What is the most Alpha Male class? And why is it barbarian?
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UFOs Are A Psyop Shirt $21.68 |
What is the most Alpha Male class? And why is it barbarian?
What is the most Alpha Male class? And why is it barbarian?
UFOs Are A Psyop Shirt $21.68 |
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UFOs Are A Psyop Shirt $21.68 |
Weird way to spell "bard". Bards are most alpha male because they frick. All the time.
>bardgays spend their whole lives and career trying to pull b***hes while they flock naturally to barbarianchads
sad
Bards are for failed theater kids. They pretend to be chads, and their characters obsess over getting girls, but they literally rely on rolls for their pretend charisma to work.
I play an Unarmed fighting Bard that is basically Macho Man Randy Savage. He's too busy caving Drow faces in with his fists, suplexing Xanathar guildees, and elbow-dropping Zhentarim.
He is level 8 currently and probably has the highest kill count of the party.
I'm curious, what edition and build are you doing to get that. Its the first time I've read about a Bard and actually thought he was manly
5e. I took the feat from Tasha's that allows me to pull one fighter Martial style.
He is dragonborn for the +2 STR and +1 CON.
+1 CHA, god I fricked that up.
I can do a passable Randy Savage voice and I mostly have the Macho Mannerisms down pat. I use Randy Savage-like hand movements and gestures as the somatic components of his spells. I took Tough at 4 and now the rest of his build is just going to be pure stats. GM gave me knuckle dusters to wear so that I can qualify for +1 weapons with my fists and since they are magic they can bypass some immunities.
He can go from making Bardic musical performances in taverns to wrestling with drunks and npc adventurers, and then doing perform checks in the middle of the street so everyone in waterdeep can watch him flex, while he gives bodybuilding tips.
Recently he was making perform checks and intimidate checks as we were in Skullport busting up the Xanathar guild, and after a very difficult battle we managed to defeat Xanathar.
The dipshit beholder had to learn the hard way that the Cream always rises to the top!
What was the feat you took
I always forget the name of it, but it's pretty easily found in Tasha's. Fighting Initiate, I think. It allows you to take one fighting style from the fighter, and I grabbed unarmed for the 1d8 unarmed strike damage and the 1d4 automatic grapple damage.
Forgot to mention he's college of Valor Bard. Since 6th level he has extra attack and often uses his bonus action to grant others a 1d8 Inspiration that can go to Attack rolls or AC.
I'm gonna slap together this build and play test it. Sounds fun, might play as a side character in current game of 5e
It is hilariously fun. With expertise and so many skills, and being able to give inspiration, fight hand to hand and wear medium armor, it's SURPRISINGLY versatile.
A friend suggested going Paladin for straight up damage and while that is good, I'm legitimately thinking just to make it more crunchy play-wise to start taking fighter so I can stack juicy ABPs to get STR and CHA/CON to 20 without magic items, and branch off into Battlemaster subclass for more wrestling style shit like disarming, tripping, etc.
A question I forgot to ask, the damage output seems really low. Do you do anything to pump up the unarmed damage? or do you just rely on grapples and spells?
What Bard class mechanics are you actually using? Wouldn't it make more sense to use a martial class if you're going to just play as a martial class? Unless your DM lets you get away with having attacks and grapples count as a performance, though; that'd be sick
>frickboy manprostitutes who get beaten to half-death by the maiden's father
>alpha
The bard just fricks her father too until he's okay with it.
i like rangers because aragorn
The paladin is the alpa male: natural leader (due to high charisma), strong and brave, hypermasculine, calm under pressure et cetera.
Rangers are sigma males. They exist outside of the socio-sexual hierarchy and indeed society itself and are always self-improving, always on that grindset. Even Aragorn was thrust into the position of king, he didn't ask for it. That's because sigma males don't seek out leadership, others naturally look to them for inspiration. Sigma's and alphas are of equivalent dominance, but the alpha climbs to the top of the hierarchy while the sigma voluntarily exists outside of it.
>But anon, that's just horoscope for men!
Yes, and that's why it's based. Because if it weren't based, it'd be for women.
>I bet you think you're a sigma male!
