Removed the Based Vizier who will protect the King at all cost for the Mary Sue Queen who is a strong independant womyn who needs no man. Shit game
What a surprise, the only female character is a mary sue. The most overpowered unit in the whole game, you can go any direction, any distance, whatever you want
God i hate women
>wokeshit
Garbage game.
Why else would they make the queen have the abilities of the rook AND the bishop instead of the king? Does that make any sense to you?
>memorization: the game
some chess players claim that only the openings are memorized and after that it comes to skill, but this is bullshit. it's a fun game to play with friends when you're bored but only autists take it seriously and play it at a competitve level.
the game is very unbalanced its turn-based so whoever has the first move has the advantage the game has been out for over 20 years now and they still haven't fixed this what the frick Nintendo the game is too complicated there are all these weird stupid strategies and all sorts of gay shit you have to learn in order to be good at it the graphics are terrible apparently this is a bishop see the resemblance oh and this know what this is a horse right no no that's a knight I thought a knight was the guy wearing armor on top of the horse but no no the horse itself is a high-ranking member of the feudal system oh and I guess castles move as well what kind of wacky tabacky were they smoking when they came up with this shit oh and what a surprise the only female character the queen is a fricking Mary Sue the most overpowered unit in the whole game you can move in any direction any distance whatever you want god I hate women I like retro games don't get me wrong but this is just awful magnus carlsen play League of Legends you scrub you're wasting your time with this game inadvertent commas chess more like chess chess jizz chess more like shit
It basically has the same problem as fighting games with how you can't just play to get better after a certain point.
Also you stop being able to play with friends once you put some effort into the game.
Even with its flaws the games ends up being way more varied and exciting compared to what you get with TCGs, so it's still clearly a 10/10.
why can't my homosexual brothers and sisters be promoted in this famous passtime?
i should be able to play with two kings or two queens, this is discrimination
My brother's first encounter with the absolute purity of 'arbitrary' ecompassed by the en passant rule so completely broke his mind that he had to be institutionalized; it is now forbidden to mention chess in our household.
i hate this meme. at the very top level of competition you need to know the common lines, sure... but for the average player tactics and pattern recognition wins you most of your games
Ok so execution and mechanics don't exist right? not to mention the spice of life, the dreaded RNG
2 years ago
Anonymous
>Ok so execution and mechanics don't exist right?
How does someone learn execution and game mechanics? You end up memorizing it.
2 years ago
Anonymous
it's a different kind of memorization, execution can be impressive, learning 30 moves is not
2 years ago
Anonymous
Chess960 solves this. Fischer was right about memorization killing chess. He was also right about the israelites.
2 years ago
Anonymous
And a reminder that top GMs want to play Fischer random cause even for them learning so much theory is taxing. But man we can't let those poor Indian children who wasted all their childhood learning a game die for hunger lol lmao
2 years ago
Anonymous
Watching magnus play blitz 960 is like porn. It’s beautiful.
2 years ago
Anonymous
Good thing RNG doesn't exist in chess, and is much better for it
Pattern recognition is that hnagging feeling that israelites are behind all the eco omic problems we're reeling with
Memorization is knowing which israelites own and operate each major corporation and where they live and what their kids private school schedule schedule is.
You can only memorize up to a blunder. Each blunder is unique and you have to freestyle the rest of the game.
Not to mention there's sixty gorillion permutations from each opening of chess. It's impossible to memorize much more than a dozen or so moves of the 3 best lines.
Chess is much more about pattern recognition than memorization. Memorization just lets you bypass figuring things out, but you can just calculate instead and calculating is the actual skill you need to win anyway
Literally no reason to play a solved 500 year old board game when video games exist. The only people who play this are the profoundly autistic, grifting twitch streamers looking for a niche, or people who's government forces them to.
Chess is the game that all games should compare themselves to in order to see if they're good or not. Relatively few pieces, simple movement rules, an 8x8 grid, and yet somehow manages to completely mog basically every other game in terms of complexity and skill.
