>players get floorplans of the heist location
>security includes electrified fence
>party face goes to case the joint
>leans on fence to chat up the security guard
 It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
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It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
Your players' brightest moments
Brilliant!
>security guards rush Face inside to give Face medical attention
>Face is now on the inside...
That WOULD be really smart, but he was already on the inside, since he had fake ID that got him through the front door. He was literally just chatting up guards.
In hindsight, it did give him an opportunity to ask the guards "what other dangers should I know about" as a joke, but they told him, so he got the info nonetheless.
Mistakes into miracles.
And 15 years later, the two still fondly tell their children the story of how they met.
He did get the guard's name, and made a point to schedule the heist at the same time of day in hopes that he'd see the guard again...
But.. they are the same sex! T-that[s forbidden l-love(and really homosexualty if they are male)
>Players are closing in on the head of a cult worshiping a murder god
>they corner the 2ic in his private box at the local gladiatorial pit he owns
>cult fanatics step out from behind the tasteful curtains to surround the party
>one of the PCs immediately sets the curtains on fire
>the building was also previously established to be an old shitty converted warehouse, and the cult fighters have several times shown a weird zeal that imminent death does not dampen.
>beyond the frontier, deep in unknown lands
>party finds an obelisk glowing and crackling with arcane energies
>a bird lands on it and is instantly annihilated
>wizard: "I touch it with my staff!"
Apparently he thought the energy would go into his staff and turn it into a powerful magic item, because ???
I mean, he was right, just for an extremely short amount of time.
>players are about to infiltrate a city belonging to hostile kingdom
>obviously they can't tell that they're on a quest from the neighboring kingdom
>at the gates guard ask who the people in the party are and where are they coming from
>cleric immeadietly says that they're on a quest from a neighboring kingdom
>encounter group of enemies at a bridge, led by an ice troll
>troll offers to duel our strongest warrior one on one, if he wins we can pass
>fighter goes to fight him one on one
>he's doing pretty well, looks like our guy has got this in the bag
>moron wizard: "I cast grease on the troll's axe!"
>players are in a room with a mob boss and a dozen of his goons
>one player pulls out a stick of C4
>forgets it takes an action to prime it
>everyone bails out of the room by the time is explodes
>players get beaten down and taken prisoner by the mob
>forgets it takes an action to prime it
I'd be pretty upset if a logical series of events was interrupted because I forgot a game rule, especially if "tap a button on the object in your hand" takes the same amount of time to perform as "flee the room".
Kind of illustrates how silly turn-based combat can be, since supposedly everything that happens in a round is happening at the same time.
I guess it depends on the system, but I'm guessing that by "action" it implies that priming the C4 takes a full round, as opposed to a "quick/simple/bonus action" like tapping a button.
He personally sought out c4 specifically the session prior, it specifically states it requires a mechanics check to arm it. We all had a good laugh about it, I’m glad I don’t run games for playoids like you that expect to be coddled for being moronic
you mean you're glad your players coddle you when you're moronic 🙂
>playoids
Don't you mean narrativistpunks?
C4 is shelf stable, and requires a very specific type of detonator to initiate the reaction. From retrieving both items from your bags to having an explosive charge ready to detonanate, takes a few seconds. Anon's game probably reflects this.
Yeah this is more realistic, and if the character had skill points in mechanics/demolitions, they would have known that. But I'm not the type of DM to stop my players' stupid decisions.
RAW: Requires an action to arm
Reality: Requires an action to arm
Sounds like a round to me. While I do generally think that GMs should cut players slack when it comes to whether or not their character thought of it, I do think that at a certain point you can't do that. "I would have armed the explosive ahead of time if I knew I was going into combat." is not normal behaviour.
I agree, you don't get to use present knowledge to decide the pasts' actions.
Arming the explosive ahead of time is less the objection and more that surely this bomb man, who I assume knows things about how to use bombs and has done so before in combat, can be reasonably assumed to remember he needs to arm explosives before he uses them. Forgetting to tell the GM he made sure to arm it is just that, forgetting OOC, not making a poor decision IC.
