To celebrate the upcoming Nintendo Direct, post the fakest sounding direct you can
Winner gets nothing
To celebrate the upcoming Nintendo Direct, post the fakest sounding direct you can. Winner gets nothing
To celebrate the upcoming Nintendo Direct, post the fakest sounding direct you can
Winner gets nothing
Super Mari-Roll. A katarmi style game in the mushroom kingdom.
>tfw the biggest telltale that a direct is fake is actually having games in it that fans want
It's sad, isn't it?
Finally, some good games are announced
Metroid Prime 4 is so happening u guys!
You'll see it will be there and will totally justify buying a switch way back in 2017!
We're gonna get actual good games this time.
TOTK DLC
MARIO KART 9
DKC64 VC
MONSTER HUNTER 4U SWITCH
New F-Zero
Metroid VI, Metroid Prime 4, new Star Fox, new F-Zero. All four titles will be excellent releases and have nothing mediocre.
I wish.
Dragon Quest news
Silksong shadow drop.
A bunch of shit no one cares about followed by a bunch of posts on Ganker about how prime 4 is dead.
Then some cope post about how some shitty game that no one cares about is actually a secret gem and how nintendo always wins.
Then about a bunch of gold faces and people flying into a bunch of anuses and crying wojaks until the week is over.
Big Maring
Big Ster Faux
Big Dude Deadalaus
Big Meturd 4
Big Dong
Big Frick0
Dirty Nintendo Switch peasants think they're going to get games again. Every third party game released is going to be out on the STEAM DECK!!!
good games are coming out
F-Zero GX remaster in full HD and working online out tomorrow after the Direct ends.
StarTropics reboot by Monolith Soft
dexit is over, folks
the next pokemon game will support every single one of them
Wario Bike
Final Fantasy VI: The Magi War
Ice Climbers: Awakening
Urban Champion 2
Metroid Prime Federation Force HD
Mother 4
Super Mario 128
Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes DLC
PLEASE!
MARIO X DARK SOULS CROSSOVER
KIRBY IN NIGHTMARELAND
LINK VS MORSHU - BOMBS AWAY
NEW VEGAS COMMING TO SWITCH
DONALD TRUMP'S PUNCH OUT
NO Chrono Trigger HD3D remake
Super Smash Bros Ultimate Redux with Geno and Waluigi as the first two playable characters announced.
Persona 6 Switch exclusive.
Bloodborne Kart 2 Fast 2 Furious.
Nintendo Girl Dating Sim.
Samus Aran’s NTR Simulator.
Gollum II: The Repissening
THE LEAKS ARE HERE.
>F-Zero run and has a port for some king title info on switch. I'm heard is the mobile to their classing which demo the should coming next side scrolling release next sides that Direct is been production beside scrolling mario games no one of a bongo peripheral, late 2019, Is open pressure when I went thing.
>Legendo. I don't know when this some release next you'll be a Switch development to releason, which demo thing a system bundles
>big Maring next year
>price of a few year. If you recall be coming to getting that Square Enix is doing The endo. I don's 8th their other handhelds
>next yearthstone phrasiness. And playable. The will not sure when this will no mobile game Freak to battlers care info on games no on game will be coming switch is getting a subscrolling mario announces that
>SEGA will be coming their classic games
>price of the games up of that preparing a systead of sorts in ther 3 is devely for the Switch is getting.
>There is some king to one test tech development their othere is somethink GTA6 will be about next side shope test test tech demon's 8th Generation service of new Animal crossing open working helds
>big Mario announces, that Squary parthstone off that it was card is that GTAV
>Legend of they hopen for some kind of sorts in-game for but will be a release next year
>The Hearticularly. Bandai Namco is development sides to be localizzcon.e to release new Animal Console will care about
>price drop of thing the putting revealed will be coming to reason, which exclusively is animal crossing to based as Metroid is in project giant robot game from a few Animal crossing, but thing to switch. I don't known but I've held have sad this summer.
>price drop starfox battlers coming to ther 3DS in hope to thing that Direct is (or busine te
>Leak.
>ESL.
Seems legit.
Metroid Prime 4
Wario Land 5
New F-Zero
New Golden Sun
Pokemon Stadium 3
New Paper Mario in the same vein as the first two with OCs and all
New traditional 3D Zelda in the same vein as OoT
New Star Fox open world game that completely mogs Starfield
Mother 4
The Conduit 3
Donkey Kong Freedom
Splatoon porn game
Xenoblade Chronicles X2
Disaster: Day of Crisis Remastered
Tokyo Mirage Sessions 2
Project H.A.M.M.E.R.