>wanted to show them israelites whos boss >by making a lot of money at the expense of their pockets >ends up making them even more money >gets kicked out by FIDE and the U.S.A. government when he decided to have a friendly match with a russian
What a surprise, the only female character is a mary sue. The most overpowered unit in the whole game, you can go any direction, any distance, whatever you want
God i hate women
>wokeshit
Garbage game.
Why else would they make the queen have the abilities of the rook AND the bishop instead of the king? Does that make any sense to you?
it's shit for the same reason fighting games are shit.
it's only somewhat fun as long as you and your opponent are on the exact same level.
otherwise, the win is pretty much guaranteed for the better player.
game is total bullshit it's turn based so of course whoever goes first wins instantly
no to mention those random moronic rules the devs pulled out of their ass like castling just so they can claim this shitty ass basic toddler game is actually super complex
I was the one who posted the link. Nice game anon, interesting ideas. I thought I blundered on the turn you long castled but computer thinks I was still fine.
I think it's moronic since the last time I played it with guy at uni who was supposed to be really good at it lost almost all his pieces but then told me he didn't lose but it was a "tie"
too bad the cuck didn't tell me that was a rule before I got into that position, he also did some asspull move mid-game where he switches two pieces together and apparently that was also legal
Castling has been a rule for hundreds of years, and Stalemate is a natural consequence of two rules put together: You can't deliberately put yourself into check, and you also can't pass your turn. How stalemates are judged has changed over the years, but for the english speaking world stalemating your opponent was a loss until the rules unified and decided it was a draw. Personally, I still think of you can't convert your advantage into a win and you frick up, you deserve to lose, but the draw will have to be motivation enough to get good.
personally I think making the other cuck not being able to move was not a draw since he couldnt fricking move and win
castling is fricking moronic asspull thing because game is badly designed - just make pieces move universally the same way instead of make additional shit up
If you can't win, you deserve to lose. (You) are the one that snatched defeat from the jaws of victory, and there's nothing to do but git good. Castling appeared in the rules because it improves king safety, generally leading to longer and more interesting games.
2 years ago
Anonymous
this is your last (You) so you better enjoy it,
making the opponent not being able to play is a fricking win, no matter what you dumb coping losers say. If he cannot move he physically cannot win any more therefore it's my fricking win
2 years ago
Anonymous
If you didn't checkmate your opponent, you didn't win. If you also wrecked the gamestate so badly that you froze the game, you don't deserve to continue. You got swindled (at best), or just fricked up (more likely) and you're coping, seething, and probably in the process of dilating as you refuse to acknowledge that you're not as good at the game as you thought.
2 years ago
Anonymous
I agree, it's a shit rule only used so you can avoid saying you lost and be a smug little shit about it. It's also avoidable by simply checking the king instead of trying to hinder his movement.
2 years ago
Anonymous
>making the opponent not being able to play is a fricking win
Anon a draw and stalemate isn't a win. Neither player wins, neither player loses. That's why on score cards there's a third column after W and L.
If it's black to move, it's a stalemate. You're stalemated whenever you have no legal moves, but to be stalemated in such a poisition is... unusual to say the least. It does lean into the basic idea behind stalemate traps though, where you deliberately sacrifice your only movable piece in a lost position, and if your opponent takes it, they stalemate and you salvage a draw out of a loss. Stalemate traps and similar swindles make the endgame more interesting, which is why I think the old english rule (stalemate = loss for the "attacker") would be an improvement.
No but they do have autism and extremely good memory. 99% of high-level chess is just memorizing thousands of plays and correct answers to them. That's why computers beat humans so easily in it: the biggest autist on the planet still doesn't have the emmeory capacity of a computer.
I've watched quite a lot of Hikaru Nakamura's YouTube content and he's around top level when it comes to chess.
It's downright impressive how dumb he is when it comes to grasping anything outside of chess.
If I met him in real life without knowing about his chess background I would guess that his IQ was in the low 90s.
Chess would be better if a draw is reached only if both kings died in the same turn. You check the king they can also check yours. Stalemate doesn't make sense.