I gave him a chance to back out but he stuck with it, but you sound like an absolute moron.
>DM I want to piss on the king
>Ok the king calls his guards to arrest you
>WHAT NOOOOOOOOOO MY CHARACTER SHOULDVE KNOWN THAT WOULD HAPPEN WHAT THE FRICK
This is why it’s important to filter players
>You expect your character to act competently within their realms of expertise?
>Lmao, that's gay, by the way you forgot to mention your character shitting recently so they've got a ruptured bowl from terminal constipation, git rekt pleb, I am winner
Pulling the old 'You didn't explicitly mention your character bringing their sword, in that case you left it behind in boot camp even though your character would have to be an abhuman to do that' doesn't give you a bigger penis anon.
It just makes you a massive wiener. And there is a difference.
>GM PLAY THE GAME FOR ME IM TOO moronic IM A LITTLE BABY WIPE MY ASS PLEASE
I stopped feeding him after the first reply. You should try it.
You are a fricking moron. You don't just walk around carrying armed explosives at all times. The discussion became a fight, and he didn't state that he took the time before then to arm the explosives, so they aren't armed. Why would they have been?
i don't know man, this sounds like you assume someone just falls over if they tell you they go somewhere instead of walk somewhere
More like
>Player: I attack the troll
>DM(You)((homosexual)): Hurr derp you forgot to mention taking a piss before you entered the dungeon! Your bladder bursts and you die.
I do generally agree with this, but in this situation I would simply remind the player of the rule. Your C4 is not armed so you can't blow us all to bits, but you can get a mulligan and do something else instead, because clearly your character would have known that, even if you forgot. But let him arm the C4 ahead of time? No, no way. Because while
here might be crudely put, the point remains. As a GM if you end up giving the players backsies and constant retcons of what happened, you are both taking away their agency, in allowing bad things to happen to the unprepared, and also teaching them that they do not need to pay attention or think things through.
Today it's "I would have armed the C4" ahead of time, tomorrow it's "I would have known that I couldn't outdraw someone aiming at my head.", and next week it's "My character would have known to consult an expert hacker before going on this 3-day incursion into hostile territory to steal their computer core." Either the players are playing or the GM is playing, and you want it to be the former if you enjoy RPGs. Does it suck when you forgot to bring that great piece of gear that would be really useful right now? Yes, it's real shitty. But will you fricking remember next time that you can't just declare you brought a bazooka through customs? Yes you will. This leads to roleplay opportunities, and players who think creatively and critically of the game world.
Some people b***h about how fudging renders all dice rolls meaningless, whatever you think about that: consider that taking away a player's agency to make bad decisions or to forget makes it less of a roleplaying game. Without agency it is just quirky repetitive algebra with some bint telling you a story while you're doing it. There are games like that available, and they can be fun, but they are not roleplaying games.
I'm not sure I understand how the slippery slope can happen if you're literally the final and ultimate arbiter of this. If you think a particular example is too far, you can just say no.
The slippery slope happens when the player, having not been made responsible for their own inaction, expects there to be a continuous stream of concessions when they think of something which would be in their favour but they hadn't thought of ahead of time. The point that is too far was already arming the C4.
Arming C4 if you intend to use it, makes sense. Having armed C4 in your bag "just in case" is absolutely insane. That's like pulling the pin on a grenade and walking around with the handle pressed down "just in case you need to throw it". Allow the character to have precognition about the need to use it and you legitimise precognition, allow the character to retcon what their preparations were and you legitimise not having to prepare.
Yes, you are the final arbiter, which is why you should put your foot down at this point, not several instances down the line when players have already got into a rhythm of not thinking things through. Your character might have remembered to reload, or bought the right detonator, or packed the explosives in the first place, but your character did not make a counter-intuitive decision ahead of time just because it was advantageous to have done so. The player that thinks ahead and puts effort into preparing is going to stop doing that when the player who is bumbling around gets all the same benefits for none of the effort. It hurts the overall quality of the game.
