Your party encounters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A cop.
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Your party encounters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A cop.
Your party encounters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A cop.
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I'm a paladin. So I shake his hand Armstrong and Raiden style and wish him well on his quest for justice and peace
He punches you in the gut for being to dark
Well deserved
Barbarians are more alpha than paladins.
Also cops are chaotic neutral. They don't know the law and they don't care.
>So I shake his hand Armstrong and Raiden
You never actually played the game.
maybe he meant Armstrong and Sig Curtis
What do you mean? Armstrong explains himself, Raiden apologizes for jumping to conclusions, they shake hands, smile, hug, and then the credits roll. That's how the game ends?
He shoots you in the back
I call the megapolice
you wouldn't dare
As long as the party don't act like literal Black folk they'll be fine.
Worse, they act like PCs.
Knowing my players, a police encounter is a natural consequence for their actions.
Some party members look like poodles when they're operating vehicles.
Your party dies.
I shout "I can't breeef!"
I can't sneed!
not just any cop, but a pre-2000s LAPD cop
>DROP THE WAND homosexual. I WILL FRICKING SMOKE YOU, DROP IT NOW!!!
>HE'S CASTING A SPELL! *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM*
>OFFICER NEEDS BACKUP! FRICK! *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM*
>party is long dead
Why is it California that seems to pull this shit? Even NYPD didn't have such a bad rep and that was during the stop and frisk days.
Local police tend to be brutal and corrupt in places organized crime is strong
Name one thing in California that isn’t shit, anon
needles
The environment
Exploding trees tho.
What?
Occasionally, it's very rare, but a tree will explode due to sap and temperature changes. Same thing sometimes happens in Siberia.
>w-well the weather is nic-
California has absolute shit weather that can be blazing hot and muggy during the day but then drop to freezing temps the same evening. And depending on where you live you're not going to be seeing most of that "beautiful environment" anyway because of the fricking smog (which is thanks to the shitty air quality that will frick up your lungs even on nice days). It's the very definition of a "bullshot" state, because it's gorgeous when you can photoshop out the feces and rain but you can't do it when you live there.
You know there’s more to the State than LA and San Francisco right?
That's like saying there's more to the UK than England, or more to the Netherlands than Holland: only the people who live in those areas care.
>t. Amerifat and moronic
I'm from neither of those places and yet I do care and I do know how much butthurt the locals get if you confuse things around. You woud to, if you'd get a proper education.
I woudn't criticize others' education if I were you, champ.
>how much butthurt the locals get
That's exactly what I was saying. I'm not sure what your idea of a proper education is, but it certainly doesn't include reading comprehension.
You know I can relate to Caligula on a quote of his only rather than Rome it's California: "If only it had a neck..."
>turn off water imports
>immediately turns back into dust bowl that instantly catches fire because they gutted their forestry services to clean up literal mountains of shit and drug needles in their cities
The citizens of California should just go back to living like the natives did
It's the cutting edge of global technology and culture and it's basically paradise as far as the environment goess.
>b-but I saw a video of shoplifters
Cope
>It's the cutting edge of global technology
Counterpoint: It's the cutting edge of the global technology that's transforming the internet from the Wild West of free speech into a well-regulated platform where a small cabal of corporations has a bigger say on what information you can and cannot access/broadcast than most governments.
Sorry, I like weather.
sex
gay sex involves a lot of shit anon
I wouldn’t know, gay
The weather and the environment, California is gorgeous. The internet in the high pop areas out there is outstanding too, but you have to suffer with the fricking degenerates that ruined the place to get it. So, frick that.
I mean, it does kind of produce one of the largest tax surpluses. People forget that for all it takes in taxes, it gives out even more and sustains many of the lesser states, like the flyovers and south.
People forget that california, texas, and new york are essentially carrying the rest of us, and like to make fun of the success of these places.
>People forget that california, texas, and new york are essentially carrying the rest of us, and like to make fun of the success of these places.