Shit graphics
Take the buttplug out, then.
Too many bugs.
Queen is busted
removes any need for skill just memorize the openings
Too old >>>/vr/
Nerf bishop
too many cheaters
solved game that takes years to get into
>The Queen is a fricking Mary Sue who can go ANYWHERE she wants and beats every single class besides herself
God I hate women
1 joke
Post your vegana or stfu
Devs need to buff the pawn
>memorization: the game
some chess players claim that only the openings are memorized and after that it comes to skill, but this is bullshit. it's a fun game to play with friends when you're bored but only autists take it seriously and play it at a competitve level.
>fitz
Awesome but I'm too brainlet for it
Which Botez is superior?
right looks like a massive bawd, left looks slightly less hot but she's probably the pruder one of the two. I'll take left
Removed the Based Vizier who will protect the King at all cost for the Mary Sue Queen who is a strong independant womyn who needs no man. Shit game
I don't like the fact that you're pretty much forced to insert stuff in your butt if you want to compete.
Go back to work, Ray
YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD HIDE
FROM ME?
Bxe9
Intresting choice
Nxe9 would be much better as you'll be able to bring the knight after you push your center pawns.
Ruined by autistic minmaxers like everything else
the game is very unbalanced its turn-based so whoever has the first move has the advantage the game has been out for over 20 years now and they still haven't fixed this what the frick Nintendo the game is too complicated there are all these weird stupid strategies and all sorts of gay shit you have to learn in order to be good at it the graphics are terrible apparently this is a bishop see the resemblance oh and this know what this is a horse right no no that's a knight I thought a knight was the guy wearing armor on top of the horse but no no the horse itself is a high-ranking member of the feudal system oh and I guess castles move as well what kind of wacky tabacky were they smoking when they came up with this shit oh and what a surprise the only female character the queen is a fricking Mary Sue the most overpowered unit in the whole game you can move in any direction any distance whatever you want god I hate women I like retro games don't get me wrong but this is just awful magnus carlsen play League of Legends you scrub you're wasting your time with this game inadvertent commas chess more like chess chess jizz chess more like shit
>Battle Chess
I blame this game for establishing my taste in women
It basically has the same problem as fighting games with how you can't just play to get better after a certain point.
Also you stop being able to play with friends once you put some effort into the game.
Even with its flaws the games ends up being way more varied and exciting compared to what you get with TCGs, so it's still clearly a 10/10.
Too slow and boring. No excitement. No adrenaline.
I prefer esports. It makes my heart pump
look up bullet chess
Just play blitz.
try converting a winning position with less than 10 seconds on your clock and come back
why can't my homosexual brothers and sisters be promoted in this famous passtime?
i should be able to play with two kings or two queens, this is discrimination
I am not smart enough to think more tan 1 step ahead.
Maybe 2 at best.
My brother's first encounter with the absolute purity of 'arbitrary' ecompassed by the en passant rule so completely broke his mind that he had to be institutionalized; it is now forbidden to mention chess in our household.
Game is utterly autistic and just boils down to memorization.
i hate this meme. at the very top level of competition you need to know the common lines, sure... but for the average player tactics and pattern recognition wins you most of your games
>pattern recognition
So... memorization?
NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOU CANT SAY THAT
by that logic all learning is memorization and all video games are won by memorization
>by that logic all learning is memorization and all video games are won by memorization
Literally yes.
Ok so execution and mechanics don't exist right? not to mention the spice of life, the dreaded RNG
>Ok so execution and mechanics don't exist right?
How does someone learn execution and game mechanics? You end up memorizing it.
it's a different kind of memorization, execution can be impressive, learning 30 moves is not
Chess960 solves this. Fischer was right about memorization killing chess. He was also right about the israelites.
And a reminder that top GMs want to play Fischer random cause even for them learning so much theory is taxing. But man we can't let those poor Indian children who wasted all their childhood learning a game die for hunger lol lmao
Watching magnus play blitz 960 is like porn. It’s beautiful.