NTA, but it feels like you're intentionally missing the point.
Nobody said the GM should have let the player retroactively have primed C4. What the GM should have done was say "hey player, C4 isn't explosive until it's primed, and your character would know that. Did you want to change your action before we resolve it?"
He did.
>I gave him a chance to back out but he stuck with it
I dunno, based on the rest of his posts, I have doubts this was a real chance or reminder or anything and was probably just a "are you sure?" with no clarification
I AM that anon and this is indeed exactly what I was saying, but I think we've reached entrenchment on this
>Nobody said the GM should have let the player retroactively have primed C4
>What the GM should have done was
>"Your C4 is not armed so you can't blow us all to bits, but you can get a mulligan and do something else instead"
The reason you feel that I'm intentionally not getting it is because you don't care what about people have to say, so you're not paying attention to what they're telling you.
I dont think most people in this argument are 100% on the same page about the specifics of the series of events and what exactly people mean by their proposed solutions, and I dont think it's going to get any better without actually examining the event itself first hand. Which isn't really possible, nor do I want to bother.
Whatever lets you sleep at night.
Why do some people get so defensive when the idea of an argument becoming miscommunicated or not understood is raised? I'm not calling you stupid, nor even saying you're wrong. Is it just others not agreeing with you?
Some people really really give a frick, apparently
>DMing Fallout 2d20 game
>homebrew setting so it takes place some years after NV in Texas/El Paso region
>Almost end of session
>players need to fix a broken Corvega truck to escape some Aztlan troops
>the result will determine where the next session will start
>Hey anon, can I do another roll for repair? Charisma and repair actually
>Why?
>I have some blackberrys and I thought we could use it to paint some flames on the truck, you know, " Hot Rod"
>Hummm... Okay but... May I know why?
>Come on, anon, even you must know that painting flames on something makes it faster
>Wh...W-what?!
>Yeah, everybody knows that, said another player, it's a scientific fact
>look at my brother, he is faster than my nephew, said yet another player
>we look at the backyard
>his brother is, indeed, faster than the other kid
>his shoes are some Lighting McQueen mexican bootleg crocs, they have little flames on the sides
>yeah but your nephew is a fat a...
>can we paint the truck or not?
>I agree
>he buys more dices with momentum
>okay guys lets get out of here
>rolls 4 dices for a total of 3 crits which means 6 success
>they all shout and celebrate
>wait! Anon, where's your Bluetooth speaker?!
?si=vwBohRuJk17Iw36E
>They basically earn a full day of advantage over them troops at top speed
>me, picrel
the least they could've done is played Kickstart My Heart
I know greentexts are fake, but i wish i got to play with Orks.
No wonder /tg/ has gone so downhill, it’s mostly a playoid board now. There’s no more stories because playoids don’t think about games outside the game, they view it similar to Netflix. There’s no more homebrew because playoids don’t even read the rules to begin with. There’s no more interesting discussion because playoids’ eyes glaze over whenever they have to read.
I imagine that’s why 99% of discussion is “lore”. Because a youtuber can fill a playoid’s head with “lore” and then playoids argue, using arguments read on X or Reddit, about which “lore” is the best.
>Mind flayers holding a hostage demand for party to come with them and face justice for disturbing their raid on a ship
>they warn not one step closer or they will force us into submission
>monk: "Luckily for you, I don't need steps."
>the two held mind blasts go off as he tries to teleport over and 3/4 of the party is insta stunned
It was a tense night after that but its been so long, it was honestly just kinda hilarious
>party relatively low level
>majority of party wants to go deal with zombie invasion of city by killing the necromancer directly and end his magic
>minority of party wants to go attempt to convince a local dragon to just wipe out the invasion with breath attacks
>Tell them its a bad idea, both groups A and B split off anyways
>several hundred gold, magical items, and solid rolls later, group B succeeds and dragon agrees and flies off
>group A meanwhile is engaged with necromancer/horde
>dragon doesn't give a shit, unleashes breath attack, kills literally everything
>group A wiped out
>group B sees this from a cliff with a spyglass
>group B: "So we're just splitting the reward two ways, and not six anymore right?"
