So, Neutral? As he has no sense of right and wrong, he is not good nor evil.
Stand completely still. Their vision is motion based. Some people might feel the need to cross themselves to ward off his evil magic but DO NOT DO THIS the wizard might interpret it as an aggressive arcane sigil and unleash a torrent of violence on you before you have a chance to get divine protection.
>His wizards aren't unhinged lunatics or autistic savants incapable of understanding normal people for all their magical knowledge
Why even call them wizards?
I tried to befriend a wizard once, he flayed my soul and made me his undying servant trapped in an animated suit of metal armour for 300 years. Thankfully some adventurers came by, slew the sorcerer, and freed me from my torment. My soul is still flayed but at least I don't have to clean his used tissues every night.
My group literally has an in joke that, when reading any fiction about people being needlessly or stupidly cruel they assume a wizard is behind it. >lore bit about a litttle girl who was kidnapped and murdered to be revived as a cyborg slave... dog walker >literally a dog walker, they did that to have a slave who'll walk their dogs >"why would a wizard do this?" "fricking wizards man..." "no sense of right or wrong..."
>On the table you find a note written by the foreman that he had to go home early due to having to tend a sick child but invites you to come back on Monday >The wizards anticipate our every move...
>/tg/
I sincerely hope this is not a /tg/ thing. Wizards have absolutely no fricking sense of right or wrong, and it's practically a trope across all media.
By the opening of this board you are hereby recruited into the Wizard Defence Initiative, or WDI. Humanity at large are no aware of the danger that wizards pose to not only individuals and institutions, but to the timeline itself. On this board you will learn how to identify a wizard, subvert a wizard, and if need be- do battle with a wizard. Please consult the appended reading material for your introductory courses which you may peruse as an introductory to on-site facility training you will receive. A WDI officer will contact you with further information.
In The Mundane We Trust
Chief Recruitment Officer Anon, WDI, Department of Terrestrial Affairs
My witch hits on him, then continues on her way, giving him no further hints.
He will realize this 20 years later.
It's very rare for wizards to realize the witch is hitting on them in the moment.
Stand completely still. Their vision is motion based. Some people might feel the need to cross themselves to ward off his evil magic but DO NOT DO THIS the wizard might interpret it as an aggressive arcane sigil and unleash a torrent of violence on you before you have a chance to get divine protection.
I suppose we'd ask him for a quest. To be a truly stereotypical wizard, you're ancient and mighty but refuse to do any job yourself when you can find putzes to do it for you for some gold (which you can just conjure from the aether anyway).
That guy reminds me of when magic actually felt... well, magical. I'm thinking of homebrewing a low magic setting where spellcasters are extremely rare, like a party would only have one sorcerer/wizard/warlock and they would be lucky to welcome another one. Accomplished magic users would be your stereotypical old men or ladies due to the years and decades it takes to channel and master magic, and even then, even the most brilliant of them would only manage to scratch the surface of what magic truly is.
Ancient wizards loved memes too the memes just hadn't been invented yet. >The wizard giggles Everytime someone mentions a cake, people who are named Kenneth, when people draw attention to orbs and other spheres, whenever people mention the land of Hamburg, and keeps mentioning a a substance call co-cane.
I react stereotpyically?
We're not going in the piss forest.
>but I, the WHIZZARD,
Give him some of our gold and be on our way
>Detect Evil
He already said you saw a wizard
So, Neutral? As he has no sense of right and wrong, he is not good nor evil.
Is this really how /tg/ perceives wizards?
>His wizards aren't unhinged lunatics or autistic savants incapable of understanding normal people for all their magical knowledge
Why even call them wizards?
I tried to befriend a wizard once, he flayed my soul and made me his undying servant trapped in an animated suit of metal armour for 300 years. Thankfully some adventurers came by, slew the sorcerer, and freed me from my torment. My soul is still flayed but at least I don't have to clean his used tissues every night.
My group literally has an in joke that, when reading any fiction about people being needlessly or stupidly cruel they assume a wizard is behind it.
>lore bit about a litttle girl who was kidnapped and murdered to be revived as a cyborg slave... dog walker
>literally a dog walker, they did that to have a slave who'll walk their dogs
>"why would a wizard do this?" "fricking wizards man..." "no sense of right or wrong..."