Economically, yeah, but while Cali and Texas could also support themselves agriculturally New York can't due to mostly making cheese
well, whatever, doesn't stop them from being the giant oxen carrying the rest of our plows.
California doesnt grow staple crops, they can't live off of a small amount of grapes almonds and weed.
They can't even water their own crops because they are too fricking stupid to into desalination.
That's federal taxes dipshit.
That pays for federal bullshit, not state level.
Literally has no effect on other states.
I want you to go look into how many states accept Federal funds to help with their various projects and infrastructure, never mind all the other shit.
I think you should look it up yourself and learn the difference between discretionary spending and mandatory spending.
They pay mostly for snap and tanf and section 8 so that parasites can flood the breadbasket like the mongrelized hives they created.
Dunning Kruger is going ham in your sloped brainpan.
>They don't pay for anything! They just subsidize the main thing of usefulness we do, and our main point of pride
hmmm
>Literally has no effect on other states.
are you fricking moronic
where do you think shithole red states get their gibs if not from the federal surplus overwhelming paid for by well to do blue states (or in Texas' case the big blue cities).
Through the federal government, like everyone else.
Frick people who think money is all that matters and frick people who think that this is a contest rather than a cooperative game all the states are playing
Divide and conquer. You are cattle to them. Have nothing, be happy.
It is cooperative between the states but when flyovers make blanket statements about the big states, it's worth reminding them that they couldn't survive without California.
t. North Carolinian with a brain
It is a cooperative game, and the vast majority of states are objectively failing by the method of scoring we have devised to determine human rank (money). They then need to be carried by more successful states.
>method of scoring ~~*we*~~ have devised to determine human rank (money)
>it was the israeliteS who invented money, yes, the selection of powerful humans based on wealth cannot possibly predate abrahamic religions
Seethe harder.
What, next are you going to complain that ((they)) invented the violence inherent in the system that originated thousands of years before them?
Fricking soccer moms blaming incredibly modern things for ancient problems.
>red states yammer on about how they hate the blue states and blue states are shitholes and they don't need them
>blue states remind red states that red states objectively need them
>i-it's not about the money we're all friends right guys
Red states don't like being told that they are, by and large, objective failures at sustaining themselves. They require constant life support from international shipping to grow their crops and from big cities to subsidize them.
>Red states don't like being told that they are, by and large, objective failures at sustaining themselves
They should quit picking fights online then and find better hobbies than watching compilation videos of shoplifting in LA
Red states inherently act against their own best interests, anon.
It's why hundreds of years later they -still- need reparations to operate, and haven't rebuilt for themselves.
>that red states objectively need them
None of the federal programs that californians vote for are needed.
lol
Your post is wrong. Federal welfare spending is not needed or asked for. That a state that is 30+% black has a net negative cobtribution to these programs is not only expected but completely unavoidable. If you prefer to end these federal programs, by all means, we do too.
>we want the programs to end
>repeatedly vote for candidates that push corn subsidy
hmmm
Section 8 alone is twice as expensive as total us agricultural subsidies.
>we don't need housing, they cry, while shipping their homeless to more affluent cities by the busload every week
hmmmm
When you feed the pigeons, more come.
>it's not OUR fault we keep shipping you legions of homeless!
lol
We don't. You're looking for excuses.
>it's not us doing this, ignore the mysterious weekly shipments of meth heads with southern and flyover accents
lol
Yeah I will ignore the shit you just made up. Protip, moron, meth addicts don't move away from the dealer.
>falling into a state of strict denial of reality rather than face the well documented state of homeless shipping
lol
t. Your ass
>pointing out the flaws in his own education
lol
it's always kind of great how conservatives will post unsourced shit like this
then get salty when you point out the consequences of their actions.
>The deep south is full of blacks? Do you have a source?
>Obviously I don't need a source that all our homeless are rural whites bussed in fron other states though. Educate yourself.
Liberals are moronic, democracy was a mistake, and the state of israel must be destroyed
>trying to prove that the south has blacks, utterly ignoring the statement that the south doesn't need the welfare
lol, dishonest shit as always.
also, continuing on, I think I've found a big reason why conservative states tend to be more racist.