>THAT DRAGON IS HEADED TOWARDS THE NECROMANCER'S CURRENT POSITION
>WHERE'S THE NECROMANCER MANSLEY?
>"So we're just splitting the reward two ways, and not six anymore right?"
Unironically based
What the frick else do you really say at that point, honestly?
I'm laughing my ass off, that's incredible.
>group B remembering the most powerful option in any system is the Enormous Bag Of Gold.
>"So we're just splitting the reward two ways, and not six anymore right?"
Fricking geniuses, 10/10, would laugh with again.
>players are deep in a cave filled with orcs
>have magic item from forest spirit that leads them to source of corruption
>as they explore the cave, they come across an altar with magic runes on the floor leading to a different room
>room is filled with dead bodies and debris, all drained of blood and broken to dust respectively
>they place the magic item on the altar and activate the runes
>the item begins glowing red and shaking
>players describe themselves watching with curiosity
>after a while, the device and runes drain the magic item on the altar, shattering it and its power
>I have to pause the game and quickly level up as the bbeg as a portion of the nature spirit’s power is drained into him
The worst part is, they managed to sneak through and avoid all his guards and summoned minions and killed him for extra XP since he was stronger
>MFW after killing the boss they stumble deeper into the cave and almost die to his 10 hounds that he didn’t get to call during the fight
This is a very minor one, but I appreciate how sharp the player was. It was a Weaver Dice game, and the PCs are a two-man superhero team. They're footsloggers, and competing with a rival team for credit.
They get a report about a brawl inside a shopping mall, and hear that it's on Level 6. Their rival (who can fly) is there, and obviously eavesdropping.
One PC immediately shouts "They're on Level 12! Let's go, people!" and the other superhero immediately zooms to the wrong floor.
Like I said, it's a minor thing but a funny one.
>car chase
>one of the players wakes up
>he was kidnapped and is in the car being chased
>the idea is to make a tense situation, shootout and potentially epic car to car jumping while they take out the baddies
>they shoot the driver
>car barrels into a wall
>with a player still in it
>one of the baddies takes the wheel and manages to steer away last second, doing a half u turn/drift by rolling a crit success
>they fricking do it again
>full frontal collision, as they go straight at the driverless car
>by blind luck, the player falls off trying to get in the back seat from the truck just before
>enemies get executed after asking for mercy
>everyone seriously wounded with lingering injuries, car heavily damaged and no leads.
>enemies never landed a single shot or caused damage deliberately in any way
Being an expert in C4 doesn't mean your character always remembers everything and is immune to making mistakes. It means that they should always be able to check the rules or ask the DM and get an answer. If you choose not to do so and do something stupid, it's on you for not double-checking.
>Rogue Trader
>One character is a homebrewed Tau fire caste
>Want his very own exo-armor, but is away from the Tau empire
>Hear some local old weirdo in the pirate space station might have one, and somehow managed to learn enough about Tau tech to make work somewhat
>Party raid his workshop
>Tau player shoot the unarmed old man in the face
>Realize his suit is useless, because he executed the only person with proper skills and knowledge to keep it functionnal
>Oops
>Party has a fight with a reoccurring vampire villain, beats him, and chases his mistform to his lair.
>Party previously found blob of magical holy sun metal that can only be shaped by pure evil. Said sun-metal glows extremely brightly.
>Party finds vampire's coffin in the back of his lair, in a small hidden room. Opening it up, the vampire is incapacitated and slowly regenerating inside. Per rules, said vamp can only be permakilled easily while inside this coffin.
>Party BSF (Big Stupid Fighter) has a bright idea, and pulls out the sunmetal, intending to barter the villain's life for smithing services. He holds it up to the vampire to show it to them.