Good thing RNG doesn't exist in chess, and is much better for it
ok, so why is that a downside of chess specifically when it's true for just about all contests?
>all learning is memorization
Yes
if you wanna be reductionist to such an absurd degree... i guess
my argument is that the average player doesn't need to sit down and study lines to be successful at his level
Pattern recognition is that hnagging feeling that israelites are behind all the eco omic problems we're reeling with
Memorization is knowing which israelites own and operate each major corporation and where they live and what their kids private school schedule schedule is.
You can only memorize up to a blunder. Each blunder is unique and you have to freestyle the rest of the game.
Not to mention there's sixty gorillion permutations from each opening of chess. It's impossible to memorize much more than a dozen or so moves of the 3 best lines.
Chess is much more about pattern recognition than memorization. Memorization just lets you bypass figuring things out, but you can just calculate instead and calculating is the actual skill you need to win anyway
Isnt that every strategy game ever
>do anything except pawn to d4, pawn to e4, knight to c3, knight to f3
>lose the game
I hate the game devs, they really need to improve this shit.
Anal beads.
that'll be $100 million plus tip, thanks for posting
I hope for his defense niemann's lawyer tries and fails to push some beads into his ass to prove he couldn't have cheared.
>if the beads don’t fit, you must acquit.
I can cheat if I stick a vibrating anal bead up my ass.
White goes first so it's the best game.
I didn't like how unlike checkers, you couldn't do surprise attacks on your opponent, you had to always warn them when they are in check.
you don't have to announce checks in chess, it's just encouraged at low level play. In high level play it's considered rude.
sal sa?
turn based strategy games are obsolete, go play a AoE2 instead
everyone says i do be smart but i'm no good at checkers
I too love remote control vibrators.
Literally no reason to play a solved 500 year old board game when video games exist. The only people who play this are the profoundly autistic, grifting twitch streamers looking for a niche, or people who's government forces them to.
The only thing I know about chess is Cr1tikal vs. xQc, Botez sisters, and vibrating anal beads.
For me it's NothernLion
He had a buttplug.
The thinking man's game.
That's a lot of mating going on there.
Chess is the game that all games should compare themselves to in order to see if they're good or not. Relatively few pieces, simple movement rules, an 8x8 grid, and yet somehow manages to completely mog basically every other game in terms of complexity and skill.
>chess
its for IQ individuals only
>wanted to show them israelites whos boss
>by making a lot of money at the expense of their pockets
>ends up making them even more money
>gets kicked out by FIDE and the U.S.A. government when he decided to have a friendly match with a russian
Ah yes, really high IQ, good move Fischer.
shogi for casuals
I remember when you could play Chess in Halo Reach that shit was awesome
What a surprise, the only female character is a mary sue. The most overpowered unit in the whole game, you can go any direction, any distance, whatever you want
God i hate women
Besides he king all of the pieces are female
>bishop
>knight
>rook
>female
Hell the queen isn't even female. It was originally called the vizier.
>Chess was released for the Nintendo entertainment system in the early 1980s
Andrew Tate loves it so I love it, keep it alpha
>wokeshit
Garbage game.
Why else would they make the queen have the abilities of the rook AND the bishop instead of the king? Does that make any sense to you?
it's shit for the same reason fighting games are shit.
it's only somewhat fun as long as you and your opponent are on the exact same level.
otherwise, the win is pretty much guaranteed for the better player.
Inferior to Shogi
game is total bullshit it's turn based so of course whoever goes first wins instantly
no to mention those random moronic rules the devs pulled out of their ass like castling just so they can claim this shitty ass basic toddler game is actually super complex
me vs anon in chess
https://lichess.org/cyF13XXQ
first one to join is my opponent
I was the one who posted the link. Nice game anon, interesting ideas. I thought I blundered on the turn you long castled but computer thinks I was still fine.
troony pozzed goyslop walking simulator AAA indie garbage with shitty graphics
https://lichess.org/cyF13XXQ
this is the game I just played, did you mean to post a different link
>It's great, one of my favorite games to cheat at.
