel like they'd have more control of the situation), but as far as the eevees, either umbreon or flareon's my fav. most people will lie to you and say they have no feelings for them but e621 says otherwise.

    i tend to like blue mons, not just lucario, so it's extra weird that i just don't really want vaporeon. maybe it's because i think it would feel like touching a dolphin. idk how many people actually wanna frick a dolphin.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >"Would you actually bang [an Eeveelution]?"

      also it sort of depends on your definition of "bang". if by "bang" you mean "kiss his ass" and "take a massive stinky dump in my mouth", then yes.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      dolphins feel like a muscular wet human. like, smooth and firm, yet pliable.
      I have to imagine its probably very similar to the Splatoon inklings. You know, rubbery but in a nice way.

  27. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    It's a magical creature with intelligence on par with human and enough strenght and skills to take down an adult human. If Vaporeon or any other Eeveelution would want to frick me, there would be absolutely nothing that I could do with it.
    ...And to be frank, why would I want to stop it? All Eeveelutions are made for human wiener!

  28. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    is this homosexual shit

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      It’s purposefully ambiguous, anon
      Freud would like to have a word with you

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >le ebin freud
        female characters tend to have long eyelashes dumbass

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        What does an old israeli fraudster (who had gone crazy from searching for a fish with human genitals that he once dreamed of) have to do with anything ITT?

  29. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    i'm pretty sure i've seen more panels where the trainer is female and getting shagged
    whether it's the same artist or some other person adding on their take, idk

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Another artist's take, Porldraws on Twitter. They drew both male and female Zorua, male Eevee

  30. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Genuinely the hottest thing I’ve seen in the past month. I love this dynamic so much

  31. 4 months ago
    Anonymous
  32. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I will not explain myself to someone who's younger than my PokeSexo fetish is, OP you fricking zoomer tourist!
    I have finally found it, so now I can finally kiss my sister as promised…

  33. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >dog
    stopped reading

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Vaporeon can consent tho

  34. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    100% would if given the chance

  35. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    It would need to be super provocative and flirtacious-- like, constantly trying to nudge and get at my dick. That's the only way I'd ever go for it. A Vaporeon acting animalistic and pet-like doesn't pique my arousal, it's usually the art that depicts it as horny and sexually initiative that get me hard. So, if it's a horny loose Vaporeon, I'll frick it til the cows come home. If it's a normally behaved one, it'll be my buddy and we'll go on walks and adventures.

    I have full mastery over my mind and sex drive-- something you betas wouldn't understand.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Last part seems like a cope

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Sounds like projection. You don't like it when people are confident

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      But all Pokemon are canonically sapient and anthropomorphic, so canon Vaporeon could be just as flirty and humanlike as a human.

  36. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Eh, maybe. But only because Vaporeon is more of a bro than a sexomon in my eyes. I'd rather just be friends with one.
    But if one made it very clear it was down to frick? Yeah, I would. At that point it's more like fricking an alien than screwing a dog in my eyes.
    Replace the vap with a Ninetales or Espeon however... zero hesitation at all if they undeniably consent. Still only if they made it clear they were into it, the consentpill goes deep in me. Would feel wrong if it wasn't clear, and not too keen on getting my dick burnt off or on getting telekinetic testicular torsion either.

    [...]

    I'd honestly rather have this thoughever. Not even a big TFscholar but that really activates my almonds.

  37. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Never really understood why Vaporeon got the meme, honestly.
    Just seems so random, I never liked the fins or the neck frill.

    ...Assuming female, I can't impregnate her, and she doesn't have some kind of gross animal pussy:
    >regular Vaporeon
    No.
    >regular Vaporeon, but we can communicate somehow and she's attracted to me for some reason
    Still no, though I'm sure we'd talk a lot. I'm sure Palworld would blow her mind. If she's straight-up isekai'd from the games or the anime, I'd show her the game/anime she's from just to REALLY blow her mind. Wouldn't be surprised to end up sleeping together (no sex) though
    >same Vaporeon, but she's straight-up okay with ANYTHING
    Honestly, probably? I've got a nasty inflation fetish and I would 100% have her reenact those gags from the anime about water getting trapped inside a Pokemon and making them inflate.
    Doubt I'd be able to do anything too crazy though, since I have almost no privacy in my current living situation, both indoors and out.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >I can't impregnate her
      Poor infertile anon

  38. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    >post-tf dynamics
    oh sweet baby jesus this shit is my jam

  39. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    brap!

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Why can’t she be real bros

  40. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Is there any more fanart of these two together?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Have you tried the sauce?

      Nice. Is the eevee male or female?

      That's me and I don't have AGP, so male, duh.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        I did but i cant find any more fan art besides that comic from before

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Maybe the artist will draw more, better keep an eye on xitter

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Doesn't appear to be.

  41. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I would never frick a vaporeon but if I had an Eevee I would stretch her pussy every single day

  42. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >DUDE EPIC FUNNY VAPOREON COPYPASTA XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Everything I don't like is reddit.

  43. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    >real animals
    That line is not to be crossed. Stop making the rest of us look worse than we already do.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Dolphins are fair game through

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        Fine but its only okay if it tries to rape you first. Then thats just self defence

  44. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    If Vaporeon can give consent, I make love to the fish cookie. If Vaporeon can’t give consent, I rape the fish cookie. But either way, I’m pleasuring myself with this fish.

  45. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    anon I wouldn't even need consent, I would rape it. I've raped hot dogs before

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