>Brilliant magical sunlight glow immediately sets the 1 HP vampire on fire, permakilling him instantly.
>"Oh."
It's for the best
That's REALLY funny though.
>Hunter: The Vigil game set in the 1930s
>Party are investigating some kind of body-snatching wizard cult
>Said cult has been taking people and turning them into near-copies of its founder
>One party member, played by a particularly edgy dude, is searching a municipal works building taken over by the cult
>Alone
>Finds some old photographs of the workers
>They're black
>The workers (changed by the cult) approach him to ask what he's doing in their stuff
>He says he's going to intimidate them
>"Let me go or I'll tell everyone that you used to be Black folk"
I really don't understand how he thought that would lead to anything good
I mean that seems pretty in-character
I mean, it made me laugh my ass off, any it's a very funny way to get your character killed, but I don't think evil body thieves in Yog-Sothery care too much about that kind of thing.
Kek
Even if the character died, it would be worth it to deliver that line.
The party managed to trap a dwarf stone cleric in her own cage to suffocate to death in it. Pretty gruesome in simple
>players ask for an investigation mission instead of the usual hack and slash
>give them a missing person to investigate
>they head to last known location and just sit about expecting to be handed the plot
>have an NPC strike up a conversation to make the first step
>they respond with non-committal, closed answers
>decide to walk from place to place asking for perception checks to see if they "spot anything suspicious"
>tell them the need to be a bit more active in their investigating
>player asks the nearest NPC if they know the missing person, NPC is like "who?"
>party as a whole can't remember anything about the missing person's name other than their race
>not even a hastily scrawled note of their name
>bumble around a little bit more before I have an NPC come to them implying he knows what's going on
>rest of the mission turns into a hack and slash
>later ask the players what they wanted from an investigation mission
>idk
>...
Not one of my players but I'm a game I played.
>Hostage situation
>Player tries to take a risky shot at a hostage taker using a hostage as cover
>Fails, shooting the hostage
>Loudly shouts "Stop or I'll shoot another hostage!"
>Successfully confuses hostage takers enough for the rest of the party to get the jump on them.
Who gives a frick if anon was an butthole if the table had a fun time with it. Some tables love an butthole GM. Some don't. Play for your table.
>Players are at the top of a large hill and need to break into an armory at the bottom of said hill
>Describe the building as basically a mini castle with large, thick stone walls around it.
>They decide the best course of action would be to get into their shitty wooden wagon and ram it into the stone wall at max speed to "break through it dramatically"
>I rule the wagon slams into the wall, does no damage to it, and everyone riding in the wagon takes damage.
>Every single person in the cart gets knocked out except for the rogue that managed to jump and tumble at the last second, scurries up a nearby roof.
>Rogue and one player who refused to go along with the plan watch as the rest of the party is rounded up and captured
>mission is to steal identities to infiltrate a wizard's tower
>one player murders a wizard and succesfully steals his identity
>my character manages to intimidate the wizards to leave and lay low
>later the same wizards was charged with treason due to my character's actions with his stolen identity
>third player sets up a elaborate and very visible staged suicide of the wizard
>succeeds in elaborate plan
>now everyone believes and knows that the wizard had committed suicide
>stolen identity is worthless
>Rogue and one player who refused to go along with the plan watch as the rest of the party is rounded up and captured
kek, I should try playing with random people for events like this. My group has usually so story focused games dumb stuff like that doens't happen. As in characters dying or getting imprisoned, since that usually would throw the campaign off the rails.
>player arrives late
>the others are in the middle of combat
>figure I'll just put him in the end of the initiative list and he can have his t-
>"I roll to leap from the trees and fire my crossbow"
>you don't have to roll I'm just gon-
>clackclackclack
>rolled 1
>explain in elaborate detail how he had the jump on everyone present, but then tripped on his way down to the fray
>managed to at least knock over an enemy fighter and a player on his trip
Start a war against a minor elven polity. I told them the entire dwarven army is no match against the rifle, a quintessentially elven invention.