Banjo Threeie
Furukawa commits suicide on stage
NSO is now free
Ever Oasis remastered
Beyond Good & Evil 2, shadowdrop after the direct
Geist: Resurrected
Grinch announced for Smash
A Kirby spinoff Mystery VN where you play as Rick and solve bizarrely dark crimes.
Features "friendship routes" with other obscure Kirby characters. Kirby himself doesn't appear at all.
Made by SFB Games (the guys who made Snipperclips).
Actual new games instead of ports/remakes/remasters
Turns out he faked his death. Direct opens with him walking into the camera view and explaining the situation. Announces the return of Miiverse and Free Online Multiplayer. Announces Switch 2.
why was he so much more memorable than the current guy who is doing the directs? I don't even remember the current dude's name
There are two dudes, and one of them is a bigger legend than Iwata.
I fricking wish
Alright, let me give you guys the ultimate "Nintendo fan who spends all their time on forums" wish fulfillment
>new 3D Mario game announced with open-ended levels like 64 coming out this holiday
>3D high-budget Zelda game with a return to traditional dungeons announced for next year
>Geno and Isaac coming to Smash Bros Ultimate alongside a new "story mode" expansion pack
>New F-Zero game with cutting edge graphics
>Metroid Prime 4 releasing this september
>Rare returns to making games for Nintendo, Banjo Threeie coming next year
>Golden Sun 1 + 2 remake
>Gamecube Virtual Console, a dozen hit games available right now
>New Mario Party that really emulates the earlier games (not in a half-assed way like Super)
>Turn based Paper Mario returns
>New console Pokemon game in the same vein as Colloseum
>Mother 3 officially localized and available on NSO
>Star Fox returns to form
>Donkey Kong 65
>Custom Robo rerelease
>Fire Emblem 7 remake
>WW+TP ports
>Super Mario RPG remake
>New Mario & Luigi game
>New Punch Out game that's still just as racist as it always was
>Pokemon Conquest 2
>Nintendo Kart with courses and characters from every franchise
>Wario Land 3D
>Kid Icarus Uprising 2
>Hotel Dusk returns
>New Pokemon Mystery Dungeon
>3D Kirby game with even bigger areas + power mixing
>Xenoblade Chronicles X2
>Animal Crossing Gamecube Remake that makes all of the villagers rude again
>Luigi's Mansion 4, bringing back the progression and controls of 1
>Legend of Zelda live action movie
There we go. You can coom now
Mother 3
F-Zero NX never?
Smash Ultimate gets another round of DLC characters, Sakurai makes a joke about being dragged back in to doing Smash.
Metroid Prime 4 finally gets a gameplay trailer and a release window.
A new Starfox game is announced and it's not a repeat of the Lylat War.
>7am PST
Welp, I already know I'm not pulling an all-nighter/getting up to watch this live. I'll just skim it later to see if there's anything of value in it
I'm gonna be enjoying my Sonic info live and without being spoiled lol. Enjoy my sloppy seconds b***h.
Nintendo has once again partnered up with Square Enix to make a NEW Mario RPG. They have wanted this ever since Alpha Dream died and they moved Paper Mario away from RPG mechanics. However, they know that they can't just throw an RPG out in the modern day without giving people a taste and SE have been away from Mario for quite a while. So they decided to remake Legend of the Seven Stars. It will drop after the direct. The original will also go up on the Virtual Console, because they want people to experience the difference between the two. Anyway, in December, we will be getting a NEW RPG in the same remake engine. Super Mario Wonderland RPG. The plot is that Mario has fallen into an alternate universe, where he himself is the villain, while Wario and Waluigi are the heroes trying to stop him. Party members will include Princess Daisy, a cowardly Bowser, Wario and Waluigi as one single character and a fast talking Nabbit named Pepp
Playstation 1 Virtual Console.