False, I know that I'm a yogurt male.
stay off youtube, you've lost the joke
it's the pathfinder 1e skald
has the charisma and utility of a bard, most of the strength and con of a barbarian, shares rage strength/con and rage powers with everyone because they're bros like that
even steals spells off of other classes lists because it's a spell and they know spells, who gives a shit about rules
no theater kids only rock and murder
It's Paladin, and it's not even close.
Explain is "alpha male" about a paladin?
>Symbol of Law & Order, the very thing that seperates man from moronic animals
>Sacrifices their own well being for a greater purpose and to protect the less fortunate when they cannot do so themselves
>Don's weapons and armor from the most skilled craftsmen, further symbolizing the apex of mankind's potential to create and build
>Both STR and CHA based, the two qualities that best represent the peak of Alpha male
I seriously have no idea how you don't think they are.
>Both STR and CHA based, the two qualities that best represent the peak of Alpha male
Not STR and CON?
A really Charismatic strong guy that goes down like b***h after one uppercut to the face will forever be less alpha than a mf who can actually take a hit and dish out some heavy blows on top of that.
lol nah
So you think a random bodybuilder is more alpha than frickin Mike Tyson?
That'd be like comparing Schwarzenegger and Tyson in their primes. Both are Alpha, but in different ways.
Paladins don't go down after a hit though, and are extremely tanks though, so I don't know why you even bothered bringing that up.
>law and order
>obeying the rules of others
Barbarians live by the rules they choose, not what others choose for them. A man chooses, a slave obeys.
Barbarians are literal incel power fantasies, Anon.
Guaging how women respond to anything is the LEAST alpha take you can possibly make.
Barbarians are the most badass class in the game dude
>Guaging how women respond to anything is the LEAST alpha take you can possibly make.
Alpha gets pussy, sigma is the one that doesn't care what others, especially women, think of them. You don't even know the terms, anon.
In fairness to anon, sigma was added to the Horoscopes for Men hierarchy quite recently
You can also pretty accurately gauge alpha material based on the way women respond. If Paladins are police officers and Barbarians are the wild bordering on criminal outskirters, then women will get wet and throw themselves much more at the latter then the former.
Insert that story of the girl in the car getting held up by a car jacker and her admitting the whole encounter made her horney because of how alpha she thought the robbers actions were
Yeah women go wet for barbarian bvlls like this absolute unit.
absolute chad
Literally just Cleric for 12 year olds.
What's a paladin?
homosexual jesus fanboys
>homo
Take your meds, Spoony
Frick you, Final Fantasy 8 is dogshit and I won't be gaslit into thinking otherwise.
no
cringe
based
Wizard
>that one guy false flagging about fighters not being able to do anything
kek
spotted the martialcuck
Spotted the obese secondary whose only ever played D&D
Anon, Fighters are chad as frick, and by caring what this caster scum thinks you demean us all. He is beneath you, so act like it.
>false flagging
lmfao cope
wizards get shit hitdice
Wizards act on ressentiment and will never accept the fact people (rightfully) view them as weak effete nerds.
wizard*
The only alpha male move is to play something that isn't D&D.
Barbarians are for oversized women with no sense of suppression of emotions.
Warlords are male. They run the damn show.
What about barbarian warlords?
In order
>Barbarian
>Paladin
>Wizard
>Fighter
>Druid
>Gunslinger
>Ranger
>Monk
>Rogue
>Bard
>Sorcerer
>Cleric
>Warlock
>Artificer/Inventor
>Alchemist
the most alpha male class is whatever I happen to be playing at the time
the most beta male class is whatever you happen to be playing
Iä! Iä! Barbaranon fhtagn! I still have that pic of your amazing breasts you posted over on /s/! I summon you to this thread!
post em
Go digging in 4plebs, search for barbarian, LARP, woman, etc. You'll find it eventually. They were very large, round, and supple. Quite sad someone would post them for anonymous coomers on the internet.
It's barbarian because they have the best women
Agreed
Fighter.
>Paladins become immune to fear
>Barbarians do not
Seems pretty obvious to me which is more alpha
Paladins cant rage though
But that's wrong, you moron. The only acceptable answer is monk. If you need a weapon, you ain't alpha.
*Takes Unarmed Fighting Style*
Any bard could kill you both using only his testicles. Trust me I'm a bard.