Mad scientists are indistinguishable from wizards
>On the table you find a note written by the foreman that he had to go home early due to having to tend a sick child but invites you to come back on Monday
>The wizards anticipate our every move...
This inspires me to blame my own wizards.
>/tg/
I sincerely hope this is not a /tg/ thing. Wizards have absolutely no fricking sense of right or wrong, and it's practically a trope across all media.
By the opening of this board you are hereby recruited into the Wizard Defence Initiative, or WDI. Humanity at large are no aware of the danger that wizards pose to not only individuals and institutions, but to the timeline itself. On this board you will learn how to identify a wizard, subvert a wizard, and if need be- do battle with a wizard. Please consult the appended reading material for your introductory courses which you may peruse as an introductory to on-site facility training you will receive. A WDI officer will contact you with further information.
In The Mundane We Trust
Chief Recruitment Officer Anon, WDI, Department of Terrestrial Affairs
Any wizard that has access to 8th level spells and above is already become chaotic evil, anon. You should know this already.
Stereotypically. Either bid him "good day!" from their garden bench, or mistake him for an old lady and offer to carry him over a stream.
Pickpocket his spellbook.
Pull a sword out of a stone and see how he reacts
Seduce him being the party members are bawds.
>Thieve rolls initiative
>Backstabs for 9000 damage
>pssht, nothin' personal kid
How do you backstab when the wizard was facing you? You fail, the wizard casts a fireball, killing you instantly.
uhm.... simply teleport behind the wizard.
the wizards contigency activates and it cast assassin be gone.
psssh...you think your magic tricks will work on a TRUE assassin, old man?
forgive me master...I'll need to go all out...just this once...
>Don't make eye contact, don't make eye contact
>GOOD MORROW!!
>SHIT SHIT SHIT HE SAW JUST ACT COOL
My witch hits on him, then continues on her way, giving him no further hints.
He will realize this 20 years later.
It's very rare for wizards to realize the witch is hitting on them in the moment.
Stand completely still. Their vision is motion based. Some people might feel the need to cross themselves to ward off his evil magic but DO NOT DO THIS the wizard might interpret it as an aggressive arcane sigil and unleash a torrent of violence on you before you have a chance to get divine protection.
Receive serious love.
>"May I try your wizard beer?"
I suppose we'd ask him for a quest. To be a truly stereotypical wizard, you're ancient and mighty but refuse to do any job yourself when you can find putzes to do it for you for some gold (which you can just conjure from the aether anyway).
Greet him politely, ask whether he requires any assistance, then go on with my day. Wizards deserve respect and kindness too, you know.
I accept his offer and drink of his milk.
We're fricked.
Memes aside, that's pretty accurate for a swords & sorcery wizard.
I cynically wait for the twist.
They refuse to give him money but, somehow, give him money anyway.
Contact his lawyer
>omg look at Her
>pointed hats are so last Millennium
I like to accumulate maximum hubris before being turned into a frog.
what do you mean, should? the party reacts however they will. why would I get a say in it?
I ask him about his homebrew ale.
break fingers and jaw
Apply appropriate countermeasures.
That guy reminds me of when magic actually felt... well, magical. I'm thinking of homebrewing a low magic setting where spellcasters are extremely rare, like a party would only have one sorcerer/wizard/warlock and they would be lucky to welcome another one. Accomplished magic users would be your stereotypical old men or ladies due to the years and decades it takes to channel and master magic, and even then, even the most brilliant of them would only manage to scratch the surface of what magic truly is.
Yeah okay but I am roleplaying my wizard as a contemporary human who loves memes.
Ancient wizards loved memes too the memes just hadn't been invented yet.
>The wizard giggles Everytime someone mentions a cake, people who are named Kenneth, when people draw attention to orbs and other spheres, whenever people mention the land of Hamburg, and keeps mentioning a a substance call co-cane.
>A wizard's second sight is just the Internet
That would explain why so many of them are depraved lunatics.
>lolsorandumb XDDD
And his staff is just a big spork, LOL!
>"What's up, my wizza?"
Only they can use that word
Fear.