>Sex 3: The Sexening
>Sega Classic Coming Collection
>Super Monkey Ball Adventure DX Director's Cut
>Dick Gumshoe Ace Detective
>Shitposting Simulator
Xenoblade Warriors and Kirby's Mystery Dungeon
I don't want to entertain the thought of Tecmo making an OC worse than Lana, thank you very much
>wanting xenoBlack folk musouslop
Super Peach World (2D)
the trailer opens in the sky
there we see mario going through a golden gate, before being met by god, who tells him "your princess was sent to the underworld"
the trailer showcases mario jumping through both the heavens and the underworld, as well as traveling through old locations like subcon, before ending with mario shooting luigi in the balls as the title "Mario Meets God" slowly appears
Nintendo announces that they're going to rework the eshop so it's actually useable
Surprise smash DLC Fighter Pass 3
First 2 characters releasing immediately
Ruaru with the ultrahand
Some anime swordswoman
Pokemon DLC1
Metroid Prime 3 Remake (just upscaling)
Pikmin 4 information
Mario Kart next pass revealed ft. Captain Falcon as a racer
Nintendo actually announces a new console that is worth a damn and not a kid's tablet
we dont need to do that,every leaker is wrong, specially the 2d mario game part.
> a whole new 2d mario, at 6 years of the switch lite?
>a week after the announcement of the new classic sonic 2d game?
the only way that shit could be even more fake, is if they said the game is not gonna be part of the New SMB series... oh wait! THEY SAID IT!
and then theres the Snes game remake from 1997. the only game of importance released by nintendo that year was Kirby Dream Land 3... i like kirby, but its obvious that game doesnt merit a remake, specially considering how different it is from the usual kirby fare.
Metal Gear Rising 2 announced
GodHand port
Megaman ZX3
Prototype 1&2 ports
Mother 3
Zero confirmed for Smash Bros.
Here, have my compedium
Alright, here we go.
>SMRPG remake announced
>Mario Kart DLC announced, Geno's the character
>An extra Smash bonus fighter, it's also Geno
>Thinking they'd shill Geno that hard
>Especially after they cut him from the Superstar Saga remake
You'd even be lucky to get the Mario RPG remake.
>post the fakest sounding direct you can
Fug, I forgot. For once, OP wasn't the gay, it's me
It's okay. You're right about the remake
a new doko demo issyo game gets announced
Post the fakest sounding direct I can?
Okay.
>Kid Icarus Uprising gets a port
>Direct isn't 30 minutes of filler
>Pokemon DLC won't take up at least 5-10 mins of the broadcast
I would throw in a Prime 4 gameplay trailer too but that actually sounds plausible
>New Rhythm Heaven game
>Muramasa Rebirth Port
Gay Mario sex simulator
Silksong exists!
Mother 3 localization
Fzero
that's it
my direct is Fzero
>not one post in the whole thread with more than one reply
From the creators of Bravely Default 2 comes an exciting new take on the match-3 genre! Bravely Default M: Altimer Chronos DX! Designed from the ground up for Switch, this games breaks genres and pushes the platform to Jeter before seen levels of fun! Play stirring match 3 gameplay set to your favorite songs from Bravely Default 1 and 2, plus 5 new songs made just for this new gane! You can also choose and unlock customizable backgrounds from across the Bravely Default series! We hope you'll join us for a while new way to engage with the world of Bravely Default!
>DDLC 2
it's happening!!!!
Nintendo Direct Leaks
>Super Mario Wonder - 2D game. Unique style. 10 playable characters. Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Toad, Toadette, Rosalina, Wario, Waluigi, Donkey Kong. November 10th.
>MK8 Booster Course Pass Wave 5. Waves 7-10 announced in Booster Course Pass 2 for 2024. Wave 5 June 28th.
>Everybody 1 2 Switch gameplay. It looks like shit.
>Metroid Prime 2 & 3 remasters. 2 is a shadow drop. 3 in Fall.
>Pokemon Scarlet and Violet DLC Wave 1. It looks like shit. September release.
>Red Dead Redemption and Half-Life 2 are getting Nintendo Switch ports. No release dates specified for either for some reason
>Mario Party Superstars 2. Takes boards from the GCN games. 100 mini games but looks like some are reused from 1. September 15th.
>Xenoblade Chronicles 3 Noah and Mio amiibo on September 8th alongside new free update. Future Redeemed getting a physical release on same day. Shulk and Rex amiibo announced for 2024.
>Tears of the Kingdom Expansion Pass. "Legacy of the Zonai" and "The Sacred Realm" waves sneak peek. Wave 1 Holiday 2023 and Wave 2 Spring 2024. Free update that allows you to upload and download Autobuild creations online coming in August.
