How do they shit

How do they shit

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    In their armor, they have a waste reprocessing system built into it. Not that they need to shit every day, since they only need a little morsel of food to sustain themselves for weeks on end anyway.

    I hope this will be the only reply in this thread and we can let it fall off page 10 peacefully.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      under normal circumstances? on the toilet like everyone else
      presumably a reinforced toilet designed to handle a giant

      in the field while in their armor?
      well that shouldnt be a worry since they have received bio-augmentations that reduce the need to use the bathroom in the first place, along with a reduced need to sleep or rest
      but if a fight does go long enough to need to take a dump, they can do it in the suit which is designed to recycle their waste and not require you to take off a ton of armor just to use the can

      But how do they wipe?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        They got paper glued to their armor.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        They wipe out their enemies.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous
      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >In their armor, they have a waste reprocessing system built into it
        a diaper?

        It's not a diaper, its a shitpipe lodged firmly up their rectums that sucks the shit right out of them and reprocesses it into field rations. This has all been established since RT, damn lorelet tourists.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >reprocesses it into field rations
          So space marines literally eat shit?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            It's the secret to that gorilla-like physique.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >he doesn't know
            Imperial Fists have multiple rituals around eating literal shit, anon. It's some of the oldest Space Marine lore

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >a shitpipe lodged firmly up their rectums that sucks the shit right out of them and reprocesses it into field rations.

          I went to that club in Germany too

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            It was in Britain and they called it The Rock

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        They just push, it's that simple.

        The tube goes right up there. No staining of the anus occurs.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        They don't need to. Primaris shit solid gold pellets which the Champions use to bling up their armour.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        They have built-in bidets. It's an otherwise lost technology.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          You got it backwards, marines used the shit pipe method until Cawl (re)invented bidets

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Thanks to the little known twentieth gene-seed implant "Equus Anus" they don't have to wipe.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Auto-bidet built into the ass plate

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        One of the space marine implants is actually a self-cleaning sphincter like horses have.
        See

        Thanks to the little known twentieth gene-seed implant "Equus Anus" they don't have to wipe.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >In their armor, they have a waste reprocessing system built into it
      a diaper?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        oh frick off, we're not starting the diaper marine conspiracy again

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Again?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          the what

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >waste reprocessing
        >diaper
        Tell us you had a fricked up childhood without saying you had a fricked up childhood.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Do they have pipes shoved up their ass then to extract such waste?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Unironically yes.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Half the people in this setting are walking around with various tubes jammed in their mouth, nose or skull. Is it really so surprising to learn they have a tube up their ass too?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      [...]
      It's not a diaper, its a shitpipe lodged firmly up their rectums that sucks the shit right out of them and reprocesses it into field rations. This has all been established since RT, damn lorelet tourists.

      But do Sisters of Battle have it as well?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        It's probably a feature in all armor. Marine, Sister, Inquisitor, stormtroopers. Hell probably in Chaos armor as well.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Hell probably in Chaos armor as well.
          *plague marine crying because he physically cannot shit himself*

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            What do you think the plague marine random pipes are?

            >reprocesses it into field rations
            So space marines literally eat shit?

            Did you think the Imperium does otherwise? That they recycle corpses, but nothing else?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        this man's asking questions I never thought I needed answers to

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Sisters have the opposite, their buttholes get stitched up

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Sisters are so pure they don't poop.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        You're telling me every power armour has a poopchute that goes directly up the users bumhole?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >they only need a little morsel of food to sustain themselves for weeks on
      how though? metabolically, thermodynamically it makes no sense

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I think their combat rations are made to be so efficient there's no need to take a dump as their body absorbs 100% of it.
      Picrel inspired a 'debate' about how you would even get Gravis armour off to take a dump. Aggressors in particular are up shit creek.

      This culminated in one 'debater' erupting into the 'take a dump' song to the tune of "Wake me up inside".

      Around the "CAN'T TAKE DUMP" verse we decided this was now the theme of Aggressors.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Nutrient Recycling: Filters in the armour capture and purify body waste, re-constituting it into a nutrient solution that is intravenously returned to the body. This can sustain a Battle-Brother for long periods of time, but not indefinitely.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          That makes them seem a bit less badass, not sure where I got the combat rations idea from.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Probably a wiki.

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    under normal circumstances? on the toilet like everyone else
    presumably a reinforced toilet designed to handle a giant

    in the field while in their armor?
    well that shouldnt be a worry since they have received bio-augmentations that reduce the need to use the bathroom in the first place, along with a reduced need to sleep or rest
    but if a fight does go long enough to need to take a dump, they can do it in the suit which is designed to recycle their waste and not require you to take off a ton of armor just to use the can

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    however they do it, it's grimdark

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    They shit their power pants.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Maybe ask the general?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >General, how do the Astartes shit, Sir?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >solider, what did I say about eating dead orks?

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    With great precision and efficiency.

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    anal catheters.

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    how do they shit?

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Nice thread
    Got me some good chuckles outta me Scatological humor is actually good sometimes and whoever disagrees can suck my fat chode

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >a whole convent of battle sisters holding in their shit in the night leading up to a battle, so come dawn they call all drop turds the size of premature infants and go into the fray with clear minds and empty bowels
    Alright I guess I wasn't not going to goon

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      A battle sister crash lands on a planet in an escape pod, and after weeks of wandering the planet's vast deserts encounters a single space marine that has been wandering for months. They're both at their limits with nutrient recycling pushed far beyond normal. The delirious marine points his bolter at the sister, and says, "Open your armour, do a shit, and I won't kill you here and now."
      The sister follows directions before catching the marine off guard. She returns the gesture, pointing her bolter at the marine before saying, "Open your armour, do a shit, and I won't kill you here and now."
      Then they had lunch together.

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    There's probably an ostomy bag somewhere in the armor that collects it.

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Uh dude pretty sure they had a civil war over this
    >imperial loyalists wanted to hold it in forever
    >chaos traitors wanted to be able to go in any context, on the street, in a restaurant or theatre
    >the rest of humanity got dragged along with one of these two unreasonable positions

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