To the more liberal states, there is no visible difference between a black man and a white man from a conservative state. They're all meth heads.
That was me. The south doesn't need welfare. Yes there are a lot of people on it in the deep south. That doesn't make it good or necessary.
>I've found a big reason why conservative states tend to be more racist
Exposure to other races
>To the more liberal states, there is no visible difference between a black man and a white man from a conservative state. They're all meth heads
Stop watching hollywood
>the south doesn't need welfare
Prove it. Generate a positive tax return.
That presuposes the spending is needed. It isn't.
Prove it. Thus far, we only have information that you people cannot sustain yourselves.
Humanity lived for a million years before contemporary US welfare.
And yet, the south is not able to manage even -with- welfare.
What the frick is that even supposed to mean?
They seem consistently unable to handle their own problems to the point of being unable to rebuild even basic self sufficiency or economic competitiveness even with massive, massive spending.
Individual states haven’t been self sufficient in over a century
hence
>or economic competitiveness
And how many midwestern states are competitive, with out massive agricultural subsidization?
not many. The nation is essentially carried by california, texas, and new york.
>They seem
Well they're not. You're just a stupid homosexual grasping for staws as to how it could be a good thing for californian morons to spend their tech profits on federal welfare that the south doesn't want and then complain they don't pay enough into it when nobody fricking asked for it.
>We don't need the welfare! We don't!
>No, we don't intend to ever become successful enough to pay into federal funds, we are content to suckle on the government teat for all time
Why are you people such hypocritical welfare queens?
You keep saying you didn't ask for these things, then applying for them.
>we are content to suckle on the government teat for all time
What part of "the south did not vote for this and does not want this" is so hard for you to understand?
>You keep saying you didn't ask for these things, then applying for them.
Protip, dumbass, populations, especially of the states in question, are far from homogenous! On average, it's not the conservative whites you hate eating those taxes.
>What part of "the south did not vote for this and does not want this" is so hard for you to understand?
You keep applying for it.
>We're not homogenous, stop blaming us for the way we behave
>coming from a conservative
big lol
>You keep applying for it.
No, Black folk do. If you want to stop funding it, we agree.
>it's not our fault, we just keep doing it
>Can't you tell that it's the other group of us, and not me, doing it?
No, not really, you guys are near indistinguishable.
It's not just welfare spending. All the technology, finance, and culture that makes America relevant on a global stage happens on the coasts. Endless fields of corn with no buyers would not be a global superpower.
The world would be better off without the spread of American (actually just californian) culture. The world is also not improved by tech giants pouring countless billions of dollars of venture capital into ever increasingly dystopian methods to pick and serve advertisements.
No one asked you to samegay, Demoshit.
Your talking points have also been obsolete for over a decade.
>no one asked
you guys literally asked
why are you always lying?
Violent gangs high on lots of money.
A healthy hate for minorities and criminal elements.
Having to deal with Californians all day, every day will take a toll on even the best of us
Imagine being California's babysitter 24/7, and their parents think their kids are perfect little angels who can do no wrong.
I'd be shooting everything that moves if I had to be a fricking cop in LA too, fricking wasteland. Might as well be Judge Dredd without a frickin Lawgiver, frick that shit.
a meme built on a strawman
This kek. At least rightwinger strawmen memes can be funny. Leftwinger memes just feel like they're lecturing you
maybe you should fricking learn
Why would I learn from some memeing moron.
Why would someone publicly wear a shirt that says "I believe police should have the right to lie?"
The... shirt just as a flag with a blue stripe on it...
I think you're just seeing what you want to see.
>0 ranks in politics
not him but "thin blue line" is also a term used for cops closing ranks around bad cops and lying on reports and such to prevent civilians from hearing about unlawful acts they commit. to cross the thin blue line is to snitch on your fellow police officers, and since it's usually about crimes they commit, follows the same philosophy actual criminals have, in that snitches get stitches
forgot to finish typing before posting, but basically the blue line on american flag apparel means supporting law enforcement. a green one means supporting military. so him pointing out the blue line on the shirt means the guy wearing it is tacitly supporting corrupt police officers. sort of like that stupid acab shit blm joggers are always going on about
I order them to kneel for BLM
That's okay, our cleric cast Protection from Law, Communal earlier.