>Encanto game by Bandai Namco coming October 13th
>Fire Emblem: Three Houses: Complete Edition. Contains all DLC and additional content from the Warriors game. October 6th.
>Pikmin 4 gameplay. Online features are showcased
>Super Mario RPG Remake. it's real. Sort of resembles the HD-2D style but it looks more stylized. Holiday 2023
>Super Smash Bros Ultimate - The Endless Crusade. Smash is back with a new Subspace-like DLC Story Mode. No word on any new playable characters. No release date.
Smash Season Pass 3
Starfox Assault Remastered
Metroid Prime Echoes
Final Fantasy 9 remake.
>F-Zero SX - Online multiplayer, with new story mode a la 'GX.' Soundtrack by Michael Angelo Batio, Early 2024
>Xenosaga Trilogy: Entstehung vollkommener Werke - Remastered Xenosaga Trilogy with QOL improvements, Early 2024
>Earthbound Endings - Remake of MOTHER 3. Available digitally at the end of the Direct
>Pizza Tower - Port of the PC masterpiece with an unlockable Wario skin, available next month
>Super Mario Slugfest - New Mario baseball game, August 2023
>Pikmin 4 info dump
>Fantasy Life i - December 2023
>Mario Kart 8 Deluxe Booster Course Packs 7-10 - To be released periodically up through June 2024
>ToTK Expansion Pass - First expansion comes in October, it's a Challenge Mode a la 'Trial of the Sword.' Second comes early 2024, where you explore Ancient Hyrule. Plus 'free' Nobuyuki Hiyama voice pack, available once you buy the pass
>3rd party sizzle reel
>New Super Mario Bros Bah-Bah - New 2D Mario made purely out of spite. Holiday 2023
Super Metroid Remake where Samus is an action figure
Fire Emblem 4 remake (Never played it but one of the characters is now trans)
Mario Party Superstars DLC, they added Creepy Cavern
Donkey Kong Country returns Switch port
New Mario game is called It's a me Mario (2 players only) where one player has to "defeat" Mario by creating enemies and obstacles on the fly on a auto scrolling stage. It's made of soap carvings
Xenoblade 2 remastered
Engage DLC
3 new Kirby gmaes, one is made of magazine clippings
New IP, Open World detective game
Another new IP, also a Open World detective game
>mario farming game, you cultivate mushrooms and various power ups as crops, along with different animals spanning from fake mario critters to some real life ones
>zelda farming game, same as the mario one, but has a resturant that you can use your crops and stuff to make different foods and drinks. you can also run a pharmacy where you sell elixirs and potions of various types. trailer ends with the aliens from majoras mask invading and abducting links cows
>donkey kong farming game, you can only farm bananas and need to switch characters to pick specific banana trees. you also can raise animal buddies (rambi, expresso, etc.) and then use them to race and do other mini games
>metroid farming game, you are an older retired samus working on a futuristic neo farm cultivating space crops and theres a combat aspect where you need to defend your crops from space pirates (end of trailer shows little ridleys attacking crops like crows and samus puts down a scare crow that resembles her suit to shoo them away
>fire emblem farming game, you play as that farming kid from awakening and hes returned home after his journey with robin and crew and has to relearn how to care for his crops and help with his family, its a bit more linear and story based with VN elements
>harvest moon mobile game in the style of pokemon go, no gameplay shown, just a teaser with a dubstep remix of the original games theme
>stardew valley prequel set in an alternate timeline, end of trailer teases a multiversal crossover between the original game, haunted chocolatier, and animal crossing (switch version only)
OP said fakest, not likely
>a slitty eyed human stands in an empty room
>instead of an unnatural American voice over, an actual Japanese voice comes out of his mouth
>his native language is heard
>subtitles in the bottom
that's all I ask, but they insist on showing the chinkiest asiatic and putting the most horrible voice over.
Splat DLC
Pokemon Direct date announcement
Good Feel's game
Metroid 6
Silksong
Hades 2
UFO50
Bloodstained Ritual of the Night 2
More Project Dragon Rune Factory and P5:Tactica
Raincode
Decapolice
Tevi
I am expecting some combination of these. And I am all for it.
Hopefully they have some good unexpected surprise too.
Twilight princess 2 with super realistic graphics
Shadow hearts collecion
Xenosaga episode 4
Silent Hill 1 to 4 collection.