-Hans
Don't you have a tantrum to throw and a lawsuit to deal with Magnus?
>haha wouldn't it be funny if the pieces ate the other pieces whole
I think it's moronic since the last time I played it with guy at uni who was supposed to be really good at it lost almost all his pieces but then told me he didn't lose but it was a "tie"
Anon, if you were up two queens and Stalemated him you deserved to lose.
too bad the cuck didn't tell me that was a rule before I got into that position, he also did some asspull move mid-game where he switches two pieces together and apparently that was also legal
Anon you fricking cretin
You should have put your king on top of your castle and said you've entered your second form.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castling
Castling has been a rule for hundreds of years, and Stalemate is a natural consequence of two rules put together: You can't deliberately put yourself into check, and you also can't pass your turn. How stalemates are judged has changed over the years, but for the english speaking world stalemating your opponent was a loss until the rules unified and decided it was a draw. Personally, I still think of you can't convert your advantage into a win and you frick up, you deserve to lose, but the draw will have to be motivation enough to get good.
personally I think making the other cuck not being able to move was not a draw since he couldnt fricking move and win
castling is fricking moronic asspull thing because game is badly designed - just make pieces move universally the same way instead of make additional shit up
If you can't win, you deserve to lose. (You) are the one that snatched defeat from the jaws of victory, and there's nothing to do but git good. Castling appeared in the rules because it improves king safety, generally leading to longer and more interesting games.
this is your last (You) so you better enjoy it,
making the opponent not being able to play is a fricking win, no matter what you dumb coping losers say. If he cannot move he physically cannot win any more therefore it's my fricking win
If you didn't checkmate your opponent, you didn't win. If you also wrecked the gamestate so badly that you froze the game, you don't deserve to continue. You got swindled (at best), or just fricked up (more likely) and you're coping, seething, and probably in the process of dilating as you refuse to acknowledge that you're not as good at the game as you thought.
I agree, it's a shit rule only used so you can avoid saying you lost and be a smug little shit about it. It's also avoidable by simply checking the king instead of trying to hinder his movement.
>making the opponent not being able to play is a fricking win
Anon a draw and stalemate isn't a win. Neither player wins, neither player loses. That's why on score cards there's a third column after W and L.
Does Black have to still have moves that put his king in check for him to be stalemated? Ergo, something like this isn't a stalemate?
If it's black to move, it's a stalemate. You're stalemated whenever you have no legal moves, but to be stalemated in such a poisition is... unusual to say the least. It does lean into the basic idea behind stalemate traps though, where you deliberately sacrifice your only movable piece in a lost position, and if your opponent takes it, they stalemate and you salvage a draw out of a loss. Stalemate traps and similar swindles make the endgame more interesting, which is why I think the old english rule (stalemate = loss for the "attacker") would be an improvement.
Do GMs have very high IQ?
Not really, they just read the chess wikipedia article
No but they do have autism and extremely good memory. 99% of high-level chess is just memorizing thousands of plays and correct answers to them. That's why computers beat humans so easily in it: the biggest autist on the planet still doesn't have the emmeory capacity of a computer.
I've watched quite a lot of Hikaru Nakamura's YouTube content and he's around top level when it comes to chess.
It's downright impressive how dumb he is when it comes to grasping anything outside of chess.
If I met him in real life without knowing about his chess background I would guess that his IQ was in the low 90s.
Chess is not fun unless you add something to it, like cards, special moves, custom armies, explosions, anime prostitutes, etc.
Any vidya like this?
Pawnbarian
i like playing chess against friends because i use a bot on hardest difficulty to win against them.
Chess would be better if a draw is reached only if both kings died in the same turn. You check the king they can also check yours. Stalemate doesn't make sense.
duck chess is where its at
duck chess is kino
Needs more microtransactions.
israeli propaganda designed to install helpless in the commoners.
the boring kind of autistic
>use anal vibrator
>win
Broken game
t. magnus