I rush the cop. Party says I was a good, religious boy at the inevitable court ruling, and just needed mo money fo dem pograms. A mysterious NPC named Jaffa keeps surfacing. The cop gets 9001 years in prison and I reroll.
The only way to be truly safe from being killed by cops is to shoot up a school. Makes them wait on you and escort you off the premises once you're done as you have clearly demonstrated that you're the top cop in the vincinity.
He looks like Aaron Eckhart.
>The virgin "Nooooo he was a criminal it was justified!"
>The Chad "It was police brutality and that's based"
Police Cop.
Luckily my party only plays as light skinned men and elves.
I ask him if I'm being detained
What a respectable man, I'm sure we can work together
Holy shit a talking duck
My group pulls out their Blue Lives Matter flags and gently licks his boots to a fine polish. Our Drow is almost detained, but we tell the cop "He's one of the good ones" and tip the cop 21% for his service. We proceed to leave Bellaire with our child brides safely hidden in our bags of holding.
But is he a cop or a time cop?
>shoves the samurai to the front
>get the investigator/alchemist to stand behind us and not draw attention to
>tell the Oracle to frick off to another area so his incredibly caustic attitude and propensity for insults doesn't get us put in prison again
>still probably wind up in lockup because the samurai admitted to a series of murders and B&E we technically did commit, but without the context surrounding the events
Last time this happened me and the Oracle promised to leave no stone stacked upon another in the Helllknight citadel we found ourselves locked up in getting tortured to admit guilt for killing people
"Sorry officer I was just playing League of Legends-"
Do a 360 and sneak away.
You get that thing I sent ya?
>cop sees a 9-feet tall giantkin and literally shits himself
Awesome
I'm sure that the GM wouldn't force their petty politics into the game and the officer in question is here to help.
Sidenote:Stryker in MK9 was so awesome.
Stryker was always awesome. Bunch of people with superpowers, evil wizards, cyborgs and literal gods, and then there's this random cop badass enough to fight then with normal weapons.
Same can kinda be said about Sonia but she's using bleeding edge secret government weapons. Stryker has a pistol and some grenades.
Motherfricker is Punisher beating the shit out of Thanos.
My paladin smiles, walks up to him, looks him in the eye, says "thank you, officer, keep up the great work!" & firmly shakes his hand. Always happy to meet another good guy who puts his life on the line to make the world a better place.
>Put on my cool face.
Problem, officer?
Perfect world
>Ask how he's doing
>Help and assist where needed
Imperfect world
>"GET ON YOUR KNEES"
>"CRAWL TOWARDS ME"
>"LEFT HAND RED, RIGHT FOOT BLUE"
>*BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG*
caligaygians bragging about how awesome their shithole of a state supposedly is because they have lots of money
People wouldn't be fleeing CA in droves if California wasn't a terrible place to live.
Oh, I'm not from california.
Hence why I specify texas, new york, and california.
It's just the thought of being reliant on californians really twists the nipples of you people, and you're always so insufferable, it's nice to give some back.
I'm a paladin, so I smite the zogbot.
>Sorry for the inconvenience officer, but this is a revolution.
AM I BEING DETAINED?
The first centrally organised and uniformed police force was created by the government of King Louis XIV in 1667 to police the city of Paris, then the largest city in Europe.
Nice little fact.
POLICE BRUTALITY COMIN RIGHT UP
We probably assume he's lost because there isn't a settlement within the territory that's large enough to necessitate a law enforcement organization and current circumstances mean one couldn't meaningfully project force here even if they wanted to.
With any luck we might be able to help each other figure out what the hell is going on but he's probably better off finding a place to stay at the main settlement if he's a baseline human.
Don't know what a cop is, is it a nightwatchman?