The funny thing about this is it CAN easily happen but the frickers never will
Nintendo 128
It's a home console with 128 TFLOPS of compute power, roughly the size of an ATX form factor desktop computer. The controller is made out of self-assembling nano goo and can take on any shape you want. It comes with a hologram projector and costs $399.
Launch titles are:
F-Zero: Life in the Fast Lane
Mario V Sonic: Dawn of Smash
Metroid Prime 0: Zero Suit, Zero Problem
Wave Race Tsunami
Halo Infinite Plus One
and Final Fantasy 7 Remake: Remake
Launches tomorrow right after the direct.
Two words
>Knack 3
It's time for Big Maring
After all the delays, it's finally here, I can feel it
is there a youtube link up for the stream? all i can find is just influencer homosexuals sharing their shitty take about it
https://www.youtube.com/live/s7t5jnpkCkI?feature=share
thanks bro i hope your waifu turns real and loves you unconditionally
You're welcome. Let's hope there's something good.
>Donkey Kong Country remake with all the original models recovered from a decrepit SGI computer in a dumpster
>Mother 3 remake with clay models
>FE4 remake
>big Maring
Indies, indies, more fricking indies, and then you get Skyrim 2: Starrim.
HOLY SHI-
Kirby's -fricking- themed dream land? Is that where all his erotic dreams are?
Extra premium online tier with the whole 3 Wii U games left to port
7 straight minutes of shovelware
Lego Heavy Rain
Vagrant Story remaster
God of War Racing
DQ X offline english release
Some indie game about being a gay that doesn't talk much and how depressing that is
Dead Cells 2 (with 5 sets of day 1 dlc expansions)
a second attempt at a SMT x FE crossover that feels like you're playing any of those
Diddy Kong spin-off netflix series
>direct is at 10am est
>same time as my stupid bullshit recurring usless therapy
I'd be annoyed if I wasn't so sure that I'm not going to miss any interesting announcement.
>Splatoon spinoff game that is basically Salmon Run 4 Dead, Versus mode and all
and i was going to post more but i made myself mad with how much i want this but know i will never get it. even with all the L4D ripoffs that are releasing lately.
Firmware update that adds full MSX compatibility to the switch (Japan exclusive)
>(Japan exclusive)
too believable
where is DLSS on switch?
There's no AI acceleration functions in it. It's unironically easier to run fsr than dlss on it
A physical Waluigi Pinball pinball machine.
If they remake LTTP with that horrible playmobil artstyle they used for LA, I'm gonna rope myself
>Shin Megami Tensei IV+A and V and VI get announced in a bundle releasing for all platforms
>Paper Mario 64 Remake gets announced and it's confirmed going to be the final game coming to Switch in 2026
>Super Mario RPG 2 and Super Mario RPG Remake are coming to Switch in 2024/2025 respectfully.
>Mario Maker 3 releases in 2023.
>F Zero GX Remake gets announced along with a new game in development
>Golden Sun 4 gets announced along with a couple new games in development
>Super Mario Oddysey 2 and Super Mario 128 get announced
>Fire Emblem getting multiple remakes at the same time
>Kirby game that actually features Zero 3
>Smash Brothers Ultimate 2 releasing in 2025
>Megaman Battle Network 7 exclusive to Switch for a year.
>Chrono Trigger remake coming 2023
>Tears of the Kingdom DLC pass that features more than 2 DLC's
>Star Fox 2 NSO release along with the announcement of Star Fox 3
>MOTHER 3 NSO announcement followed by MOTHER 4 and MOTHER 2 Remake
>Kingdom Hearts Chain of Memories 2 exclusive to Switch
>opens with an Air Ride 2 announcement featuring Blue Falcon as a playable vehicle
>Banjo Fourie: The Search for Banjo Threeie trailer with Grant Kirkhope returning to do the OST
>Zelda movie trailer by Studio Ghibli, featuring Yuri Lowenthal as Link and Laura Bailey as Zelda
>Pokemon Warriors: Burning Crimson and Pokemon Warriors: Deep Azure trailer, featuring version-exclusive playable Pokemon
>Remainder of MK8D roster is revealed (Vivian, ROB, DK Jr, and Movie Mario)
>Pikmin 4 segment shows off Ice Pikmin and customizable rockets
>Persona 3 Reload trailer announces that FeMC and The Answer are timed switch exclusive features that will come to other platforms as paid DLC
>Final announcement is the Switch 2 reveal, where Koizumi pleads for the audience's forgiveness for the lack of backwards compatibility